GUILTY PLEASURES
BLOOD
(1974) - This is one of Andy Milligan's least-seen, but most
enjoyable films (it also doesn't hurt that it's a tad under one hour
in length). Of course, to enjoy any Andy Milligan flick, you need two
things: 1) a tolerance for long-winded dialogue scenes and 2) an
understanding of why the homosexual Milligan thought so little of the
Catholic Church or its religion (reading Jimmy McDonough's book, "The
Ghastly One: The Sex-Gore Netherworld Of Filmmaker Andy Milligan"
should also be a prerequisite for anyone interested in Andy's films
or simply the life of a tortured soul). To me, at least, there's no
doubt that Milligan had talent; for no matter how much he prattled-on
about his distaste for religion, he at least transported the viewer
to some alternate universe where people spoke the Queen's English
even in the most extraordinary of circumstances. Watching a Milligan
film is akin to stepping in a time machine (anachronisms be damned!)
and being transported to an era that only existed in Milligan's
twisted mind. BLOOD opens sometime in the late Nineteenth
Century, with Dr. Lawrence Orlofski (Allan Berendt) returning to the
United States (Staten Island, NY, to be more precise) with his wife
Regina (Hope Stansbury), who suffers from a rare blood disorder where
exposure to five minutes of sunlight could burn her alive (We see the
effects of the sun on her face in the beginning of the film when Dr.
Orlofski and his servants fail to bring Regina into the new house in
a timely manner. Maybe they should have waited until nightfall. Just
a thought.). Regina must be injected weekly with a serum her husband
has created to allow her to live a normal
life. Dr. Orlofski believes that their solicitor, Carl Root (John
Wallowitch), may be robbing them blind and plans on confronting him
about it in the near future because he needs the family fortune to
continue his research. Carrie (Patti Gaul), the good doctor's
assistant, is in love with Dr. Orlofski and a practicing Catholic,
which pisses-off Regina because she has an aversion to Carrie's
crucifix. Carrie also has a bad infection in one of her legs and may
have to have it amputated if Dr. Orlofski doesn't cure it soon.
Speaking of legs, the Orlofski's butler, Orlando (Michael Fischetti),
is missing both of his and gets around in a wheeled cart that he
pushes around with his hands. The maid, Carlotta (Pichulina Hempi),
is a deaf mute who also must take daily injections in her
junkie-scarred arm. As you can probably tell, this is one fucked-up
household and to add insult to injury, Orlando and Carrie drain a
couple of pints of blood from Carlotta nightly (for use in the
doctor's serum) and there are a bunch of man-eating plants in the
basement (the doctor uses extracts from the plants for the serum) and
they are growing hungrier by the minute (one of them tries to bite
Orlando's hand off!). When Dr. Orlofski finally visits Carl Root, he
discovers that there is not much money left in the family fortune
(Carl has been robbing them blind), but there's not much he can do
when Carl threatens to expose the doctor's real last name, Talbot
(Larry Talbot? Uh, oh!). When Carrie's brother, Tommy (David Bevans)
comes for a visit and sees what a sorry state his sister's leg is in
(it turns out that Carrie's leg was another victim of those damned
basement plants), he threatens to go to the police, but Regina lures
him down to the basement, buries a meat cleaver in his head (a
Milligan staple) and dissolves his body in a tub of acid (the bottles
have "ACID" crudely written on them with magic marker!).
Nosy realtor Mr. Markham (Martin Raymart), who is renting the house
to Dr. Orlofski, sneaks into the house and when he is caught snooping
around, Orlando knocks him out with a shovel and feeds him to the
plants, while Regina chops-off the head of a live mouse (there's
really no reason for showing it, but Milligan does) and eats it! Dr.
Orlofski gains the trust of Carl's secretary, Prudence (Pamela
Towers), they fall in love and she agrees to help him recover papers
from Carl's office that will return the family fortune. In a
not-so-surprising twist, we discover that Larry is a werewolf, Regina
is a vampire and their marriage was pre-arranged in the "Old
Country" between the Talbot and the Dracula families! The finale
finds a fully transformed Larry battling a dimestore-fanged Regina as
the house burns around them. In the Epilogue, the house is restored
and is then bought by Baron and Mme. Von Frankenstein! My hand to
God! The first thing you'll notice about BLOOD
is how quickly it moves, which, if you're an Andy Milligan fan like
me, is highly unusual. This could be because of the participation of
producer Walter Kent (who also has a small role as a man in Carl's
office and whose entire movie career seems to be just this film) and
not Milligan's usual producers, the legendary William Mishkin
(Milligan's BLOODTHIRSTY BUTCHERS
- 1970; THE MAN WITH TWO HEADS
- 1972; THE
RATS ARE COMING! THE WEREWOLVES ARE HERE! - 1972) and later,
his son, Lew Mishkin (CARNAGE
- 1983; MONSTROSITY
- 1987), who always "tinkered" with Milligan's finished
product. There are some noticeable jump edits here, especially during
the film's bloodier scenes (and there are a few, including Johnny's
murder, the lancing of Carrie's puss-filled leg, Prudence's
neck-biting and the mouse head-eating scene), but those were probably
done at the behest of distributor Bryanston Films, a Mob-run business
who were notorious for cutting films to their bare minimum for
playing on the bottom tier of double and triple features (just look
what they did to JACK
THE RIPPER GOES WEST [1974] and LEGACY
OF SATAN [1972] for further proof). The IMDB lists a running
time of 74 minutes, a claim I find highly dubious. Still, this is one
of Andy Milligan's most accomplished efforts and Milligan fans (you
know who you are) should search it out. Also starring Hazel Wolffs,
Joe Downing and Eve Crosby as Petra, an old hag who gets her hands
cut off (the sight of her obvious mannequin arms during the aftermath
is hilarious). I don't believe this ever received a legitimate home
video release in the U.S.; the print I viewed was sourced from the
British VHS tape from Iver Film Services (which is supposedly a
boot). Now available on a double
feature Blu-Ray with LEGACY
OF SATAN from Code Red
(whose Blu-Rays of previous Milligan films are extraordinary), sold
exclusively through Screen
Archives Entertainment who sell it in a 69-minute version. I will
report the differences (there's over 10 minutes of footage not seen
on home video before!) when I receive it. Rated R.
BLOOD
AND BLACK LACE (1964) -
When people ask me how the giallo genre got started, I usually
mention this film. While not the first giallo movie, it is the one
best remembered, thanks to director/co-screenwriter Mario Bava's (FIVE
DOLLS FOR AN AUGUST MOON - 1970; A
BAY OF BLOOD - 1971; SHOCK
- 1977) use of color, sensuality and brutal violence, which was
copied by the many giallo films that followed it. Mario Bava was an
innovator in many genres and when he passed away (in 1980), it left a
large hole in Italian genre cinema, as no one (with the exception of
Dario Argento) was able to reproduce his way with a camera (Bava was
a cinematographer first and filmed many of the films he directed,
including this one) and creating an atmosphere of dread
thick enough to cut with a knife (pun intended).
The film begins in a very unusual way, by introducing the actors
individually, as they pose motionless next to mannequin counterparts
(it really is strange and memorable). We then see model Isabella
(Francesca Ungaro) arrive at the Christian Haute Couture agency in
the middle of the night, but she never makes it to the front door, as
someone dressed in black (with a large black floppy hat) and a
stocking over their head strangles her with their black gloved hands
and then drags her away. The owner of the agency, Countess Christina
Como (Eva Bartok; THE GAMMA PEOPLE
- 1956), tells her partner in the business, Max Marian (a dubbed
Cameron Mitchell; Bava's KNIVES
OF THE AVENGER - 1966), that this is the third time Isabella
is late and if she is ever late again, she is fired. There is a big
fashion show tomorrow and the Countess is very nervous, yelling at
some models for not properly taking care of the clothes they are
going to wear tomorrow. We then learn that the Countess recently lost
her husband in an automobile accident and she has not been the same
since, but is she ready for what happens next? When the Countess
opens a closet door, she discovers Isabella's bloody dead body. The
police arrive at the scene and Inspector Sylvester (Thomas Reiner; THREE
FANTASTIC SUPERMEN - 1967) questions everyone at the agency,
including the visiting Marquis Richard Morelli (Franco Ressel; EYE
IN THE LABYRINTH - 1972), the boyfriend of model Greta (Lea
Krugher; ACHTUNG!
THE DESERT TIGERS - 1977), but why does dress designer Cesare
Lazzarini (Luciano Pigozzi; LIBIDO -
1965; who doesn't use his pseudonym "Alan Collins" here,
which is a rarity) snicker when Greta tells the Inspector that
Richard is her fiancé? It is obvious that drug use is rampant
at the agency, because, earlier in the film, we saw Frank Scalo
(Dante Di Paolo; Bava's EVIL EYE
- 1963) telling model Peggy (Mary Arden; A...FOR
ASSASSIN - 1966; she also wrote this film's adaptation as
"Kelly Leon") that Isabella took his "stuff" and
he needs some now. We also saw agency employee Marco (Massimo Righi;
Bava's PLANET OF
THE VAMPIRES - 1965) popping some pills after fixing the
agency's sign, which slipped off one of its hinges and was swinging
in the breeze. The Inspector is sure he has seen the Countess before
and she says it was probably at the scene of her husband's fatal
accident, just before she walks away, saying she has some important
business to take care of. When the Inspector becomes unrelenting in
his questions to Isabella's two roommates, Peggy and Nicole (Arianna
Gorini), Cesare interrupts, telling the Inspector that he should talk
to Isabella's boyfriend, antique dealer Frank Scalo.
The Inspector goes to Frank's antique shop and questions him, but
his answers are very elusive (Frank tells him that he doesn't believe
in "exclusive" relationships and Isabella was not his
girlfriend, just a mere acquaintance), especially when he sees the
Inspector holding a small bundle of cocaine. The Inspector asks Frank
if he ever saw the cocaine before, telling him a detective found it
in Isabella's room. Frank blatantly lies, saying he didn't know
Isabella used drugs. It is plain to see that the Inspector knows he
is lying, so he leaves, telling a nervous Frank that he will see him later.
At the fashion show at the agency the next day, the Countess can't
get any of her models to wear the dress Isabella was supposed to
wear, all of them saying that the dress is bad luck, that is until
Nicole volunteers to wear it (One of the models says this about
Nicole: "She doesn't believe in anything."). We also see
Marco sneak off to pop a couple of pills. When Marco sees Nicole in
Isabella's dress, he says something is missing, a brooch. The
Countess says that the brooch belonged to Isabella, but she kept it
at the agency, so everyone begins going through boxes looking for it.
Nicole finds it in one of the boxes, along with Isabella's diary and
when she announces what she has just found, everyone stops in their
tracks, all of them having worried looks on their faces (Luciano
Pigozzi really looks like Peter Lorre here, thanks to Bava's use of
shadows and primary color lighting, one of his signature trademarks).
Nicole begins reading the diary to herself, saying, "This is
gold!" and begins reading it out loud, saying, "He
is a man that awakens such deep feelings in me that, afterwards, I
feel limp, empty...", but before she can read
anything else, Cesare rips it out of her hands and Marco says no one
should read it, these are Isabella's innermost private thoughts. The
Countess agrees and takes the diary out of Cesare's hands, saying it
should be handed over to the police. Nicole asks the Countess for the
diary, saying she is the one who found it and she will hand it over
to the police tomorrow. Nicole places the diary in her purse, sets it
on a table and the walks to the runway to display Isabella's dress to
an applauding audience. Everyone stares at the purse while Nicole is
on the runway, but no one dares to touch it. When Nicole is done, she
makes a phone call to Frank, telling him to come to the agency, she
found Isabella's diary and he is mentioned in it. What Nicole doesn't
know is someone is standing in the shadows listening to her
conversation. Frank tells Nicole he will be right over and if she has
"some" (drugs), he will feel better, so they can go through
the diary tonight before she hands it over to the police tomorrow.
As Nicole is preparing for her next runway walk, Frank phones her to
say he is not coming over because he is sick ("I feel like I am
suffocating!") and tells her to come to his shop immediately.
Nicole tells him she will do her best to get there as soon as
possible, but she is not done with the fashion show yet, but she will
think of something. Nicole tells Peggy that Frank is sick and she
needs to go see him right away, asking for the keys to Peggy's car.
Peggy gets the keys out of her purse (pay close attention to the
purse) and gives them to Nicole, telling her to be careful of the
car's burglar alarm. If it goes off, the button to turn it off is
located in the back
of the glove compartment (Is this important? Damn right it is!).
Nicole drives to Frank's antique shop (she activates the car alarm as
she gets out), but when Frank doesn't answer the door, she lets
herself in (she has a key to the front door). When Frank doesn't
answer her shouts out for him, it's apparent he is not there, but the
killer is, turning out the lights and chasing Nicole through the shop
(wonderfully done, as Bava once again proves to be a master of gel
lighting and shadows), ripping off Nicole's dress (quite risqué
for 1964) and killing her by planting a suit of armor's metal claw
in her face. The killer escapes in Peggy's car (when the car's alarm
goes off, the killer knows where the button is to turn it off) and
drives away, unaware that a gas station attendant sees the car
speeding away, writing down the car's license plate number.
Peggy gets a ride home and Marco keeps her company until Nicole
returns with the car. We then meet Clarissa (Harriette White Medin; THE
GHOST - 1963), Isabella, Nicole and Peggy's housekeeper
(Bava leads us to believe that she is the killer [she is wearing the
same type of clothes as the killer] by filming her from behind as she
stokes the fireplace, until Peggy calls out her name and she raises
her head). When Clarissa leaves, Marco professes his love to Peggy,
but it is easy to see that he is jonesing (maybe he needs a couple of
pills?). When he reaches into Peggy's purse for a cigarette, she
yells for him to stop. Peggy then gets a phone call from the
Inspector, who tells her that her car was found abandoned, asking if
it was stolen. Peggy says no, Nicole borrowed it, yet she doesn't
tell him that Nicole went to Frank's shop, telling him instead that
Nicole went to a sick friend's place to take care of him. Why doesn't
she mention Frank's name? I bet you can guess (Remember, Frank
doesn't believe in "exclusive" relationships). The
Inspector tells Peggy he will be right over, it is best to talk to
her in person. Marco excuses himself and leaves, telling Peggy it is
best if the police didn't know he was there and Peggy agrees. When
Marco leaves, Peggy reaches inside her purse and pulls out Isabella's
diary (Remember when I told you to pay attention to Peggy's purse?
Well, it's an exact duplicate of Nicole's and Peggy pulled the old
switcheroo, giving Nicole her purse). Peggy begins reading the diary
and one entry gets her attention: "October
16: I caught Peggy trying to steal $1,000
from my purse. She began to cry and explained how much she needed
it. She was pregnant and was not able to face the scandal. I felt
sorry and I loaned her the money. It means that tomorrow I will ask
him for $2,000."
Peggy rips the pages out of the diary, throws them in the fireplace
and watches them burn. Then she throws the entire diary into the fire
(it's best to get rid of all the evidence, because the ripped out
pages would be easily spotted by the police). She stokes the
fireplace to make sure the diary is nothing but ash, when her
doorbell rings. Thinking it's the Inspector, she opens the door to
discover it is the killer. The killer grabs her and instead of
talking, writes down "Where is the diary?" on a pad (pay
close attention to the pad). Peggy screams out, "I burned
it!", so the killer checks the fireplace to see if she is
telling the truth. Peggy then reaches for the phone, only for the
killer to slap and punch her about the face repeatedly until she is
unconscious. Hearing the police sirens approaching, the killer
carries Peggy's body out of the house just as the Inspector and his
men arrive, wondering why Peggy left the front door wide open.
A short time later, Frank arrives at the Marquis' house, where
Richard and Greta are having dinner. Frank tells Richard and Greta
that he found Nicole dead in his shop and he wants Richard to supply
the police with an alibi for him by telling them that he was with
Richard and Greta all day. Frank reminds Richard that he saw him at
the agency that day when he showed up to meet Nicole, but she wasn't
there (proving that the phone call Nicole received at the fashion
show was not Frank at all, but the killer pretending to be him).
Richard asks Frank why he didn't call the police when he found
Nicole's body and he says Nicole was his girlfriend and the police
wouldn't believe he didn't kill her, once again begging Richard and
Greta to supply him with an alibi. Frank then says to Richard,
"You're just as much to blame as I am!", reminding Richard
that he signed an IOU to Isabella for a loan of several thousand
dollars, yet he knew he couldn't pay her back because he is flat
broke and pretending to be rich, not a penny to his name (Greta asks
Richard if it is true and walks away crying). Frank blackmails
Richard, saying it is a perfect excuse for killing Isabella, so he
better tell the police that he was with him all day, or else he will
tell the police about the unpaid loan. Richard can do nothing but
agree with Frank's demands, especially when Greta tells Frank that
she told Richard about Nicole finding Isabella's diary (Whew!).
We then see Peggy tied-up and blindfolded in some dank basement,
where she tells the killer that she burned the diary because it
contained some personal information on her that she didn't want made
public, but the killer doesn't believe her, slapping her hard on the
face several times and then burning her hand on the metal of a
red-hot furnace. The killer then finishes her off by pressing her
face up against the hot metal furnace. The Inspector arrives at
Frank's shop and accuses him of supplying drugs Nicole and the rest
of the models. He is also not interested in hearing Frank's (fake)
alibi (we then get a close look at Nicole's bloody body as it lies on
the floor of Frank's shop).
The Inspector then pulls all the men in to the police station so
Clarissa can make an identification. Cesare accuses Marco of being
the killer (especially when Clarissa tells the Inspector that he was
with Peggy just before she disappeared) and Marco asks for his pills
as he collapses to the floor. It turns out he is not a drug addict at
all, the pills he was taking are for his epilepsy, so he doesn't have
an epileptic fit. The Inspector tells Max and Cesare that any of the
men could be the killer, even them, because none of them have alibis
that will clear them. The Countess and all her models meet at the
agency at 9:00 pm that night. Max then phones the Countess and tells
her that all five men, including himself, are being held by the
Inspector on suspicion of murder. The models, especially Tao-Li
(Claude Dantes; THE HYENA
OF LONDON - 1964), believe that one of the men is the killer,
so they will all be safe tonight. Wanna bet? Greta wants to sleep at
the agency, but the Countess says no, there is another fashion show
here tomorrow, so it is best if she goes to her home in the country
and that Tao-Li is correct, she will be safe tonight.
When Greta gets to Richard's mansion, she discovers Peggy's dead
body in the trunk of her car. Rather than calling the police, she
drags Peggy's lifeless body into the mansion, just after getting a
hang-up phone call, doing it quietly so the butler doesn't discover
her doing it. The killer then appears and smothers Greta with a
pillow. Think you know who the killer is? All the clues are in this
review if you read between the lines (when an officer gives all the
men back their personal belonging after Greta is murdered, it is very
obvious who the killer is, but did they have an accomplice?). We know
who isn't the killer, but do you have the chops to know who it is?
(Here's an important clue, one I shouldn't have to tell you: The
killer only murders beautiful women in a way that destroys their
beauty, usually doing it to their faces). Nobody here is clean, as
they are either blackmailers, drug addicts or just plain despicable,
so finding a killer (or killers) amongst them will prove to be
difficult, but not impossible. Do you have what it takes?
One look at this film and you will instantly understand why Mario
Bava was called a master of his craft. This may seem like rehashed
giallo tropes by some people, but they must understand that back in
1964 there was nothing quite like this film, it was totally original
in its concept and execution, which is why it was copied and expanded
upon in the years to follow, adding full frontal female nudity and
quite graphic violence into the mix, but there is no doubt that this
film is the granddaddy of all giallo flicks. It supplied the blueprints
for giallo films to come (i.e. the killer dressed in black; the
killer's POV; plenty of red herrings; etc.). This is the film to
thank if you are a fan of giallo films. From the unusual opening,
Bava's use of color and shadows, some pretty brutal violence, to the
twisty mystery (co-written by Bava and Marcello Fondato [UNCLE
WAS A VAMPIRE - 1959]), it is clear why Bava is adored by
people who understand what makes films like this so special. There
was no one quite like Bava, although many tried, some making a name
for themselves (Dario Argento; Sergio Martino) and some failing
spectacularly (Riccardo Freda and Ruggero Deodato are good examples,
as is Bava's son, Lamberto Bava, who tried to follow in his father's
footsteps, but mostly came up snake-eyes). This is the giallo film
that every fan should watch, if only to see how the genre got its
start, but this is a great film when viewed on its own.
Shot as SEI
DONNA PER L'ASSASSINO ("Six Women For The Killer"),
this film received a U.S.
theatrical release in 1965 from Woolner Brothers Pictures,
albeit in edited form (removing scenes of sexuality and violence or
shortening them by several frames). This version was released on VHS
in 1984 by Media
Home Entertainment and it wouldn't be until the year 2000 that
the uncut European version would be released in widescreen on VHS
and DVD by VCI Home Entertainment,
who then released a 2-disc
DVD set in 2010, the first disc containing the uncut film and the
second disc containing a wide range of extras, including interviews
with Cameron Mitchell and Mary Arden, trailers for the film from
around the world, a comparison of the American and European versions
(showing us the footage that was cut for U.S. consumption) and
musical tracks from the film, from composer Carlo Rustichelli (Bava's KILL,
BABY...KILL
- 1966; and Umberto Lenzi's GANG
WAR IN MILAN - 1973). All in all, a nice package. VCI also
released a Blu-Ray/DVD
combo pack of the uncut European print in 2017, with the same
extras as their 2-Disc DVD set. In 2015, Arrow
Video released a Blu-Ray/DVD
combo pack of the film with their usual plethora of informative
extras. If you are an Amazon Prime member and not interested in the
extras, they offer the European version streaming in a very nice
anamorphic widescreen print dubbed in English. I gave the streaming
version a quick perusal and it looked superb, Bava's use of colors
popping off the screen, making it look like it was filmed yesterday.
It looked so good, my quick perusal turned into a night of watching
the film again (for a third time in a row!). Also featuring Giuliano
Raffaelli (THE LONG
HAIR OF DEATH - 1964), Goffredo Unger (THE
FOUR OF THE APOCALYPSE - 1975), Calisto Calisti (FOUR
FLIES ON GREY VELVET - 1971) and Enzo Cerusico (THE
DEAD ARE ALIVE - 1972) as the Gas Station Attendant. Not Rated,
but this is pretty strong stuff, especially for 1964.
BLOOD
RAGE (1983)
- Extremely gory Florida-lensed regional horror film. You may
have seen this film under its alternate title, NIGHTMARE
AT SHADOW WOODS (released to theaters and cable TV under
this title in 1987), and are saying to yourself, "Hey, Mr.
Smarty Pants, this film isn't bloody at all!",
but what you watched was a severely edited version of the film. Not
only were all the gory murders totally removed and sequences switched
around, even the ending was changed to "soften" the film.
If you want the entire bloody goods, then your only choice is the BLOOD
RAGE version, and it's a keeper. At a drive-in in Jacksonville,
Florida (where they are showing THE
HOUSE THAT CRIED MURDER [a.k.a. THE
BRIDE] - 1973, which turns out to be a sly in-joke, because BLOOD's
director, John Grissmer, produced and co-wrote it!) during the
Summer of 1974, sex is running rampant (Ted Raimi puts in a cameo as
a condom salesman in the drive-in's mens room) and even Maddie
(Louise Lasser; SLITHER -
1973), the divorced mother of identical twins Todd and Terry (who are
sleeping in the back seat), wants a little lovin' from her new
boyfriend. The twin boys wake up and sneak out of the car while Mom
is necking and Terry picks up a hatchet, walks a few cars away,
whacks a necking guy about the face until it is nothing but a bloody
pulp and then gives the hatchet to Todd, wipes the dead guy's blood
on his face and screams for Mommy to look what Todd has done. Todd is
committed to a mental institution and ten years pass. Todd's
psychiatrist, Dr. Berman (Producer Marianne Kanter), informs Maddie
that Todd's memory has come back and he remembers Terry committing
the murder. Maddie, of course, doesn't believe Todd (Mark Soper; THE
UNDERSTUDY: GRAVEYARD SHIFT II - 1988) and continues to
treat him like a child, while Terry (Soper again) is seemingly living
the normal life of a teenager. While Dr. Berman tries to free Todd
from the institution, Maddie announces over dinner that she is
marrying her long-time fiancé Brad (Bill Fuller), the manager
of the Shadow Woods apartment complex they live in, which upsets
Terry, but he hides it with a fake smile. Todd escapes from the
institution before Dr. Berman can legally release him and soon the
murders begin. Dr. Berman shows up at Shadow Woods with her assistant
Jackie (Doug Weisner) and a tranquilizer pistol and begin their
search for Todd, while Terry (or is it Todd?) walks into Brad's
office and cuts off his hand with a machete. Todd/Terry make Jackie
the next victim by running him through with the machete. Dr. Berman
is next on the list when she is cut in two at her waist. Wouldn't you
know it, Terry's virgin girlfriend, Karen (Julie Gordon; SUPER
FUZZ - 1980), decides tonight's the night she wants to pop
her cherry, but she asks Todd instead, who is more than happy to
oblige, but Karen figures out who he is before he can get in her
panties. It all ends in a bloody mess of mistaken identities, as
Terry goes about killing everyone in sight (he's a virgin, too, but
he only has eyes for Mommy!) and, once again, blaming Todd for it
all. Will Mother set everything right? There is not much that
is surprising story-wise in BLOOD RAGE, but director John M.
Grissmer (SCALPEL -
1976) and screenwriter Bruce Rubin (ZAPPED!
- 1982, who takes the pseudonym "Richard Lamden" here)
offer so many gory deaths and unusual character traits, it's hard not
to get involved in the goings-on. Louise Lasser is her usual nutso
neurotic self. When she is not drinking heavily, she can be found
sitting on the kitchen floor in front of an open refrigerator,
pigging out on whatever is available or vacuuming the house while
soused. There's a long sequence where an intoxicated Maddie tries to
call Brad (who is already dead) on the phone and she gives the
operator a hard time or keeps dialing the wrong number. I'm flummoxed
why this sequence is even i
n
the movie at all, when all Maddie has to do is walk a couple of door
down to Brad's office, which she ends up doing in the finale. Maybe
it was in Ms. Lasser's contract that she needed more screen time and
this is what Bruce Rubin came up with. But it's the gore on display
that will make you sit up and take notice. The sexually repressed
Terry kills without mercy, whether it's decapitating neighbor Julie's
(Jayne Bentzen) sugar daddy and hanging his head at her front door;
cutting off Brad's hand and positioning his head on the stump;
cutting Dr. Berman in two so that she can watch her legs twitching
before she dies; slicing-up Gregg (Chad Montgomery) and Andrea (Lisa
Randall) while they are making love on the pool's diving board;
shoving a barbeque fork into Artie's (James Farrell) neck; Karen
discovering Terry stabbing Julia in the chest with a machete, before
Karen grabs Julia's baby and makes a mad dash for their lives; Maddie
discovering Brad's posed body and then discovering that his head was
cleaved in two; and the frantic finale, where Maddie puts an end to
the horror at the apartment complex's indoor pool and then commits
suicide when she realizes she killed the wrong son! (In the NIGHTMARE
version, she doesn't commit suicide). Add copious amounts of nudity
and a twisted sense of humor (although Mark Soper is weak as an
actor) and most horror fans will probably have a good time with this.
Also starring Gerry Lou, Ed French and twins Keith & Ross Hall as
young Terry and Todd. The VHS tape from Prism
Entertainment is the only uncut version of this film available.
All other versions are cut to shreds and unwatchable. UPDATE:
Now available in a deluxe 3-disc
combo DVD/Blu-Ray pack that contains 3 versions of the film (!)
from Arrow Video that
includes the gore-filled version. Rated R.
THE
BLOOD SPATTERED BRIDE (1972) - "The
good ones are those who are content to dream what the wicked
actually practice." - Plato
So begins this Spanish horror film, based in part on Sheridan Le
Fanu's story "Carmilla". Simon Andreu (TORMENTOR
- 1972) is the nameless husband who has just gotten married to Susan
(Maribel Martin; THE HOUSE THAT SCREAMED
- 1969), so he drops her off at a hotel so she can change out of her
bridal gown while he parks the car. As she is entering the hotel, she
notices a blond-haired woman glaring at her angrily in another car.
As Susan is about to get changed
in her room, she opens a closet door, where a man with a stocking
pulled over his face jumps out and rips the wedding dress off her
body (full frontal nudity) and rapes her. When her husband enters the
room, the rapist is gone and Susan doesn't tell him what has just
transpired, saying to him she doesn't like this hotel and wants to
leave immediately, which they do.
He then takes his new bride to his family castle and introduces her
to his staff, where the Housekeeper (Montserrat Julio; IT
HAPPENED AT NIGHTMARE INN - 1973) introduces Susan to her
young daughter, Carol (Rosa Rodriguez; KNIFE
OF ICE - 1972), who hands Susan a single red rose. Susan
asks Carol how old she is and she says fourteen, but her father
(Angel Lombarte; THE
KILLER WITH A THOUSAND EYES
- 1973), the Butler, tells Susan that Carol is only twelve, she likes
to pretend she is older. Susan then asks Carol if she likes school
and she says yes, but her teacher recently died. The Housekeeper
tells Susan that she died in a car accident, Carol is still very
upset about it and she's starting with a new teacher tomorrow. Susan
asks if she was fond of her teacher and Carol shakes her head yes.
Andreu (which I will call him in this review since he doesn't have a
proper name. Will it be revealed later?) says he hasn't been to his
family castle in many years, telling Carol the last time he saw her
she was just a baby. As the Housekeeper shows Susan to her room, her
wedding veil gets snagged on a miniature cannon on the floor. Is this
a portend of things to come?
As Andreu tells the Housekeeper, "It's been a long journey. And
full of exciting events", Susan looks out the window of the
master bedroom and sees a strange woman in a wedding gown with a
shawl pulled over her head walking away. We then find out Susan is a
virgin, Andreu saying to her, "We should have made love
before." Susan shoots back with, "You never asked me!"
He asks Susan if he should turn around while she undresses or should
he undress her? "Whatever you like", replies Susan, so he
rips her wedding dress off her body, revealing it was him who raped
her back at the hotel (It's not much of a surprise since Andreu has a
very prominent nose, one that cannot be hidden with a stocking pulled
over his head). Susan screams in terror and Andreu tells her to be
quiet or the servants will hear her. Susan then sits on the bed and
gives herself freely to her husband, like any obedient wife should
(if you are a sandwich short of a picnic, that is!). Andreu then rips
off her bra and panties and does the dirty, Susan with a look on her
face as if to say, "What have I gotten into?"
The next Morning, Andreu wakes up Susan and says, "Sweet
morning. You lived through your wedding night." Susan says to
him, "This isn't the first time you've been with a woman",
and he doesn't deny it, Susan saying it doesn't matter because he was
good, very good! She asks him how she was and all he has to say is
"great", but he doesn't say it convincingly. He licks her
navel and makes her laugh, which the Butler hears and smiles. They
spend the whole day in the bedroom, the Housekeeper leaving their
meals by the bedroom door. We then discover Susan is an artist,
drawing a portrait of her husband. Everything seems happy and
peaceful for the newlyweds, as they make love nearly everywhere in
and around the castle (Carol listen to them making love while she is
feeding the many captive pigeons that are kept in a large walk-in
cage). Andreu shows his true colors when he goes fox hunting with the
Butler. A female fox has been caught in one of the traps and instead
of letting it free and giving it a chance to live, he puts both
barrels of his shotgun into the fox at point blank range. I wonder
what he would have done if it were a male fox?
Susan begins to notice all the portraits of her husband's male
ancestors hanging on the castle walls and particularly takes notice
that many of them died at an early age. She asks Carol if she knows
who any of them are and she says no, it's not allowed to talk about
them. Susan wonders why there are no portraits of women hanging on
the walls and carol Tells her that they are downstairs, in the cellar
(I don't know about you, but I'm getting a distinct feeling that it
is not safe being a woman in this unnamed family. It would be so much
better if this family had a proper fucking name, but something also
tells me there is a reason for that!). Susan asks her husband why all
the women's portraits are in the cellar and he says he doesn't know,
he didn't put them there. Susan doesn't want to hear it, demanding
that the portraits be "rescued", brought upstairs and hung
next to their male counterparts. Andreu's answer is to scoop Susan up
in his arms, carry her to the bedroom and boink her, which she
doesn't seem to mind.
We then see Susan in the woods, shouting out, "It's me! Can you
hear me?" We then see the woman with the shawl, whom Susan calls
"The Bride." Andreu suddenly appears behind Susan and when
she asks him if he saw The Bride, his answer is to lift her up by her
hair and then forcing her to give him oral sex! Before he can finish,
Susan breaks free (spitting and wiping her mouth with her hand,
leaving no doubt to what had just transpired) and runs away, Andreu
calling for her, saying, "Come on. Don't be silly!" (like
forced oral sex isn't rape!). We then see (in a sequence that makes
no sense at all) some naked male legs walk into the bathroom and get
into the bathtub, where Susan is taking a bubble bath. Susan looks up
and says, "Oh, no, please", as if this has happened before.
Andreu then begins calling for Susan, so she runs into the pigeon
cage and locks herself in. Andreu tells Susan to open the door, but
she then takes her hair ribbon, ties the cage's key to it, attached
it to a pigeon and lets it fly into the wild. Andreu gets so angry
she did this that he kicks the cage's door open. If you are looking
for answers from me, I'm afraid I am as in the dark as you are, but I
hope this film tries to explain half of the story's many confusing
scenes. It turns out that this scene does have an explanation. Susan
is teasing her husband so he will make love to her in the pigeon cage
(yeech!). He begins to, but then Carol appears to feed the pigeons
and the "romantic moment" is lost.
While Susan is painting Carol's portrait, she tells Susan that her
husband put all the women's portrait in the cellar; her mother told
her he did. She also tells Susan that her husband's grandfather
discovered that his newest bride was trying to poison him and she ran
away to Paris to get away from his abusive behavior. When Susan asks
Carol if her mother also told her that, Carol replies, "No, at
school I heard that. Everybody knows about it!" Susan says it is
nothing but wild stories, but Carol says it's all true and that's the
reason all the women's portraits were taken down and put in the
cellar. Carol then says, I think you like it when he hurts you",
but Susan tells her, "Nobody hurts me" and then hands Carol
her portrait. Carol acts disappointed, asking, "Is that how I
look?" Susan says she's even prettier than the portrait and then
asks Carol if she has seen the women's portraits in the cellar. Carol
says yes, she has seen them, so Susan grabs a flashlight and heads to
the cellar, looking at the portraits. Nearly all of the portraits are
of women who can politely be called homely, but one portrait gets her
attention. It is that of a beautiful woman holding a dagger and when
she looks at the nameplate, it reads "Mircala Karstein".
But wait, is that dried blood streaming down the portrait or was it
painted that way? (There is also a fairly shocking jump scare during
this time.) When Susan looks at the portrait again, it has Carol's
face, Carol revealing that Mircala's portrait had her face cut out,
but why? Susan laughs at the funny faces Carol makes, but the
laughter quickly stops when Andreu grabs Susan's shoulder and shines
his flashlight in her face. He looks at the portrait and says,
"Do you know who she was? If you knew, you wouldn't laugh."
He tells Susan to come with him and he will tell her all about
Mircala Karstein. He takes Susan to the family crypt, which is in
ruins, pieces of stone architecture piled up in the middle, forming a
small mountain of rock and rubble. He then shows her Mircala
Karstein's tomb, where he kicks it and it produces a hollow sound, as
if it were empty. Susan asks if this is really Mircala Karstein's
tomb and Andreu replies, "I suppose so." She then asks if
Mircala belonged to his family and he replies, "Yeah, in a
way." (For someone who promised to tell Susan all about Mircala,
Andreu's answers are very evasive, aren't they?). "But your name
isn't Karstein", says Susan, her husband answering that it was
her maiden name and she didn't have time to change it (To WHAT for
Christ's sake? For crying out loud what is your fucking family name?
I'll even accept a nickname at this point!). Andreu tells Susan that
Mircala didn't have time to change her name because she killed her
husband, his grandfather, on their wedding night. Susan walks away
and her husband says that, according to legend, it was because her
husband tried to make her do "unspeakable" things (I guess
it runs in the family). When Susan asks what unspeakable things,
Andreu replies, "Nobody knows" because it was omitted
prudishly from family records, which is a shame, because "it
would be the most amusing part of the story." Susan asks how
Mircala died and her husband says she didn't die, she was found
spattered with blood while still wearing her wedding dress, next to
the dead body of her husband. Her eyes were wide open and rigid, with
warmth and color in her body. "They waited for two years before
they decided to bury her, but they never managed to take the dagger
out of her hand, burying it with her. You see, even though Mircala
was clinically dead and she had no pulse, her body didn't begin to
decompose, so they buried her and wiped her memory from the family
records." (Which would explain why her face was removed from her
portrait). I wouldn't be giving anything away by telling you that
"The Bride" is actually Mircala Karstein (Alexandra
Bastedo; I HATE MY BODY
- 1974) and if you know anything about Sheridan Le Fanu's story
"Carmilla", you know that she is a lesbian vampire. Since
what I have explained to you happens in the first thirty minutes,
allow me to summarize what happens next before this turns into a
short story rather than a review.
*Andreu opens Mircala's tomb for the first time in 200 years, picks up a forearm bone and snaps it in half in Susan's face, sending her running in fear. He tries to make it up to her by making love to her, but Susan refuses, telling him, "You're like a puppy waiting for its food."
*Mircala visits Susan in her bed, hands her the dagger ("It's yours now.") and bites her on the neck. Andreu tells her it was nothing but a dream, but she changes his mind by showing him the dagger. Carol tells Andreu that she put the dagger in Susan's bed and that a lady in a wedding dress gave it to her in the woods, telling her to put it in Susan's bed. Andreu takes the dagger and hides it, telling Susan she will never find it. Wanna bet?
*That night, Mircala pays Susan another visit and shows her where Andreu hid the dagger. Susan takes the dagger and, with Mircala's help, stabs her husband over and over in the chest while he sleeps. Mircala then removes Andreu's heart and eats it. It all turns out to be a dream, however, because in the morning Andreu is still alive.
*Andreu then buries the dagger on the beach and he discovers a nude woman buried in the sand, who is wearing a scuba mask and breathing below the sand using a snorkel! She gets into Andreu's car and he drives her back to the castle and gives her a room. Susan meets the woman, who tells her that her name is Carmila (also played by Alexandra Bastedo). Andreu seems more interested in Carmila then he does his wife. Susan paints Carmila's portrait ("Is that the way you see me?") and they soon become fast friends. Susan looks at the portrait she drew of The Bride and notices she looks exactly like Carmila. She tells her husband that Carmila will force her to kill him and he tells her not to be ridiculous, they can't possibly be the same person. He begins to worry when he sees his wife taking midnight strolls with Carmila. Susan starts to act distant and angry at her husband, thanks to Carmila. Hatred for him is infecting Susan's blood and mind. Andreu calls in a Doctor (Dean Selmier; SCHOOL OF DEATH - 1975) to examine Susan and he tells him that he should take Susan to a psychiatrist, but Andreu says it's too late for a head-shrinker, showing the Doctor proof that Carmila is a vampire. The Doctor laughs at him, saying it's him who needs a psychiatrist. The Butler tells the Doctor that he saw Susan and Carmila in the woods and Carmila was biting Susan on the neck. The Butler also says the two women were howling "Like two cats in heat. They sounded like vampires!"
*The Doctor decides to spy on Susan at night, following her as she walks through the woods in a trance, seeing her meet Carmila and following them into the family crypt. He hears Carmila say to Susan, "I live only through your vibrant life. And you will die gently, in order to live through me." Carmila punctures an open wound in Susan's hand, drinks her blood and then makes Susan say, I hate him!" over and over, telling her that her husband has "pierced her flesh to humiliate her" and "He has spat inside your body to enslave you" (That's an interesting way to describe it!). Their moans of pleasure make the Doctor slink away, telling Andreu that Susan is under the control of a lesbian (!) and that his life is in danger because "three is a crowd"!
*We then discover that Carmila is Carol's new teacher at school and she is under Carmila's control. Carol hands her the key to the locked drawer where Andreu hid the dagger. Susan gets the dagger and stabs the Doctor to death (with Carmila's help) when he tries to stop her. Then Susan and Carmila go after Andreu, but he is expecting them. Carmila tells Susan, "Find his heart and cut it out! Silence him!", but he jumps in his car and drives away. Carmila gets her foot stuck in a fox trap and the Butler finds her and tries to tie her hands behind her back, but Susan viciously slashes him with the dagger, finishing him off with both barrels of his shotgun.
*The finale comes with Andreu finding Susan and Carmila totally naked and sleeping in Carmila's coffin. He closes the lid and fires a volley of bullets from his rifle into the coffin. A river of blood flows from the bullet holes and then Carol appears, saying, "They come back. They cannot die." Andreu then shoots Carol in the back of her head! He then opens the coffin, where we see him using the dagger to cut off Carmila's left breast. The film ends by showing us a newspaper article, where the headline reads, "Man Cuts Out The Hearts of Three Women."
This is a sexy, gory trip into Spanish Gothic horror, punctuated by
graphic bits of bloodletting (much of it involving the dagger) and
crammed with full-frontal female nudity. Director/screenwriter
Vicente Aranda (LEFT-HANDED
FATE - 1966; THE
EXQUISITE CADAVER - 1969) has adapted Sheridan Le Fanu's
story (Changing the names slightly from "Carmilla Karnstein"
to Carmila Karstein" to avoid legal copyright laws), pre-dating
Bram Stoker's "Dracula" by twenty years, and placed it in
modern times, but there are many Gothic moments, including Andreu's
rather large and creepy castle,
as well as the stone edifices surrounding it (including the decrepit
family crypt) and the dark and dank cellar, placing it in the ranks
of some of the best Italian Gothic horror films of the '60s. It is
the nudity and sex, however, which makes this film so surprising. I
remember watching
this film on TV in the late-'70s and not being impressed, because
all the nudity, sex and extreme violence were edited out, making the
film nothing but a shell of its former self. Simon Andreu is no
stranger to the genre, starring in NIGHT
OF THE SORCERERS (1973), as well as many giallo flicks,
including THE FORBIDDEN
PHOTOS OF A LADY ABOVE SUSPICION (1970), DEATH
WALKS IN HIGH HEELS (1971) DEATH
WALKS AT MIDNIGHT (1972), right up to the affecting EYES
OF CRYSTAL (2004). He is still acting up to this day. Be
aware that this is a slow-moving film, yet it is never boring, thanks
to Aranda's keen eye for the little things, which will eventually
later morph into things very important to advance the plot (Mircala's
face being removed from her portrait being one of those "little
things"). This is a film that demands all of your attention, so
if you plan on cutting your toenails when watching this, I would
advise you not to because you're likely to miss some important info.
While I wouldn't go as far as to call it a classic of the Gothic
horror genre, this is still a quite enjoyable and eye-opening foray
into sex and violence, sometimes within the same scene, making this
the perfect film to watch on a rainy night with all the lights out.
Are you brave enough to watch it under these conditions?
Filmed as LA
NOVIA ENSANGRENTADA ("The Bloody Bride") and also
known as BLOOD CASTLE, this film obtained a theatrical
release in the United States in 1974 by Europix International,
in a severely edited print that still received an R-Rating by the
MPAA. This edit was missing all the full-frontal female nudity, as
well as some of the more graphic bloodletting. It is this version
that made its way to the many VHS
releases in the U.S., from companies like Gorgon
Video and Vestron
Video. Be aware that the VHS tape released by Ariel
International Releasing (A.I.R. Video),
titled TIL
DEATH DO US PART, clocks in at 83 minutes and is missing
nearly 20 minutes of footage, so avoid it at all costs. In 2000,
Anchor Bay Entertainment released an uncut widescreen version of this
film on VHS
& DVD. Blue
Underground also released it on DVD
in 2006 (my review is based on this DVD) and, in 2018, Mondo
Macabro released it on Blu-Ray.
If you are an Amazon Prime member in the States, the uncut
widescreen print is available streaming for free. This uncut version
is Not Rated. Oh, and one final thing: They never gave the
husband a fucking proper name! Or the Butler. Or the Housekeeper. Or
the Doctor. If there's some hidden meaning for doing this, I'd be
interested in hearing it!
BODY
MELT (1993) - I'm a sucker for
Australian horror films. They just have that something
"extra" that is missing from most American horror films.
This one is no different, even though it is basically nothing but a
gore comedy with the thinnest of plots. It's a beautiful day in the
cul-de-sac of Pebble's Court in the town of Homesville. Everyone is
doing their morning thing like jogging, going to work or wise-ass
kids telling jokes ("Want to hear a joke?" "Elton
John!"). That peacefulness and tranquility will soon be broken
and in one of the worst ways possible. You see, Pebble's Court is
being used by a pharmaceutical company to test out its newest dietary
supplement "Vimuville" and the side effects are killer. A
traitorous pharmacy representative drives towards Pebble's Court to
tell them what is going on, but by the looks of him, he's not doing
very well. Pharmacy executive Shaan (Regina Gaigalas) assures
Pebble's Court's doctor, Dr. Carrera (Vincent Gil), who knows all
about the trials and is keeping a personal track of Vimuville's
progress, that the man will never make it to Pebble's Court and, even
if he does, he will be too far gone to say anything. We then see the
man stopping at a gas station store and asking the counterman where
the detergent is. He then proceeds to drink an entire bottle of
dishwashing detergent as his neck begins to split open. He throws the
counterman his credit card and drives off,
where he is chased by police. The man talks into a mini-recorder,
where he says the following things: "Stage 1:
Hallucinations Stage 2: Organ Failure Stage 3: Body
Melt" before crashing into a van in the cul-de-sac, his body
flying through the windshield. We then see tentacles come out of the
man's throat wounds and enter his mouth, but they quickly retreat
when the police get closer. Detective Sam Phillips (Gerard Kennedy; PANIC
STATION - 1982; WOLF
CREEK 2 - 2013) and his partner Johnno (Andrew Daddo) are put
in charge of the case and Sam finds the mini-recorder and plays it,
but doesn't understand what it means...yet (Johnno is mainly around
for comedy relief). The two wise-ass kids, Gino (Maurice Annese) and
Sal (Nick Polites) ask Sam if it is OK if they leave town to go get
laid and Sam says yes, so the stupid pair end up at some strange
establishment where everyone looks inbred (and they even have a
three-legged dog). Meanwhile, a man from Pebble's Court goes to the
airport and keeps on seeing women who aren't really there (Stage 1).
He then imagines that one woman in an airport hotel room removes one
of his ribs because it will complete her collection of 13 men's ribs
(we see her massage his chest and then pull the rib out of his body).
Sal gets lucky with one of the inbred daughters (who looks like a man
dressed as a woman), only to get a pitchfork impaled into his crotch
while they are making love in a chicken coop. Gino tries to get away
by stealing the family's truck, but all it does is drive around in
circles (!) and he is quickly surrounded and killed by the inbred
family. What does this have to do with the rest of the film? Read on.
Sam finds the Vimuville bottle in the man's car, so he and Johnno go
to the pharmaceutical company, where they get nothing but the company
line by Shaan. Sam finds that highly suspicious. As more and more
free samples of Vimuville are delivered to everyone in Pebble's Court
by mail, things begin to get weirder and weirder. Dr. Carrera begs
Shaan to step down the dosages of Vimuville, especially on the
pregnant Cheryl Rand (Lisa McCune), but Shaan step-ups the experiment
because she has outside investors interested in the supplement.
Cheryl lies on a bed and her stomach explodes and tentacles shoot out
her stomach and vagina (but no baby) and hit her husband Brian (Brett
Climo) in the face (Stage 2). Brian is taken away by the police and
charged with Cheryl's murder, but Sam believes there is something
fishy going on. The residents of Pebble's court begin experiencing
body changes and none of them are good. Thompson Noble (Adrian
Wright) begins to shoot so much snot out of his nose, he slips on it
and kills himself by hitting his head on the sharp edge of a bathroom
counter. His son Brandon (Ben Guerens) is rollerblading on a
skateboarding ramp and tries a fancy move, only to fall on his face
where all the skin on his face falls off (all we see are teeth
without lips). Dr Carrera kills a man with a hypo shot, but not
before he rips off the doctor's ear. When Sam and Johnno find the
dead man, the ear has grown on the dead man's palm (It gives a whole
new meaning to "Talk to the hand!"). An earless Dr. Carrera
goes to the inbred establishment, where we find out that the father
is actually Dr. Carrera's brother and he use to work in the
pharmaceutical company's laboratory and has developed and antidote
which he took with him (it still makes absolutely no sense why the
entire family is inbred). One muscular guy chokes his girlfriend to
death while they are making love as we watch his back split wide
open. Another guy's penis explodes and splatters all over a TV screen
(We see his erection through his shorts and then the bloody deed).
When Thompson Noble's wife Angelica (Jillian Murphy) sees that her
husband's body is literally encased in snot, she grabs her daughter
Elloise (Amanda Douge) and leaves the house (after witnessing
Elloise's boyfriend's head implode inside his body!). They drive to a
doctor's office and Angelica's tongue swells to about two feet long
and she chokes to death. The doctor says that Pebble's Court was
built over a chemical dump over twenty tears ago and that, mixed with
Vimuville, have caused all these strange deaths. Dr. Carrera goes to
kill Shaan, but finds out she has dissolved into a pile of goo (Stage
3). Sam and Johnno shut down the pharmaceutical company and save the
day, but as the final shot shows us, Vimuville is already on grocery
store shelves. This Australian gore comedy (which walks the
fine line between hard R-Rated and NC-17 territory, including a full
view of a dead man's penis on the coroner's table) is the only
directorial effort by Philip Brophy, who also wrote and mixed the
music, co-wrote the screenplay (with co-producer Rod Bishop), drew
all the storyboards and was sound designer. While the film doesn't
add up to much in the logic department for its 82-minute running
time, it will satisfy those looking for goofy, gory deaths (supplied
by Bob McCarron), with no CGI in sight. Just good, old bladder
effects, exploding body parts (the pregnancy death is a standout) and
lots of dripping goo and tentacles (Which are not explained. Are they
a new life form or just a side effect of Vimuville? I also believe
some of the deaths were edited to get an R-Rating, especially the
pitchfork scene.). Add a good sense of humor, put your brain in
neutral and just go for the ride. It is what it is. Nothing more.
Nothing less. Also starring Neil Foley, Anthea Davis, Matthew Newton,
Lesley Baker, Amy Grove-Rogers and Suzi Doughtery. Originally
released on VHS by Prism
Entertainment. The DVD offered by Scorpion
Releasing is a pristine anamorphic widescreen print that looks
great. This is a very colorful film and the colors snap on this
print. Rated R (The
Prism Entertainment fullscreen VHS gives it an "AO"
[Adults Only] Rating, but it contains no extra footage than what is
on the DVD).
CALTIKI,
THE IMMORTAL MONSTER (1959) - "This
is a sacred Pyramid in the dead city of Tikal, 300 miles south of
Mexico City. Here, for thousands of years, the Maya once lived, a
civilized and peaceful people with a deep-rooted knowledge of
mathematics and astronomy. But one day, in the year 607 AD, this
people emigrated en masse towards the distant, wild north, abandoning
the sturdy dwellings, the pyramids and the temples they had built.
None of the Maya came back. The cities remained deserted and the
jungle slowly swallowed the streets and buildings, erasing
every trace of their civilization. The scientific expeditions that
tried to shed light on these events were never able to provide a
satisfactory explanation. Some believe there was an enemy invasion,
but what powers at that time could have defeated the Mayan people?
There are no signs of natural disasters and what catastrophe could
have force a people to build a new kingdom, abandoning the land where
that had always lived? The mystery still remains today and the
nomadic Indians who travel across the region speak of how their
ancestors fled the land to escape the wrath of a terrible goddess, a
bloodthirsty goddess...Caltiki!"
So begins a film that scared the crap out of me when I was a child
(giving me nightmares for days), watching it on TV's "Chiller
Theatre" in the early-to-mid-'60s. I wanted to return to this
film for the longest time to see if my memory wasn't playing tricks
on me (Childhood memories can be disappointing when unmasked by an
adult brain), but this film was harder to find than the truth at a
Republican Party convention (No more politics, I promise). Thanks to Arrow
Video, who released this film in a DVD/Blu-Ray combo pack,
giving it the respect it deserves (some may think the behind the
scenes stories are be more interesting than the film itself, but
there's no denying that this film is important on many levels), I can
finally see it the way it was meant to be seen, for the very first
time. While this Italy/USA co-production may be considered a
knock-off of the original THE BLOB
(1958), I would say that this is the better of the two films, even if
it lacks that film's color scheme (it's in black & white, but I
love black & white films). The cinematography (by Mario Bava, as
"John Foam", but more on him later) is second to none and
the scares are here in spades. I would go as far as to say that this
film was way ahead of its time, as no 1950's horror film has its
mood, atmosphere and sense of style. I'm not trying to put this film
on a pedestal (even though it deserves to be), I'm just saying that
this is one of the few films that didn't disappoint me in the 50+
years since I last saw it. It is actually better than I remembered it.
After a volcano eruption in the lost city of Tikal, expedition
member Nieto (Arturo Dominici, as "Arthur Dominick"; CASTLE
OF BLOOD - 1964) stumbles back to base camp, a pistol in his
hand, and collapses in the tent of Professor John Fielding (John
Merivale; CIRCUS OF HORRORS -
1960) and his wife Ellen (Didi Sullivan). It seems Nieto is the only
surviving member of an expedition trying to find out what happened to
the Mayan people by exploring the rubble of Tikal, but he is unable
to tell anyone what happened because he is in a state of shock. When
John examines Nieto's pistol, he tells his associate and friend, Max
Gunther (Gerard Haeter; SECRET
AGENT SUPER DRAGON - 1966), that it is empty, no bullets in
it. Max wonders where the bullets went, since the area Nieto and his
group were exploring is completely deserted. When the Professor says
they will have to go to the Tikal cave to see what happened to their
friend Ulmer (Daniele Pitani), Nieto springs up from his bed and
screams, "Ulmer...The Mummy...The
Mummy...Caltiki...Caltiki...Caltiki!!!" and then falls back into
bed, unconscious. Max says that Caltiki is a Mayan deity, so John,
Max, Bob (Daniele Vargas; EYEBALL
- 1975) and the rest of the group leave for the Tikal cave, leaving
Ellen and Linda (Daniela Rocca; THE
GIANT OF MARATHON - 1959) behind to take care of Nieto. Once
in the cave, everyone yells out Ulmer's name, but no one
answers. They find a new opening inside the cave, which John
says must have been caused by the volcanic eruption. They see
footprints leading into the opening and, thinking they are Ulmer's,
they follow them, but not before taking a Geiger counter with them,
just to be on the safe side. Once inside the opening, they discover
ancient stone steps, which lead them to an undiscovered temple, where
an enormous statue of the goddess Caltiki stands guard. They all
think they have made an amazing discovery, but they ain't seen
nothing yet. The Geiger counter then begins registering high doses of
radioactivity, the needle going to maximum. What could be causing
such high radioactivity? John and Max think it is coming from the
water, a "sacred lake" next to the temple where priests use
to drown their victims they sacrificed to their goddess Caltiki, but
it is actually coming from something far more deadly. They find
Ulmer's movie camera next to the lake, thinking that Ulmer must have
drowned, so they go back to base camp to get their scuba gear so they
can explore the bottom of the lake, not seeing Ulmer's desiccated
corpse on the other side of the lake as they leave.
Once back at base camp, John and Max discover that Nieto has gotten
worse. Bob has developed the film in Ulmer's movie camera, so they
all sit down to watch the footage. They watch Nieto and Ulmer
entering the area in the cave that they were just in, as Nieto finds
an ancient bracelet, holding it up for the camera. Suddenly, the
camera starts shaking and a visibly shaken Nieto pulls out his pistol
and begins firing, then the footage ends. Ellen wants to go back to
Mexico City immediately, fearing for her and everyone's lives, but
John says no, they have to go back to the caves to save Ulmer, if he
is still alive. John then goes to watch an Indian girl (Gay Pearl)
dance in an ancient ritual, while Max tries to comfort Ellen, telling
her that John is acting like a fool (Max has the hots for Ellen, but
she is not interested).
Back at the sacred lake, Bob puts on a wetsuit and scuba gear,
diving to the bottom of the lake, discovering numerous human bones,
as well as a wealth of gold and ancient pre-Columbian treasures. When
Bob exits the lake, he tells everyone they are rich beyond their
wildest dreams. All they have to do is dive to the bottom and collect
all the ancient gold and jewels below. John doesn't want Bob to put
his life in danger, but he insists, diving to the bottom and
collecting as much gold and jewelry as he can fit into a cloth bag.
Then something attacks Bob and when John and Max pull him up by the
rope attached to his waist, they find that Bob's head is nothing but
a skull covered in some gelatinous substance (yet his body is still
breathing!). The lake starts bubbling and all their native guides run
away in fear, as a massive blob arises from the lake and heads
towards John and Max. They run up the ancient stone steps, when Max
realizes that they left the bag with the jewels and gold next to the
lake. Greed gets hold of Max and he will pay for it, as when he goes
to retrieve the bag, the blob encases his right arm, but John cuts
off the piece of blob that has Max's arm and they escape, but not
before John kills the massive blob by driving a truck full of
gasoline drums into the cave, jumping out just before the truck
explodes, burning the blob to a crisp, killing it. But, if there is
one thing we know about blobs, it is that you must destroy 100% of
it, leaving no pieces of it alive and letting it grow exponentially.
John cuts the piece of the blob from Max's arm and puts it in a
glass container. John becomes famous in scientific circles, holding
conferences all over the world, displaying his new discovery. His
piece of the blob is stored at his laboratory in his home, where
Ellen and their young daughter live. John tells Ellen that Max is in
serious condition (the right side of his body, including his face is
eaten away, like he was splashed with acid), John telling her that
Max's life depends on him figuring out what makes this new life form
tick. If he can figure it out, he may be able to reverse Max's
condition (a doctor at the hospital Max is in tells John that Max is
beginning to go insane). John gets the idea that radioactivity from
the volcanic eruption may have given life to the long-dormant blob,
so he contacts Professor Rodriguez (Vittorio Andre; DEATH
LAID AN EGG - 1968) and asks if he can use his
"Betatron", to bombard the blob with electrons, hoping it
will somehow lead to reversing Max's condition (The hows and whys are
never explained). John brings a piece of his piece of the blob to
Professor Rodriguez's laboratory, where the Professor's nameless
assistant (a young Giacomo Rossi Stuart; THE
NIGHT EVELYN CAME OUT OF THE GRAVE - 1971) bombards it with
electrons. It seemingly works, but there is a more pressing problem.
Max has escaped from the hospital, as crazy as they come, killing a
nurse during his escape. Now the police are after him, too, using
dogs to sniff out his scent (This part of the film mimics THE
QUARTERMASS XPERIMENT [a.k.a. THE
CREEPING UNKNOWN - 1955] to some extant). I'll give you one
guess where Max is heading. That's right, he is heading towards Ellen
who, in his twisted, diseased mind, is the only woman he ever loved.
John is forced to leave Ellen and his daughter alone when Professor
Rodriquez's assistant calls and tells him the blob is alive and
growing rapidly. John tells him that he will be right over, but he
should set fire to the laboratory and kill the blob. Once John gets
to the lab, he finds it completely destroyed by fire and the blob
dead. We then discover that an approaching comet in the sky is
somehow affecting the blob, as the piece of the blob that John has in
his home laboratory is growing rapidly. Somehow, the comet causes
Professor Rodriguez to lose control of his car, as he drives off a
cliff and it explodes, killing him. Just when Max arrives at John's
house, the blob grows to enormous proportions. Max kills Linda (Who
loved him!) and takes Ellen prisoner, but before he can rape her, the
blob bursts through a wall and engulfs Max, turning him into a
skeleton. The blob chases Ellen and her daughter upstairs and starts
to slowly destroy the house (The sight of the blob oozing upstairs
trying to devour Ellen is very well done). John, who is being held in
a room in a Mexico City police station, under arrest for assisting
Max's escape (!), escapes and races home, as the police follow him.
They will soon forget about John and have to deal with the giant blob
that destroys everything in its path. Can John save his wife and
daughter and kill the blob? Maybe flamethrowers will work.
First let me get this out of the way: Even though Riccardo Freda (THE
GIANTS OF THESSALY
- 1960; THE
GHOST - 1963; THE
IGUANA WITH THE TONGUE OF FIRE - 1971; TRAGIC
CEREMONY - 1972; MURDER
OBSESSION - 1981), here credited as "Robert
Hampton", is listed as the sole director, the fact is that Mario
Bava (BLACK SUNDAY
- 1960; BLOOD
AND BLACK LACE - 1964; PLANET
OF THE VAMPIRES - 1965; A
BAY OF BLOOD - 1971) actually directed the bulk of the film
but, due to contractual obligations, could not be credited as a
director (Freda would later claim that he abandoned this film so Bava
could show everyone what a good director he was. That is simply
untrue, because it doesn't explain how Bava directed parts of Freda's THE
DEVIL'S COMMANDMENT - 1957 and still didn't get directorial
credit). Since Bava was also the film's cinematographer (as he was on COMMANDMENT),
it is wonderfully photographed, full of Bava's patented lush and
atmospheric cinematography, especially the cave sequences. Even the
way the blob is shot (My friend from across the pond told me that the
blob was actually made of tripe, the stomach lining of a cow, which
Italians eat for dinner!), using miniature sets and forced
perspective, are very well handled (much better than the Steve
McQueen-starrer), giving believability to the blob's deadly touch.
Especially outstanding are the deaths, which are quite graphic for a
late-'50s production, especially Bob's skull-headed body still
breathing and Max's death, which are shocking and unforgettable. I
still remember those deaths after 50-odd years, when I first saw them
on TV. Seeing it now is no different. They are still as disturbing as
when I was a child, one of the few films to stand up to my childhood
memories of it. So, if you want to see a film that out-blobs THE BLOB,
look no further than this gem, a crackling good horror film with
much to recommend. Also starring Nerio Bernardi (as "Black
Bernard"; PSYCHOUT FOR MURDER
- 1969), Rex Wood and the prolific Tom Felleghy (NIGHT
OF THE DEVILS - 1972). Not Rated. NOTE: For those who
don't care about extras, Amazon Prime offers the film on their
streaming site (Free to Prime members) in a nice letterboxed print,
in Italian with English subtitles.
THE
CANAL (2014) - "Who
wants to see ghosts?" These words are spoken by
David Williams (Rupert Evans; THE BOY
- 2015), an archivist at Irelend's National Film Archives who, along
with co-worker Claire McManus (Antonia Campbell Hughes; ANDRON
- 2015), are showing a series of short films from the years 1895 to
1905 to a class of young children. David continues with, "All
these people, men, women and children, have vanished off the face of
the Earth forever. So in a way, it's like we are watching
ghosts." The children groan, as they were expecting to see real
ghosts. David and his wife Alice (Hannah Hoekstra; the big budget
flop CHARLIE'S ANGELS -
2019) are about to purchase a house and David will soon realize that
ghosts are actually real.
Five years later, David and Alice are living in that house with
their young son Billy (Calum Heath), but David thinks his wife is
having an affair, since she gets texts on her cell phone in the
middle of the night. Alice tells him the texts are from her boss
Steven (Conor Horgan), saying because Steven has no life he thinks
his employees are at his beck and call twenty-four/seven. While David
is watching a recently discovered short film from 1902, which is
showing an apparent real-life murder, David suddenly realizes that it
was filmed on the road he now lives on. He then realizes that the
murder took place in the house he now lives in, watching the police
taking away murderer William Jackson (Padraig Curran) in handcuffs
out of the front door of his house. That night, David tells Alice
that he had a really strange day today, saying that he watched a
1902 film that their house was in. He says there was a murder in
their house; a man named William Jackson murdered his wife Margaret
(Alicja Ayres) in the very same bedroom they are in now. Alice tells
David not to worry about it; horrible things happen in every old
house. David doesn't know it (?), but more than one horrible thing
can happen in their old house and it doesn't have to happen in the
past; it could happen in the very near future.
David and Alice go to a fancy party thrown by her boss Steven and
his firm. They leave Billy in the capable hands of new babysitter
Sophie (Kelly Byrne). At the party, David becomes suspicious of his
wife, as men he has never met take special interest in Alice. She
tells David that they are new clients who wanted to talk business,
but she refused, saying this was neither the place or the time,
finishing by telling David, "I love you." I don't know
about you, but as a divorced man, this sets off red flags to me! At
his work, Claire tells David that he looks terrible, but it is quite
obvious by her actions that she has a romantic interest in David.
David starts having nightmares about the 1902 murder, only he is the
one killing William Jackson's wife; the creepy William suddenly
appearing when a bedroom wall splits in half, revealing William
smiling approvingly at David. David is also haunted by visions of
Alice having sex with a faceless man in their bed, so he picks up a
claw hammer and walks slowly towards them, waking up before he kills
them. When Alice leaves for work late at night and doesn't come home,
he goes to the police to report her missing. This results in a large
search for Alice, police and volunteers combing the woods and
long-abandoned buildings near their home, but they come up empty.
Police Detective McNamara (Steve Oram; ALTAR
- 2014) begins to think David is involved in Alice's disappearance,
telling him that Alice's lover came to the station to say he was with
Alice the night she disappeared and he also said that Alice was going
to divorce him. David denies it, telling the Detective that his wife
loved him and asking if he questioned Alice's lover. The Detective
says that her lover has an ironclad alibi that can be backed-up by
several witnesses. David then ask him why he thinks he was involved
in his wife's disappearance and Detective McNamara says to David,
"It's always the husband, every fucking time."
The next day, Alice's dead body id found floating in a nearby canal.
The coroner (Nick Devlin) declares her death as an accidental
drowning since there are no wounds on her body to conclude it
was murder. One of the heels on her shoes is snapped off, which may
have caused her to lose balance and fall into the canal, so with the
absence of any evidence to the contrary, he has to
conclude it was an accident. Then the coroner hits David with
something he wasn't expecting. It turns out that Alice was pregnant.
As David leaves the morgue, he sees a man sitting nearby, and after
David is out of sight, Detective McNamara escorts the man into the
morgue. Could this be Alice's lover?
Alice's mother Marie (Anneke Blok) believes David killed her
daughter and wants Billy to live with her, but David flatly refuses,
so she hurtfully tells David that Alice's lover, Alex (Carl Shaaban),
was so traumatized by her death that he had to be hospitalized. David
says he couldn't give a fuck and demands she leave his house
immediately. David then confesses to Claire that he followed his wife
the night she disappeared and he watched her having sex with Alex,
but he had nothing to do with her death, saying to Claire that all he
did was puke his guts out in one of the abandoned buildings near his
house (which was actually a public bathroom before it was abandoned).
David then begins to believe that ghosts are haunting his house and,
somehow, the 1902 short film holds the clues to Alice's death. Is
David going mad are is there truth to his beliefs? I'm afraid you are
going to have to watch the film to get any more answers, but this
film is so well made and scary, you'll thank me for not divulging more.
It's hard to believe that this film flew under the radar when
originally released in 2014, but that should in no way stop you from
enjoying it now. Director/screenwriter Ivan Kavanagh (TIN
CAN MAN - 2007; NEVER
GROW OLD - 2019) has fashioned a film that is pure nightmare
fuel, as there are many scenes here that will chill you to your core,
especially the sequence where David is talking to Billy via Skype on
his laptop and something happens that I guarantee will give you
goosebumps the size of grapes. It also has one of the most
spine-chilling finales that I can remember seeing for a long, long
time. Effectively acted by everyone involved (especially Rupert
Evans) and beautifully written by Kavanagh, this is one superb,
thoroughly frightening film you will never forget once you watch it.
Be prepared for several excellent jump scares (which I really hate,
but they are done well here), one of them so horrific (you'll know it
when you see it!), I would suggest you take your heart medication
before watching this totally scary supernatural horror film. This
film has the same visceral impact as THE
BABADOOK (2014), yet it got lost in the independent horror
film shuffle that year. It's time to recognize its greatness now!
Also featuring Serena Brabazon, Myles Horgan, Natalie Radmall-Quirke,
Rosaleen Byrne, Anthony Murphy and John Haugh. Available on DVD from
The Orchard and streaming on Amazon Prime, free to Prime members. Not
Rated.
CASTLE
OF BLOOD (1964) - I've
already reviewed director "Anthony M. Dawson's" (Antonio
Margheriti; CANNIBAL APOCALYPSE
- 1980) WEB OF THE SPIDER
(1971), which is a nearly verbatim remake of this film, also directed
by Margheriti, but unlike SPIDER,
this film is in glorious black & white, the perfect format for
an Italian Gothic horror film. Margheriti was an old hand at Gothic
horror, previously giving us HORROR
CASTLE (1963), and after this film, giving us the excellent THE
LONG HAIR OF DEATH (1964). But Margheriti was much more than
a horror genre director, making films in many different genres (see
my review of HORROR
CASTLE for but a small sampling of his output). He could do
anything and do it well, entertaining us all. This is one of those films,
which is why Margheriti is one of my favorite directors of Italian B-Films.
Reporter Alan Foster (Georges Rivière; JOURNEY
BENEATH THE DESERT - 1961) enters the Four Devils Pub and
listens to Edgar Allan Poe (Silvano Tranquilli, as "Montgomery
Gleen"; THE HORRIBLE DR. HICHCOCK
- 1962) telling one of his short stories about life after death to a
rapt audience of imbibers. Alan wants to interview Poe (he has been
refusing Alan's requests for quite some time) and after hearing Poe's
story in the pub, he tells Poe he couldn't possibly believe in the
afterlife, because it is nothing but a fallacy ("My fear is the
living", says Alan). Lord Thomas Blackwood (Umberto Raho, as
"Raul H. Newman"; TROPIC
OF CANCER - 1972), Poe's friend, bets Alan that he can't
spend one night in his castle, which is said to be haunted by the
dead. Since Alan doesn't believe in life after death, Alan takes Lord
Blackwood up on his bet for ten pounds, but only if he can interview
Poe. Poe says he would be glad to give Alan an interview, but only
after he spends the night in the castle. Alan agrees, so Poe
accompanies Lord Blackwood and Alan on the two hour carriage ride to
the castle, Poe telling Alan he will be waiting for him at the front
gate of the castle at dawn, that is, if he lives through the night.
Once in the castle, Alan does some exploring, finding a thick layer
of dust covering everything, as if no one has been inside for years,
but the grandfather clock in the room starts chiming, even though its
pendulum is not swinging back and forth. Alan begins talking to
himself and taking notes, when he hears music and sees people dancing
in the next room. The door then slams shut and when Alan opens it,
there's no one there. He starts playing the harpsicord, when a woman
touches him on the shoulder, scaring the life out of him (so to
speak). She introduces herself as Elisabeth (Gothic horror queen
Barbara Steele; NIGHTMARE
CASTLE - 1965), the sister of Lord Thomas Blackwood. Alan
says Thomas told him the castle would be empty and Elisabeth says her
brother tells everyone that, because, "To Thomas, I am
dead." Alan finds Elisabeth very beautiful and tells her so and
Elisabeth tells Alan he won't be lonely tonight. Another pretty
woman, Julia Alert (Margrete Robsahm), enters the room and Elisabeth
becomes angry and jealous, because Alan says she is beautiful, too,
and begins paying attention to her. Julia tells Alan she will not see
him in the morning and he asks if she is leaving the castle. "I
did not say that", replies Julia mysteriously. When Alan excuses
himself to retire for the night and leaves the room, the two women
get into an arguement, Elisabeth telling Julia that Alan is hers and
she better keep her hands off him. Julia reminds Elisabeth that the
castle "owns" her and she can never leave it, but Elisabeth
says it doesn't matter, because she has an eternity to spend with
Alan. Elisabeth then sneaks into Alan's bedroom and they make love,
but Alan can't hear Elisabeth's heart beating, thinking she is dead,
yet she is alive. Suddenly, a bare-chested, muscular man named
Herbert (Giovanni Cianfriglia, as "Phil Karson"; GUNAN,
KING OF THE BARBARIANS - 1982) bursts through the bedroom
door and stabs Elisabeth in the heart with a dagger. Alan grabs his
pistol and chases Herbert, shooting him in the back, as he falls down
dead. Alan goes back to his bedroom, but Elisabeth's body is gone.
When he exits his bedroom, Herbert's body is no longer on the floor.
Alan can't understand what is going on, but if he believed in the
afterlife, he wouldn't be so confused.
Alan then meets Dr. Carmus (Arturo Dominici, as "Henry
Kruger"; BLACK SUNDAY
- 1960; also starring Steele), a famous scientist and expert on
"metaphysical science", who disappeared years ago and was
never found. He tells Alan that Thomas let him live in the castle to
perform his experiments away from prying public eyes (Dr. Carmus
believes the body lives long after death and shows a disbelieving
Alan it is true by cutting the head off a live snake, as Alan watches
the snake's head and body moving independently of each other). He
also tells Alan that today is All Hallow's Eve, the night when all
the dead in the castle must relive their crimes and deaths over and
over, including Elisabeth's death at the hands of Herbert. Alan
doesn't believe a word of what Dr. Carmus says, that is until Dr.
Carmus takes him on a tour of the castle, where "The dead are
living tonight", as Alan watches a series of murders and deaths
involving Elisabeth, Julia and Herbert. Alan can't believe his eyes
and tells Dr. Carmus that all this is nothing but a perverse stage
play with actors. Dr. Carmus then disappears and Alan begins to
slowly go mad, as he watches people he has never seen before, who
were past castle visitors, get murdered in the castle. He then
watches Dr. Carmus opening Elisabeth's tomb, where her decaying
corpse is still breathing. Dr. Carmus then runs upstairs to his
office, where he is killed by Herbert. Dr. Carmus then appears behind
Alan, saying now Alan knows how he died, so it's too late for him to
leave the castle...alive. Alan tries to leave the castle, but all the
doors and windows won't open. All the dead people in the castle
approach Alan, telling him it's his turn to die ("Your blood
will be our life!"), but Elisabeth offers him a way to escape.
As dawn rapidly approaches, Alan find's himself in the castle's
crypt, all the dead people coming at him from all sides. Elisabeth
once again appears, and shows him a way out of the castle. Alan drags
Elisabeth with him, but she begs him to let her go, because she can't
leave the castle. Alan drags her outside, where Elisabeth turns into
a skeleton. Alan opens the front gate just as dawn arrives, thinking
he has won the bet, but the gate closes on its own, one of the gate's
iron spike impaling Alan in the neck, killing him. When Thomas and
Poe arrive at the castle and see that Alan is dead, Thomas pulls the
wallet out of Alan's coat, takes ten pounds from it, telling Poe a
bet's a bet, but he will make sure Alan's body is put in the castle's
crypt. Next All Hallow's Eve, the castle will have a new body to
haunt the next person to take Lord Thomas Blackwood up on his bet.
This is one of the last Italian Gothic Horror films I have yet to
review (there are some lesser-known ones that I will get
to...eventually) and now that I have, it has made me feel really sad,
because Gothic horror has become a lost art form on film and no one
did them better than Italy did. It also helped that Italy had (and
still has) many ancient castles to film in, so there was no need to
build sets, giving their films an extra layer of realism, missing
from Gothic horror films from other countries. And no one was better
at using castles to their full effect than Antonio Margheriti, who
knew exactly where to place cameras to make viewers feel there was
danger around every corner or in every shadow. This film displays
that talent expertly, as you never know what or who Alan will
discover as he walks through the castle, making us jump as he turns
every corner. You know a film is timeless when it affects me today
the same way when I first saw it in a theater over fifty years ago.
The screenplay, by Giovanni Grimaldi (as "Jean Grimaud"; THE
BLANCHEVILLE MONSTER - 1963) and Sergio Corbucci (as
"Gordon Wilson Jr."; the director/writer of the superior
Spaghetti Western THE GREAT SILENCE
- 1968), is full of many surprising, unexpected plot reveals, making
it one of the best Italian Gothic horror films I have seen, but if I
am being truthful, I have to say that there are precious few films in
this genre that I genuinely dislike. Sergio Corbucci was this film's
original director, but left after one week of filming and was
replaced by Margheriti. I believe the Gothic horror film genre is
dead today due that it's more effective in black & white and
shooting in that format is becoming a lost art form, as
"modern" audiences (i.e. Teens that have their cell phones
glued to their eyeballs) don't want to sit in a theater, or in front
of a TV, watching a black & white film (I actually had a friend
say, "Life is in color, so why should I watch a film that
isn't?" I wanted to punch him squarely in the face!). That's too
bad, for if a black & white film is done right, it can transport
you to a time and place where you don't realize, or care, you are not
watching a color film. I should also mention that people watching the
U.S. edit of this film are missing out on a scene containing
something very rare for a film of this vintage, namely a topless
scene by actress Sylvia Sorrente, who portrays Elsi Perkins, a
newlywed who comes to the
castle with new hudband William (Benito Stefanelli, as "Ben
Steffen"; THE SLASHER...IS
THE SEX MANIAC! - 1972), only for the both of them to be
murdered by Herbert. Still, the U.S. print offers us plenty of
scares, but it would have been nice if the topless scene was
included, but audiences in the '60s weren't considered
"adult" enough to see naked tits on the screen, especially
in a horror film (sexploitation films were in their infancy at the
time). Also strange is that neither Barbara Steele or Georges
Rivière names appear in the opening credits of the film, which
is weird, because they both play major roles in the film (and Barbara
Steele was well-known by American audiences at the time). The music
soundtrack, by Riz Ortolani (billed as "Ritz Ortolani"; SEVEN
BLOOD-STAINED ORCHIDS - 1972), is also very memorable,
increasing the scare factor in the castle by use of a theremin and
orchestral passages. Ruggero Deodato (billed here as "Roger
Drake"), the director of such films as JUNGLE
HOLOCAUST (1977) and THE
HOUSE ON THE EDGE OF THE PARK (1979), was the Assistant
Director here and has frequently said that working with Sergio
Corbucci and Antonio Margheriti on this film made him want to become
a director. The rest is history. This is not just a great horror film
it also has a history that was influential in many ways. If you
haven't seen this film, or even if you have in the past, jump on it
immediately! Gothic horror doesn't get much better than this.
Filmed as DANZA MACABRA
("Dance Macabre", based on the Edgar Allan Poe story of the
same name) and also known on TV as CASTLE OF TERROR (where
both Barbara Steele and Georges Rivière's names are inserted
into the opening credits), this film was released theatrically
in the United States by Woolner Brothers Pictures Inc. in 1964.
Strangely, this film never received a legitimate VHS release in the
U.S., but many gray market outlets, like Sinister
Cinema and CineFear, released it in that format, usually
crappy-looking prints with many emulsion scratches, using the
heavily-edited 74-minute TV print. The first official DVD
of this film came from Synapse Films
in 2002, who offered the complete uncensored International Version,
which runs 89 minutes and contains the topless scene (The U.S.
theatrical cut runs 82 minutes). Severin
Films offered this film on Blu-Ray
in 2015, as a triple feature disc, along with the films NIGHTMARE
CASTLE (1965) and TERROR-CREATURES
FROM THE GRAVE (1965), but, unfortunately, it's the
82-minute U.S. theatrical edit (it also contains a lot of emulsion
scratches, especially in the beginning and at reel changes, but it's
quite watchable). Avoid the prints streaming on YouTube, as they are
the heavily edited TV prints. Also featuring Johnny Walters, Merry
Powers, John Peters and Salvo Randone (SHOOT
FIRST, DIE LATER - 1974) as Lester, the coachman. Not Rated.
THE
CHILDREN (1980) - It's hard to
make a list of the best low-budget horror film of the early 80's and
not have this film appear in the top twenty. It's moody, scary and,
above all, shocking in the way it deals with children killing adults
and adults killing children. A toxic leak at the Yankee Power
Company's nuclear power plant causes a radioactive fog in which a
school bus full of children from the town of Ravensback passes
through (this film is a.k.a. THE
CHILDREN OF RAVENSBACK). Sheriff Billy Hart (Gil Rogers)
finds the bus abandoned on the side of a road opposite a graveyard
(the motor is still running and all the children's belongings are
still on it), with the children and bus driver nowhere to be found.
The sheriff stops at the first house on the bus's route to see if
student Tommy Button (Nathaniel Albright) has made it home, but
Tommy's mother is too zonked out on codeine to notice, so her
personal physician (and probable lesbian lover), Dr. Joyce Gould
(Michelle LaMothe), helps the sheriff search for Tommy and the other
children. Billy has his deputy, Harry Timmons (Tracy Griswold), set
up a roadblock to the only entrance in town to stop anyone from
leaving and to only let residents enter, since he begins to think
this is looking
like a mass kidnapping. We know this is not the case when the
acerbic Joyce declines a ride of from Billy (her distaste for men is
quite evident), discovers the bus driver's dead body in the graveyard
(his entire body looks burned to a crisp) and she is hugged by an
infected Tommy (you can tell the infected by their black
fingernails). Joyce suffers the same fate as the bus driver, as
Tommy's radioactive fingers burrow into Joyce's back and she
instantly becomes an overcooked steak. Katie, bar the door, because
some killer children are about to terrorize Ravensback! The children
instinctively head to their homes, but Billy seems to always be one
step behind. The only house he comes to before the children attack is
the one belonging to the loopy Dee Dee Shore (Rita Montone), who is
sunbathing topless by her pool while her muscle-headed boyfriend is
pumping iron. Dee Dee seems more excited about the prospect of her
daughter being kidnapped than her welfare (Most of the parents
depicted here are less than complimentary). Billy picks up John
Freemont (Martin Shakar), a parent of one of the missing children,
whose car has stalled on the side of the road and agrees to drive him
home after thay stop at the Chandler residence, but little Ellen
Chandler (Sarah Albright) has already given her mother and father the
hug of death. When Billy and John find Dee Dee's daughter, Janet
(Julie Carrier), walking down a dark road and discover her killing
power (she grabs Billy's hand and gives him a nasty burn), they race
to John's house, where his pregnant wife and young son (who was home
sick from school) are about to be attacked by their infected
daughter, Clara (Jenny Freemont). John and Billy have to make the
difficult decision to kill the children by the only means effective:
by chopping off their hands! The final coda should not come as a
surprise to eagle-eyed viewers who paid close attention when the
school bus passed through the radioactive cloud. What can I
say? This is one of those horror film that I can watch over and over
and never grow tired of. Director/co-producer Max Kalmanowicz (DREAMS
COME TRUE - 1984) and screenwriters Carlton J. Albright (a
co-producer here and also the director of the underrated LUTHER
THE GEEK - 1990) & Edward Terry (the star of LUTHER,
who also has a role here as a deputized hick) have fashioned a
creepy, atmospheric and scary horror film about what happens when
children become killers and how responsible adults (although there
are too few in this film, which I believe was intentional) must deal
with the situation. The screenplay handles the situation in a frank,
straightforward fashion (but not without some intentional humor) as
parents are confronted with a truly unique situation. Most of them
naturally go for the hug (Who wouldn't when they stick their arms out
and say "Mommy!"?), but Billy, John and John's wife, Cathy
(Gale Garnett), must make the heartbreaking decision that all the
infected children (who have gathered outside of John's house in a sly
tribute to NIGHT OF
THE LIVING DEAD - 1968) must die and the only way to kill
them is to cut off their hands. There is very little here left to the
imagination, as the children are shot (but they get right up) and
chopped into pieces (where they let out a god-awful growling sound),
but that's what makes this film work so well (the special effects are
surprisingly well done, especially the radiation burnings). This is a
parent's worst nightmare and THE CHILDREN
illustrates that nightmare in a way very few horror films can. Harry
Manfredini did the evocative music score and if it sounds a little
like his score for FRIDAY THE 13TH,
it's because he did this film directly after finishing FRIDAY.
This would make a perfect double bill with DEVIL
TIMES FIVE (1974), another effective killer kids flick.
Remade in 2008 as THE CHILDREN,
but the plot is distinctly different in tone. Also starring Joy
Glaccum, Jeptha Evans, Jessie Abrams, Suzanne Barnes and Shannon
Bolin. Originally released on VHS by Vestron
Video and then on a truly abysmal DVD from Troma
Entertainment. Try to find a boot of the Vestron tape. Rated R.
CHOPPING
MALL (1986) - Jim Wynorski
has directed more than 100 films since 1983's THE
LOST EMPIRE, sometimes using a myriad of pseudonyms to cover
up the fact that he is so prolific. Although Wynorski made his fair
share of stinkers (SCREAM
QUEEN HOT TUB PARTY - 1991; MUNCHIE
- 1992; and a few more), I believe his win column is much larger than
his loss column, with films like NOT
OF THIS EARTH (1988; and Traci Lords' first straight film), HARD
TO DIE (1990); SORCERESS
(1994); THE CURSE OF THE KOMODO
(2003; some of the best CGI in a low budget horror film) and this
film (which is his second), which is my favorite and, among other
things, could probably happen today. What was science fiction back in
1986 is science fact today. Plus, it has pretty girls (a Wynorski
trait, although as he became bigger in the genre community, so did
the women's chests and I also like him because he is so unapologetic
about it) and a wicked sense of humor. This is the perfect top half
of a double feature (remember them?), where there is nudity, some
fantastic gore (one shot in particular still has me stumped how he
pulled it off) and a great cast of genre actors in cameo roles.
Officially, this is Wynorski's second film and it is still fondly remembered
by almost everyone who originally saw it in theaters. The film opens
with Dr. Sam Simon (Paul Coufos; FOOD
OF THE GODS II - 1989) showing a short film (basically a
commercial) to a bunch of mall and store owners for a new kind of
protection robot, called the "Protector 101 Series". We
watch a burglar (Lenny Juliano) breaking into a jewelty store and
then getting electrically stunned by a Protector robot (it's half the
size of a human. red in color and looks like a more streamlined R2D2)
when he refuses to obey the robot's commands. Dr. Simon assures the
audience that the robots are safe, especially Paul Bartel and Mary
Woronov (who return as their characters Mr. & Mrs. Bland from EATING
RAOUL - 1982), so safe, in fact, that he plans on using
three of the robots to patrol the mall they are in for the next few
nights (too bad none of the many stores' employees are ever told
about it). This just happens when a bunch of teenage employees, from
various stores and restaurants, plan to spend the night at the mall
after the stores close and party (Drink and have sex, that is). A
freak electrical storm hits the mall and does something bad to the
robots. It's like they have become self-aware and don't care too much
for humans (The original and more fitting title for this film is KILLBOTS,
which it was first released theatrically as, but it did bad business
because people were expecting some type of robot-like kiddie film
that was popular at the time and not a gore film, so uncredited
Executive Producer Roger Corman cut over 15 minutes out of the film
[it originally ran 95 minites and now runs 77 minutes] and renamed
it, where it did much better business. The TV version adds several
minutes of outtakes, because the cut footage was gone and could not
be found, probably for good [another Corman trait], so the film could
fit in a 2 hour timeslot.). After the comical opening credits (Look
for Toni Naples [Wynorski's TRANSYLVANIA
TWIST - 1989] in a bikini and Rodney Eastman [I
SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE - 2010] as a shoplifter), we see pizza
joint worker Alison Parks (Kelli Maroney; NIGHT
OF THE COMET - 1984) being clumsy and dropping dishes,
annoying the cook and owner (Mel Welles; the director of LADY
FRANKENSTEIN - 1971), who says, "Oh, you a-breaking my
heart!" Co-worker Suzi Lynn (Barbara Crampton - RE-ANIMATOR
- 1985) sets up Allison on a blind date for the party tonight, which
happens to be nerd Ferdy Meisel (Tony O'Dell; EVILS
OF THE NIGHT - 1984) who is acting as boss for his father's
furniture store and keeps getting taken advantage of by co-workers
Mike (John Terlesky; Wynorski's DEATHSTALKER
II - 1987, who went on to be a successful TV series
director), Suzi's boyfriend, and Greg (Nick Segal; SCHOOL
SPIRIT - 1985), who will also be at the party. Also at the
party will be husband & wife Rick & Linda (Russell Todd &
Karrie Emerson) and Leslie (Suzee Slater; CARTEL
- 1990), Mike's girlfriend. Mr. Todd (Arthur Roberts; Wynorski's BIG
BAD MAMA II - 1987) catches daughter Leslie and Mike kissing
and Leslie tells her father she and Mike are excited to be going over
to Suzi's house for her birthday tonight (a total lie). The first
casualty of the robots is Technician Marty (Morgan Douglas), who is
looking at the centerfold in an issue of Playboy, when a robotic arm
comes tearing through the centerfold and crushes his neck. Technician
Nessler (Gerrit Graham; TERRORVISION
- 1986) is the next victim, as one of the robots shoots and kills him
with a miniature grappling hook to the back of his neck in the
Control Room. Without any technicians, the robots are able to do as
they please throughout the mall. After the mall closes, the party
begins and Ferdy is about to meet Alison for the very first time (We
can spot a poster for Jack Hill's SORCERESS
[1982] in the mirror and if you look hard enough, you can see a
poster of Wynorski's first film during the pizza joint shots.). It's
love at first sight for Ferdy, but since he's a nerd, he takes things
very slow, unlike the rest of the revelers. Everyone but Ferdy and
Alison are making out (of course, it's Barbara Crampton to first show
us her tits), while our blind dates are watching ATTACK
OF THE CRAB MONSTERS (1957) on TV (The film was directed by
Roger Corman, as a little in-joke since his name is nowhere to be
found on Wynorski's film. This film was produced by Roger's wife,
Julie Corman.). Ferdy and Alison hit it off and start kissing on a
couch in his father's furniture store. Meanwhile, the robots are
roaming the hallways of the mall, each one taking a separate floor.
The next person to die is janitor Walter Paisley (Character actor
supreme Dick Miller, who first used this name in A
BUCKET OF BLOOD [1959] and has used it in several films as a
joke when he has small roles), as a robot rolls up behind him, tips
over Walter's water bucket and electrocutes him with a 50,000 volt
taser. The robot says, "Thank you. Have a nice day." and
leaves, as Walter's body is burned beyond recognition. Leslie talks
Mike into going outside the furniture store to buy her a pack of
cigarettes from a machine (She shows him her lovely breasts an an
incentive). As he is about to buy the smokes, one of the robots
shoots a tranquilizer dart into him before snapping his neck. (When
Mike first sees the robot, he says "klaatu barada nikto"
from THE DAY THE
EARTH STOOD STILL [1952] before being murdered.). Leslie,
dressed in a blouse and panties, goes looking for Mike and finds him
with his throat slit wide open. She runs from the robot (who is
hiding in the shadows in an emergency exit cubby hole), while it
fires pink laser pulses at her, hitting her once in the shoulder. As
everyone watches in the front of the furniture store, the robot blows
Leslie's head off in one of the best head explosions ever committed
to film (I remember when I had this film on VHS, moving the tape
frame-by-frame and still couldn't spot the change from live to dummy
head, unlike the easy to spot switch in the head explosion in SCANNERS
[1981]. I still consider it one of the best head explosions in a
film.). When they realize that there are a lot more victims to be had
in the furniture store, two robots break through the glass and go
after them. The robots destroy the furniture store while firing at
the partiers, until the humans find shelter in a metal storage
closet. They have no way out until 6:00am, but the girls make it into
the air conditioning shafts to try and find a way outside. The robots
are smart enough to know what they are trying to do, so they shoot
very hot air through the ducts. The guys make it to a sporting goods
store, where they pick up shotguns and other supplies to try and
defeat the robots. They manage to destroy one robot with a
well-placed propane tank and some gunfire. It becomes too hot in the
ducts to make it down to the underground parking area, so they go
back to help their boyfriends. They grab some gasoline from some gas
cans in a store (which you would never find in any store in real life
because it is against the law), make some molitov cocktails and go
looking for their boyfriends. Seems like the robot that the guys
thought they killed isn't so dead. The molitov cocktails have no
effect on the robots and one robot burns Suzi to death with her own
gasoline. The cast retaliates by dropping one robot several stories
from an elevator. The remaining humans decide to go to the third
floor to go to the Control Room and shut down the robots, but Greg is
thrown down several levels of the mall by a robot and dies. The rest
run away from the other two robots and hide behind a metal grate. As
one of the
robots
is using a laser to cut a hole through the metal grate, the
remaining four humans must try to find a way to the Control Room, but
they need to rest first (not the best time for that). With the hole
in the metal grate complete, for some reason, one of the robots goes
out of control and kills Rick and Linda before blowing up. Ferdy and
Alison decide to split up to look for the Control Room (never a good
thing) and Alison blows up the final robot to pieces in a paint store
with a flare. Ferdy and Alison live happily ever after. And remember:
"Thank you. Have a nice day." I consider this to be
one of Jim Wynorski's best films not just because of the many cameos
(I'll let you discover some of them yourself, although there is a
quick appearance by Angus Scrimm [PHANTASM
- 1979; using the name "Lawrence Guy" here]), but because
the film doesn't let up from the get-go and the Killbots look really
good and functional (they could probably be used on malls today and
shoppers wouldn't give them a second look) and gives the film a sense
of realism, something, say, THE TERMINATOR
(1984), still can't pull off. It's not that I don't love James
Cameron's film (actually, I love it), it's just there are robots and
then there are ROBOTS. The one in all caps are the kind that we won't
see the light of days for years, but the lower case ones are already
a reality, vacuuming our floors and keeping an eye on our houses
without being told what to do. Robots today still depend on the human
element, making them subsceptable to human error (Which is why there
is a Control Room in this film), so we still have to be wary and
attentive to what we think are robots (I consider computers robots,
too, because they are able to do things quicker, faster and do things
we are unable to do). Jim Wynorski, who co-wrote the screenplay with
Steve Mitchell (who is also Second Unit Director here and wrote the
screenplay to Wynorski's AGAINST
THE LAW [1997]), throws in a lot of references to other
films and it's apparent that this film (also known under the
head-scratching title SHOPPING)
is a labor of love for him. Filmed for $800,000 at the Beverly
Centre Mall in Los Angeles, California at night under stipulation
that there would be no film equipment or messes around the mall when
it opened at 9:00am. Originally available on VHS from Lightning
Video, but since the negative for the film is in legal limbo,
Lionsgate Entertainment used the same fullscreen video master as the
Lightning tape (even using the Lightning Video logo!) and squeezed it
onto one single-sided DVD with three other horror films on the 2-disc HORROR
COLLECTION 8 MOVIE PACK (which is a shame because there are
a couple of films in their Unrated versions on this collection, such
as SLAUGHTER HIGH (1986)
and CLASS OF 1999 (1990).
Although there are a few compression artifacts (especially on my
60" plasma TV), it is watchable, but it deserves a much better
fate than this. Maybe one day those 15 minutes of cut footage will be
found and we will get to see the original KILLBOTS
version. Stranger things have happened. Also featuring Angela Aames,
Will Gill Jr., Robert Greenberg, Maurie Gallagher, Jim Wynorski as
the voices of the Killbots and a bunch of cameos I'll let you
discover (Make sure you look into the crowd scenes). A Lionsgate
Entertainment DVD Release. Now available on Blu-Ray
from Lionsgate as part of their expensive line of "Vestron Video
Collector's Series", which is stuffed with extras (such as some,
but not all, of the missing footage not incorporated into the film)
and, more important, is in its original aspect ratio. These Blu-Rays
can sell from $27.00 to $30.00 per title. Whether they are worth that
much is up to you. Rated R.
CHRISTMAS
EVIL (1980) - Ever
since Christmas Eve in 1947 when Harry (Brandon Maggart) learned
from his brother that Santa Claus wasn't real (he peeps from the
stairs and watches Mom make out with Santa), he has become obsessed
with Christmas and what it represents. It's thirty three years later
and nothing has changed. His house is decorated for Christmas, both
inside and out, all year long. He sleeps in Santa pyjamas. He spies
on the neighborhood children with binoculars to see who is naughty or
nice and puts the
bad children in a book balled "Bad Boys And Girls". Harry
even has a job in a toy factory and has just got a promotion, even if
he is not happy with the quality of the toys they manufacture or care
for the attitude of his greedy boss Frank (Joe Jamrog). When Harry
becomes stressed, he hums Christmas carols to himself and spies on
his brother Phil (Jeffrey DeMunn of THE HAUNTED -
1991). Harry pines for the life of his brother, who has a beautiful
wife (Dianne Hull of THE FIFTH FLOOR
- 1978) and two kids. Harry knows that he will never have that kind
of life because he will be unable to find anyone who will understand
his obsession. As Christmastime rapidly approaches, Harry becomes
more and more disillusioned with the way people take Christmas for
granted. After trying to teach people the true meaning of Christmas
and failing miserably, he finally snaps and adds murder to his
ever-growing list. The Santa you see standing next to you may not be
of sound mind. Also known as TERROR
IN TOYLAND and YOU BETTER WATCH OUT, director Lewis
Jackson (his only effort) films this more as a psychological tale of
a man's descent into madness rather than the horror film the ads make
it out to be. Brandon Maggart (who got his start on SESAME
STREET, believe it or not!) is wonderful as Harry, as he
makes his character sympathetic, even when he is doing creepy things
such as superglueing a fake white beard on his face so no one can
pull it off (thereby making him the real "Santa Claus") or
replacing presents under Christmas trees that he thinks are more
appropriate for the bad boys and girls. While we may think that
Christmas has become too "commercial", Harry has the balls
to do something about it (even if he does get carried away). He has
his faults, but his heart is in the right place, as the scene where
he delivers a vanload of stolen toys to a children's hospital shows
us. When he finally goes on his killing spree, all the right people
get what they deserve. He first kills three arrogant men who ridicule
him after they come out of church. He stabs one in the eye with a toy
soldier and kills the other two with axe-blows to their heads. As
with all vigilantes, he goes too far and is chased by an angry mob of
parents carrying torches (!) and ends in what has to be one of the
most whacked-out finales that you will ever see. But does it really
end the way it seems? You will have to use your ears here to really
know how it ends. It is memorable. The film also has some humorous
moments, such as the police
line-up of Santas who are forced to say "Merry
Christmas!" in their best jolly voice or the kid who says he
wants a lifetime subscription to Penthouse for Christmas. There's
precious little violence here, besides what I have already mentioned
and the death of Harry's boss by throat-slashing. This film is not
about the violence and rightly so. Most reference books rate this
film as a bomb which makes me wonder if they have watched this film
at all. This is an excellent film that chronicles one man's foray
into madness in a world that doesn't deserve a man like him. Then
again, maybe I'm just reading too much into it. Either way, I enjoyed
it immensely. This film is available in many forms. The one I viewed
was on the 10 film DVD compilation titled TALES
OF TERROR from BCI Eclipse. It's sourced from a VHS master
but it's servicable. There's also a remastered Special
Edition DVD from Synapse and a terrible DVD
from Troma as well as various VHS
incarnations. Pick one, watch it and enjoy. Also starring Mark
Margolis, Ray Barry, Sam Gray and Bobby Lesser. Watch for a cameo by
a then-unknown Patricia Richardson of TV's HOME
IMPROVEMENT (1991 - 1999). Now available in a DVD/Blu-Ray
Combo Pack from Vinegar Syndrome.
Rated R.
THE
CORPSE GRINDERS (1971) -
Director Ted V. Mikels is an acquired taste. Some people love his
films to death, while others think he's nothing but a talentless
hack. I fall somewhere in the middle, but I must confess that I find
this film to be one of my guilty pleasures. The story here is rather
straightforward and simple: The owners of Lotus Cat Food Company, Mr.
Landau (Sanford Mitchell) and Mr. Maltby
(J. Byron Foster), manage to stay in business competing with the
larger pet food companies by keeping their overhead low. Very low.
They do this by substituting their meat by-products ingredients with
the flesh of human corpses, which they obtain from grave robber Caleb
(Warren Ball) and a couple of workers at a mortuary, who supply them
with fresh bodies of the recently interred or bums whose bodies will
not be missed. As the demand rises for for their product, Landau and
Maltby have a hard time keeping up with the supply, so they begin to
rely on murder to keep them stocked with fresh meat. The only problem
is, domesticated cats eating Lotus Cat Food begin attacking their
owners and some of those owners end up dead, which attracts the
attention of Dr. Howard Glass (Sean Kenney) and his nurse/lover Angie
Robinson (Monika Kelly), who are performing the autopsies. They begin
piecing the pieces of the mystery together and discover all the
murderous cats are being fed Lotus brand cat food. They go to the FDA
to have the cat food tested and discover what the mystery ingredient
really is but, remarkably, the FDA refuses to investigate further
without more proof, so Howard and Angie go undercover to get more
proof. They are not very good at undercover espionage (they really
suck at it) and Landau and Maltby, who see through their ruse
immediately, kidnap Angie. Howard must race to rescue Angie from the
jaws of the corpse-grinding machine before she is turned into the
ingredients for a new batch of pussy chow. Howard is given a helping
hand from a mysterious stranger (whom we see stalking Landau and
Maltby at various times throughout the film) and they save Angie in
the nick of time; both Landau and Maltby end up dead, one of them
getting chewed up by their own corpse-grinding contraption. As
undoubtedly everyone already knows, this film is mostly famous for
it's chintzy corpse-grinding machine, a plywood creation with
flashing lights and levers where bodies are fed through one end (all
the bodies are still in their underwear!) and come out hamburger meat
on the other end. To me, though, that's the least interesting aspect
of this film. What I find much more entertaining are the eccentric
and downright ugly characters on view here, including beef
jerky-chewing grave robber Caleb; his doll-carrying retard wife Cleo
(Ann Noble), who treats the doll as if it was a real baby; the mute,
one-legged Tessie (Drucilla Hoy), a Lotus Cat Food employee who
hobbles around on one crutch while delivering the mail; and Willie
(Charles "Foxy" Fox), the rubber-faced, impossibly skinny
Lotus janitor who becomes the first live victim of the grinding
machine. Director/producer/editor Ted V. Mikels (THE
ASTRO ZOMBIES - 1968; BLOOD
ORGY OF THE SHE DEVILS - 1972; THE
DOLL SQUAD - 1973; and many others) uses garish lighting
schemes (bathing scenes in red and green gels), quick cutting (I
laugh every time he cut
s
to shots of Caleb's caged geese for no other reason than to hear
them squawk) and threadbare sets (the office of Lotus Cat Food is a
study in minimalism; just a desk, a couple of chairs and a cheap
hand-painted sign that reads: LOTUS CAT FOOD: "For Cats Who Like
People"!), which all together make this film seem like it was
made on some alternate version of Earth. Some people speak with a
thick Cockney accent for no reason at all and the cat attack scenes
are hilarious in their ineptitude (As the proud owners of two rescue
cats, I can assure you this is not the way cats would attack). While
there is no nudity in this film (the women walk or lay around in
their bra and panties), this impossibly cheap film does have it's
share of gruesome sights (including a graphic cat autopsy and a
basement full of body parts) and some intentionally funny scenes
(including Cleo feeding her doll soup at the dinner table). This film
is also the last credit for Arch Hall Sr. (director of the classic
badfilm EEGAH [1962] as well as
being a producer/screenwriter of many of his son's, Arch Hall Jr.,
films, such as THE CHOPPERS
[1961] and WILD GUITAR
[1962]), who co-wrote the screenplay with Joseph Cranston. To me, THE
CORPSE GRINDERS is one of those cheap independent horror
films that more than lives up to it's title and reputation. Some
people find it deadly slow, but I find it mesmerizing. Mikel made an
overlong sequel, THE CORPSE
GRINDERS II
(2000) and produced THE
CORPSE GRINDERS 3 (2012) decades later, but they are crappy
SOV shadows of the original. During the early 70's, THE
CORPSE GRINDERS played on a popular triple bill with THE
UNDERTAKER AND HIS PALS (1966) and THE
EMBALMER (1965) with a lurid ad campaign promising "The
Final Dimension In Shock!" Also starring Ray Dannis, Vince
Barbi, Harry Lovejoy, Earl Burnam, Zena Foster and Curt Matson.
Originally released on VHS by World
Video Pictures. Alpha Video
offers a widescreen print on DVD that also includes the original
trailer, a full-length commentary track by Mikels and a short
interview with Mikels, all for less than $6.00 (It's a direct port
from the more expensive DVD released by Image Entertainment a few
years earlier). Most of Mikels' films can be purchased directly from
his website: www.tedvmikels.com (no longer in operation). Rated R.
CREEPOZOIDS
(1987) - Before we get to the review, a little background about
the film and director/co-producer/co-writer David DeCoteau. This was
one of the last films to be shown as a double feature in theaters
(with SLAVE
GIRLS FROM BEYOND INFINITY - 1987) and CREEPOZOIDS
was the bottom half of the double bill but, for me, the film should
have been at the top half because it still holds a fond place in my
heart for showing what one man can do with so little money. Sure,
there are indications of an ultra-low-budget (A lab that consists of
nothing but a computer and two aquariums filled with colored water;
filming in one location; a cast of five people, etc.), but it was
just such a crazy-ass film that even Fred Olen Ray directed a remake
of the film, called HYBRID,
in 1996. And then there's David DeCoteau. He made no secret that he
was gay because he made a series of all-male porn (as well as
straight porn) films before he got into the genre filmmaking
business. He continued to make porn films while directing his first
few genre films (his first one was DREAMANIAC
in 1986 and this was his second),
but his genre career took off like no one had ever seen before (as
of 2015, he has directed over 115 genre films (not counting his porn
films), and that's not counting the hundreds of other ones he worked
on in various other capacities) and during the 80's & 90's, he
gave straight people what they wanted: naked female flesh mixed with
violence. But as gay rights began to gain steam in this country (and
it was about time), David DeCoteau formed his own production company,
Rapid Heart Pictures, and began to make homoerotic films of all types
for audiences that would appreciate them. They were (and are) never
hardcore, but they never shied away from the gay subtext, either. As
a straight man, I applaud him for that fact, but he also kept making
films for straight audiences, too. A lot of people consider David
DeCoteau a hack (don't get me wrong, he has made his share of
stinkers; but with that many films under his belt, how could he
not?), but we are talking about a man who worked since he was just a
young buck with such people as Roger Corman, Charles Band and Fred
Olen Ray and whenever I read that he is moderating or doing a running
commentary on a film, even if it's a film I don't like, I buy it on
DVD or Blu-Ray, because this is a man who knows more about filmmaking
than 99.9% of the people in the business and his commentaries are
pure gold. I have had the pleasure of communicating with David a few
times on Facebook (before I quit using the service; too many trolls)
and he has always come across as a pure gentleman and always answered
questions like he wasn't talking down to you. A person like that is
very rare commodity in the business and he should be celebrated.
Which brings us to the film at hand. There is only one thing that
really bugged me about this film: Linnea Quigley had no problems
doffing her clothes in this film, yet porn star Ashlyn Gere (here
using the name "Kim McKamy") never appeared nude. I guess
she wanted to be taken seriously as an actress, but this was the
wrong vehicle for that. People come to see films like this for the
nudity and the violence, so I tip my hat to Linnea Quigley for
spending a good amount of her screen time unclothed to make up for
McKamy staying clothed (there was one point in the film where I
thought McKamy was going to get naked when she turned the shower on,
but it was nothing but a cheat). After watching an unnamed scientist
(Joi Wilson) getting killed in her bare-bones laboratory set by a
tall creature with giant pincers around its mouth, we are informed by
on-screen computer terminal-like writing that in 1998, six years
after the superpowers have engaged in a devastating nuclear exchange,
Earth is now a blackened husk of a planet. Tiny clusters of survivors
eke out a miserable existence in the ruins of the city, and bands of
military deserters roam the barren wastelands...hiding from mutant
nomads and seeking shelter from the deadly acid rain. We then meet
five deserters: Bianca (Quigley; SILENT
NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT - 1984; also an associate producer);
Butch (Ken Abraham; BLOODY MOVIE
- 1988); Jesse (Michael Aranda; EL
CHUPACABRA - 2003), Kate (McKamy; EVIL
LAUGH - 1986) and Jake (Richard Hawkins; CLOSE
ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND - 1977), as they are trying to
find shelter from a fast approaching acid rain storm. They make it
just in time in the building that just happens to hold the lab where
we saw the lady scientist killed by the creature, so we know that
they are not alone. Since they are military deserters, they still
know how to clear a building, so they split up into two groups and
search the entire building (some of the rooms just don't look kosher
to Bianca), but all they find is a rotting head of the scientist's
assistant and nothing else. When Bianca finds a working shower, she
is ready to strip and has Butch join her. We see them both completely
naked, before and after the shower (something for both the guys and
the girls!). Jesse is using the lab's computer to try and learn what
they were working on there. Was this a military base or a private
enterprise? After trying to break into the computer's files with no
success (his access is always denied), he finds the scientist's
computer journals, where it says she was purposely cut off from
communicating with New L.A. (over 400 miles away) and she is worried
that New L.A. is in serious trouble. She mentions some new
experimental "stuff" that scares the shit out of her. If
this "stuff" is added to food, she has no idea what serious
repercussions that it will have to those who eat it. Jesse hears a
noise coming from under the desk and discovers a secret passageway,
which leads to a room that looks like it is full of giant cocoons.
While Jessie is crawling into the lair, the computer screen changes
and reads, "Long time no see. No one suspects a thing. Covered
my tracks like a pro. The blood was a bitch to clean." Jesse
enters the room and sticks his hand in a puddle of blood, before the
creature attacks him and we think Jesse is dead. But, when morning
comes, Jesse awakens from his bed like he has no memory of what
happened the night before. A shirtless Butch sleeps with a topless
Bianca when everyone is awakened for breakfast, made by Kate. Jake
wants to do a more complete recon of the building to see how long
they can stay there (food supplies, water, etc.) when Jesse begins to
scream and starts to mutate in front of everyone (the fingers on his
hands fuse together) and he spits some black liquid out of his mouth
and dies face-down into his breakfast dish. Kate then says she
believes that this building is some kind of containment vessel. It
was not meant to keep people out, but to keep something in. This
building was meant to keep the outside world safe and she believes
they are all now infected with a virus where the body produces its
own amino acids, which means they will never have to eat food again
(Jesse overdosed when he ate breakfast [no one else had the chance to
eat yet] and it not only mutated him, it killed him). Jake and Butch
go to the lair, while Bianca does some investigating on her own and
his nearly killed by the creature. Jake is found unconscious, but
when he comes to, he believes the creature doesn't want to kill
anyone. It looks like the creature was once human and wants another
person to mutate like him so they can start a new intelligent species
on Earth. The generator goes out and Butch goes to fix it, but he is
attacked by a huge mother of a rat, so Jake pulls it off Butch and
kills it with a ray gun. The creature attacks Jake (always, and I
mean always, check under your desk) when he tries to send an SOS on
the computer. The creature, which not only has pincers on the side of
its mouth but extremely huge sharp teeth, attacks Butch, so now both
Butch and Jake are out like a light while the creature destroys the
computer, knocking out all communication with the outside world. The
creature drags Butch away, but what does he really want from them (It
seems Kate's reason just doesn't wash)? Another giant rat attacks
Bianca (even crawling up the back of her shirt, but Kate pulls it off
and gets bitten in the neck. Jake shows up and patches her up. The
creature has dragged Butch into its lair, where it sprays black
liquid on Butch from its mouth. He
mutates in front of everyone's eyes when they hear him scream and
then he dies. The creature tries to attack Jake and Bianca, but they
get away. Bianca has discovered Kate has transformed into a mutant
and she tries to kill Bianca. You don't mess with Bianca unless you
want to get the horns and she kills the mutated Kate by dropping a
metal shelf on her and stepping on it hard until Kate stops
breathing. The creature brings Jake down to its lair and then kills
Bianca. Jake runs away and finds a medical kit on a shelf and puts
something into a huge hypodermic needle. After the creature nearly
kills Jake several times, Jake finally injects it with the hypodermic
needle and the creature dies, breaking into pieces. In the part of
the film people remember most about this film, one piece of the
creature delivers a mutated baby, which tries to kill Jake. Jake
thinks he chokes the baby to death with its own umbilical cord but,
as the final shot shows us, the baby gets up and the film freezes on
its image. As you can imagine, the story makes no sense at all
(DeCocteau wrote the screenplay with Burford Hauser; BLOOD
NA$TY - 1989), but it is an entertaining 72 minutes that
gave audiences what they wanted: blood, boobs and gore. This was one
of Charles Band's Empire Films (he was the uncredited Executive
Producer) and it was apparent he gave David DeCoteau very little
money and told DeCoteau to give him what audiences wanted, story be
damned, This film is just weird enough to merit a viewing (I have
seen it about 20 times) and since it was one of DeCoteau's first few
horror films (porn directors know how to squeeze every penny out of a
buck), he gives us much more on screen then some established genre
director would. The success of this film (and a few others), would
make DeCoteau a house director at Full Moon when Empire Pictures
folded, where he would have to take pseudonyms, like "Ellen
Cabot" (a credit he used on this film as an Associate Producer),
"Richard Chasen", "Julian Breen", "Mary
Crawford" , Victoria Sloan" and at least a half-dozen
others so people wouldn't think that DeCoteau was directing 80% of
Full Moon's features every year or working in so many capacities on a
film (He used the pseudonym "David McCabe" when directing
all-male and straight porn films and really is a jack-of-all trades
when it comes to filmmaking. I doubt there isn't one thing he could
do better than most artists). This film packs an awful lot into a
small amount of time and makes it one of my guiltiest of pleasures.
While David DeCoteau will never win an Academy Award for his body of
work, he has given millions of people countless nights of great genre
exploitation. David is still working up to this day, so expect to see
reviews of his films KNOCK 'EM
DEAD and 3 SCREAM QUEENS
(both 2014, which I viewed on VOD using my Roku 3 player) on this
site very soon. He sure knows how to put great actors in his
films. I recently saw his BIGFOOT
VS.
D.B. COOPER and 90210
SHARK ATTACK (also both 2014, a banner year for him) and
laughed my ass off at the absurdity of it all. It was obvious
DeCoteau was just having fun at/with the audience's expectations with
these films and it worked. I can't think of a nicer guy all this
success is happening to. Cinematographer/Second Unit Director/Special
Effects Supervisor Thomas Calloway directed the ridiculously bad film HEEBIE
JEEBIES (2012). You have to see it to believe it (Or read my
review by clicking on the link). Released on VHS by Amazing
Factory/Cult Video and even though the Full
Moon Grindhouse Collection DVD series always get a bad
reputation, besides the DVD being in fullscreen, the picture was
sharp and looked great on my Blu-Ray and HD TV system. Only their
first ten releases looked like they were taken from video masters.
Their newer releases look great, so don't let what other people say
dissuade you from purchasing the DVD. I actually paid $4.98 for it on Oldies.Com.
That is a bargain at 4 times the price. Full Moon has finally
released the film on Blu-Ray
in its original aspect ratio with 5.1 audio. That is the disc to get. Rated
R.
THE
CRIMINALS ATTACK. THE POLICE RESPOND.
(1977) - This Eurocrime film opens with the slaughter of three of
the biggest Mafia dons in Rome. They are shot with a gold-plated
automatic weapon fired by "The Prince", whose real name is
Professor Salviati (Chris Avram; THE
VIOLENT PROFESSIONALS - 1973), while they are sitting at a
table after just finishing dinner. The Prince brought them together
under the ruse that they should stop fighting each other because it
is bad for business, but what he really wanted to do was murder them
and take over their territories. Such is the life of a boss in the Mafia.
We then see a jewelry store owner being tricked into believing his
store is about to be robbed by thieves. Three police officers show up
at his locked jewelry store and the owner hands one of them the keys,
telling him and his partner to be careful. A short time later the two
officers exit the store and tell the owner that there is no one
inside and that his store has not been robbed. The third officer
tells the owner that he will have to come to the station and fill out
a report and he drives him to the station. It is at this time we
discover that they are not the police at all; they are thieves
working for crime boss Rudy (John Steiner; PLOT
OF FEAR - 1976). The owner has handed the two
"officers" the keys to his store and they rob him blind as
their partner drives him to the police station. The third
"officer" is brazen enough to actually drop off the owner
inside the police station and leave him there, unaware that his store
is being emptied of all its valuable jewelry. Yes, criminals in Rome
are getting inventive in the way they do business, as the "normal
ways" of doing business are no longer working thanks to the police.
We then meet Police Officer Baldi (Leonard Mann; DEATH
STEPS IN THE DARK - 1977), who is part of Rome's Mobile
Squad. He meets a former police officer named Rampelli (Ettore Manni; SILVER
SADDLE - 1978) at a park and he wants Baldi to head up a
special squad he is thinking of creating to fight the rampant crime
that is infecting Rome. Rampelli tells Baldi that he will have more
freedom than a normal police officer as himself will have when
dealing with criminals. Baldi is skeptical of Rampelli's claims, but
when he mentions that this new squad's goal is to stop three of
Rome's worst criminals, namely The Owl, Rudy and The Messino, who are
controlled by The Prince (we are only introduced to Rudy and The
Prince in this film), it gets Baldi's attention. Rampelli tells Baldi
that he has no proof that The Prince is behind most of the crimes
since he is considered "above suspicion" by law enforcement
and the judicial system. It also doesn't help that no one even likes
to mention The Prince's name, in fear that they will be murdered for
doing so. Baldi tells Rampelli that he will have to think about
heading up this new special squad since it could get him fired (or
worse) from his job, so Rampelli grabs a pen from Baldi's jacket
pocket (Baldi tells him not to use that pen and gives him a
"better" one) and writes down his phone number on a
business card and hands it to him, saying when he comes to a decision
to call him. Baldi is sick and tired of Italy's justice system and
looks at this secret squad as a way for him to get justice his way,
but joining such a squad could have severe consequences, so he has
Rampelli secretly assist him with his investigation to see if he is
up to snuff to create such a squad.
We then see Rudy with the three jewelry store thieves, as he
introduces them to "The Master" (Dante Cleri; FIGHTING
FIST OF SHANGHAI JOE - 1973), who decides the percentage of
the haul from robberies everyone gets, from the Mafia bosses right
down to even the most insignificant of people who were hardly
involved in the crimes. Since The Prince sets the prices of hauls, it
upsets the three thieves, because he lowballs the prices on stolen
goods, giving them a lower amount of money than they actually deserve
(and The Prince pocketing the rest).
Baldi then goes undercover as a thief to set up Rudy. While they
haggle over prices for weapons at an outdoor café, Rudy
notices a funeral procession slowly driving by and become suspicious.
Turns out he was right and the procession is staffed by undercover
cops. Baldi tells Rudy he is under arrest and a gunfight breaks out
between the cops and Rudy's gang and Rudy manages to escape unharmed.
Baldi doesn't know Rampelli is crooked as a corkscrew, as he is
feeding Rudy vital information, keeping him one step ahead of the
police. Rudy orders Rampelli to find out who set him up with the
police, promising Rampelli a hefty reward for doing so. Baldi then
meets the beautiful wheelchair-bound Laura Olivieri (Maria Rosaria
Omaggio; ROME: ARMED TO THE TEETH
- 1976), whose father was murdered by The Prince. Laura returned to
Rome after her father was murdered and moved into his opulent home in
hope of finding out who killed her father. We can see a romance
beginning to bloom between Baldi and Laura, but whom did she call on
the phone when Baldi leaves her house for the first time?
Rampelli secretly meets Rudy at a restaurant and sits a few tables
away from him, pulling the skin around his eyes back tightly with his
fingers, identifying "The Chinaman" (Thomas Rudy; THE
STRANGER'S GUNDOWN - 1969) as the person who set him up (Ah,
the old "slant eyes" routine!). Rudy and his goons drive
The Chinaman to a remote location, where they piss on him (!), beat
him up and then shoot and kill him. It is revealed to the audience
that The Chinaman was not the man who set up Rudy (it was actually
Rampelli) and Rampelli lied just to get the hefty reward, but Rudy is
unaware of that.
Baldi's sister, Irene (Liana Trouche; LOVE
ANGELS - 1974), finds that the home they share has been
ransacked and their dog's dead body has been stuffed in the
refrigerator. Irene tells her brother that she saw a strange man
skulking around their property earlier in the morning. All she can
remember about him is that he wore a yellow, orange and
blue-checkered sports jacket and he had blonde hair, which could have
been a wig. So, do you think you know who it is? Not so fast, I have
more to tell you!
It turns out Laura is good friends with Professor Salviati and
doesn't know about him being The Prince. He considers her the
daughter he never had, but Laura has no idea it was he who murdered
her father. Some higher-up Mafia dons tell The Prince that Rudy is
getting out of hand and his actions could get them all sent to
prison. The Prince tells them that he will take care of Rudy the
"old fashioned way." Three men in ski masks beat up Baldi
when he pays a nighttime visit to Laura's home. Baldi doesn't see
their faces, but one of the men is dressed exactly the same as the
man Irene described as skulking around their home. Baldi has Rudy
brought to his office on trumped-up charges and asks him, "Did
you ever see a beetle die? They'll do the same thing as you. You're
good for the little jobs...Low risk...Preying on people who can't
defend themselves. You know what I mean." He then asks Rudy if
he owns a yellow, orange and blue checkered sports jacket and Rudy
says yes, he has many of them, wanting to know if it is illegal to
own them. Yes, Rudy is a smartass.
Rudy figures out that Rampelli is working both sides of the fence,
so he kidnaps him and locks him in a room. The Prince sends some of
his men to tell Rudy that he wants peace, but first he is to deliver
Rampelli to him and then they will have dinner together as a peace
offering. Rudy isn't stupid and instantly doesn't trust The Prince,
so he forces Rampelli to phone Baldi and tell him to meet him, he has
some important information to tell him. When Baldi shows up at the
meeting place, Rampelli gets a flash of conscience and tells Baldi to
hit the dirt, it's a set-up. Baldi does just that, but Rudy's men
shoot Rampelli in the back and kill him. Rudy then goes to The
Prince's house for dinner and, just like in the beginning of the
film, The Prince pulls out his gold-plated automatic weapon and
shoots Rudy, killing him (Rudy's final words are, "You really
are a son of a bitch!"). Baldi then gets a phone call, telling
him "a friend" is waiting for him in a building he knows
well. When Baldi gets there, he finds Rudy dead on the floor and
written in paint next to his body is a note that reads "The
Friends Are Vindicated." Rudy is now wearing the yellow, orange
and blue checkered sports jacket, but is he really the one who
ransacked Baldi's home and killed his dog? Inside the jacket pocket
is a photo of Rudy posing with the bodies of the three dead Mafia
dons, as if to point the finger at Rudy as their killer. Baldi thinks
the photo is strange because Rudy was not the type of man who would
pose for a photo with dead bodies. He is obviously right, as the real
killer is stalking Laura in her home as she tries to pull her
lifeless lower body up a flight of stairs to avoid the approaching
killer. Will Baldi be able to save his new lady love? We then
discover a surprise or two and if I told you what they were
(especially why Baldi keeps two pens in his jacket) it would ruin
your enjoyment of the film should you choose to watch it (And, no,
Laura cannot walk!).
This was one of director/co-writer (with Paolo Barberio; THE
BEST - 1976) Mario Caiano's final theatrical films, as he
moved to television shortly after this, directing many TV movies and
mini-series during the '80s & '90s, right up to his death at age
82 in 2015 (he was also one of the many fired directors of VAMPIRE
IN VENICE - 1988). I have always been a fan of Caiano's
work, including NIGHTMARE
CASTLE (1965); EYE
IN THE LABYRINTH (1972); THE
MANIAC RESPONSIBLE (1975); BLOODY
PAYROLL (1976; also with Steiner) and WEAPONS
OF DEATH (1976; also starring
Leonard Mann). This is a very slow-moving Eurocrime flick with very
few action scenes, but it is never boring, thanks to John Steiner's
performance (I don't know about you, but Steiner gives off a very
strong gay vibe whenever I see him on screen, causing my
"gaydar" to go off repeatedly, but, hey, there's nothing
wrong with that! I do have some gay friends and they taught me how to
spot a gay person in a crowd. Steiner meets all those criteria. No
matter what I think, there's no denying that Steiner is fun to watch
on screen.), and the film's insistence that the story is more
important than action. That doesn't mean there is no violence here;
as the threat of violence permeates nearly every frame of film. You
never know who is the next to die, which is this film's strongest
point. Italy, especially Rome, was infested with crime and violent
murders throughout the '70s and this film is a window that shows us
how bad it really was and how criminals used new and inventive ways
(such as the jewelry store robbery) to obtain their goals. It wasn't
unheard of back then for the police to be involved in criminal
activities, as many prominent law officials were on the take to Mafia
dons, making it downright impossible for honest cops, such as Baldi,
to do their jobs. And the justice system in Italy at the time was
just as bad, if not worse, as judges and court officials were also
getting paid graft by the Mafia, throwing cases and perverting
justice for monetary gain, making it impossible for honest cops to
put criminals and murderers in prison. It wasn't unheard of for
honest cops to murder their prey because it was the only way for them
to get justice. This film shines a light on that problem and I
therefore recommend it. Just don't expect a slam-bang actioner and
you may enjoy yourself.
Filmed as LA
MALAVITA ATTACCA. LA POLIZIA RISPONDE. (a literal
translation of the review title), this film was basically unheard of
in the United States, as it didn't obtain a theatrical or legitimate
home video release in any format in the States. Right now, the only
way to see it is to purchase it on DVD-R from many online gray market
sites or to watch it streaming on YouTube from user
"Film&Clips", who offer a rather nice anamorphic
widescreen print in Italian with easy-to-read yellow English
subtitles. Also featuring Franco Ressel (MAGNUM
COP - 1978), Corrado Gaipa (EXECUTION
SQUAD - 1972), Lorenzo Piani (ALMOST
HUMAN - 1974), Adriano Migliano (SMILING
MANIACS - 1975), Sergio Mioni (THE
BLOODSTAINED SHADOW - 1978), Franco Beltramme (PLAY
MOTEL - 1979) and Edmondo Tieghi (DUCK,
YOU SUCKER - 1971) as "Biondi". If I told you what
that translates to, it will also ruin your enjoyment of the film. Not
Rated.
DEATHDREAM
(1972) -
This is an absolute must for any horror fan. Director Bob Clark (who
also gave us CHILDREN
SHOULDN'T
PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS
[1972], BLACK CHRISTMAS
[1974] and MURDER BY DECREE
[1979] before giving up on horror and giving us PORKY'S
[1982], PORKY'S II: THE
NEXT DAY (1983; He did not direct PORKY'S
REVENGE - 1985, the final film in the trilogy), the
Christmas perrennial A
CHRISTMAS STORY [1983] and the truly abysmal LOOSE
CANNONS [1990]), has fashioned what is probably one of the
best psychological horror/gore films of the 1970's. When Andy Brooks
(Richard Backus) is shot and killed in Vietnam, the Brooks family is
notified by the Army of his demise. Andy's overly-devoted mother,
Christine (Lynn Carlin) refuses to believe her son is dead and wishes
for his return home. Her wish comes true as Andy shows up at their
door, not quite acting himself. He has in fact turned into an undead
zombie that needs the blood of the living to keep him from rotting
away. Andy's alcoholic father, Charles (John Marley) knows something
is wrong with Andy after he witnesses him killing the family dog in
front of a bunch of children (a truly horrifying scene). Andy's
sister, Cathy (Anya Ormsby, wife of screenwriter Alan Ormsby) is just
glad that he is home, even if Mother always liked him best. Charles
brings the family doctor (Henderson Forsythe) to check Andy out, but
Andy refuses and later shows up at the good doctor's office and kills
him by stabbing him repeatedly with a hypodermic needle, injecting
the doctor's blood into his veins to stave off the decomposition of
his flesh. Things really get out of hand when Cathy sets up Andy on a
double date with his old girlfriend Joanne (Jane Daly) and Cathy's
boyfriend Bob (Michael Mazes). They go to a drive-in and Andy kills
Joanne and Bob, runs over an innocent bystander and drives home to
Mother as he begins to literally fall apart. Charles tries to kill
Andy with a pistol, but cannot do it because he's still his son and
uses the gun on himself instead, committing suicide. Mom drives Andy
to get away with the police in hot pursuit. Andy makes her stop at a
cemetery, where earlier he dug a grave and scratched his name on a
tombstone with his name, birth date and death date. He literally
throws dirt on himself before passing away, his flesh peeling away
from his body. There's a lot of subtext in this film concerning the
Vietnam war that would be lost on audiences today. That's OK, because
the film holds up as a truly frightening horror film with good
performances by all, some early gore effects by Tom Savini and the
last 20 minutes are the best twenty minutes of any horror film of
its' time. The scene where Joanne discovers Andy's forehead beginning
to blister open and drip yellow goo while trapped in the back seat of
a car at the drive-in is a scene you're likely to never forget and
Andy's final decomposition is handled for pure shock value. Many
people find the first hour of this film slow going, but I think that
director Clark and screenwriter Ormsby build the suspense to the
breaking point before all hell breaks loose. Drastically cut when
shown on TV in the 70's, you'll be surprised how much you missed when
viewing the videotape. This is one of those films known under a
myriad of titles, including: THE NIGHT ANDY CAME HOME, DEAD
OF NIGHT, THE VETERAN, WHISPERS and its
original shooting title, NIGHT WALK. Under any title, DEATHDREAM
is a great ride for people who like to be scared. A Gorgon
Video/MPI Home Video Release. There are various versions out
there from a PG-Rated television cut to the Gorgon Release
which seems to be uncut except for a snippet of dialogue by Andy's
mother at his gravesite in the finale. This version is Unrated
and contains a scene where we see a person run over as well as a
scene of a policeman slamming into a telephone pole after falling off
a car. It's also available on DVD
from Blue Underground.
It's hard to believe that director Bob Clark turned out pablum such
as BABY GENIUSES (1999)
and its sequel BABY
GENIUSES 2: SUPERBABIES (2003) before being killed (along
with his son) by a drunk driver in 2007 in a head-on car collision.
At least he Executive Produced the above-average BLACK
CHRISTMAS remake (2006) before he passed away.
DEATHMASTER
(1972) - This
is one of those films that played incessantly on TV during the 70's and
early 80's and then disappeared into obscurity. That is, until now.
Retromedia Entertainment now offers a deluxe wide screen edition of
this title, the first ever "legal" home video edition
available in the United States. Put away your old, dupey copies and
watch the film like you have never seen it before. A coffin washes
ashore containing the body of Khorda (Robert Quarry), a centuries-old
vampire. Khorda's henchman, the mute Barbado (Le Sesne Hilton),
brings Khorda to the local hippie commune. Khorda quickly becomes the
commune's spiritual leader, spouting philosophical mumbo-jumbo and
performing magical acts that put a sense of awe and wonder into the
commune's long-haired occupants. Khorda begins putting the bite on
the commune's residents, turning them into crazed, bongo-dancing
vampires. The disappearances and strange behaviour of some of the
commune's population bring out the suspicions of Pico (Bill Ewing),
the local Indian hippie who has the moves of Billy Jack. With his
girlfriend, Rona (Brenda Dickson), they try to escape the commune,
only to be stopped at every turn by Barbado and
a growing horde of vampires. After they are captured, Pico refuses
Khorda's offer to become a vampire and escapes his shackles in the
commune's subterranean basement. He finds Khorda's resting place and
accidentally sticks his hand in a bowl of leeches. He disables
Barbado by drawing a cross on his face with his leech-drained blood
and escapes to town where he seeks the help of Pop (John Fiedler),
the local store owner. Pop doesn't believe Pico's story, even when
his dog is found dead with two puncture wounds on his neck. Pop
becomes hip when the local motorcycle tough is found dead and members
of the commune act like zombies in his store. Pico and Pop bring the
police to the commune, where Khorda convinces the cops that nothing
is wrong. Rona, under Khorda's control, refuses to leave the commune.
It's up to Pico and Pop to stop Khorda before the "incubation
time" expires and everyone at the commune become full-fledged
vampires. Be prepared for a real downbeat ending. Robert Quarry, just
off the successes of COUNT
YORGA, VAMPIRE (1970) and THE
RETURN OF COUNT YORGA (1971), returns for a third helping
(he was Associate Producer of this one) as a vampire. He plays Khorda
as part Charles Manson, part New-Age healer and part menacing
vampire. At the time this was made it was quite fresh, but today the
concept seems dated. It's still entertaining and has many fine
qualities. This is a pristine print, enhanced for 16x9 viewing, and I
doubt you'll ever see such a beautiful copy of such an obscure film
in quite a while. The colors pop and I swear you can see the pores on
Quarry's face. While not overtly violent, the film picks up during
the latter half and has an "oops" staking scene that
reminded me of a similar one in BLACULA,
filmed the same year. This is perhaps director Ray Danton's finest
effort, which included the dreadful CRYPT
OF THE LIVING DEAD (1973) and the unusual PSYCHIC
KILLER (1974). Danton died in 1992. Robert
Quarry is still making films today, usually appearing in small
roles in movies by Fred Olen Ray (who owns Retromedia Entertainment)
such as THE SHOOTER (1997) and FUGITIVE
MIND (1999). Some extras on the DVD include:
behind-the-scenes photos of the film (a photo with a clapboard shows
the film was shot with the title "Guru Vampire"); TV
commercials including a Lucky Strike cigarette ad starring Quarry, a
Shasta soda commercial starring John Fiedler (the voice of Piglet on
all the Winnie the Pooh cartoons) and Frankenstein's monster and TV
spots for COUNT YORGA
and SUGAR HILL (1974), both
featuring Quarry. For any Baby Boomer with fond memories of watching
this film late at night on TV during their youth, or for anyone
interested in horror and hippies, this DVD of DEATHMASTER
is a must for their collection. This is one childhood memory that
lived up to my adult expectations. Also starring Betty Anne Rees and
William Jordan as the motocycle tough who leaves the commune to get a
"steak and beer" dinner only to come back and be scared to
death by Khorda! A Retromedia Entertainment
DVD Release. Not Rated but the film was rated PG on
its' initial release. Note: Robert Quarry died in 2009 of a
heart condition. His death barely caused a blip in the newspapers or
the Press, which just proves how elitist we are becoming as a
society. It makes me sick to my stomach.
DEEP
RED (1975) - There is no doubt in
my mind that Dario Argento was the master of the giallo film during
the '70s & '80s. This film is considered his crowning achievement
(even though I like TENEBRE
[1982] better) and it is easy to see why. It is a masterwork of
visual delights, mixing some sly comic moments with graphic scenes of
death. It is also one of Argento's better-acted films, helped in part
by David Hemmings (NIGHTMARE
- 1973) and Daria Nicolodi's (SHOCK
- 1977) natural on-screen chemistry. Before I get into the plot of
this film, there are a couple of things you should know. First
off, when Argento directed this film,
there was no such thing as home video, so when the first murder
happens, there is a quick flash of the killer's face, which can
easily be seen when advancing the film frame-by-frame in slow motion
and freezing the frame when advancing the disc in a DVD or Blu-Ray
player. I would advise you don't do this, especially if you have
never seen the film before, because it will destroy the film for you.
Secondly, if you want to see the on-screen chemistry between Hemmings
and Nicolodi, you'll have to watch the complete 126-minute
"Director's Cut" of the film, as the 105-minute English
language cut deletes most of the romantic wordplay and sexual energy
between them (but not the film's gory violence). Even worse is the
100-minute U.S. theatrical R-Rated cut, which not only omits that
chemistry, it also is missing most of the graphic gore and deaths,
something Argento is a master at. The 100-minute version is a
complete joke, so please ignore it, as it is only a shadow of a great
giallo film. With that out of the way, let's get to the film.
The film opens with some creepy children's music playing, as we see
and hear a murder take place (in silhouette, as shadows on a wall) in
a room of a house (notice the Christmas tree on the right). We hear a
scream and a bloody knife falls to the floor and a faceless young
child walks up to it (we only see the child's shoes). We are then at
a parapsychology conference, where Professor Giordini (Glauco Mauri)
and Mr. Bardi (Piero Mazzinghi; APACHE
WOMAN - 1976) introduce world-renown psychic medium Helga
Ulmann (Macha Meril; NIGHT
TRAIN MURDERS - 1974) to their audience of doctors,
scientists and naysayers. Helga tells them she can see thoughts the
instant they are formed and some thoughts are so strong, "they
linger around the room, like cobwebs." She proves it
by telling one member of the audience that he is holding keys in his
hand and even tells him his name, even though they have never met.
Suddenly, Helga picks up some very violent thoughts, telling someone
in the audience, "I can feel...death in
this room. I feel a presence. A twisted mind, sending thoughts.
Perverted, murderous thoughts. Go away! You have killed...and you
will kill again. There is a child, singing, in that house.
Death...Blood...All blood! I'm scared! I'm scared! We must hide
everything, everything in the house back the way it was. No one must
know, no one, no one! Forget it, forget it, forget it...forever...forever."
We see an audience member's point of view as they get up and leave
the auditorium while Helga expresses these violent thoughts she is
picking up. When Helga comes to, she tells Professor Giordini that
she has to go home and write down what she experienced, telling the
Professor that she now knows the name of the monstrous murderer and
she will tell him all about it tomorrow morning, not knowing that the
murderer is hiding in the auditorium and has heard everything Helga
has said (earlier, we see the murderer walking into the auditorium
bathroom and putting on a pair of black leather gloves that zip-up in
the back). Helen does sense something, but she believes the strong,
murderous thoughts are still lingering in the room. That night, Helga
is talking on the phone to her agent when she hears the creepy
children's music and someone rings her doorbell. She goes to open her
door to her lush apartment, but those strange thoughts envelop her
and she backs away from the door, only to have the killer kick the
door open and attack Helga with a butcher's cleaver (lots of quick
flashes of blood and gore). The killer takes Helga's notes and the
film cuts to jazz pianist teacher Marcus Daly (David Hemmings; DARK
FORCES - 1980) meeting his drunken pianist friend Carlo
(Gabriele Lavia; BEYOND
THE DOOR - 1974) on the street as he is walking home (he
lives in the same apartment building as Helga). As they are talking,
they hear a woman screaming and a drunk Carlo tells Marcus that
someone is probably getting raped, making a joke out of it (like any
drunk would, raising his bottle of booze in the air and saying, "Hail
to the raped virgin!"). Carlo tells Marcus "As
long as I'm drunk, I'm happy as a lark. And I play better, too! The
difference between you and me is purely political. You see, we both
play good piano, right? (Marco waves his hands back and
forth, as if to say, "Not really.")
But I'm the proletarian of the keyboard and you're the bourgeois. You
play for art and you enjoy it. I play for survival. That's not the
same thing." Carlo then leaves to go to his job as a
pianist at a blues bar. As Marcus continues walking home, he sees
Helga getting her face pushed through one of her windows (an Argento
trademark) and then sees someone plant the cleaver in her back.
Marcus runs to her apartment, passing a corridor in her apartment
full of paintings (DO NOT advance this sequence frame-by-frame if you
do not want to know who the killer is!) and finds Helga dead, her
neck impaled on shards of glass. Marcus runs to the window and sees
someone wearing a long brown leather raincoat hurriedly walking away.
When the police arrive, Marcus tells Captain Calcabrini (Eros Pagni)
about seeing a person in a brown leather raincoat walking away, yet
when he walks past the corridor again, he gets the feeling that
something is missing, thinking it is a painting (like in most of
Argento's giallo films, memory is key to uncovering the mystery). The
Captain tells Marcus that no paintings are missing, but Marcus is
sure something is not the same and it will haunt him to the point
that he will try to solve this murder on his own. Also at the scene
of the crime is feisty newspaper reporter Gianna Brezzi (Daria
Nicolodi; Argento's OPERA
- 1987), who latches on to Marcus as a source for the story and will
not let go (almost literally). When Marcus leaves the apartment, he
sees Carlo and asks him if he saw someone wearing a brown coat
walking away and he tells Marcus, "You
know, sometimes what you actually see and what you imagine...get
mixed up in your memory like a cocktail...from which you can no
longer distinguish one flavor from another. It happens to me all the time."
Those words give the usually insecure Marcus the impetus to solve the
murder on his own, but he will get help from the inquisitive Gianni,
who has the know-how and contacts to get things done quicker than he
could on his own. At Helga's Hebrew funeral, Gianna give Marcus the
skinny on Professor Giordani, telling him that he's a professor of
psychiatry, but he's mad about parapsychology. Giordani and Helga
were much more than friends, telling Marcus that Giordani practically
kept Helga. She also tells Marcus about Mr. Bardi. He is an expert in
paranormal phenomena and is also a clairvoyant.
Marcus is certain that Carlo is not telling him all he knows, so he
goes to Carlo's home, only to discover that he lives with his ditzy
mother Martha (Clara Calamai; OBSESSION
- 1943), a former actress who has pictures of herself hanging on a
wall (Actual photos of actress Calamai in the films she starred in
the '30s & '40s). Marcus also discovers that Carlo is gay
(Handled in a manner that is deeply touching for a giallo film. In
other words, Marcus doesn't treat him like some pervert, but still
like a friend), but it doesn't deter him from asking some important
questions. While Marcus is working on a new piano composition in his
apartment, he starts hearing the children's music and quickly locks
the door to his piano room. The killer whispers from behind the
locked door, "This time you're safe. I'll
kill you anyway, sooner or later." Marcus becomes
obsessed with that
child's tune and finds a record of it in a music store. He plays it
for Professor Giordani and Mr. Bardi and Giordani tells Marcus that
the song may very well be the leitmotif of the crimes. "The
murderer is a schizophrenic paranoid. Anyone who kills with such
frenzy surely does it in a state of temporary madness. In everyday
life, this person could appear quite normal. As normal as you or I or
anyone else. And when he kills he must recreate these specific
conditions, which will trigger the release of all his pent-up
madness. Something that recreates the same images that frame a
context that provoked trauma in the past" (Remember,
Giordani is a psychiatrist). Mr. Bardi interjects and says, "I'd
like to add something less scientific to this business about the
children's song. If you recall, Helga also mentioned a house, as well
as a child singing. I remember having read a little book quite some
time ago on folklore. I think the title was 'The Modern Ghost And The
Black Legends Of Today'. The author spoke about a haunted house from
which neighbors could sometimes hear singing, like that of a child.
The conjecture is that an act of bloodshed was once committed in that house."
Marcus asks Mr. Bardi if he still has the book and he says no, but if
Marcus wants to find it, he should try The Library Of Folklore And
Popular Traditions.
Marcus finds the book and the author's name is Amanda Righetti. The
book contains a photo of a house and Marcus (who rips the page out of
the book while the library's guard is not looking) begins an
investigation to locate the house, his first step being contacting
Amanda Righetti. Marcus phones Gianna at a coffee bar (a very funny
scene) and asks her to find an address for Righetti, telling Gianna
that Amanda must know where the house is located. We then see that
Amanda Righetti (Giuliana Calandra; CONVOY
BUDDIES - 1975) is a collector of myna birds (!) and before
she can talk to Marcus, the killer leaves a naked doll hanging by its
neck in her home and then kills her by immersing her head in a
bathtub full of scalding hot water, but before she dies, she writes
something in the steam that has collected on the wall. Marcus then
arrives at her house and finds Amanda dead, along with all her myna
birds (Remember, these birds can talk!). Marcus leaves the house
without telling the police (being the first person at two murder
scenes is just too much for the police to overlook), but Professor
Giordani offers to go to the house to investigate further, especially
when Marcus tells him about Amanda pointing at the wall, as if she
was trying to say something. Giordani discovers what Amanda has
written by running the hot water taps in the bathroom and steaming up
the walls, but before he can tell Marcus what she had written (It
reads "It Was...", but we
don't see the rest of the message), the killer strikes and bashes
Giordani's teeth against the edge of a fireplace mantle and his a
desk over and over (much in the way as the hard-to-watch curbside
death in AMERICAN HISTORY X
- 1998) and then stabbing him through the neck, pinning him to the
desk, a pool of blood slowly forming on the floor (This comes after a
nerve-wracking scene of a mechanical doll rapidly approaching
Giordani through a door in his office. It doesn't make much sense,
but there's no denying that it is an effective, scary scene).
Marcus tells Gianna that he is not going to tell anyone (not even
her) his next move, asking Gianna how the killer knew he was going to
talk to Amanda. Marcus notices some strange foliage in the photo of
the house and a florist tells him it's a rare plant only found on the
Easter Islands, but one house nearby purchased it years ago. It leads
Marcus to "The House Of The Screaming Child". He also
notices something else in the photo: A window in the house that is no
longer there. Long story short, it leads Marcus to a secret hidden
room, containing the desiccated corpse of the murder victim from the
beginning of the film. Before Marcus can investigate any further, he
is knocked out and when he wakes up, Gianna is beside him and the
house is in flames (an obvious model of the house). Marcus still has
one final clue. It's a child's drawing depicting a murder that leads
him to the archives of a school, where he discovers the child's name
who drew it in the mid-1950s. Marcus believes he has the identity of
the killer, but he is in for a rude awakening. I'm not about to tell
you who the killer is (although they are mentioned in this review),
but the way the killer is dispatched will come as quite the gory
surprise to those who have only seen the abortive 100-minute edit of
this film.
This may be Dario Argento's most visual film of his career, as the
camera (cinematography by Luigi Kuveiller; strangely, his only film
for Argento; he did the cinematography on Elio Petri's A
QUIET PLACE IN THE COUNTRY [1968]; Lucio Fulci's A
LIZARD IN A WOMAN'S SKIN [1971]; and Lamberto Bava's BODY
PUZZLE [1992]) becomes a character unto itself. It glides
over children's toys on a desktop, surprising us by then displaying
murder weapons among the toys (including two switchblades with dried
blood on the blades). It shows us the miniature tape recorder as it
plays the haunting children's tune (music by Giorgio Gaslini and
Goblin; BEYOND
THE DARKNESS - 1979; this being their first music score for
Argento; they would also supply music for his PHENOMENA
[1984] and SLEEPLESS [2001])
and it glides across scenes like a low-flying cloud, giving the film
a dreamy (or rather, nightmarish) quality lacking from most giallo
films. There's no denying that Argento gets what he wants in a scene,
because it is easy to see that many of the shots were well
thought-out and achieved with plenty of sweat and imagination
(especially how the camera glides across Marcus at the end of the
film, as he is about to re-enter Helga's apartment). Like I said
earlier, the walking mechanical doll may not make a lot of sense, but
there's no disputing that it has a visceral energy that slaps the
viewer across the face. Rather than making us mad, it actually shocks
us. While I prefer the 105-minute cut of the film (maybe it's because
it was the only version I saw before the full version was released on
DVD & Blu-Ray, but more on that in the next paragraph), the
126-minute version does answer some nagging questions I always had
with the film, like how Marcus knew the House With The Screaming
Child contained plants indigenous to The Easter Islands (or how he
knew about the plants and the house at all) and other reveals, which
made no sense in the 105-minute version, but are cleared up in the
126-minute version. If you have never seen this film before, I would
advise that you watch the most complete version so you won't have any
questions when the film ends. This film also has some sublimely comic
scenes, such as Gianni's junker of a car (and how Marcus and Gianna
get out of it), what happens when Marcus tells Gianna that women are
the "weaker" sex (They get into an arm wrestling contest
and Gianna wins...twice!) and the way Martha keeps forgetting that
Marcus is a pianist, referring to him over-and-over as an engineer. Those
who think that Argento lacks a sense of humor should check this film
out. The screenplay, by Argento and Bernardino Zapponi (PLOT
OF FEAR - 1976), is full of little humorous asides,
especially in the 126-minute version. This version contains a scene
in the beginning when Marcus is teaching jazz to some students. He
tells them they are playing extremely well, but jazz shouldn't be
played "clean", it should be played "trashy", a
telling moment about Marcus' frame of mind. The film is also full of
nasty, gory violence. One scene I failed to mention is one character
getting dragged behind a truck while attached to a chain. As the
truck makes a sharp turn, his head smashes against a curb and a car
runs over his head, crushing it like a grape. The cleaver attacks are
also very gory, as is the killer's demise. Blood flows like a fine
bottle of wine, leaving red puddles everywhere (especially in the
closing shot). Need I say any more?
Filmed as PROFONDO ROSSO
(a literal translation of the review title), this film was released theatrically
in the United States by Howard
Mahler Films in 1976 in the crappy R-Rated 100-minute version,
which then made its way on VHS in the mid-'80s from HBO
Video under the title DEEP
RED - HATCHET MURDERS. This 100-minute version found it way
to the Public Domain (PD), where it appeared in many DVD
compilations, such as Mill Creek Entertainment's CHILLING
CLASSICS 50 MOVIE PACK. We would have to wait until 2000 to
see the complete 126-minute version, when Anchor Bay Entertainment
released it on VHS & DVD.
In 2007, Blue Underground
released both the 105-minute
and 126-minute
versions on separate DVDs, with a Blu-Ray
containing both versions in 2011. This review is based on the
beautiful Blu-Ray
released by Arrow Video in
2018, a 4K scan of the 126-minute version that looks ridiculously
pristine (it actually runs a little over 127 minutes), like it was
shot yesterday. It also contains a bonanza of extras, something that
Arrow is known for, including a visit to Argento's Profondo Rosso
shop in Rome, our tour guide being Luigi Cozzi (STARCRASH
- 1978), who is Argento's partner in the store. If you want to see
the film the way Argento prefers you view it, this Blu-Ray is the
only way to go. Sure, it is a little expensive (most Arrow titles
are), but you'll be happy you have it as part of your film library.
Also featuring Aldo Bonamano (SMILING
MANIACS - 1975), Liana Del Bazo (CROSS
CURRENT - 1971), Vittorio Fanfoni (EYEBALL
- 1975), Jacopo Mariani (Argento's SUSPIRIA
- 1977), cameo king Tom Felleghy (DAMNED
IN VENICE - 1978), Fulvio Mingozzi (TRAGIC
CEREMONY - 1972) and Nicoletta Elmi (WHO
SAW HER DIE? - 1972) as twisted little girl Olga, who likes
to stick pins in lizards (It disgusted some viewers and critics, even
though Argento has gone on record saying it was a special effect and
no lizards were harmed. I seem to remember a close-up of the lizard
with a pin in its head, but it is missing from Arrow's Blu-Ray, only
showing the twitching lizard in a medium shot.). Not Rated.
THE
DEMON (1963) - "The
producer would like to thank Professor Ernesto De Martino at the
University of Cagliari, whose funding made possible our ethnological
studies in the south of Italy. This film is based on a recent and
tragic true story. The rites, the spells and the demonic possessions
you will see are scientifically verifiable and are a fact of life in
Italy, just as they are anywhere else in the world. This is the story
of Purificazione, a girl possessed by magic. A story that transpired
during our time in Lucania." - On-screen narration
(in Italian) that opens the film.
This stark, but eerily beautiful, black & white film then shows
Purificazione (Daliah Lavi; THE
WHIP AND THE BODY - 1963), whom everyone calls
"Puri" (so I will, too), sticking a pin in her right breast
and dabbing the blood with a white cloth. She then cuts some locks of
her black hair off with scissors and wraps them in the bloody cloth.
She then goes to an old wood burning stove in the kitchen and places
the bloody cloth in the embers of the fire. She sits and waits for
about a minute, opens the stove's iron door and retrieves the burnt
remnants of the bloody cloth, puts them on the kitchen table and
mashes the remnants together with her hands into the shape of a ball,
but she is interrupted when she hears her mother yell to her father
Vincenzo to wake up the boys, bedtime is over, forcing Puri to hide
the ball in a small loaf of bread. Vincenzo yells out for Puri,
wondering why she is not in her room. The scissors then fall to the
floor, one of its blades sticking in the floor in the shape of a
makeshift crucifix, but Puri grabs the scissors and puts it to her
face, staring intensely through the holes in the handles into the
nothingness, the scissors acting like some strange mask. I think we
can guess what she is trying to do, as some may call her insane or
mentally disturbed, but it may not be that at all (or it could very
well be). Is it possible that Puri may be in the early stages of
demonic possession or is there a more rational explanation? Puri then
takes the loaf of bread, dresses all in black, walks outside and
enters the local church, while the townspeople inside begin
whispering to each other, "What little shame she has. How dare
she come to the church." (They think she is a witch). Puri walks
over to the priest performing Mass, kneels before him, clutching the
loaf of bread tightly in her hands, but when the priest sees her, he
turns his back on her and refuses to give her Communion. Puri says,
"Blood of Christ. Demon. A curse upon this man. A curse that he
will never forget me. Blood of my body. Until the grave. A curse that
he will never forget me." The people kneeling beside her are
visibly shaken and horrified. Is Puri cursing the priest? We will
soon find out.
The next time we see Puri, she is walking home, but she stops to spy
on Antonio (Frank Wolff; DEATH
WALKS ON HIGH HEELS - 1971), who is petting a dog. Puri has
a look of lust in her eyes and follows Antonio as he walks away,
keeping her distance so he doesn't notice her (When Antonio takes a
drink from his canteen, we see Puri licking her lips. I think that
tells us more than words could ever imply). Antonio walks down a
steep hill and through some thick brush, still not noticing that Puri
is following him. Or does he? He then sits down with three women (one
of them is nursing a baby) and one of them says, "Antonio, why
have you come here?" Another older (and dentally challenged)
woman asks, "To check on the hope chest of your fiancee? Do you
not trust us?" Antonio responds, "Oh, I have no doubt that
her hope chest will be lovely. As will be my fiancee. And as will be
everything associated with her, if it pleases our Lord. I happen to
be in the neighborhood and I thought i would stop in to pay my
respects." That is obviously a lie when you take into
considertion the rough route Antonio had to walk. Antonio also lies
when he tells one of the women he wanted to see how she and her
daughters were doing. He also says that the marriage ceremony and the
arrangements are all taken care of, while Puri watches him from a
long distance away, unable to hear what he is saying. Antonio also
tells the three women (one of whom will be his mother-in-law) that he
has already settled his accounts and doesn't owe anyone, neither God
or man, so the wedding should be clear sailing, His toothless future
mother-in-law looks at him and says, "To God always, Antonio. We
are always indebted to Him." Antonio says that God will bless
him with many children and the nursing woman asks him if he wants a
lot of children. Antonio says yes, he has already figured out all of
their names, but he cannot tell them what those names are because
once spoken, the names lose their charm and are lost forever. I know
what you are thinking. What does any of this have to do with the film
at hand? Quite simply, to show that this is a deeply religious town
that depends on God and all it means, maybe a little too much. But,
as the old saying goes, "If you believe in God than you must
believe in the Devil." Does this small town carry that belief?
We will soon find out.
As Antonio is walking home, he is stopped by Puri, who wants to know
why he is ignoring her. He says he has never pursued her and isn't
interested in her, telling her he is about to be married to another
woman. Puri says he may not want her, but she wants him, pulling him
to the ground, where they begin kissing and getting a little
touchy-feely. Antonio realizes what he is doing, gets up and begins
walking away, but Puri stops him and says if he will share a drink of
wine with her, she will stop pursuing him. Puri grabs his canteen and
pours the contents of what she put in the bread into his canteen and
then takes a drink from it, handing the canteen to Antonio, who is
also about to take a drink. Just before Antonio takes a drink, Puri
wants him to say, "So that you rest" before taking a drink,
but he refuses, saying those are the words of the dead. When he
drinks, Puri screams out, "With that wine you have drunk my
blood! You have drunk my body and my substance! I have bewitched you!
Now you will love me whether you want to or not! Have no fear! But if
you do fear, all the worse! You will go to ruin! Misfortune will
befall you! I have bewitched you!", then she runs away. Antonio
believes every word she says, as he throws his canteen to the ground
and stomps on it.
We then see Puri lying on the floor of her bedroom talking to
herself and saying Antonio is a traitor. If he doesn't start loving
her, she will make sure he is dead. She hears footsteps approaching
and jumps into bed, pulling the covers over her head. Her father,
mother and two brothers enter the room and surround the bed, her
father pulling the covers off her and saying he knows she is only
pretending to sleep. He begins to viciously whip her with a leather
strap. After a short time, her mother begs him to stop, saying Puri
has had enough. The brothers intervene, stopping their father from
punishing Puri so harshly. It takes a lot of intervening to get good
old Dad to stop whipping Puri, as he yells out, "I know what
horrible things you've done!" It takes both brothers and Mom to
stop Dad, the mother telling him that she doesn't think their
daughter did such a horrible thing. They all then leave the bedroom,
with Puri lying on
the bed battered and bruised, all her clothes nearly whipped off her body.
The next day, we see Antonio and his bride-to-be (Rossana Revere; A
QUIET PLACE TO KILL - 1970) walking to the church for their
wedding ceremony, while the church bells ring out loudly and Puri
watches the ceremony from a safe distance away (Truth be told,
Antonio's bride looks very plain and homely when compared to
Puri. Let's face it, she's downright fugly!). Puri, who once again
dresses all in black, looks heartbroken, as we watch the wedding
ceremony inside the church, where the candle on the bride's side
starts to flicker and get dimmer. One member in the church can be
heard saying that if the candle goes out, it means a bad omen for the
marriage. It brings misfortune, it brings death. Soon, everyone in
the church is looking at the candle, waiting for it to extinguish. We
then see Puri kneeling on the ground, crying while she says,
"Blood of Christ. Demon. A curse on him. A curse that he will
never forget me. A curse until the grave." Just then, we see the
candle get brighter, the flame rising higher, as a sigh of relief can
be heard from everyone inside the church, including the bride and
groom. Puri steals a young shepherd's staff and uses it to make the
sheep try to interfere with the wedding, but fails. Puri then bangs
on the church's door, calling out Antonio's name over and over, but
some townspeople apprehend and carry her away.
We then see the bride's mother and some other people preparing
the wedding bed (An old Italian religious custom), sliding a scythe
under the bed while chanting, "With this scythe under the bed,
you will protect them from demons." They then sprinkle grapes on
the bed while chanting, "Here are the grapes that have soaked up
all the evil that there is in this room. Here are the grapes purged
of all their juices that we arrange in the form of a cross. Dry
sweet, sweet grapes (Why don't they just call them raisins? I always
thought they were the Devil's food!). You shall be the bait for bad
thoughts. If they want to enter here, you will poison them." The
mother then puts salt under one of the pillows and says it's
time for the children to enter. Antonio and his bride (whom
remains nameless throughout the film) enter the bedroom and get the
mother's permission to do the dirty (I'm surprised the mother and
other people don't remain in the bedroon to watch them having sex!).
We see Puri hiding outside, holding a dead cat (!), while the mother
of the bride posts two men to stand guard outside the house, telling
them not to move. We hear Puri chant, "As this is born (the dead
cat), so, too, will be born the first son." She then repeats the
chant over and over, each time with more force in her voice. Puri
walks up to the two (sleeping) guards and throws the dead cat at
them. They chase her, but Puri loses them in a flock of sheep. The
elderly shepherd tells Puri he knows her, starts ripping her clothes
and hog-ties her. He then rips off all her clothes and rapes her (offscreen).
The next morning, we see Puri sitting on the bank of a river, while
a boy tries to have a conversation with her, but she ignores him. She
then looks at the boy, smiles and says his name is Salvatore. She
says she knows he has been very ill, but he has already cured
himself. Salvatore says yes, he has cured himself and is well. When
Puri asks him what he is doing, Salvatore says he is watching the
water, asking Puri if she likes the water. Puri tells him, "I
crossed to the east and came here in order to see the torrent"
and Salvatore says he crossed the same way. Puri and Salvatore become
quick friends, but Puri says she must go home now. You may not
realize this, but this short conversation holds a deep meaning to the
film's core story. If I reveal to you what it is, I would be
destroying one of the many surprises this film holds. Okay, I'm going
to ruin it for you, so here is your only SPOILER
WARNING!!!: Salvatore was a ghost, a spirit, for when
Puri arrives home, her mother tells her that Salvatore just died of
his illness. Puri runs to Salvatore's home and sees his dead body
laid out, while all the women in attendence cry. When Puri tells
Salvatore's mother that she was just talking to her son down by the
river, all the women call her a witch and begin to attack her, only
to be stopped by priest Father Tomaso (Giovanni Cristofanelli), who
tells the women that Puri is one of God's children. At Salvatore's
funeral, where everyone attending confesses their sins out loud
(another old religious Italian custom), Puri yells out, "I have
spoken with a demon! Virgin Mary, forgive me! I am damned!
Damned!" The Virgin Mary may forgive her, but she will get no
forgiveness from the townspeople, who look at her like she is the
Devil himself. END OF SPOILER!!!
The rest of the film is about Puri's journey into forgiving herself,
but it won't be easy, because a series of incidents paint Puri as a
real witch. You'll have to watch the film to discover Puri's hellish
journey and decide for yourself if she is actually damned or
suffering from a mental illness. You see, damnation does not only
come from God, it can come from within. Separating that line is not
as easy as you would think.
I wonder if director William Friedkin saw this film before making THE
EXORCIST (1973). There are too many scenes in this film that
are used nearly verbatim in Friedkin's film, including the
spider-walk sequence (Puri spider-walks inside a church while Father
Tommaso tries to exorcize the demon[s] he believes are possessing
her.). While the spider-walk sequence was edited out of Friedkin's
film, it was restored in the Special Edition of the film released
twenty-five years later. But that's neither here or there, as this
film is totally original and as bleak as they come. It is also full
of religious symbolism, such as the scene where Puri is sitting in a
tree eating an apple, as the townspeople curse the dark clouds that
are hanging over their town, thinking it is the Devil's work, while
chanting, "Begone! Go! Ugly cloud! Away with you, cloud!",
even though the town is desperately in need of rain for their
starving crops. While not necessarily a horror film, this film plays
more like a psychological thriller with supernatuaral overtones,
where religion is used as a crutch, ruining many lives in this small
village by trusting that God will do right by them. Others in the
village use religion for their own personal gain, be it monetary or
sexually, which Puri soon discovers (An "Exorcist" examines
Puri's body to see if she is really possessed, but all he is doing is
copping a few cheap feels and he also eventually rapes her). Since
this was made in 1963, director Brunello Rondi (A
VIOLENT LIFE - 1962; RIOT
IN A WOMEN'S PRISON - 1974; BLACK
EMMANUELLE, WHITE EMMANUELLE - 1976) was not able to show
sexually explicit material, but the screenplay, which he co-wrote
with Ugo Guerra (A BULLET
FOR SANDOVAL - 1969) and Luciano Martino (THE
MURDER CLINIC - 1966), is able to get the point across, not
by showing skin (although there are several scenes that do show it,
but not in any titillating way), but from the expressions on Puri's
face, in which Daliah Lavi turns in a performance so emotional and
finely-tuned, you'll be wondering why she acted in so few
films, as her performance is outstanding and, above all, believable
(Ms. Lavi passed away in 2017 at the age of 74). Frank Wolff, who is
equally excellent as Antonio, was a tragic figure in real life. He
suffered from a lifetime of depression, killing himself in a hotel
room in December of 1971 at the age of 43. Wolff, who got his start
appearing in several Roger Corman films (such as THE
WASP WOMAN and BEAST
FROM HAUNTED CAVE [both 1959]), had to move to Europe to
become successful, finding fame in Spaghetti Westerns (GOD
FORGIVES...I DON'T - 1967; THE
GREAT SILENCE - 1968; KILL
THEM ALL AND COME BACK ALONE - 1968) and a few Giallo films (DEATH
OCCURRED LAST NIGHT - 1970; COLD
EYES OF FEAR - 1971; and the aforementioned DEATH
WALKS ON HIGH HEELS - 1971) before his depression got the
better of him. I believe one of the main reasons this film works so
well is because many of the background actors are not actors at all;
they are just "regular" people, this being their only film
and giving this village a population of real people (i.e. dentally
challenged, wrinkled and just plain ugly). The black & white
cinematography, by Carlo Bellero (WOMEN
OF DEVIL'S ISLAND - 1962), also adds to the film's
effectiveness, as many of the compositions are truly amazing (it must
be viewed in widescreen to be fully appreciated). This is a film
quite unlike any genre film to come out of Italy in the early-'60s.
As a matter of fact, I can't think of a genre to which this film
could be applied to totally, making it a unique and rewarding
experience for viewers looking for something different from
everything else. If you are one of these people, this is the film for
you. It is my favorite film to come out of Italy (or anywhere else)
during the 1960s. This was the first screen credit for one of my
favorite Italian directors of all time, Sergio Martino (TORSO
- 1973), who was the Assistant Director here.
Shot as IL DEMONIO (a
literal translation of the review title), this film had no kind of
legitimate release in the United States at all, no theatrical, VHS or
disc release of any kind, not even on legitimate pay streaming
outlets. The only place to watch it is streaming on YouTube, where
channel "Nathan Conant" offers a nice anamorphic widescreen
print, in Italian with English subtitles (I don't believe this was
ever dubbed in English). Be aware that your only choice of subtitles
reads "Italian", but it is a typo; it's actually English.
Also featuring Maria Teresa Orsini (BARBARELLA
- 1968), Tiziana Casetti (THE
MINOTAUR, THE WILD BEAST OF CRETE - 1961), Anna Maria Aveta,
Dario Dolci, Franca Mazzoni and Nicola Tagliacozzo. Not Rated.
THE
DEVIL'S COMMANDMENT (1957) -
I remember this film when it was shown on WPIX TV's (Channel 11)
Chiller Theater constantly through the '60s & early-'70s, then it
just up and disappeared. What I didn't remember was how adult the
story was, but how was a pre-teen suppose to understand that? It also
didn't help that when this black and white Italian Gothic film played
in the United States, both in theaters and TV, much of the adult
content was edited out and newly-shot footage added, yet it still
came in fifteen minutes short of the Italian edit. This modern day
Gothic horror film mixes mad scientists with vampires (well, not
really vampires, but a weird take on living eternally, or longer
living through chemistry), all taking place in a creepy castle with
(what else?) plenty of secret passages. Directed by Riccardo Freda (CALTIKI,
THE IMMORTAL MONSTER - 1959; THE
GHOST - 1963; DOUBLE FACE
- 1969; IGUANA
WITH THE TONGUE OF FIRE - 1971; TRAGIC
CEREMONY - 1972; MURDER
OBSESSION - 1981) with an uncredited assist from
cinematographer Mario Bava (BLOOD
AND BLACK LACE - 1964; A
BAY OF BLOOD - 1971; SHOCK
- 1977), this film is an entertaining and atmospheric take on what it
means to live forever, as long as you don't mind killing virginal
young women to keep up appearances. And, oh, did I mention this was
the first Italian horror film of the "Talkies" era? Don't
worry, I will explain everything at the end of the review, but let's
get to the film proper.
The film begins with the body of a young woman being discovered
floating in the Seine River on the outskirts of Paris, France. The
coroner tells his assistants that her body has been totally drained
of blood, yet there are no injuries on her body, just like the three
other young women found murdered in Paris in as many weeks. Newspaper
reporter Pierre Lantin (Dario Michaelis; THE
MAD BUTCHER - 1972) is working on the story and has dubbed
the killer "The Vampire", which gets on the nerves of
Police Inspector Chantal (Carlo D'Angelo; THE
GREAT SILENCE - 1968). Pierre knows that discovering the
identity of the killer will be the greatest scoop of his career, so
he is not beyond taking some barely legal shortcuts to achieve his
goal, which is why the Inspector has such a low opinion of him.
We then see someone wearing black gloves opening a drawer and
looking at the file of twenty-year-old Nora Duval. We then see Nora
(Ronny Holiday), who is a dancer at a musical theater, telling her
three female friends (also dancers) that she can't go out with them
tonight; she has to wait at the theater for a phone call from her
boyfriend. Nora is a nervous wreck, not helped by reading Pierre's
latest newspaper story on the Vampire. The gloved man then enters the
theater, walks up the stairs and enters the room Nora is in. He puts
a chloroform-soaked rag over her nose and mouth and drags her
unconscious body away (We also get a very good look at the man who is
doing this in the mirror, the unmistakable visage of actor Paul Muller; LADY
FRANKENSTEIN - 1971). When Nora never makes it home, the
Inspector is called in and talks to the theater's concierge, who says
that he went out for a bite to eat and when he came back to the
theater, Nora was no longer there. The Inspector says that maybe Nora
went out with her boyfriend, but Pierre shows up and tells the
Inspector that Nora did not leave the theater willingly, showing him
a copy of his latest newspaper story, whose headline reads,
"Vampire Kidnaps Dancer From Theater." The Inspector tells
Pierre he is getting ahead of the story, but Pierre says he can prove
it, showing him a shoe that the concierge identifies as Nora's (If I
were the Inspector, I would have arrested Pierre for tampering with
evidence!). Pierre give the Inspector the shoe, telling him he found
it in the theater's wings and then leaves, saying he has got other
places to snoop around in (Pierre is so callous to the Inspector, no
one would blame him for putting a bullet between his eyes!). The
forensics doctor (a cameo by Freda) tells the Inspector that he has
one good clue: all four victims had the same blood type and they all
had traces of needle marks on their bodies with no signs of struggle.
Now this is where there is some adult talk (missing from the U.S.
version). The doctor tells the Inspector that not only doctors know
how to use hypodermic needles, just think how skilled drug addicts
and people who need to give themselves an injection every day are
(like diabetics).
Pierre is talking to his photographer, Ronald (Angelo Galassi), when
he notices some of the photos he took at one of the Vampire's crime
scenes contain a man in the background who looks to be purposely
hiding his face (we can see it is Nora's abductor). Pierre decides to
talk to the latest dead girl's female school friends as they walk out
of school, in hopes of coming up with a clue. Lorette (Wandisa Guida; THE
SCORPION WITH TWO TAILS - 1982) tells Pierre that a man was
following her the day her friend was murdered, describing him as tall
and thin and wearing a topcoat. When Pierre shows her the photo
Ronald took, Lorette says that is him. Pierre asks Lorette that if
she saw him again, could she identify him and she says yes, she'll
never forget the "dazed look" on his face. As Pierre is
talking to the girls, a jealous Giselle du Grand (Gianna Maria
Canale; HERCULES - 1958) pulls
up in her car and calls for Pierre, telling him she feels as if he is
neglecting her and he half-heartedly apologizes, saying the Vampire
murders are keeping him busy (It is apparent by the look on Ronald's
face, as he watches by a newspaper stand, that he has more than a
passing fancy for Giselle, but she hardly notices him). Giselle
accuses Pierre of being more interested in the schoolgirls than her
and not-so-politely blackmails him to visit her in her castle
tonight, otherwise she will call his boss and demand Pierre do a
story on the castle. Pierre agrees to see her tonight because he
knows that the du Grand family has a lot of political pull in Paris,
but he is not happy about it. Ronald tells Pierre that the most
beautiful woman in Paris just made eyes at him and he acts like he
doesn't care, but Pierre tells Ronald it is a long story between
their families and to leave it at that.
The man that kidnapped Nora is going through withdrawal on a bed,
begging an unseen man for a fix, but the unseen man tells him if he
wants his fix, he has to kidnap another young girl, showing him a
photo of Lorette. He gives him the address where Lorette will be
tonight and how to get into the building without being seen, giving
him just a small injection of the drug and promising him a full fix
when he kidnaps Lorette (This entire sequence is missing from the
American edit). Pierre sees the man walking by Lorette's school and
follows him to an apartment. He knocks on the door and the man
answers, quickly closing the door when Pierre asks if a fictional man
is there. Pierre takes a Polaroid of the apartment door, showing the
apartment's number and then goes to the Inspector to tell him
everything he knows. He brings the Inspector to the apartment
building, but when they knock on the apartment door, a one-armed man
answers, telling him he has been in this apartment all day and had no
visitors. He tells the Inspector that he's a former police officer
who lost his arm in the line of duty and has no idea what Pierre is
talking about (even the window, which Pierre saw when the jonesing
man answered the door, is now all bricked up!). How could all this
have been done in a span of twenty minutes? Is Pierre losing his
mind? The Inspector sure thinks so, calling Pierre a
"meddler" and accusing him of looking for publicity at any cost.
The tall, lanky drug addict then goes to the office of Professor
Julien du Grand (Antoine Balpetre; THE
HANDS OF ORLAC - 1960), where we discover the addict's name
is Joseph Signoret. He tells the Professor and his nameless
club-footed assistant (Renato Tontini) that he has to leave town and
he wants some money, a lot of money, otherwise he will tell the
police everything. The Professor tells Joseph he has no idea what he
is talking about, as the assistant sneaks up behind Joseph and
strangles him with a piece of rubber hose. The elderly Margherita du
Grand then enters the Professor's office and chides him for what has
happened, telling him there is only one way he can save face and
restore the good name of du Grand. The next day, newspaper headlines
read "Professor Julien du Grand Dies Unexpectedly."
Everyone important in Paris, except for Giselle, attends the
Professor's funeral, held at the Du Grand Castle cemetery family
mausoleum. One old man says to another that the Duchess Giselle never
attends funerals, she never has. Ronald wonders why the elderly
Margherita du Grand always covers her face with a black veil and
Pierre tells him that no one has seen her face for a long, long time.
Pierre goes on to say that Margherita was once a very beautiful woman
who could never adjust to growing old. Margherita was in love with
Pierre's father, but he hated her and wanted nothing to do with her.
She was a heartless woman who destroyed Pierre's mother's life (It
helps explain why Pierre wants nothing to do with Giselle, but if he
knew the whole story, no one would blame him if he put a bullet
between Giselle's eyes!). Think you know the secret? If you don't
want to know, I would advise you skip the next three paragraphs.
Warning: SPOILERS!!! It turns out
that the body buried in the Professor's tomb is not the Professor at
all, but Joseph. Joseph's corpse is stolen from the tomb and brought
to the secret castle laboratory run by a still-alive Professor du
Grand, who is working on a way to extend human life eternally.
Lorette meets a blind man on the street (who isn't really blind), who
asks her to personally deliver a letter for him. When she delivers
the letter, she is kidnapped and awakens in a room full of skeletons,
apparent victims of the Vampire. Pierre's boss (who doesn't care too
much for Pierre) takes him off the Vampire story and re-assigns him
to cover a fancy ball at the Castle du Grand. Pierre is livid at
Giselle, because he knows it was her that got him re-assigned (just
like she promised). Pierre leaves the ball early, telling Ronald that
he couldn't possibly love a womanlike Giselle, mainly for what her
family did to his. Ronald sees this as his opportunity to profess his
love to Giselle and tells Pierre he is staying, not knowing that he
is about to discover a secret he will not get the chance to tell
anyone else.
Ronald goes back to the ball and gets Giselle alone, where he
professes his love for her. Giselle callously turns him down, saying
neither she nor her family could possible accept a
"commoner" like him into their family and, frankly, she has
no interest in him whatsoever. As she is saying this, Ronald sees
Giselle turn old before his very eyes, revealing Giselle and
Margherita are the same person! She tells Ronald that each young girl
that was killed restored her youthful beauty for a short time, but
the times are getting shorter and shorter. Then she reaches for a
pistol and shoots Ronald, killing him. Giselle then tells the
Professor that he better perfect his serum so she can stay eternally
young without growing old again. The Professor tells Giselle that the
injections are playing havoc with her psyche and he thinks giving her
another shot will make her lose her mind totally, but she doesn't
care, she can't stand being old. The Professor takes some of
Lorette's youthful beauty and injects it into Giselle.
Pierre begins to notice Giselle acting stranger than normal. A
chance meeting on the street takes Giselle and Pierre to an antiques
store where Pierre notices Giselle signing a check for a painting
with the wrong hand (She is right-handed, but signs her name with her
left hand). Things turn really bad when a revived Joseph wakes up in
the Professor's lab and escapes. Pierre brings Joseph to the police
station, where he confesses to kidnapping the young women, but tells
the Inspector he didn't kill them, the Professor and his assistant
did. Pierre, the Inspector and his men search the castle and find
nothing, but as they are about to leave, a totally wigged-out Giselle
(who is taunting Pierre and the Inspector for finding nothing) begins
to turn old before their very eyes, transforming into Margherita. Not
believing his own eyes, the Inspector tells his men to make a more
thorough search of the castle, where they find the Professor's hidden
laboratory, resulting in a gun battle, where the Professor and his
assistant are shot dead. They open the Professor's tomb and find
Lorette inside, still alive, and send her home with her father. And
what about Giselle? The Inspector tells Pierre a few days later
(wrapping-up the film) that he arrested Giselle and put her in a jail
cell, where she died of old age a short time later. END
OF SPOILERS!!!
If it seems that this film's finale seems rushed, it is because
director Riccardo Freda went into one of his patented snits and
stormed off set (just like he did on CALTIKI),
never to return, with the film only half finished, leaving
cinematographer Mario Bava to rewrite the script (screenplay by
Freda, Piero Regnoli [director of THE
PLAYGIRLS AND THE VAMPIRE - 1960; and screenwriter of THE
THIRD EYE - 1966 and many more horror films] and Rijk
Sijostrom [his only film credit]) and complete the film in two days
(this film only had a twelve day shooting schedule). A lot of people
credit this film for jump-starting the Italian horror film industry,
since Benito Mussolini banned horror films in the '20s through the
'40s for stupid reasons relating to the beginning of World War II
(and being scared to death when watching Karloff's FRANKENSTEIN
[1932] in a theater!) and this was the first talking Italian horror
film (which is reason enough to give it a place in history), but the
fact is this film tanked at the Italian boxoffice and lost money. It
wouldn't be until Bava released BLACK
SUNDAY in 1960 that Italian horror films caught fire (and
rightfully so). That's not to say this film doesn't contain some good
stuff, because it does. Bava's black and white cinematography is
beyond reproach, evoking an eerie atmospheric vibe in every
fog-shrouded location (even though it was set in Paris, the entire
film was shot on stages in Rome, Italy). This film was also shot in
CinemaScope, a rarity for an Italian genre film and Bava takes full
advantage of the extremely wide frame. The film looks rather
expensive, even though it was a low-budget affair shot in two weeks.
Like I said in the beginning of this review, this film's plot is very
adult in terms of drugs and addiction. Turns out it was a little too
adult for American audiences because when it was released here in
1963 (under the review title), a full six years after it was made,
all scenes depicting drug use and addiction were excised from the
film and replaced with newly-shot footage, some of it featuring Al
Lewis, "Grandpa" on TV's THE
MUNSTERS (1964 - 1966). Most of the original sequences were
drastically shortened and it contained a new opening credits
sequence, as well as a new five minute sequence of a young
woman being killed in a restaurant, yet the original film's 85-minute
running time was shortened to 70 minutes. This review is based on the
uncut Italian version, which doesn't cater to prudes or those easily
offended. Those that are should watch the American edit instead,
which, surprisingly, contains new footage that treads closely to
female nudity in the opening credits sequence. I guess near-nudity
was more acceptable than drug use. This film is actually a modern
take on the Elizabeth Bathory legend, which was covered in such films
as COUNTESS DRACULA
(1971), DAUGHTERS OF DARKNESS
(1971) and THE LEGEND OF
BLOOD CASTLE (1972), but instead of bathing in the blood of
virgins to keep her youth, she just steals their youth with a simple
injection (the film fails to mention if the murdered girls were
virgins, but their friends certainly were!). There are a couple of
horrifying transformation scenes in this film, done with an eye for
shocking the audience and it succeeds. The transformation scenes
would still work in films today, because they are that good. This may
be the first Italian-made horror film in the Sound Era, but it
delivers in spades with shocks and scares.
Shot as and known around the world as I
VAMPIRI ("The Vampires") and also known as LUST
OF THE VAMPIRE, LADY VAMPIRE and EVIL'S COMMANDMENT,
this film was released
to U.S. theaters under the review title in 1963 by Releasing
Corporation of Independent Producers (RCIP), shorn of over 25 minutes
with nearly ten minutes of new footage and a new opening credits
sequence added, showing how the first girl found floating in the
Seine was murdered. As far as I could tell, this film never had a
legitimate VHS release in the United States, although there were many
"gray market" VHS releases by outfits such as Something
Weird and Sinister Cinema, all the U.S. cut of the film. The uncut
Italian version did obtain a DVD
release in the United States through Image Entertainment in 2001
(with a 2012 re-release). It contained stills of the American insert
footage. There have been no updated discs since then, but if you have
an All Region player, Germany offers both versions on DVD. The uncut
Italian version was offered streaming on YouTube by user "Horror
Realm" in a very nice widescreen print in Italian with English
subtitles, but, unfortunately, Horror Realm was sent to "YouTube
Jail" for uploading licensed films he had no right to upload and
trying to bypass licensing rules by only italicizing the titles.
Stupid move. This is one film that is screaming for a Blu-Ray release
with all the bells and whistles. Also featuring Charles Fawcett
(Freda's MACISTE IN HELL
- 1962), Miranda Campa (THE
FOURTH VICTIM - 1971) and Gisella Mancinotti as one of
Lorette's schoolgirl friends. Not Rated.
THE
DEVIL'S NIGHTMARE (1971) -
Crackling good Italy/Belgium horror flick that uses the Seven Deadly
Sins as a means of disposing people (Much in the same way as THE
REDEEMER [1976] and SE7EN
[1995] did. It makes me wonder if they used this film as a blueprint.).
Berlin 1945: Allied Forces begin bombing the European capital of
evil, where a
woman is just about to give birth, overseen by Nazi Baron Von
Rhoneberg (Jean Servais; BLACK JESUS
- 1968). As the building begins to crumble around them, the woman
(whom we find out is the Baron's wife) gives birth, the Baron asking
if it is a boy. The midwife (Frédérique Hender) tells
him it's a girl and the Baron looks deeply troubled. He tells
everyone to leave the building and go to safety, he will take care of
the baby. He christens the baby girl "Camilla Von Rhoneberg"
and then kills her with a cerimonial dagger. The credits then appear
and we then see the Baron in modern day (at least in 1971), talking
to a female psychiatrist (Yvonne Garden), who wants to take photos of
the Baron's castle, which he flat-out prohibits her from doing. She
goes to the castle anyway, snapping away with her camera. She will
suddenly realise that she should have listened to the Baron, as a
metal spear comes out of nowhere to puncture one of her car's tires
and something chases her into the woods, killing her.
A busload of tourists are traveling down a road when their path is
blocked by a roadblock. The bus driver, Max Ducha (Christian
Maillet), asks a strange-looking pale man (Daniel Emilfork; THE
CITY OF LOST CHILDREN - 1995), who is attending to a
controlled fire with a pitchfork, how long it will take them to get
to their intended destination and he replies that they will have to
take a ferry, but it doesn't leave until tomorrow. He tells them to
go to the Baron's castle and he'll give them room and board for the
night. We then see some people carrying the psychiatrist's dead body
into town, where a doctor says she probably died of a heart attack.
The doctor says, by the look on her face, she died from fear and his
assistant points to a strange wound on her arm. An old woman says,
"It's the mark of the Devil!" and then crosses herself.
The tourists arrive at the castle, where Corinne (Ivana Novak; THE
BIG BUST-OUT - 1972) is nearly beaned on her head by a piece
of a stone gargoyle that falls from the castle. The front door of the
castle opens on its own and Regine (Shirley Corrigan; CRIMES
OF THE BLACK CAT - 1972) is frightened by a frog that
crosses her path. The Baron's butler, Hans (Maurice Degroot),
welcomes the group and tells them he was expecting them, as a woman
called and said they were coming, even telling him their names. Hans
shows Father Alvin Sorel (Jacques Monseu), a theology student who is
not yet a priest, to his room, telling him to be careful where he
places his suitcase, because this room has the mark of the Devil (the
same symbol that was on the psychiatrist's arm) on the floor next to
the fireplace. Hans gives him a history of his room. The mark dates
back to December 8, 1575, the date Erika Von Rhoneberg plunged a
knife into a monk's heart, who was performing an exorcism her. Erika
then disappeared, leaving this mark of the Devil.
Hans then shows married couple Howard (Lorenzo Terzon; LADY
FRANKENSTEIN - 1971) and Nancy Foster (Colette Emmanuelle)
to their room and they find an unconscious pigeon on the floor. Hans
then tells them the history of their room. In 1436, Prince and
Princess Hart had their throats cut when they were sleeping (He sure
has a way of making guests feel comfortable!). Hans then shows Max to
his room (while stroking the pigeon!) and then shows the elderly Mr.
Mason (Lucien Raimbourg) to his room, where he complains that the
room is stuffy. Hans says there is nothing he can do about it since
the window is sealed shut and then continues to tell him why. The
window has been sealed since 1738, when Lily Von Rhoneberg fell to
her death from that window. Hans then shows Corinne and Regine to
their room (Regine is too scared to sleep alone and I can't blame
her, but we find out there is another reason!).
We then see the Baron in a laboratory in the castle basement, where
is is performing some unknown (for now) experiment. We then see Max
pull sausage and salami from his suitcase (He is always stuffing his
face with something), while Corinne and Regine have a lesbian
encounter. Nancy accuses Howard of cheating on her, going as far to
say that he only married her for her money (Howard makes a
half-hearted remark denying it). The Baron introduces himself to the
group over dinner, where he gives his guests a history of the Von
Rhoneberg family line. "In the 12th century, my ancestor,
Sigfried Von Rhoneberg, is said to have signed a pact with the Devil.
In exchange for his services, Satan demanded that the eldest daughter
of each generation of my family will will be in his service, where
she'll become a succubus." Father Alvin explains to everyone
what a succubus is: Demons that adopt a feminine appearance in order
to seduce man and lead him to perdition. Howard and Mr. Mason don't
believe in such things, so Father Alvin asks them if they believe in
the Devil. They do not reply. Regine asks the Baron if he has a
daughter and all he can do is give her a forlorn look.
The castle housekeeper (who was the midwife in the beginning of the
film) recognises Corinne and says to her that she was told never to
come to the castle again. Who is she really? The castle is thrown in
to a state of turmoil when the phone goes dead and the castle is
visited by Lisa Müller (Erika Blanc; A
DRAGONFLY FOR EACH CORPSE - 1973), a sexy young woman in an
even sexier outfit who is obviously a succubus. The castle's
harmonium begins to play by itself while Father Alvin and Mr. Morris
play chess, with Lisa making not-so-subtle advances to the good
Father. Howard hits on Corinne and she agrees to meet him behind the
stairs at midnight. Nancy, who fancies herself somewhat knowledgable
in the art of magic, insist on seeing the Baron's laboratory. We then
find out that the Baron is trying to turn lead into gold without the
aid of the legendary Philosopher's Stone. Then the shit goes off the
rails. Regina screams and everyone runs to her room, where she has a
bloody wound on her arm and she doesn't know how it got there. They
then hear another scream and run downstairs, finding a dead cat
impaled on an ancient torture device. Lisa suddenly appears in Father
Alvin's bed, strips naked and tries to temp the not-quite-Father, but
he is able to resist her ample charms and she disappears. Father
Alvin reads an old book on the Rhoneberg Curse and learns a lot,
maybe too much. Since Lisa wasn't successful with Father Alvin, she
turns her attention to Max, tempting him with his favorite food and
drink. Since Max's sin is GLUTTONY, he eats himself to death, while
Lisa smiles and turns a deadly shade of white. Nancy wants Howard to
help her look for gold in the Baron's laboratory, but he has other
plans, meeting Corinne at the appointed place and time. Nancy's sin
is GREED and as she searches for what she thinks is a fortune in
gold, Lisa has her drown in a pool of gold dust. Howard and Corinne's
sin is LUST and they also meet fitting ends at the hands of Lisa. Can
you guess what the other sins that the guests are guilty of (SLOTH,
WRATH, ENVY and PRIDE are left)? It's all in this review.
Father Alvin makes a deal
with the Devil (the strange-looking man he saw carrying the pitchfork
by the fire earlier in the film) to get all the guests to return to
life, but he will learn that there is no easy deal when it comes to Satan.
I have seen this film at least a dozen times and it never gets old.
What is amazing to me is that director Jean Brisme'e (that's the way
it is spelled in the opening credits) never made anything else of
note before or after this. That's a shame, because he shows a sure
hand with the material, especially in the way he depicts the guests'
major sins and the way they die because of it. It's the minor details
here that makes the film so enjoyable to watch, such as Regine's
death by snake (A lesbian killed by a snake? How's that for
symbolism?!?). While much of the symbolism in this film will go over
many people's heads, those that are attuned to such things will be
richly rewarded. The screenplay, by Patrice Rhomm
(Director/screenwriter of FRAULEIN
DEVIL - 1977, as "Mark Starr") & Pierre-Claude
Garnier (Director of TANGO
OF PERVERSION - 1974) is that perfect blend of horror and
atmosphere which many films try to achieve, but which few films are
able to deliver. This is definitely a thinking man's horror film, but
casual viewers should enjoy it, too. It works on both fronts.
Filmed as LA PLUS
LONGUE NUIT DU DIABLE ("The Longest Night Of The
Devil") and also known under a slew of titles, including THE
DEVIL WALKS AT MIDNIGHT, CASTLE
OF DEATH and SUCCUBUS.
This film had a U.S. theatrical release in the early-'70s (from
Hemisphere Pictures) as part of a double bill with the British film IN
THE DEVILS GARDEN (a.k.a. THE CREEPERS
- 1971), which is how I first saw it. Motion Picture Marketing (MPM)
the released it to theaters in the early-'80s under the inappropriate
title VAMPIRE PLAYGIRLS.
It also had many VHS releases, also under many titles, from labels
like Saturn Productions, AIR
Video, Regal Video,
Monterey Home Video
and many others. Since this film is in the Public Domain (PD), it has
had many fullscreen budget DVD releases, as well as a few widescreen
releases, from Image Entertainment and Redemption Films. My review is
based on the uncut widescreen print on Mill
Creek Entertainment's PURE
TERROR 50 FILM CLASSIC FEATURES DVD compilation. It is the
uncut English-dubbed Italian print, containing both the baby stabbing
and the lesbian encounter, scenes missing from the U.S. theatrical
version, all the U.S. VHS versions and most of the budget DVD
releases. The print is sharp and blemish-free, something unusual
coming from Mill Creek. No Blu-Ray at the time of this review. The
theatrical version was Rated R, but this version is Not Rated.
DOCTOR
BUTCHER M.D. (MEDICAL DEVIATE)
(1980) - "...and He Makes House Calls!" Retire all your
blurry and dark Paragon
and ThrillerVideo
fullscreen VHS tapes of this Americanized version of ZOMBIE
HOLOCAUST (released by Terry Levene's Aquarius
Releasing in 1981) because Severin Films found vault elements of
this much-requested title in New York and released it on a two-disc Blu-Ray
set (with the original Italian film, which was previously released
on DVD by Shriek Show with a reversible cover), loaded with great
extras that brought back long-suppressed memories of my time seeing
films in Times Square. I prefer this version over the original or one
reason: Walter E. Sear's effective electronic music score, which adds
a lot to what is basically a mash-up of Italian cannibal and
zombie genres, making the film move at a much quicker pace (Nico
Fidenco's score in the original adds nothing to the film in my opinion).
The film opens with unrelated footage from an unfinished 7-part 1978
zombie anthology film called TALES THAT WILL TEAR YOUR HEART OUT
(There is more footage of this film as an extra on the Blu-Ray, where
we also learn Wes Craven was also one of the seven directors). We
then watch as some disguised stranger enters the morgue of a teaching
hospital in New York City, where he saws off the hand of a male
corpse. This hospital has been experiencing a series of missing body
parts and organs, so they set up a trap for the thief. We then see
the thief cut out the heart of a still-living patient (some trap!)
and begins to eat it, but he is caught by Dr. Drydock (Walter
Patriarca; CANNIBAL APOCALYPSE
- 1980) and it turns out he is an orderly at the hospital named Toran
(Turam Quibo; ADIOS SABATA
- 1970, using the name "Joseph Persaud"), a native of the
Moluccas tribe in the West Indies who pray to Kito, the Cannibal God.
Before Dr. Drydock can question him, Toran bolts and jumps through a
hospital window, falling to his death (an obvious dummy loses its
right arm when it hits the pavement!). Nurse Lori Ridgeway (Alexandra
Delli Colli; NEW YORK RIPPER
- 1982) notices that Toran has the symbol of Kito tattooed on his
chest, a symbol that represents a tribe of cannibals in the Moluccas
Islands. Lori knows this because she is an anthropology nut and she
has a ceremonial dagger with the symbol of Kito hanging on a wall in
her home (it ends up missing).
We then see Lori traveling to the West Indies with Dr. Peter
Chandler (Ian McCulloch; CONTAMINATION
- 1980), N.Y. Express reporter Susan Kelly (Sherry Buchanan; EYES
BEHIND THE STARS - 1977), whose newspaper is financing this
expedition, and jack-of-all-trades George Harper (Peter O'Neal; his
only film), Once they arrive on one of the islands, they are greeted
by Dr. Obrero (Donald O'Brien; GHOSTHOUSE
- 1987) and he assigns Molotto (Dakar; real name: Alejandro Dakar; ATOR,
THE FIGHTING EAGLE - 1982) to guide them on their expedition
to find the tribe that worship Kito. That night, Lori finds a
severed, rotting head (complete with maggots) in her bed, along with
the symbol of Kito drawn in blood on the sheet. Dr. Obrero assures
Lori that if the natives wanted her dead she would be dead (How
comforting!). The next morning they begin their expedition through
the jungle (without Dr. Obrero), but it is obvious that Molotto is
not leading them to their intended destination.
The party lose some of their native crew to spiked booby-traps and
they are eventually taken prisoner by a tribe of cannibals, who
devour George alive (they slice open George's stomach and chow down
on his intestines; they even poke out his eyes with their fingers and
eat them!), but just when it looks like curtains for Peter and Lori
(Susan is nowhere to be found), some rotting zombies appear in the
jungle and scare the cannibals away. Lori, Peter and Molotto run
quickly through the jungle and discover that Dr. Obrero is waiting
for them. Just what is he doing in the jungle? Peter grows suspicious
of Dr. Obrero and rightfully so. It seems the not-so-good doctor
wants them to leave the island as quickly as possible. But just what
exactly is he up to? Peter aims to find out and takes Lori with him
(they decline Dr. Obrero's offer to have Molotto show them the way).
After surviving zombie attacks and other jungle booby-traps (Peter
kills one zombie with the spinning blades of an outboard motor to its
head), they finally discover what Dr. Obrero is doing. They think
they see Susan, but it turns out to be a zombie wearing Susan's
scalp! We see Dr. Obrero operating on a still-alive (but hairless and
scalpless) Susan (he cuts her vocal cords because her screams annoy
him!). Dr. Obrero is actually the Dr. Butcher of the title and he is
trying to transplant living brains into dead bodies, thereby being
the first person to successfully perform a brain transplant. All his
previous tries have been failures (which is why there are zombies
everywhere) and he tells Peter that he hopes to expand human life by
over a hundred years, but he believes he needs civilized brains for
his operation to be successful. He plans on using Peter's brain to
reach his goal. Will Dr. Butcher be successful?
Filmed on the same sets as director Lucio Fulci's gut-munching
classic ZOMBIE (1979;
also starring Ian McCulloch), this film bears striking similarities
to that movie. They both contain extreme gore and eating of body
parts, the zombie makeups are nearly the same (although both are done
by different special effect makeup artists) and contain some amazing
nudity from the female cast (Alexandra Delli Colli does a totally
nude sequence at the end of the film that will remind fans of
cannibal cinema of Ursula Andress' scene in MOUNTAIN
[SLAVE] OF THE CANNIBAL GOD - 1978. Alexandra is a beautiful
woman and this is why nudity is important in horror films!). This was
director Marino Girolami's (VIOLENT
ROME - 1975; A
SPECIAL COP IN ACTION - 1976; ROME:
THE OTHER SIDE OF VIOLENCE - 1976), here using his
"Frank Martin" pseudonym, only horror film (he passed away
in 1994). He was the father of exploitation vets, director Enzo G.
Castellari (THE LAST SHARK
- 1981; THE NEW BARBARIANS
- 1983; LIGHT BLAST -
1985) and actor Ennio Girolami (THE
FEAST OF SATAN - 1971; DAY
OF THE COBRA - 1980). The screenplay of DR. BUTCHER
was written by Romano Scandariato (EMANUELLE
AND THE LAST CANNIBALS [a.k.a. TRAP
THEM AND KILL THEM] - 1977) based on a story by Fabrizio De
Angelis, director/writer of such films as OPERATION
NAM (1989) and KILLER
CROCODILE (1989).
But the real treat on this double Blu-Ray set is not the films at
all, but the interview with 86 year-old
Terry Levene, who regales us with the history of Aquarius
Releasing (They distributed some of the goriest Italian films
during the '70s, including the unredeemable BURIED
ALIVE [a.k.a. BEYOND
THE DARKNESS - 1979; just listening to Levene's opinion of
this film is worth the price of admission!], MAKE
THEM DIE SLOWLY [a.k.a. CANNIBAL
FEROX - 1981] and 7
DOORS OF DEATH [a.k.a. THE BEYOND
- 1981], all heavy moneymakers for Aquarius). Levene looks like a
balding and slightly overweight Jewish man who has a fondness for
saying "So on and so forth...", yet his knowledge of the
films he distributed and the history of "The Deuce" (Times
Square) are second to none. I could have watched him talking for over
two hours and be satisfied with my purchase (Levene had an office
above the Selwyn Theater, located in the heart of The Deuce, where I
originally saw this film.), but there are many other extras on the
disc, including: a tour of Times Square with Temple
Of Schlock's Chris Poggiali and filmmaker Roy Frumkes (STREET
TRASH - 1987), who share many stories about their time at
the Deuce; an entertaining interview with Gore Gazette's Rick
Sullivan, who discusses the William Castle-like promotion he did for
this film (The "Butchermobile', a flatbed truck where Psychotronic
Video's Michael Weldon played a victim to Gary Hertz's Doctor
Butcher, while Sullivan ballyhooed the film over a loud speaker), his
encounters with Bill Landis (whom I have nothing but bad memories of,
but that's a story for another day) and the U.S. Postal Service
raiding his house for selling underage VHS videos of Traci Lords
(Sullivan said one Postal Agent told him, "If you used UPS, we
wouldn't be here"!); and so much more. This may be my favorite
Blu-Ray set of all time (it even comes with a replica barf
bag, which was originally handed out to patrons when it played
in Aquarius Theaters). Thanks, Severin, for bringing back all those
memories I long thought I forgot! Everyone who has ever stepped foot
in Times Square should search out this Blu-Ray. It's essential. The
film is Unrated. USELESS TRIVIA DEPT: When Rick
Sullivan's house was raided, he turned over his film library to my
friend Mike Decker, who runs the gray market site Just For The Hell
Of It Video (www.j4hi.com).
Sullivan disappeared from the horror zine field, but unlike most gray
market DVD-R sites, Mike's site is still going strong. He has the
best copies of some hard-to-find titles at a reasonable price. I
recommend you use him. NOTE: Rick Sullivan passed away in
December 2017.
DOCTOR
DEATH: SEEKER OF SOULS (1973) - "Enter
that body! Enter that body! I command you, enter that body!"
Once you hear this phrase, be prepared to laugh hysterically. This
little gem from the early 70's should fail on every level. It's
statically filmed like a 70's TV movie. The acting is so broad that
it becomes hard to overlook. And the plot is so absurd that it is
laughable. Guess what? I believe that all these points are deliberate
and gel together beautifully. Fred Saunders (Barry Coe) loses his
beautiful wife Laura (Jo Morrow) in an automobile accident. Before
she dies, she promises Fred that she will somehow come back and be
with him. He preserves her body and places it in a tomb where he
instructs the caretaker, Franz (Jim Boles), to leave it unlocked so
he can come back and look at her body. An obsessed Fred tries to find
a way to bring his wife back from the dead, visiting a phony medium
and a crazy death-worshipping cult, with no success (but much
enjoyment for the viewer). He then spots an ad in an alternative
newspaper advertising a way to reincarnate souls. He answers the ad
and meets Tana (Florence "QUEEN
OF BLOOD" Marley), a representative for a doctor that
can solve Fred's problem. She takes him to a demonstration given by
Doctor Death (John Considine), who has found a way to transfer souls
from murdered bodies to corpses! His demo consists of transfering the
soul of a horribly-scarred girl (who he saws in half simply for the
"theatrics") to the body of a dead beautiful girl. When she
rises to life, Fred at first rejects the notion of transferring
another soul to his wife's body ("It won't actually be her
coming back to life, will it?" he asks the Doctor) but soon
relents since he misses her so much. Doctor Death and his
facially-scarred mute servant Thor (Leon Askin) then murder Tana in
front of Fred, buy throwing a knife into her heart (theatrics again).
Fred, who is horrified, wants nothing to do with it but is forced by
Doctor Death to go along. When the good doctor tries to transfer
Tana's soul into Laura, it is unsuccessful, because Laura's will,
even in death, is too strong. Fred sees this as a sign to stop but
Doctor Death sees this merely as a challenge and soon (unbeknownst to
Fred) begins murdering young girls in various ways, capturing their
souls and, time after time, failing miserably in transferring their
souls to Laura's body (this is where the phrase at the top of this
review comes into play.). Meanwhile, Fred has moved on and begins
dating his secretary Sandy (Cheryl Miller). When Fred is delivered a
severed head of one of the murdered girls to his office by Doctor
Death (who leaves a note telling Fred that he will complete their
contract no matter how many girls he has to kill), Fred springs into
action and, with his physician friend Greg (Stewart Moss) and a
couple of policemen, sets out to stop Doctor Death. Unfortunately,
Doctor Death has kidnapped Sandy and is slowly bleeding her to death,
in hopes that her soul will be the final one he needs to bring Laura
back to life. Will Fred arrive in time and stop Doctor Death?
This wonderful little-seen gem delights in so many ways that it
should be viewed by all lovers of 70's horror. Surprisingly, it is
nudity-free (but full of beautiful women in various state of undress)
and the blood doesn't really flow until about the 45 minute mark.
When it does come, it is shocking and hysterical at the same time.
When Doctor Death is stabbed in the stomach by a young man he has
attacked, his blood squirts on the man's face, melting it like acid!
There are various other bloody bits that earned it an R-rating when
regionally released to theaters in 1973. I'll leave them for you to
discover. The real standout here is John Considine (THE
THIRSTY DEAD - 1974, and long-time soap opera actor), whose
over-the-top portrayal as Doctor Death lifts this film from simple
black comedy to the overly surreal. He digs his nails into this role
and the viewer is greatly rewarded for the experience. I was laughing
constantly at his failed attempts to revive Laura. Director Eddie
Saeta, who died in 2005, sadly never directed another theatrical film
(he previously directed a couple of series TV episodes) but was a
jack-of-all-trades in motion pictures, being producer, assistant
director and production manager on many major films right up till his
death. As I said earlier, the film has a TV-movie look, but switches
to almost dream-like sequences at the most unexpected moments (such
as Fred's visit to the death-worshipping cult), throwing the viewer
for a loop. Silver-haired Stooge Moe Howard (his last role) makes a
cameo as an audience member who assists Doctor Death in confirming
that a woman's body is dead (and makes a sexual quip about the
experience) as does horror host Larry "Seymour" Vincent,
who appears as a killer in a film shown on a victim's television. Add
a finale that is creepy (and should have spawned a sequel but, alas,
it never happened) and you have a great unsung minor classic that has
managed to stay mostly unseen (at least in the New York area) for
over 30 years. A Prism Entertainment
Home Video VHS Release. Also released on widescreen
DVD by Scorpion Releasing,
in a stunning high definition master. Rated R.
DON'T
LOOK
IN THE BASEMENT (1973) - I
have always loved this film the many times I have seen it in theaters
(under a littany of titles; I consider this film just as important as I
DRINK YOUR BLOOD [1971]; LAST
HOUSE ON THE LEFT [1972]; and THE
TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE [1974] as an influential film from
my teenage years of going to theaters during the 70's), on VHS and
then on Public Domain DVD compilations, so I always hoped that
someone, anyone, would release a widescreen version, since all we
have gotten over the years were dupey-looking fullscreen versions.
Film Chest announced a "Digitally Remastered" DVD version
late in 2014, and while it looks better than most versions of the
film, it was still the fullscreen version. I've actually had people
tell me that it was filmed in fullscreen, but they are full of shit
because I have seen this film at least ten times in theaters and
it most certainly was in widescreen. I think most companies don't
want to release a widescreen version because they think that the
fullscreen version has saturated the market and no one will buy it,
but just look at Code Red's widescreen version of SILENT
NIGHT, BLOODY NIGHT (1972), which they released in
widescreen after nearly every DVD compilation company had their
fullscreen version and companies will see that there is success in
releasing PD features in their proper aspect ratio, as long as some
time is taken to restore the film (like Code Red did). Even though
Texan director/producer S.F. Brownrigg only did a handful of films,
they were memorable films, not just because they were sleazy (which
they certainly were), but because they were also well-acted by a cast
faithful to Brownrigg, who would appear in nearly every film he did
(and a lot of the actors go back to the 60's Texas exploitation
scene, where they were just as committed to Larry Buchannan). This is
Brownrigg's first film (shot in 12 days on a budget of $100,000) and
it is still my favorite (although his POOR
WHITE TRASH PART II [1974] runs a very close second). The
film is quite complex in its storyline: The film opens with Nurse
Jane (Jessie Lee Fulton) telling the head psychiatrist at Stephens
Sanitorium, Dr. Stephens (Michael Harvey), that she can't stay on any
longer and she is leaving because she finds his methods of dealing
with patients too unsettling. For instance, he has the violent Judge
Oliver W. Cameron (Gene Ross, who is simply terrific in the entire
film and will send chills down your spine) chopping a log with an axe
to release his aggressions, but he sneaks behind Dr. Stephen while he
is taking to Nurse Jane and plants the axe in his back, killing him.
Dr. Masters (Anne MacAdams) tells everyone to keep Dr. Stephens'
death a secret, at least for now. We are introduced to the patients:
Harriett (Camilla Carr), a mentally unstable woman who keeps a doll
and treats it as her baby. When someone steals the doll and puts it
in Nurse Jane's bedroom, Harriett kills her. Sergeant Jaffee (Hugh
Feagin), who spends every night looking out his bedroom window with
binoculars, trying to spot "Them". Danny (Jessie Kirby), an
always-laughing young red-headed adult who gets off on stealing
Harriett's doll and playing practical jokes on the rest of the
patients and crew. Jennifer (Maryette Warren), a very bashful girl
who needs someone to open her up (that person will be arriving
shortly). Judge Cameron (who we had the pleasure of meeting in the
beginning of the film), who is always passing judgment on the
patients and the staff. Allyson (Betty Chandler), who is such a
nymphomaniac, if it has two legs, she'll fuck it. And finally, the
hulking black man Sam (William Bill McGhee), who loves Dr. Masters
just as much as he loves Popsicles and will do pretty much what Dr.
Masters says. Even though he's the biggest patient of the bunch, he's
just a gentle giant. Arriving at the Stephens Sanitorium is Charlotte
Beale (Rosie Holotik), who Dr. Stephens hired as a nurse before he
was murdered. This worries Dr. Masters very much, but when Charlotte
mentions that maybe she should go to the local police to report Dr.
Stephens missing, Dr. Masters hires her rather reluctantly. It is
then that Charlotte meets the final patient in the Sanitorium, the
elderly Mrs. Callingham (Rhea MacAdams, who could scare the white off
of rice; she was in her upper 80's when she took this role), who
warns Charlotte, "Get out! Get out! And never ever come back for
any reason!" (It scared the shit even out of me!). Charlotte is
introduced to the rest of the patients, who welcome her with open
arms, especially Sam and Jennifer (who is rather schizophrenic). Dr.
Masters mentions to Charlotte that she will be sleeping on the same
floor as the patients, because Dr. Stephens thought both patients and
staff should live side-by-side with no locks on the doors (this is
unheard of in every sanitorium in the world!). The next morning,
Nurse Charlotte checks up on old Mrs. Callingham, only to discover
her on the floor, her face all bloody and her tongue missing. Dr.
Masters tells Charlotte that Mrs. Callingham was into
self-mutilation, but when Charlotte asks where her tongue is, Dr.
Masters says she probably ate it! (A conversation I don't remember
being in any version I ever saw). The phones haven't been working for
several days (I wonder why?) and Dr. Masters says she will take care
of it, but when she doesn't and telephone repairman Ray Daniels
(Robert Dracup) shows up on his own and asks Dr. Masters why she
never reported it (seems like the phone company noticed the outage on
their own and decided to check it out), Dr. Masters has no choice but
to let him fix the phones, but not before chewing him out for talking
to the patients. The phone board is in a closet and nymphomaniac
Allyson traps him in there (and makes him promise to marry her) and
we have to let our imaginations take over as to what happens. Next,
for some unknown reason, Jennifer tries to stab Charlotte with a
knife (I told you she was schizophrenic), but Dr. Masters slaps her
in the face (very unusual treatment by a doctor to her patient). Dr.
Masters then finds a handwritten note in Sergeant Jaffee's room (we
are not allowed to read it), so she crumples it up. sets it on fire
and makes the Sergeant hold it in his hand untils it burns out
completely (Say, what kind of doctor is Doctor Masters? Doctor of
Sadism?). Sam wants to tell Charlotte what happened to Dr. Stephens,
but he gives her Dr. Stephens' pocket watch and hopes she figures it
out on her own. Danny tries to rape Charlotte (so much for not having
locks on the doors), but Judge Cameron is her savior and tosses Danny
out of her room (He may be a killer, but he does have a conscience).
Some drugs end up missing from the Infirmary (located in Dr. Masters'
office), so Dr. Masters checks everyone's rooms and finds the drugs
in Jennifer's bureau drawer (which would explain her schizophrenia).
Jennifer enters Dr. Masters' offices and sees the drugs on her desk,
but before she can steal them again, someone shoves her head on one
of those pointy note holders, which pierces her eye and goes into her
brain, killing her (what kind of Sanitorium has a pointy note
holder?). Sam finds phone repairman's Ray Daniel's body in a closet
(his throat has been cut) and Allyson freaks out. Allyson tells
Charlotte that Dr. Masters is actually a patient pretending to be a
doctor and that is why the phones are still not fixed. She will not
let anyone enter or leave the asylum alive. It seems that the inmates
have been running the asylum for some time now and inmate "Dr.
Masters" is the executioner. Judge Cameron tells Charlotte that
everyone voted and decided that she would be one of the inmates,
which will save her life from being murdered by Dr. Masters.
Charlotte naturally becomes concered and first asks Mrs. Callingham
if Dr. Masters cut out her tongue. She shakes her head yes. Screwball
loony Danny scares the shit out of Charlotte, so she runs upstairs to
Allyson's room, where Allyson is making love to Ray Daniels' corpse.
Allyson has a bloody face and says to Charlotte, "You shouldn't
interrupt us on our wedding night!" Charlotte is naturally
repulsed and gets the dry heaves, so she runs downstairs to Dr.
Masters' office and sees the body of Jennifer with the pointy note
holder still impaled in her eye. A bunch of other stuff happens that
leads to Charlotte trying to find Sam in the basement and discovering
the rotting body of Dr. Stephens. Dr. Masters then puts Charlotte on
a bed and tells Sam to kill her, but Sam likes Charlotte too much and
leads her outside to safety. Meanwhile, all the other patients, who
are carrying axes and knives, corner Dr. Masters in the bedroom and
begin chopping and stabbing away at her while she is lying on the bed
(if you look close enough, you can see one of the rubber axe blades
fall off the handle!). When Sam returns and sees what they have done
to his beloved Dr. Masters, he kills them all, their bodies in
different states of bloodiness. Sam goes downstairs to the kitchen,
cries and eats a Popsicle, his second favorite thing in the whole
world. The film ends with Mrs. Callingham saying directly to the
audience, "Get out! And never ever
come back!" (Still scary as fuck!). Sure the film is
hokey, but it has one of those regional sleaze factors not found in
many films. Brownrigg made all his films in Texas using Texas talent
and, for the most part, they were damn fine actors. I believe Gene
Ross was the most successful of Brownrigg's stock players, as he made
both independent productions (THE
LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK - 1972; ENCOUNTER
WITH THE UNKNOWN - 1973), Hollywood films (FRIDAY
THE 13TH: THE FINAL CHAPTER - 1984; THE
GOONIES - 1985; David Lynch's LOST
HIGHWAY - 1997) and plenty of TV episodes (including HILL
STREET BLUES in 1984 and CAGNEY
& LACEY in 1986). You can tell by his role as Judge
Cameron in this film that he had real talent. He is a murderer, who
we also feel pity for and he is not just a crazy mental patient
without a soul. Some of his scenes, especially his discussions with
Dr. Masters, are true forms of acting usually not found in films of
this type. Gene Ross is still alive today (at least at the time of
this review), but he hasn't done anything since 1999. Screenwriter
Tim Pope (his only screenplay) went on to be a successful director of
music videos, for musicians and bands such as Queen, The Cure, Men
Without Hats, The Pretenders, The Bangles, Iggy Pop, David Bowie, Ric
Okasek and even directed the movie THE
CROW: CITY OF ANGELS (1996). Originally released as THE
FORGOTTEN, the film did less than mediocre business. It was
only when Hallmark Releasing
(and American International Pictures) got a hold of it and renamed it DON'T
LOOK IN THE BASEMENT with their often-used tag line
"It's only a movie...It's only a movie..." did the film
take off and make bundles of money, none of which Brownrigg ever saw.
It was also later released as DEATH
WARD NO. 13 and THE
SNAKE PIT to get audiences to think they were watching new
films. I enjoyed this film no matter what title it was released
under. Out of all the U.S. VHS releases this film had, (from VCI
Entertainment [who also released a poor DVD] and VidAmerica,
Inc), the best looking edition would have to be from Gorgon
Entertainment, because the other editions are missing footage
(the VidAmerica edition looks to be the TV version, since it is
missing over seven minutes of footage). While none of the DVD
versions (Including the version in the VAULT
OF HORROR 10 MOVIE COMPILATION) look very good, the latest
offering from Film Chest does looked cleaned-up somewhat and some of
the scenes that were way too dark in other versions are now visible.
That's not a ringing endorsement, because it was obviously taken from
a beat-up film element, so how much more time would it have taken
them to make it widescreen instead of fullscreen? As soon as any
company releases a widescreen version, I will be the first on line to
buy it, because it is more than obvious that some information is
missing from the sides (and it is a very important film from my
teenage years). S.F. Brownrigg's (who passed away in 1996) son,
Anthony Brownrigg, made a reboot/sequel, DON'T
LOOK IN THE BASEMENT 2 in 2014 (co-starring Camilla Carr,
who is portraying a different character than the one who died in the
first film). It was a crowd-funded project and from what I hear it is
pretty bad. I'll hold my tongue until I actually see it (see my
review HERE), but a
film made 41 years after the original doesn't offer much hope. You
just cannot make cult films. They are created by audiences. A Film
Chest DVD Release. Rated R. NOTE: Now available in high
definition and in its original OAR from BrinkVision
as a double feature Blu-Ray with the limp sequel. UPDATE:
Code Red has joined forces with new label Dark
Force Entertainment to release a series of Blu-Ray double
features. The first double
feature Blu-Ray contains the LAST
HOUSE ON THE LEFT clone CHAOS
(2003) along with an anamorphic widescreen version of DON'T LOOK
IN THE BASEMENT!
DUNGEON
OF HARROW (1962)
- I haven't seen this film in over thirty five years. Oh, it's
been available
on video for years in various dupey, unwatchable editions. I should
know. I own most of them. Why haven't I viewed any of them? Because
this film scared the shit out of me when I saw it on TV in the middle
1960's as a pimply-faced kid. It introduced me to the horrors of
leprosy, a disease I had never heard of before watching this film. It
left an indelible impression on me, an impression that is as fresh
today as it was 50 years ago. That is why I won't watch any of the
video versions I own. I don't want to destroy my memories of that day
with a crappy, third or fourth generation copy. Imagine my surprise
of finding this film on DVD while doing one of my weekly trash film
runs at the local Best Buy. And it cost only $5.99! Released by
company Alpha Video, this DVD
contains the best-looking copy that you're likely ever to see of a
film of this vintage and pedigree (at the time of this review; things
have changed as you can read below). It's far from perfect, as the
colors have faded and the whole film has a brownish tint to it, but
it is watchable and therefore worth every cent it cost me. So, what's
the verdict? I am glad to report that my memories didn't deceive me
this time. As an adult, I can see that this is an impossibly cheap
film which opens with the lamest shipwreck ever committed to
celluloid (later, check out the rubber bat and giant toy spider),
contains acting that can politely be called wooden, has bad library
music and sets that are made of cardboard. But that just adds to its'
overall charm. On the plus side, there's a fair amount of blood for
an early '60's effort, some sadistic torture scenes and the last 20
minutes which involve a chained-up aristocrat being seduced by a
whacked-out leprosy-ridden Countess in a wedding dress. Want to know
more? Spend the six bucks and take this baby home. Directed by late
comic book artist Pat Boyette (who also directed the hard-to-find
films THE WEIRD ONES and NO
MAN'S LAND
[both also in 1962]) more in the vein of a filmed theatrical
production than an actual movie. The whole film looks and sounds like
a stage play with just enough outdoor locations (filmed in San
Antonio, Texas) to relieve the claustrophobic interior scenes.
Boyette (who also wrote this with Henry Garcia) also gives this film
a real downbeat ending, something unheard of in a film of its time.
I'm glad I waited all these years. It was euphoric reliving a memory
that made such an impact on my youth. Starring Russ Harvey (also the
film's producer), Helen Hogan, William McNulty, Michelle Buquor,
Maurice Harris and Eunice Grey as the leper Countess. Available from Alpha
Video, who have released a slew of public domain horror flicks
on DVD including: THE SCREAMING SKULL
(1958), NIGHT OF THE
BLOOD BEAST (1958), ATTACK
OF THE GIANT LEECHES (1959), BLOODLUST (1959), ATOM
AGE VAMPIRE (1960), CREATURE
FROM THE HAUNTED SEA
(1961), ANATOMY
OF A PSYCHO (1961), THE
BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS (1961), HANDS
OF A STRANGER (1962), THE
BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962 - the uncut version), CARNIVAL
OF SOULS - 1962, THIS
IS NOT A TEST - 1962, THE
STRANGLER OF BLACKMOOR CASTLE (1963), THE
LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964), SOUND
OF HORROR (1964), TERROR
CREATURES FROM THE GRAVE (1965), MANOS:
THE HANDS OF FATE (1966), NIGHT
FRIGHT (1967), GHOSTS
OF HANLEY HOUSE (1968), GRAVE
OF THE VAMPIRE (1972), THE
WEREWOLF OF WASHINGTON (1973), THE
EERIE MIDNIGHT HORROR SHOW (1974), the complete BLACK
COBRA series (1987 - 1990), exclusives like director Mark
Redfield's DR. JEKYLL
& MR. HYDE (2002), Philip Cook's DESPISER
(2002), exclusive deals with Ted
V. Mikels and Sam Sherman,
and many more, all in attractive and colorful sleeves and sturdy DVD
cases (although some of the prints are in less than stellar shape). DUNGEON
OF HARROW is also known as DUNGEON OF HORROR, though
in all my years searching for a good version of this film, I have
never seen it under that title. Not Rated. NOTE: For an
interview with the late Pat Boyette and an overview of his films,
check out the Astounding B Monster Web Site by clicking here
(you now have to buy their book to read something that was free for
years!). UPDATE: Label Vinegar
Syndrome put out an excellent widescreen version of the film on
a double
feature DVD with director Ken Friedman's DEATH
BY INVITATION (1971). It's worth picking up. Now if only
someone would release Boyette's other two films. Any takers? Vinegar
Syndrome has also released a double
feature DVD of the extremely rare (and, until now, considered
lost) THE SUCKERS (1972), a
sexually explicit version of THE
MOST DANGEROUS GAME (1932), and the lesbian sexploitationer THE
LOVE GARDEN (1971). They now release more straight and gay
porn than they do genre films, although every once in a while a good
one slips through, but I find their business practices somewhat questionable.
EQUINOX
(1967/70) - A
sense of nostalgia swept over me when I slipped this bootleg video
in my VCR. A favorite of mine when I was a young teen (in part, no
doubt, to the frequent times it was shown on TV in the early 70's),
this precursor to THE
EVIL DEAD
(1983) holds many surprises when viewed today. When Dave
(Edward Connell) is struck by a driverless car and rushed to the
hospital, he tells a frightening story to the staff psychiatrist. He
and three college friends travel to their professor's cabin in the
mountains to assist in a dig. They find the cabin destroyed and
discover a cave in which a laughing lunatic resides. He gives them an
ancient book filled with Latin writing and symbols. Dave recites a
passage which turns out to be the Lord's Prayer in reverse. Dave
accidentally kills the professor (who acts like a madman) after he
steals the book. Strange and mysterious things begin to happen. The
professor's body disappears. A castle appears and disappears on the
mountainside. Huge V-shaped footprints are found near the cabin. The
park ranger named Mr. Asmodeus (Jack Woods, who also wrote and
directed this version) tries to rape one of the girls but is twarted
by her crucifix necklace. Our quartet are up to their necks in deep
shit as they are chased by a huge ape-like monster, a giant caveman,
a flying demon and other supernatural menaces (including a rip in the
fabric of time), all trying to get their hands on that ancient book.
It was a joy to view this film for the first time in over 15 years.
When the TV showings dried up, the only way to see it was on video.
The only problem was that it was impossible to find (under this title
or as THE
BEAST
from Wizard Video,
it's alternate video title with a shorter running time). Made as a
college film in 1967 by effects master Dennis Muren as THE
EQUINOX...A JOURNEY
OF THE SUPERNATURAL, producer Jack H. Harris picked it up for
distribution, had Jack Woods direct some new scenes, recut and
reshuffled some scenes and released it to theaters in 1970 with the
shortened title EQUINOX. This film is a trivia buff's dream.
The excellent stop-motion effects were done by Dennis Muren, David
Allen and Jim Danforth (what a team!). Co-star Frank Boers Jr. is
actually Frank Bonner, who achieved minor fame as Herb on WKRP
IN CINCINNATI
(1978 - 1982). The assistant cameraman (on the second version) was Ed
Begley Jr., who would later reach stardom on ST.
ELSEWHERE
(1982 - 1986) and then turn himself into a pain-in-the-ass bike-riding
ecologist and conservationist. Noted author Fritz Leiber makes a
brief appearance as the nutty professor. Horror's biggest fan,
Forrest J. Ackerman, is the voice we hear on the tape. Not bad for a
no-budget flick, eh? This film does have many flaws. The characters'
clothing changes from scene to scene and the actors visibly grow
slightly older as the story progresses. This is due to the fact that
it took four years to finish the filming because of the intertwining
of the two versions. The beginning of the film is very choppy, either
because it was a bad print or because of producer Harris'
post-production tampering. That's just nitpicking though. I, for one,
just enjoyed the ride. As far as no-budgeters go, EQUINOX
shows much imagination and enthusiasm and deserves to be judged
by it's merits and not by its' slim budget. Sam Raimi owes a
big debt to this film as THE
EVIL DEAD
"borrows" a few of its' major plot points. Besides, how
could I bad-mouth a film which has brought back so many good
memories? Not
Rated.
Note: Turner Movie Classics (TMC) is now showing this film with a TV-PG
rating but it is the unedited 1970 second edition in much better
shape than the bootlegs. Tape it if you get the chance. Note Part 2 :
Now available as a special edition two DVD
as part of The Criterion Collection showing both versions of the
film. Yours truly
supplied some box art for the DVD's supplemental disc.
EVIL
RIVER (2016) - I must say my
faith in modern day Italian horror films has been restored, thanks to
this film and several others (such as THE
HAUNTING OF HELENA - 2012 and HOTEL
INFERNO - 2013). This gory supernatural horror film can best
be described as GROUNDHOG DAY
(1993) on LSD or one of your worst nightmares come to life. It's full
of very bloody practical effects, some sharp commentary on life and
death and everyone actually speaks English, so those of you who
rather not read subtitles while watching a film can relax and enjoy a
film that will actually make you think about what you would do if you
had to trade places with our heroine.
Our heroine is Emma (Margherita Remotti), a Professor of Womens
Studies at a university in Rome. She makes a long trip to the town of
Voghera, Italy to take a tour of an archaeological dig next to "Shanda's
River" (the original title of the film), named after a 14th
Century woman who was accused of being a witch and causing the deaths
of thousands of people, when they actually died of the Plague. The
superstitious townspeople banded together and drowned Shanda in the
river and ever since then there have been a series of strange murders
near the river where Shanda was killed, dubbed the "Red River
Murders", where the police believe there is a serial killer on
the loose. Could it be Shanda who is actually killing these people in
retribution for her death? On the long train ride to Voghera, Emma
has a dream where she sees Shanda (Marcella Braga; WRATH
OF THE CROWS - 2013) rip out her eyes with her own hands and
offer them to Emma. When she wakes up, Emma is at Voghera and waits
for someone to pick her up. While she is sitting on a bench, Emma
sees a strange symbol drawn
on the ground, a red outline of a circle with a solid red circle in
the middle if it. Emma doesn't know it, but she will see that symbol
many, many times during her stay in this strange town, but what does
it mean?
Emma is picked up by Giulia (Claudia Marasca; THE
BROKEN KEY - 2017), who will be her tour guide at the dig
site. She hands Emma a bottle of her wine, made from her family's
vineyard and takes Emma to her hotel room, telling her she will pick
her up tomorrow at 7:00 AM for the tour. Emma, who is very tired from
the long trip, immediately goes to bed and once again has the dream
of Emma ripping her eyes out and offering them to her. Emma wakes up
and it is 4:00 AM, so she takes a shower and waits for Giulia to pick
her up. Guilia knocks on her door at 7:00 AM and tells Emma that they
will have another person joining them on the tour, a Croatian
investigative reporter named Daniel Roth (Diego Runko), saying he
offered her so much money she couldn't say no, apologizing to Emma.
Daniel arrives and introduced himself to Emma and they make the drive
to the dig site. On the way, Giulia gives Daniel and Emma a short
history on Shanda and Emma interrupts and says her information is
wrong. Daniel asks Emma if she is a reporter, too, and she tells him
no, she's a Professor of Womens Studies who decided to write a book
on witches, only her book will be nothing but the truth, nothing made
up or sensationalized like Giulia's story. On the way to the dig
site, Giulia's car stalls and she gets out to check what the problem
is and notices that it is leaking oil. While she makes a phone call
to her brother to bring over his car for them to use and to call a
tow truck, Daniel and Emma get out of the car to offer some help.
Emma notices two strange people in black robes and very eerie demonic
masks walking towards them, so she warns Daniel to come back to the
car. One of the men knocks out Daniel and the other comes to the car
and knocks out Emma. When Emma wakes up, she discovers that she and
Daniel are tied to separate trees and on the tree opposite her is the
red symbol, seemingly painted in blood. One of the robed men walks up
to Daniel and disembowels him with a dagger, pulling out his offal
with his bare hands. He then walks over to Emma, says something in a
language Emma doesn't understand, makes her eat Daniel's guts (!) and
when she spits it out, he slices her throat (rather graphically) with
the dagger. Emma then wakes up in her hotel room and it's 4:00 AM.
She thinks it was nothing but a nightmare caused by drinking Giulia's
bottle of wine, so she goes to the bathroom, takes a shower and waits
for Giulia to arrive. Giulia arrives at 7:00 AM and tells Emma that
they will have another person joining them on the tour, a Croatian
investigative reporter named Daniel Roth. Uh, oh! Is Emma caught in
some time loop or is there another reason why this is happening? Emma
decides to go on the tour anyway and the same exact thing happens,
only this time when she wakes up tied to the tree, the robed man
kills Daniel and then walks over to her, mumbles something in a
strange language and bashes Emma's head in with his wooden staff.
Once again, Emma wakes up in her hotel room and it is 4:00 AM, but
this time when Giulia arrives at 7:00 AM, Emma tells her she is too
ill to go on the tour, so Giulia leaves. Thinking that she has
stopped the strange time loop, Emma relaxes and takes a shower, only
for the two robed men to break into her hotel room, once again
whispering something to her that she doesn't understand and then kill
her again. Once again she wakes up in her hotel room and it's 4:00
AM... To save time (and my slow typing skills), I will briefly tells
you the events that happen to Emma before she wakes up in her hotel
room at 4:00 AM. During each "time loop", Emma will learn
something that will aid her in stopping this nightmare once and for all::
Emma takes a shower and waits for the robed men to arrive. She kills one of the men and unmasks him, but the second man strangles her with a piece of rope after whispering something to her that she still doesn't understand. While she is dying she sees Shanda ripping out her eyes and she tells Emma, "You will never die."
This time, Emma decides to run away, only for the robed men to find her, but this time the man speaks English to her, telling Emma that they keep on killing her because she can never die. One of the men then kills Emma by bashing her head in with a brick.
Emma tries hanging herself in her hotel room, but she wakes up and it is again 4:00 AM.
Emma realizes that she cannot die in this time loop so she tries a different tactic. When Giulia arrives at her hotel room at 7:00 AM, Emma puts a plastic bag over her head and suffocates her. She tells a terrified Giulia not to worry, She will wake up and none of this would have ever happened. She will not even remember any of this. Emma is right.
Emma gets drunk at the hotel bar and steals a car from the parking lot. She drives to the underside of a bridge, smokes a cigarette and is then killed by the robed figure. Shandra then tells Emma that Daniel has the answer to why she cannot die.
Emma goes online with her laptop and watches a story on a serial killer that Daniel has posted. He shows the strange symbol (that Emma sees just before she dies in all her time loops) and Daniel says, "This symbol was used by a cult that found its roots in northern Italy and the southeast of France during the Middle Ages.They called themselves 'The Revenants' and they believed in a specific death ritual that could, with these symbols, trap a victim in a path of endless deaths. According to their belief, the victim of the sacrifice will undergo a hellish series of sacrifices, suffering over and over again, until the path of the symbol is completed, thus satisfying the cult deity. While digging for books and tomes within the archives of Milan's library, I found this drawing (holds up a drawing of a horned demon) depicting one of the masks they use to wear during their human sacrifices" (It is the same mask that the robed figures are wearing). One of the robed figures then enters Emma's hotel room and kills her once again (by graphically slicing her throat), only this time Emma is not scared, telling the cult member, "I'll see you today."
Emma
knocks on Daniel's hotel room door, but he doesn't know her
(Remember: They really haven't met yet!). She tells him about her
troubles and Daniel hands her a joint (!), telling her to end the
curse, the victim must offer their sacrifice willingly. Daniel tells
her it should be done at the archeological dig site at Shanda's
River, saying Emma should stay in his room tonight. Emma says what
the hell, she knows the cult will kill her, so she takes off her
clothes and makes love to Daniel (Talk about a non-committal
relationship, one he will never remember!). A short time later, the
cult members come to Daniel's hotel room, so Emma grabs Daniel's
pistol, points it at her head
and says, "It's better this way." Daniel says, "I
believe you", as she pulls the trigger.
The finale finds Emma traveling to the dig site at Shanda's River to
end this curse once and for all. She tells her story into a digital
tape recorder for someone to find, but will she be successful and
find peace in the afterlife, or will the cult members win? And is
someone Emma knows a member of The Revenants? This person accuses
Emma of being a witch, which Emma flatly denies, but is she lying?
Will she wake up again at 4:00 AM or is her life now finally over?
I'm afraid you are going to have to watch the film to get the answers
to those questions, but I will tell you this: The finale is very gory
and ends with a poignant sting. Look for a post-end credits stinger
that leaves the film wide open for a sequel, one that I will watch if
made. "Homo Homini Lupus!"
This excellent, thought-provoking horror flick, directed by Marco
Rosson (NEW ORDER - 2012,
with Franco Nero; and many music videos for bands you never heard of)
and written by Nicola Pizzi (His only feature film screenplay,
although he has worked in various capacities on several genre films,
including an Electrician on AT
THE DEVIL'S DOOR [2013], a Best Boy Grip on THE
CARETAKER [2016] and a Lighting Technician on Blumhouse's TRUTH
OR DARE? [2018]), surprised me several times and even
made me twitch during a certain jump scare (you'll know it when you
see it). The major plus this film offers is the performance by the
basically unknown Margherita Remotti, who imbues her character of
Emma with a real heart and soul. While she is not an example of a
beautiful woman by any stretch of the imagination, it was certainly a
delight seeing a naked woman who was all natural, not injected with
silicone or plastic to make her look like a "starlet".
She's a real woman and her performance is remarkable, especially when
she learns to accept her many deaths and how she deals with it. I
accidentally discovered this film while searching "Italian
Horror Movies" on Amazon Prime and this is one time the search
turned up a really great film, one that I can recommend to all my
readers, especially since it is free if you are a Prime member. I
love discovering unsung gems such as this and as I said before, it
restores my faith in modern day Italian genre films. Granted, there
is a lot of crap out there, but this isn't one of them! Also
featuring Toni Pandolfo (Dario Argento's DRACULA
3D - 2012) as a Police Inspector who questions Daniel at the
end of the film. If you are not a Prime member, this film can be
purchased on DVD from Wild
Eye Releasing. Not Rated.
GRAVEYARD
OF HORROR (1971) - This
Spanish Gothic horror film is so badly edited, it makes what's going
on very confusing, but, at the same time, gives the flick a surreal
tone that just can't be ignored. This film aired quite a lot on TV
back in the '70s, making many viewers shake their heads in
bewilderment, but has since sunk into a pit of obscurity, but I'm
here to pull it out of the quicksand of peat, give it a quick bath
and present it to you, rough edges and all.
The film opens with Michael Sherrington (Bill Curran; JAGUAR
LIVES! - 1979), the brother
of Robert, the Earl of Binbrook (a scientist working on experiments
involving the "transmutation of human cells"), digging up
the grave of his wife Elizabeth. After a quick flash-forward, where
Michael says, "I am leaving my ancestral home of Castle Binbrook
because I can no longer bear the silence of death", the film
then flashes-back a few days earlier to show us how Michael ended up
in this predicament. We see Michael arriving by train to his
ancestral home, expecting to see his wife Elizabeth (Inés
Morales, as "Senny Green"; THE
HOUSE OF PSYCHOTIC WOMEN - 1973), after being away on
business for a few months, hoping to be told he is now a father,
since Elizabeth was pregnant with his child. He is met at the train
station by Robert's wife, Lady Anne (Catharine Ellison), and his
niece, Margaret (Beatriz Elorrieta, as "Beatriz Lacy"; NIGHT
OF THE WEREWOLF - 1980), but not by his wife. When he asks
where Elizabeth is, Michael can see by the looks on Lady Anne and
Margaret's faces that it is not good news, yet all they will tell him
is that Elizabeth and her baby (a girl) are dead, but they will not
tell Michael how she died. Michael then goes to the house of his
mother-in-law, Barbara (María Paz Madrid, as "Yocasta
Grey"), but she tells her two daughters, Pamela (Marisa Shiero)
and Lily (Titania Clement; THE
SPECTER OF TERROR - 1973), not to answer the door, yet Lily
ignores her mother and lets Michael inside. Michael demands to know
how Elizabeth died and Barbara blames her death on him, saying his
job was more important than his marriage to her daughter, telling
Michael that Elizabeth died of a broken heart, waiting every day for
his letters to arrive, but they never did. Michael says that isn't
true, he wrote her every day he was away, but Barbara calls him a
liar, telling him if he wants to know how Elizabeth died, he should
talk to Dr. Kinberg (Antonio Jiménez Escribano; SCREAM
OF THE DEMON LOVER - 1970), who signed Elizabeth's death
certificate. When Michael goes to Dr. Kinberg's office, he refuses to
tell Michael how Elizabeth died, saying that Robert's personal
physician, Dr. Lexter (Frank Braña; PIECES
- 1982), was taking care of Elizabeth. Dr. Kinberg also tells Michael
that Dr. Lexter made him sign Elizabeth's death certificate and if he
wants to know how his wife died, to go to town hall and get a copy of
the death certificate. Why won't anyone tell Michael how his wife
really died? And where is Robert (Michael hasn't seen him since he
came back)? What are they hiding?
When Michael get a copy of the death certificate, it says that Dr.
Lexter had to perform a Caesarean section on Elizabeth to remove the
baby girl, which was stillborn and already dead. Elizabeth died
during the Caesarean because she was too weak. When Michael talks to
Dr. Lexter, he refuses to elaborate and Michael becomes very
suspicious, especially when Lexter won't tell him where Robert is
(All we hear is it will take six months before we know the truth
about Robert). Michael is even more determined to discover how his
wife died, especially to see if Robert had anything to do with it, so
he goes to family cemetery gravedigger Mr. Fowles (Victor Israel; HOUSE
OF INSANE WOMEN - 1971) and asks him to dig up Elizabeth's
coffin, but he refuses and tells Michael to leave immediately or he
will call the police. Michael has no other choice than to sneak into
the cemetery at night and dig up Elizabeth's coffin (bringing us to
the beginning of the film), but when he does, he finds her coffin
empty. There has been an unusually high amount of deaths in the
village recently, so Michael also digs up their coffins, also finding
them empty. Before he can report it to the police, two robed figures
wearing old men horror masks enter the cemetery and knock Michael
out, placing his unconscious body in a tomb next to a fresh mound of
dirt with medical tubing running into it; the dirt moving up and
down, as if to the beating of a heart. One of the robed figures
removes the tubing from the mound of dirt and walks away. When
Michael wakes up, he sees some type of monster arise from the dirt
(all we see are its eyes and hands), which attacks him.
The next day, Michael is reported missing (but we know he's alive,
thanks to the flash-forward in the beginning of the film, where he
has a cast on one foot and walks with the aid of a cane), but someone
is pretending to be him, playing Michael's favorite tune on his
harmonica (Michael always had it on him until Pamela stole it). It
wouldn't be too much of a give-away to state the person pretending to
be Michael is Police Inspector Harrison (John Clark; A
TOWN CALLED HELL - 1971), who is investigating the abnormal
amount of deaths in the village, all of their death certificates
being signed by Dr. Lexter and Dr. Kinberg. Some type of monster
attacks a young boy playing in the snow, mauling his foot. The more
Elizabeth's sisters hear Michael's tune being played on the
harmonica, secrets are revealed, such as Pamela and Lily having
lustful crushes on Michael and trying their damnest to get him into
bed, but with no luck, because he only loved Elizabeth. When it
is revealed that it was Pamela who stole all of Michael's letters to
Elizabeth before she could read them, we begin to semi-understand
what is going on and who this monster really is. Why is Inspector
Harrison pretending to be Michael? Why is Dr. Lexter murdering people
(also making Dr. Kinberg sign some of the death certificates) and
robbing Lady Anne of all Robert's wealth? Why does the monster eat
the bodies of the murdered people and only leave their heads uneaten?
It's all related in a very twisted way, which you will discover if
you make it to the film's finale without losing your mind.
The film plays like a 19th Century Gothic horror film and if it
weren't for some (very few) modern-day trappings (such as Michael's
car and
the train ride), you would swear it was taking place in the
late-1800's. Director/screenwriter "Michael Skaife" is
actually Miguel Madrid, director/writer of KILLING
OF THE DOLLS (1975) and one of the screenwriters of THE
FEAST OF SATAN (1971). Since this was Madrid's freshman turn
at directing (his resumé is very thin, as he only directed
three features and has six writing credits; he passed away in 1996),
it's obvious he was learning here, as none of the scenes seem to have
any connective tissue to what came before or after it, making it a
nightmare for editor María Luisa Soriano (CURSE
OF THE DEVIL - 1973; THE
MUMMY'S REVENGE - 1975) to make sense of. But that's exactly
what makes this film such a surreal experience. You may not
understand it, but you won't be able to take your eyes off the
screen. There are a lot of unanswered questions in the film, though,
the main one being: Why does Mr. Fowles bleach the skulls of the
monster's victims and leave them in the cemetery for a "Mr.
Skaife" (Madrid, in an inside joke cameo) to collect and hand
over to Dr. Kinberg? The only thing I can think of is that Fowles is
covering-up the monster's murders, but I can neither defend or refute
that theory, since Dr. Kinberg tells Inspector Harrison that one of
the skulls he is examining is Elizabeth's. If you are wondering
why we don't fully see the monster until the film's finale, it's
because it is a hoary creation; quite cheap-looking and laughable.
This film may not be everyone's cup of tea (what is?), but those in
the right frame of mind (you know who you are) will find much to
enjoy here, even if it's for all the wrong reasons.
Shot as NECROPHAGUS
and released in its native Spain under that title, it is also known
as THE
BUTCHER OF BINBROOK and a couple of more aliases (which I
will get to momentarily). The film received a theatrical release in
the United States (under the review title) from Sam Sherman's
Independent-International Pictures, which was then released on VHS
by Sherman's label Super
Video. All American Video (a division of Mogul
Communications) released it on VHS as NECROMANIAC
and it was also released on Spanish VHS as NECROFANIA.
Image Entertainment released it on DVD
(also under the review title) as part of their "EuroShock
Collection" in 2002. It's in fullscreen and it has yet to be
updated since then. Hey Code Red, are you listening? Also featuring
J.R. Clarke and Rosario Royo as an old lady sharing Michael's train
cabin. When her overhead bag starts dripping blood, it is revealed
she is keeping a dead chicken in it! Ah, elderly people from the
"Old Country"! Not Rated, but there's noting too
objectionable here; just some near-nudity and a little splashing of blood.
THE
HEADLESS EYES (1971) -
Besides having my favorite artwork on any VHS cover of all time (by
Wizard Video), this is a short mindfuck of a film that many people
put down (and I can see why), but it is still a grimy little horror
film about a man obsessed. The fact that it is badly edited, sound
recorded and has some of the most overwrought dialogue you will ever
hear delivered in a film, only adds to its twisted (you'll hear that
word again) charms. This strangely fascinating gore flick has the
production values of a porno flick from the time period, which should
come as no surprise, since Henri Pachard produced it using his common
pseudonym "Ronald Sullivan". Pachard directed over 360
films, 99% of them porno, before he passed away in 2008. It is the
first film directed and written by Kent Batemen, whose next film
would be the
G-Rated THE LAND OF NO RETURN
(1978), starring William Shatner and Mel Tormé, but he is
better known as the father of actors Jason & Justine Bateman and
even worked on some of his kids' TV shows and movies in various
capacities. I wish he would have stuck with films like this because,
as bad as it is, it still holds up today in sheer weirdness. It's
like hallucinating without the use of illegal drugs. The film opens
with basically unknown artist Malcolm (Bo Brundin; who had a major
role in Jerry Lewis' notoriously unreleased film THE
DAY THE CLOWN CRIED - 1972) breaking into a woman's
apartment to steal her valuables. The woman wakes up and starts
screaming, so Malcolm puts his hand over her mouth (while saying he
needs $65.00 to pay the rent!). The woman reaches for a teaspoon off
her night table and scoops-out Malcolm's left eye (there a bad edit
here where Malcolm has his hand over his eye [edit] and then it
starts to bleed through his fingers) and he screams "My eye!
AIEEE!" while he stumbles out of the apartment building via the
fire escape and we see his eye hanging out of its socket (his screams
are looped at least a half dozen times). He falls to the New York
City sidewalk, where a group of people gather around him to gawk (We
see it from his POV as the camera looks up from the pavement and the
screen turns red just as Kent Bateman's credits are shown on the
screen. None of the other three actors listed are given character
names and there are no end credits, so the rest of the cast's
fictional and real names are guesses on my part). A couple of years
later, the eyepatch-wearing Malcolm runs a small art store and it is
obvious that he is quite mad and obsessed with eyes, as the camera
pans over one of Malcolm's paintings of an eye, then a set of real
eyes encased in lucite and, finally, a shot of Malcolm's hands
performing some home surgery on a human eyeball (he even has a mobile
hanging from his ceiling made of nothing but human eyeballs!).
Malcolm has visions of blood flowing over a human eye, so he goes to
his refrigerator, pulls out a container from his freezer and runs hot
water over it until we see that there was an eye encased in the ice
(perhaps his own?). It's quite apparent that Malcolm is crazy as a
loon and has been killing people for their eyes, as he talks to
himself (Brundin's Swedish accent only adds to the creepiness). An
old drunk couple spot him through his store window that night and
make fun of his artwork, so he follows them back to their apartment
and bashes them both over the head until they are dead. Malcolm then
sits in their rocking chair, as we are treated to another one of his
POV shots when we see the camera moving up and down looking at the
couple's bloody corpses while Malcolm rocks in the chair. When he
exits the apartment building, a hooker notices his bloody hand and
takes him back to her apartment to patch it up. Malcolm uses one of
her kitchen knives to stab her in the throat and, while she is still
alive holding her throat, he puts her in the bathtub and turns on the
shower, watching her die as her blood goes down the drain (Hitchcock
this ain't!). We then see Malcolm reading a newspaper, where an
obviously pasted-on headline reads POLICE BAFFLED. "EYE"
KILLER SLAYS 14TH. He is then visited by his longtime ex-lover Anna
(Kelley Swartz), who calls him "Mal" and has traveled from
some expensive place other than NYC (she is loaded with money) to see
how he is doing. It seems the last two years they lived together was
a living hell for her and she accuses Mal of still living in a
fantasy world. She left NYC after they broke up and now thinks Mal is
incurable. Malcolm doesn't disagree and even says this about himself:
"Because I am twisted. Because I want to find out something.
Because I am sick!" He also tells Anna, "I didn't just lose
an eye. Something happened." Anna offers to help Malcolm with
the best doctors money can buy, but he goes on a long rant about his
past and how he sold his first painting and was able to treat Anna to
dinner for the first time with his own money, all the while holding a
pair of human eyes encased in lucite. Anna becomes frightened and
leaves, while Malcolm stares into the nothingness that his life has
become. We then see a TV reporter interviewing people on the street
while waiting for Malcolm's 13th victim (who only had one of her eyes
removed) to be brought out of a funeral home in a casket and put in a
hearse. Malcolm is in the crowd, while the reporter asks the
wisecracking detective (Gordon Ramon) in charge of the case if there
have been any developments. The detective replies, "Yeah, there
have been developments. If you want to call victim #14 a development.
There's nothing obvious about this guy. Nothing sticks out (Really?).
Let's hope we get him before he makes it #15." When the
detective calls the killer a "pervert", Malcolm flashes
back to when he killed victim #13 on a building rooftop while she was
hanging laundry. He kills her and only gets the chance to remove one
of her eyes as he hears footsteps coming up the stairs. He beats a
hasty retreat, not forgetting that he didn't have the time to remove
her other eye. After listening to the reporter for a short time,
Malcolm leaves and walks down the street, where an old woman in a
chair (she is quite the sight) looks at him and repeatedly says,
"I know who did it!" Malcolm becomes freaked-out and begins
running through the streets (giving us a great glimpse of early-70's
NYC) until he happens upon a beautiful blonde woman brushing her
hair. Malcolm follows her to a modeling agency on the 9th floor of a
highrise building, where he cracks open the door and watches her doff
her top while showing the agent her photo portfolio (We don't get to
see her her topless. As a matter of fact, there is absolutely no
nudity in this film. Very weird.). Both Malcolm and the blonde woman
wait for the elevator for what seems like an eternity (And Malcolm
couldn't make it any more obvious that he is following her since he
is standing about ten paces to the side of the elevator door!). Once
they get out of the elevator, the blonde woman runs to her boyfriend
(pimp?) and she points out Malcolm to him, but they end up just
driving away. Malcolm decides to sneak into the modeling agency to
get the blonde woman's address, which he does, but he is caught by
the receptionist who returns back from lunch (She flips open his
eyepatch and Malcolm says, "Pretty, isn't it?"). Malcolm
strangles her with her own huge chain necklace (we see her feet off
the floor) and gouges out both her eyes with a special spoon he keeps
in its own black velvet pouch (!), making her victim #15, while
saying, "I'm sorry! You'll never have to worry again!". He
brings her eyeballs home and puts them in the container in his
freezer. Malcolm really begins to lose it and fantasizes about
walking the empty streets of NYC, ending up at the huge locked doors
of St. Patrick's Cathedral. Someone leaves a note under Malcolm's
door, it saying that his artwork is unique and hopes that they can
meet. It is signed simply "A Friend". Malcolm drives to a
graveyard and digs up victim #13 and removes the eye he failed to get
when he killed her (Now that's dedication!). The detective is waiting
there for him and catches him in the act. All Malcolm can say is,
"I'm twisted!" to which the detective replies, "You've
twisted me into a big fat promotion!" Somehow (I'm still not
sure how he did it) Malcolm manages to get the drop on the detective
(who is holding a gun) and beats him to death with his shovel.
Malcolm meets the note-writer, who turns out to be a young long
black-haired female named Gigi (Mary Jane Early) and she wants
Malcolm to teach her his
"technique". Malcolm is reluctant until Gigi tells him that
she hangs out by a lighthouse under the George Washington Bridge
because she doesn't get along with most people. Malcolm agrees to
meet her there the next morning and they strike up a friendship
because Malcolm finds her eyes "different". He has finally
found a like-minded soul and she hands him an invite to an art
gallery showing (it's hand-drawn and quite lousy) which he says he
will meet her there on Saturday. But first, Malcolm follows the
blonde model (who turns out to be a drug mule) and traps her in a
freezer at a meat packing plant. He strangles her, removes her eyes
and puts them in his pocket, only to discover that the freezer has
locked behind him and he is trapped. When the workers open the
freezer door the next day, they discover Malcolm frozen stiff (He has
also written something on the freezer door in blood which contains
his name, but I couldn't quite make the rest of it out, even when
going through the scene frame-by-frame on the DVD.), while we hear
Malcolm's voice saying over-and-over, "I'm not finished!"
THE END. I know I should really despise this film because of
the lack of nudity (which is strange since Henri Pachard produced
it), the loose ends (What happens to Gigi and what is in that white
paper bag she is always carrying?) and all the technical faults, but
it is just so damn weird, I just can't help myself in loving it. It
is about as sleazy as a film can get (and it did obtain a theatrical
release, no matter what the retro Wizard Video "Too Gory For The
Silver Screen" promo says, which is included on the DVD and
brings back many memories) and Bo Brundin is just as crazy as any
actor can get portraying Malcolm. Kent Bateman has gone on record
saying that Henri Pachard wanted more blood and gore in the movie and
filmed some more bloody footage after the film was finished (the
blood flowing over the eyeball looks like one of those inserts) and
Bateman didn't know a thing about it until he saw a showing of the
film in a theater. Even with the extra footage, the film only runs 78
minutes, so it doesn't overstay its welcome. It is full of gory
eyeball removal scenes and they are not professionally done, but
somehow they fit in perfectly with the rest of the film. It was
originally released on VHS by Wizard
Video in that distinctive artwork (Which Charles Band also used
in the VHS release of his awful film THE
KILLER EYE - 1998) and then released on DVD
by Charles Band as part of his "Full
Moon's Grindhouse Collection" (I would advise you to watch
Band's skippable 10 minute intro before viewing the film because it
is damn funny and informative at the same time.). I have read where a
lot of people complain that it is the same fullscreen VHS transfer as
the one on Wizard Video (which was, and still is, owned by Band), but
since I own both of them, I can tell you that the DVD is much clearer
and the sound is much better. Hell, it only cost me ten bucks, so I
wasn't demanding perfection (and I didn't get it), but the transfer
(taken from a 16mm print) suits this grimy film just fine. Maybe
someday we will see a clear widescreen transfer of this film on disc
(but I wouldn't wait for it), but until then, this DVD will do. A Full
Moon Direct DVD Release. Not Rated, but it was Rated R in
theaters (probably edited from the original X-Rating it received by
the MPAA).
HEADSPACE
(2005) - What would happen if you could harness the dormant part
of your brain, that no human being has been able to tap into? This
mindfuck of a film is not only challenging to the viewer, its payload
is very satisfying.
A blood-covered Alex Borden (Christopher Denham; CAMP
HELL - 2011) walks into a park dressed in nothing but a
hospital gown. The film then flashes back to when Alex was a boy to
begin to explain how he ended up in this predicament. During his
older brother's birthday, their mother (a cameo by Sean Young; BLADE
RUNNER - 1982) starts bleeding from the nose. That night,
their father (Larry Fessenden, director of WENGIGO
[2001] and many other thought-provoking horror films) grabs Alex and
his brother and puts them in his truck, while their mother walks
towards them with a butcher knife in her hand. Dad grabs a shotgun
and approached Mom, saying she can stop this, it is not her fault.
She tries to stab Dad, forcing him to shoot her in the face (a very
gory effect). Was Mom crazy or are other forces at play?
A few years later, we see that Alex is a troubled teen, as he walks
in a park to collect his thoughts. He sees a man playing chess and he
invites Alex to partake in a game. Alex says he hates chess, but he
plays a game anyway and loses quickly. The man's name is Harry
Jelenik (Erick Kastel; OFFSPRING
- 2009) and he shakes Alex's hand, telling Alex that he will teach
him the finer points of the game. Before they can play another game,
Alex suffers from what seems to be a huge migraine headache and
excuses himself. Alex doesn't know it (yet), but every time he has
one of these "headaches", something bad happens and someone
dies bloodily. Alex is housesitting for an aquaintence and when his
best friend, Jason (Paul Sparks; MIDNIGHT
SPECIAL - 2015), pays him a visit, he finds Alex on the
floor, passed out after suffering from one of his headaches. Jason
calls an ambulance and Alex is taken to the hospital, where Dr. Ira
Gold (William Atherton; THE GIRL
NEXT DOOR - 2007) tells his associate, Dr. Denise Bell (Dee
Wallace Stone; CUJO - 1983), that
Alex uses more of his frontal lobe for cognitive activity than anyone
who has ever been charted. He tells Dr. Bell not to release Alex,
even though Dr. Bell says that medically, he's fine. Dr. Gold
is more interested in Alex's abilities than his medical condition,
telling Dr. Bell, "His chart alone is worth tens of thousands in
study grants." When Dr. Bell tells him she has no other choice
but to release Alex, Dr. Gold half-jokingly says, "I suppose a post-mortem
autopsy is out of the question?", which Dr. Bell does not find
funny. Dr. Gold is adamant on keeping Alex in the hospital and runs
more tests on him, but they aren't medical tests, they're to see how
intelligent Alex is. It turns out that Alex is a few steps above a
genius and he also has super-hearing, telling Dr. Bell he heard Dr.
Gold's "post-mortem" remark and all this new intelligence
is something he doesn't want. Dr. Bell sends Alex to psychiatrist Dr.
Karen Murphy (Olivia Hussy; BLACK
CHRISTMAS - 1974), who promises Alex that she will find out
what happened to him.
Alex then goes to Harry's apartment to play some chess, admires
Harry's paintings (Harry paints live nude women and places them in
nightmarish scenes) and notices him popping some prescription pills.
Alex asks what the medication is and Harry says his doctor told him
he needs it to "put some hair on my chest." Harry is
obviously lying, but why? We then see Dr. Gold in his office late at
night, when he is attacked and killed by some creature with very
sharp claws. Alex then goes to Jason's home, looks into a window and
spies on Jason and his girlfriend, Stacy (Pollyanna McIntosh; LET
US PREY - 2014), making love. He then suddenly has one of
his attacks and runs back to the home he is housesitting, where he
plays some heavy metal music to drown-out the thoughts he is having,
while news on TV reports of Dr. Gold's mutilation murder. Alex lies
down in bed and stares at the ceiling, not noticing a strange mist
swirling under his closed bedroom door. What does this mean?
At one of his sessions, Alex asks Dr. Murphy to pick out a book from
her library, which she does. Alex scans the book quickly by flipping
through the pages and asks her to pick out a page. When Alex quotes
the page verbatim, Dr. Murphy is quite shocked, but now she knows
what she is dealing with. Alex is drawn to his new friend Harry like
a moth to a flame, but is Harry really his friend? That night, Alex
is attacked by the clawed creature, but escapes. The same can't be
said of Sammy (Patrick Wang) and Lloyd (James Spruill), two park
chess players who don't like Alex (They confronted Alex earlier in
the day, telling him that he must play both of them before he can
play Harry again), as they are attacked and killed by the creature in
a public bathroom. The next day, Alex tells Dr. Murphy about being
attacked by the creature and shows her the claw marks on his chest
and stomach as proof, but she believes that Alex's wounds are
self-inflicted. They then hear about Sammy and Lloyd's murders on the
radio and Alex says, "I killed them!" before running out of
Dr. Murphy's office. Alex goes to Harry's apartment, where Harry is
drunk and grieving over Sammy and Lloyd's deaths, saying he can't
believe a "beast" mutilated both of them. Harry and Alex
play a game of chess, where Alex wins quite quickly. It's Harry's
first loss in over three years and demands that Alex plays another
game. Alex has another one of his attacks, only this time he sees his
father sign over the legal rights to Alex and his brother to the
State. The father has only one condition and before we can hear what
it is, Alex wakes up and bolts from Harry's apartment. Alex goes to
Jason's house and tells him and Stacy what is happening to him. He
says, "Things from Hell are after me. I know that sounds.. that
sounds whatever, but...I can't call the doctors because they'll put
me in a straight-jacket. I can't...I can't sleep because there's a
fucking monster in my closet. And I have this headache because I know
things. I know a million things that I have no idea how I know them.
I'm mastering the game of chess; I'm reading Cervantes; I know these
things!" He then tells them, "I know you fucked an hour
ago" and then says to Jason, "Your brother doesn't know
that you talked your father into changing his will." He then
turns to Stacy and says, "You say that you're true to Jason, but
when you wanted a raise at work, you flashed your supervisor your
tits!" Stacy tells Jason that it isn't true, but Alex says it is
and she even let her supervisor feel her up. Jason tells Alex to
leave his house, so Alex gets up and leaves, but not before saying,
"Yeah, I didn't think you could help me."
Alkex then goes to a priest, Reverend Karl Hartman (Udo Kier; MARK
OF THE DEVIL - 1970), and asks for help. Rev. Hartman at
first thinks that Alex is an alcoholic, but when he starts bleeding
from the nose, the creature thrusts its clawed hand through Rev.
Hartman's back and out his chest and then rips his face off! Alex has
no other choice but to leave the church quickly. Do you think you
know what is going on here? If you don't want to know a major
spoiler, DO NOT read the following: WARNING SPOILERS!!!
Alex meets a Russian man named Boris Pavlovsky (Mark Margolis; INFESTED
- 2002), who tells Alex that he is a "Link"; a guinea pig
at the Soviet Institute of Metaphysical Science, where, as a
child, he was taught to use the part of his brain other humans
cannot. It turns out the Institute had many Links, which were
supposed to help Russia during the Cold War as Sleepers, but when the
Cold War ended and the Wall came down, the project was ended. Boris
also tells him that when two Links get together, it's like a
"psychic laser"; everyone they touch dies violently. Oh,
and Alex's brother was also a Link. remember when I told you that
Alex's father had one condition before he would turn over his sons to
the State?That condition was that Alex and his brother are to be
separated and never have contact with each other again. there was a
reason why Alex's brother was never given a first name in the
flashbacks. It's because his brother's name was...Harry! can Alex
resolve this before it becomes even more deadly? END
OF SPOILERS!!!
This excellent psychological horror film is the directorial debut of
Andrew van den Houten, whose only other feature film is the previously
mentioned OFFSPRING
(2009). He is basically a producer of some interesting B-horror
films, such as the previously mentioned THE
GIRL NEXT DOOR (2007), THE WOMAN
(2011), GHOUL (2012) and ALL
CHEERLEADERS DIE (2013). This was also the acting debut
ofChristopher Denham, who gives a finely nuanced performance as Alex.
You can see his transformation as soon as he shakes hands with Harry.
Denham would later direct and write the unnerving horror films HOME
MOVIE (2008; produced by Andrew van den Houten.) and PRESERVATION
(2014), both worth seeking out. This film, written by Steve Klausner
and William M. Miller (who was also this film's cinematographer), is
like a huge jigsaw puzzle and the pieces we are given throughout
don't seem to fit anywhere, but when we get to the film's conclusion,
we realize that the pieces fit perfectly. The hectic, fast-paced
editing is a perfectly effective realization of what is going on in
Alex's brain. Anyone who has suffered through a fever dream while
running a high body temperature will sympathize with Alex, as his
brain is working overtime in overdrive., where nothing seems to make
much sense, but that's because Harry has awoken something long
dormant in Alex that he hasn't experienced since he and Harry were
children. The film keeps the viewer off-balance and mystified,
questioning what is going on, but if you give this film your full
attention (turn off your phone, quit texting and stop surfing the
Internet), you will be able to solve the mystery before the film's
final reveal. All the clues are there, some overt and some cleverly
disguised, making this film a good bet for both horror and mystery
fans. While not extremely bloody or gory, the killings are very well
done, especially Sammy & Lloyd's murders in the public restroom,
which is an excellent primer on how to build suspense. The film also
has more than its share of female nudity, especially by Jason's
girlfriend Stacy and a couple of Harry's female models.
I originally viewed this film on pay cable station Showtime early in
2006 and instantly regretted not recording it, as it had a strange
effect on me, quite unlike most films I watch. It was never aired
again, so I basically forgot about it, that is until I discovered it
streaming on Amazon Prime in a "Director's Cut". I can't
tell you how it differs from the original edit, but I will tell you
it affected me the same way as when I originally watched it in 2006.
Isn't that what all good films should do? Many attempt it, but few
succeed, so put this film on your must-see list. Just don't forget to
give it your full attention and enjoy this engrossing movie with a
perfect title. Also featuring Paula Kelly, David Austin, Mercedes
Renard and Quinn Lujan & Daniel Manche as Young Alex & Young
Harry. Rated R.
HOLOCAUST
2000 (1977) - "You
have generated something that is not human!" This
Italy/United Kingdom co-production is one of many films to mimic THE
OMEN (1976) and, in my opinion, is one of the best, thanks
to a roster of actors not known for appearing in films of this type
and the deft direction by Alberto De Martino (THE
BLANCHEVILLE MONSTER - 1963; THE
KILLER IS ON THE PHONE - 1972; THE
TEMPTER - 1974; FORMULA
FOR A MURDER - 1985; and many others). Playing on such
late-'70s fears as the Energy Crisis and Nuclear Power Plants, this
film manages to toss-in the Antichrist and the
Apocalypse into the plot, as well as some gruesome, bloody deaths,
making this film a treat for supernatural horror and thriller fans alike.
Industrialist Robert Caine (Kirk Douglas; THE
FURY - 1978) is about to realize his dream of building the
world's largest nuclear power plant in the Middle East's Holy Land to
combat the world's energy crisis. With the approval of the country's
Prime Minister (Ivo Garrani; ATOM
AGE VAMPIRE - 1960), Robert brings the Press on a tour of
the land on which he plans to build the plant. A female photographer,
Sara Golan (Agostina Belli; NIGHT
OF THE DEVILS - 1972), catches Robert's eye and he shows her
a cave where the word "IESVS"
is carved into a boulder. Robert tells her that the word actually
says "JESUS", since in
ancient times this country's language didn't contain the letter
"J". Sara is fully aware of this and says that Robert may
have found the "Cave of Prophecies", so she takes a photo
of him standing next to the boulder, a photo which will haunt Robert
for the rest of his life. It will also mean the death of anyone
important enough to stop the building of the nuclear power plant. At
a party at Robert's house for the Prime Minister, where a throng of
people are protesting the building of the plant (They chant,
"What do our children want to be when they get older?"
"Alive!"), a strange Arab man (Massimo Foschi; JUNGLE HOLOCAUST
- 1976) sneaks into the party and tries to kill Robert with a knife,
but Robert's son, Angel (Simon Ward; FRANKENSTEIN
MUST BE DESTROYED - 1969), wrestles with the man and
accidentally kills his mother, Eva (Virginia McKenna; De Martino's BLOOD
LINK - 1983), by ripping open her stomach with the knife. It
is apparent Eva, Robert's wife, never cared for Angel and we will
find out why as the film progresses.
At Eva's funeral, Robert notices that Angel doesn't seem sad at all
and asks him why. Angel replies that his mother always treated him
cruelly and doesn't understand why. Robert tells him that he once had
a twin brother, but he died during childbirth and Eva was never the
same after that. Robert doesn't tell Angel the reason why, something
else we will discover as the film progresses. At the cemetery, Sara
pays Robert a visit and hands him the photo she took of him in the
Cave of Prophecies, but instead of him posing in front of the word IESVS,
he stands in front of a carving of the "Dragon of the
Apocalypse", a seven-headed creature which bears a remarkable
likeness to the nuclear power plant he intends to build (Robert can
no longer go to the cave because he blew it up to clear the grounds
for construction of the power plant). Angel begins to take an
interest in the power plant's construction, much to Robert's
surprise, but his interest is constructive and informative, which
pleases his father. Angel tells Robert that the Prime Minister has
been voted out of office and the new Prime Minister, Harbin (Spyros
Focas; FLAVIA THE HERETIC
- 1974), is dead set against the power plant being built. Robert
flies out to talk to him, but Harbin says the plant will never see
construction, not just on moral grounds, but for religious reasons,
too, handing Robert a report on the reason why he is rejecting the
power plant. One of the reason in the report states that the ten
safety features in the plant are not good enough and must be studied
to verifiy they will never fail, so Robert has his head computer guy,
Professor Griffith (Anthony Quayle; A
STUDY IN TERROR - 1965), enter all the data into the
computer to see if Harbin is correct. The computer
"malfunctions", spitting out the code "2v231"
(2 to the square root of 231) and Robert tells Griffith to figure it out.
While on a plane ride, a priest named Father Charrier (Romolo Valli; BARBARELLA
- 1968) notices Robert looking at the computer code and he laughs,
telling Robert he saw the code in reverse, which reads "IESVS".
Robert, who is an Agnostic, goes to Father Charrier's home and
learns that the Devil's mark is Jesus' name in reverse, as a matter
of fact, everything the Devil does is the reverse of what Jesus does
(Example: Instead of Jesus' 12 Disciples, the Devil has 21. And so
on.). Charrier schools Robert in the ways of the Bible, showing him
ancient drawings of the Dragon of the Apocalypse and the signs of the
Antichrist, which is said to have been born or will be born in the
latter half of the 20th Century. "The Antichrist will be the
second son", says Charrier. Even though Robert is a
non-believer, some of what Charrier says seems to hit a nerve and
they become fast friends. Robert and Sara start a relationship, which
soon becomes sexually intimate (She reveals that she works for
Harbin). Angel tells Robert that Harbin is making a surprise visit to
Geneva, Switzerland to announce his plans to not build the power
plant on his country's land. Robert seems defeated, but Angel tells
him that everything will work out, not to worry, the plant will be
built. As everyone watches live television footage of Harbin stepping
off the plane in Geveva, a large gust of mysterious wind blows
through the airport and Harbin has the back of his head sliced off by
the spinning blade of a helicopter, killing him instantly (it's quite
the sight!). Now back in business, Robert doubles his efforts, with
Angel's help, to build the power plant in the Holy Land, but when
Sara announces she is pregnant and it will be a boy, Robert takes
Father Charrier's words to heart, thinking that the baby boy may be
the Antichrist, since it will be his second son (he's not really
thinking this out, is he?). Robert wants Sara to talk to Father
Charrier, but she will not enter a church, which makes Robert even
more suspicious. Robert wants Sara to abort the baby, but she won't,
leaving him and going to live with Angel secretly, behind Robert's
back (Angel seems happy the baby is being born).
Professor Griffith figures out that the mysterious computer code is
actually a number to a medical file of one of the company's
employees. Griffith calls up Robert and says, "Caine, you have
generated something that is not human!", telling him to meet him
in the computer room immediately. While Robert is going there, we see
the computer room going bonkers, which results in Griffith being cut
in half by a rapidly falling glass door. Robert checks out the
computer room for clues to Griffith's mysterious phone call and
discovers a secret message Griffith put into the computer, which says
that Angel is not human. Robert finally figures out that Angel is the
Antichrist, telling Father Charrier that Angel was actually his
second son. It turns out that Angel's umbilical cord strangled his
twin brother and Eva believed it was done on purpose by Angel, which
is why she never treated him like a son. Robert goes to confront
Angel, but before he does, he hands Charrier a letter, saying if he
doesn't return, to deliver it to Geneva, it's his letter rejecting
the building of the power plant. Robert then confronts Angel and he
doesn't deny anything, telling his father that he looks forward to
the end of the world in the near future and that he will kill his new
baby boy at "his convenience." Robert tries to strangle
Angel, but some guards pull him off and commit him to an insane
asylum, the same place where the strange Arab man was placed when he
tried to kill Robert. The Arab man then kidnaps Robert, who is in a
strait-jacket, and rolls him into a padded cell, where all the other
crazy patients are waiting to kill him. They pile on Robert and begin
biting him, but Robert escapes from his strait-jacket and kills the
Arab man by bashing his head in with a piece of the gurney (very
bloody, but quick). At the same time, Father Charrier hops on a small
plane headed for Geneva, pretending to be Robert Caine, but the plane
refuses to leave the ground, hitting a wall and exploding, killing
everyone on board. Robert escapes from the asylum and goes to the
nursery ward of a hospital where Sara delivered her baby. Just as a
nurse is about to give all the baby's in the ward some poison (but
not on purpose), Sara takes her baby from the crib and saves him,
while all the other babies die in front of her and Robert. We then
see Angel, the new head of the company, which now has 21 board
members (instead of the usual twelve) praising his dead father (he
mistakenly believes he died in the plane crash) and saying the
nuclear power plant will complete construction and go into operation
on his 33rd birthday. The open ending finds Robert, Sara and their
baby living in exile, waiting for the world to end. Is that not the
way you remember this film ending? Well there's a reason for that
(read on).
Made in Italy as HOLOCAUST
2000, but when American International purchased rights for
this film in North America, they renamed it THE
CHOSEN, re-edited it and hastily assembled a new ending
where we see Robert arrive by plane in Geneva and blow up the
building where Angel and his new board members are having their
meeting, killing everyone, including Robert and Angel. I guess A.I.P.
didn't think audiences in America would accept the film's original
open ending, but it works in this film (especially when compared to
A.I.P.'s hoary ending, which looks to be assembled from other films,
as we never see Robert blowing-up the building, just a pair of hands
assembling the bomb and then a building exploding). Director Alberto
De Martino, who also gave us MEDUSA
VS. THE SON OF HERCULES (1963); THE
MAN WITH ICY EYES (1971); CRIME
BOSS (1972); COUNSELOR
AT CRIME (1973); STRANGE
SHADOWS IN AN EMPTY ROOM (1976) and MIAMI
HORROR (1985), co-wrote this film's complex screenplay with
Sergio Donati (THE
WEEKEND MURDERS -
1970; MEAN FRANK AND
CRAZY TONY - 1973; and TOO
BEAUTIFUL TO DIE - 1988), which is ripe with numerical
puzzles, vicious deaths and even a bit of full-frontal nudity from
Kirk Douglas (!), who has a nightmare where he is naked and being
chased by the strange Arab man across a beach, when he suddenly sees
his power plant rise from the ocean and turn into the Dragon of the
Apocalypse. It's a strange, surreal sequence and, yes, we do get a
peek at Kirk's penis (but not in the American version)! Be aware that
what I described in this review is just a small portion of what is
actually going on, but it's best if you discover that for yourself. I
should also say that Ennio
Morricone's music score is very good here, full of choral chants
and orchestrations that evoke the supernatural events happening on
screen. This is no small-budget affair, as the film has a gloss and
sheen not usually seen in most Italian genre films and it is highly
apparent that most of the budget is on-screen. The photography is
opulent, the acting very good and the violence very bloody. What more
could you ask for?
Also known as RAIN
OF FIRE and LUCIFER'S CURSE, this film made its U.S. VHS
debut from Vestron
Video under the review title, but it is actually the abbreviated
A.I.P. American version. The European version made its U.S. debut on
DVD courtesy of Lionsgate Entertainment
under the RAIN
OF FIRE title, but it is in the wrong aspect ratio (1.78:1)
that cuts off some important information on the top, bottom and sides
of the screen. If you want to see the film as it was intended, in its
proper OAR (2.35:1) with the original ending, you need to get the Scream
Factory Blu-Ray,
which is available under THE CHOSEN
title (thankfully, there's a reverse
sleeve under its original title). Also available on the Blu-Ray
is the complete A.I.P. version with the alternate ending, but it's in
the 1.78:1 aspect ratio. There's not much in the way of extras on the
disc, just a theatrical and TV trailer, but getting both versions of
the film is a real treat. While many of the actors in this film are
no longer with us, it is amazing to say that Kirk Douglas still is
(at the time of this review) and is fast approaching his 103rd
birthday! Also featuring Alexander Knox (CRACK
IN THE WORLD - 1965), Geoffrey Keen (BERSERK
- 1967), Vittorio Fanfoni (BEYOND
THE DOOR - 1974), Sergio Serafini (SHORT
NIGHT OF GLASS DOLLS - 1971), Omero Capanna (CONTRABAND
- 1980), Peter Cellier (De Martino's THE
PUMAMAN - 1980) and an extended cameo by Adolfo Celi (WHO
SAW HER DIE? - 1972) as Dr. Kerouac, the head of the insane
asylum. The European version is Not Rated, while A.I.P.'s
version is Rated R.
THE
HORRIBLE DR. HICHCOCK (1962) -
It would be hard to write this review without telling you why
Professor Bernard Hichcock is so "horrible." In today's
society, it isn't that shocking, as TV series like LAW
& ORDER: SVU show us every type of sexual proclivity or
deviancy imaginable, but I can assure you that, back in 1962, it was
quite shocking, even taboo, so this film only hints at it, never
speaking its name. I'm talking about necrophilia, sexual relations
with the dead. Or, to be more blunt, fucking a corpse.
London: 1885 - Professor Bernard
Hichcock (Robert Flemyng; THE
MEDUSA TOUCH - 1978) is
a well-respected surgeon at a clinic, thanks to a new anesthetic he
invented which drastically lowers the heart rate and slows down the
decomposition of human organs, allowing him to work longer on
patients on the operating table without them waking up too soon and
dying from pain or shock (Which actually happened back then, due to
the unreliability of chloroform, the only anesthesia in use back in
the late-19th Century. Every patient reacted differently to it, many
waking up mid-surgery and dying, because no patient should wake up
seeing a surgeon with his hands wrist-deep in their bodies!). But
Professor Hichcock has another use for his anesthetic, one more sick
and twisted than anyone in society could accept. Since he can only
get sexually aroused with cadavers, his wife, Margaretha (Maria
Teresa Vianello, as "Teresa Fitzgerald"; THE
GIANTS OF THESSALY - 1960), being a proper married British
woman, allows her husband to inject her with the anesthetic, whereby
her body goes into a death-like state while Bernard goes to town on
her. They even have their own special room in Bernard's rather large
Victorian mansion to do the deed. It's a secret only he, Margaretha
and housekeeper Martha (Harriet White Medin; BLOOD
AND BLACK LACE - 1964) know about. On one such night,
Bernard gets greedy, wanting more time with his wife's lifeless body,
so he doubles the dose of the anesthesia, which results in Margaretha
dying instantly in front of him. After her funeral, where
Margaretha's coffin is placed in the unkempt family crypt (we see a
broken casket where a human skull is sticking out!), Bernard becomes
inconsolable and can no longer live in his mansion due to the
memories it holds, so he quits the clinic and moves out of London,
leaving the mansion in the care of Martha. Before he leaves, he asks
Martha if she has seen Margaretha's black cat Jezebel, but Martha
says she hasn't seen it since his wife's unfortunate death. What they
don't know is Jezebel is sitting guard over Margaretha's coffin in
the family crypt, sitting on top of the coffin, waiting for her to
return. Perhaps the cat knows something we don't?
Twelve years pass and Bernard returns to London and his mansion with
a new wife, Cynthia (Barbara Steele; THE
LONG HAIR OF DEATH - 1964). As soon as Cynthia steps
into the mansion, she is at unease. It could be all the portraits of
Margaretha that hang on many of the walls or the ear-piercing woman's
scream that she hears. Martha then enters the room with Jezebel in
her arms and tells Bernard and Cynthia that the screams they just
heard came from her sister. She is quite mad and she is committing
her to an asylum tomorrow morning. We can see that Bernard and
Cynthia haven't consummated their marriage yet (if you know what I
mean), as they are sleeping in separate bedrooms. It is also quite
obvious that Cynthia has no idea what her husband's sexual needs
involve, as she doesn't seem to be the type of woman that would be
willing to be put in a cadaver-like state so Bernard can get his jollies.
That night, during a raging thunderstorm, Cynthia looks out her
bedroom window and sees a woman in white walking towards the family
crypt. Is it possible that Margaretha is alive, a ghost or is it
something with a more rational explanation? The next morning Cynthia
tells her husband that she wants to move out of the house, but
Bernard tells her she is just nervous about living in a new house and
to give it time and she will get over it. Bernard is now back working
at the clinic as a surgeon and before he leaves, he tells Cynthia
that they have been invited to a concert tonight and to be ready by
8:00 p.m. At the end of the concert, Bernard is called to the clinic
for an emergency, so he has his assistant, Dr. Kurt Lowe (Silvano
Tranquilli, as "Montgomery Glenn; CASTLE
OF BLOOD - 1964) accompany Cynthia back to the mansion and
then immediately join him at the clinic. On the ride to the mansion,
Kurt and Cynthia get to know each other better and there is even a
little flirtation going on. At the clinic, the woman Bernard is
performing surgery on dies on the operating table and there are
murmurs from the staff that the "old man" is losing his
touch. Kurt tells Bernard that the patient would have probably lived
if he used the anesthesia he invented on her, but Bernard says no, he
will never use it again until it is perfected. As the dead female
patient is being wheeled away, Bernard looks at her and his eyes tell
us it's the kind of look a man gives when he is about to get lucky.
Will he be able to control his perverse desires? Don't count on it.
Bernard goes home, pours himself a couple of stiff drinks (The only
kind he enjoys!) and downs them quickly, not knowing that Cynthia is
passed out upstairs on the floor after discovering a human skull on
her pillow when she turned down the covers. When she wakes up, she
discovers that the skull is now missing. Before she can tells Bernard
what she saw, he is no longer in the mansion. He sneaked out to visit
the clinic at closing time. As he enters the morgue and is about to
get busy with the female cadaver, he is interrupted by the clinic's
janitor, who asks Bernard if he needs help in any way, Bernard beats
a hasty retreat out of the clinic and goes home (giving "blue
balls" a whole new meaning!). The next morning, Cynthia tells
Martha to keep her sister locked in her room because she heard
someone at her bedroom door last night, but Martha says it couldn't
have been her sister because she took her to the asylum the day
before. If it wasn't Martha's sister, then who was it? Cynthia tells
Bernard that she saw a woman walking down the hallway last night, but
she couldn't see her face because she was watching in fear through
her bedroom door's keyhole (She doesn't tell him about finding the
human skull in her bed, however.). What she is certain of is that the
woman was wearing exactly the same white slippers that Margaretha
wears in the painting that Bernard has in his bedroom. Bernard
reminds Cynthia that when he first met her, she wasn't well. The
shock of her father's sudden death left her in a highly nervous
condition. He tells her that she seems to be getting over it, but
warns her not to allow her imagination to get the best of her (It
seems more like a threat than a suggestion). Cynthia is adamant,
saying that she really saw it and that she waited up all night to
tell him, but he never came home. Bernard lies to her, saying he was
working late at the clinic and he got home extremely late. Cynthia
tells Bernard that she knows he adored Margaretha, but paintings of
her are in nearly every room, including his bedroom, and they make
her feel uncomfortable, as if Margaretha's eyes are watching her
every move. Bernard ignores her, telling Cynthia that he must leave,
but he reminds her that when he is not home, she is never to enter
his bedroom (There's also a door in the mansion that is always kept
locked, Martha telling Cynthia that even she doesn't have the key).
When Bernard leaves, Cynthia sees Martha exiting out a secret door
behind a full-length mirror in the hallway. Before she can see what
is behind that door, Kurt pays the mansion a visit to talk to
Bernard, but Cynthia tells him her husband is not at home. Kurt can
see something is troubling Cynthia and asks her what is wrong.
"Do you believe in ghosts?" asks Cynthia and when Kurt says
no, she says, "Neither do I, but ever since I have been in this
house, it's been a constant fear to me. I'm beginning to believe in
them." She tells Kurt about the woman in white that seems to be
following her, but Kurt asks if she is certain or did she image it?
"I knew you wouldn't believe me!" says Cynthia and then
asks Kurt if he thinks Bernard is normal? "As much a any man of
genius" says Kurt, wondering why she asked that question.
"Oh, nothing, just an idea" says Cynthia. Kurt says he must
go back to the clinic, but he tells Cynthia if she needs help with
anything, don't hesitate to let him know. By the look in both their
eyes, it is easy to see they are falling for each other, but will
they act upon it? After dinner, Bernard and Cynthia are sitting in
the Study ignoring each other when Bernard rises and says he must go
to the clinic, as he has important work to do. Cynthia complains and
tells Bernard he has changed and accuses him of not caring about her
anymore. She says it was a mistake for her to move into this mansion
and, once again, Bernard ignores her, asking Cynthia if she wants
Martha to sleep upstairs tonight. Cynthia says no, she would prefer
to be alone and tells Bernard to hurry back home; she'll stay awake
for him. Bernard says he will probably be very late, but he will look
in on hr to say goodnight (Stop, you're making me horny!" is
what no one would say in this situation, as Bernard makes it clear to
Cynthia that he doesn't consider her sexually attractive. Barbara
Steele? I'd give up screwing cadavers for her!). It's quite obvious
that Bernard would rather spend time with a corpse than be with her
and by the look on Cynthia's face, it tells us she now knows Bernard
is not a "normal" loving husband, but she doesn't know the
reason why. Martha overhears the conversation and realizes that
Bernard is having those sexual urges again.
Bernard enters the morgue and begins fondling the female cadaver (He
pulls the sheet of the naked corpse's body and while we don't see
anything, his eyes tell us how turned-on he is). Once again, he is
interrupted by one of the staff, this time by Dr. Lang (Spencer
Williams), who sees Bernard standing over a naked cadaver, but
Bernard is quick on his feet, telling Dr. Lang he was checking the
body's state of coagulation. Dr. Lang is confused and somewhat
suspicious, but Bernard makes a quick retreat from the morgue. This
bit of business will eventually lead to Professor Bernard Hichcock's
downfall, but he doesn't know it...yet.
Cynthia opens the secret mirror door and begins exploring. It leads
her to the mansion's dungeon, where she spots he human skull sitting
on a table. She also spots Martha taking care of an unseen woman in
white (she is sitting with her back to us) and Cynthia tells Bernard
Martha was lying. Her sister is being kept in a room in the basement.
Bernard asks if she actually saw the woman, which Cynthia finds to be
a strange question to ask. Cynthia then asks Bernard what's behind
the locked door she is not allowed to open and he tells her it's his
old laboratory and he wishes it to remain locked. She begs Bernard to
leave the house immediately because he has changed so much for the
worse since they have been here. Bernard tells her that he left this
house once and he bitterly regrets having done so and he shall not
leave it again, briskly telling Cynthia goodnight.
Bernard then hears the piano playing a tune that Margaretha use to
play when she was alive, so he races to the balcony and sees a woman
in white playing the piano. When he runs downstairs, all he sees is
Jezebel sitting on top of the piano. Bernard believes Margaretha has
returned from the dead, as the woman in white haunts his every waking
moment. He then finds Cynthia passed out next to the family crypt in
a raging thunderstorm. He brings her unconscious body to his old
"laboratory", which is actually the special room where he
and Margaretha use to play their perverse sexual games. When Cynthia
wakes up, she sees Bernard with a horribly deformed face (it's quite
a shocking sight, as his face pulsates with early-in-the-game bladder
effects) and she faints once again. At the clinic, Kurt notices some
scratches on Bernard's neck and he tells Kurt that Jezebel scratched
him. Kurt doesn't believe him because they look like fingernail
scratches, not cat scratches. Bernard then "confesses" to
Kurt that Cynthia scratched him, telling him his wife is not well and
she believes Margaretha is haunting her. Kurt is not buying it, but
he plays stupid. We then see Cynthia at the mansion under the control
of Bernard, who tells her he is going to make her "better"
and then hands her a glass of milk, telling her to drink it. Cynthia
pretends to drink it (she actually pours it into a potted plant) and
she brings the glass to Kurt at the clinic to examine and find out
what drug Bernard tried to slip her.
It is at this time we have to ask ourselves if Bernard sexually
assaulted Cynthia when he brought her to his dead wife's
"playroom." It would have been the perfect time to slip her
his anesthetic and then go to town on her body. At this time, it is
plain to see that Bernard has gone quite mad, He give Martha some
time off, telling her to leave the mansion and not to come back until
he calls for her. When Kurt discovers that the glass of milk
contained enough sleeping pills to kill Cynthia, he rushes to the
mansion, but will he arrive too late? Cynthia then wakes up in a
sealed coffin in the family crypt, but she is able to rock the coffin
off its base, breaking it and freeing her. She is then chase by the
woman in white, but is it really Margaretha? The answer may surprise
you (it did me!). The film concludes with the mansion burning to the
ground, but who, if anyone, will survive?
This Technicolor Italian Gothic horror film, directed by Riccardo
Freda (as "Robert Hampton"; THE
DEVIL'S COMMANDMENT - 1957; DOUBLE
FACE - 1969; MURDER
OBSESSION - 1981) and written by Ernesto Gastaldi (as
"Julyan Perry"; THE
WHIP AND THE BODY - 1963; HORROR
CASTLE - 1963; CRYPT
OF THE VAMPIRE - 1964; LIBIDO
- 1965), has much to recommend, thanks to the sly way necrophilia is
introduced into the plot (giving the first ten minutes, which takes
place at a graveyard with no dialogue, a whole new meaning, since it
makes no sense when you first see it. Rather than trying to explain
it, it is best if you see it for yourself.). While we see absolutely
no sexual defilements of human corpses, it's quite obvious that
Bernard is a necrophiliac, thanks to Robert Flemyng's not-so-subtle
looks at cadavers. It's by no means cartoonish, but it leaves no
doubts in your mind what he is really after. Since the subject matter
was considered off-limits, even in Italian genre
films (and that is saying quite a lot!), Freda and Gastaldi have to
come up with ways to imply it and Flemyng nails it (pardon the pun)
just by his facial twitches and eye movements alone (When Flemyng
discovered that his character was a necrophiliac, he tried to quit,
but Freda talked him out of it, assuring him it would be done
"tastefully."). The film was shot in 14 days, but it
doesn't look or feel like a rushed quickie, thanks to "Donald
Green's" (actually Raffaele Masciocchi; DEATH
ON THE FOURPOSTER - 1964) lush Technicolor cinematography
and Roman Vlad's (Freda's CALTIKI, THE
IMMORTAL MONSTER - 1959) evocative music score. Freda,
Steele, White Medin and Masciocchi would return in 1963 for THE
GHOST, a semi-sequel to this film, which is also known as THE
SPECTRE OF DR. HICHCOCK, minus the necrophilia angle. Both
Steele and White Medin play different characters and Elio Jotta (as
"Leonard G. Elliot"; MACISTE
IN KING SOLOMON'S MINES - 1964) portrays "Dr. John
Hichcock", a relative of Bernard's. Both films were made during
the '60s "pseudonym craze", in which audiences were made to
think that they were watching homegrown English language product, but
you would have to be braindead or severely retarded to believe that,
especially some of the names given to actors and behind-the-scenes
personnel. Some of the pseudonyms were brilliant, but some of them
were unfortunate, such as this film's Set Designer, Franco Fumagalli (PLOT
OF FEAR - 1976), who took or was given the nom de plume of
"Frank Smokecocks", a name that would have given him a
lifetime of bullying if it were real (even though it's a literal
English translation of his name!). I've always considered Riccardo
Freda a hit-or-miss director (THE
IGUANA WITH THE TONGUE OF FIRE [1971] and TRAGIC
CEREMONY [1972] were a couple of his misses) and this could
be his best film, at least in my opinion.
Filmed as L'ORRIBILE
SEGRETO DEL DR. HICHCOCK ("The Horrible Secret Of Dr.
Hichcock") and also known as RAPTUS:
THE SECRET OF DR. HICHCOCK and THE
TERROR OF DR. HICHCOCK, this film obtained a severely edited theatrical
release in the United States in 1964 by Sigma III Corp. (under
the review title) It is this same 77-minute edited print that made
its way onto U.S. VHS
from Republic
Pictures Home Video in 1986. Olive
Films then released it on DVD
& Blu-Ray
in 2016, but it was still the American 77-minute edit, which removes
nearly all the references to necrophilia (even though they are merely
implied!), so I wouldn't suggest purchasing it. The fully unedited
86-minute version can be found streaming on Amazon
Prime (the print bears the RAPTUS title) in an amazingly
crisp and colorful widescreen print. Also featuring Neil Robinson
(Freda's MACISTE IN HELL
- 1962), Al Christianson, Evar Simpson and Nat Harley. Not Rated,
but not for the kiddies (although I doubt they would understand the
subtext). This is adult material.
THE
HOUSE THAT SCREAMED (1969) -
In 19th Century France, eighteen-year-old Teresa (Cristina Galbo; WHAT
HAVE YOU DONE TO SOLANGE? - 1972) is brought to a boarding
school for troubled teenage girls between the ages of 15 and 21. This
boarding school is an alternative to juvenile detention, but Teresa
is about to learn that juvenile detention may be preferable, as this
boarding school's principal, Madame Fourneau (Lilli Palmer; WHAT
THE PEEPER SAW - 1972), runs this place worse than any
prison warden, where "insolent" girls are mercilessly
whipped after having their clothes ripped off their
backs, among other atrocities. Also living at the boarding school is
Madame Fourneau's young teenage son, Luis (John Moulder-Brown; VAMPIRE
CIRCUS - 1972), whom she keeps secluded away from the girls,
even though he occasionally escapes to peep on them. Madame Fourneau
doesn't believe these girls are good enough for her son, telling Luis
that the girls came to the school already "marked" and that
one day he will find a girl just like his mother, telling Luis,
"You need a woman like me!" (a creepy incestuous proposition).
It doesn't help that the school also harbors a killer, who murders
some of the worst students. Is Madame Fourneau covering up the
murders by telling the other students that they ran away from school
or is it possible that she doesn't know the truth (their bodies are
never found)? Not that there aren't enough red herrings on hand to
feed a family of five at dinner. Besides Luis (who we see playing
gently with an ant on an open book and then slamming it shut,
squishing the ant and showing us his dual personality), there's
Brechard (Victor Israel; THE
HOUSE OF INSANE WOMEN - 1971), the school's groundskeeper,
who likes to stare at the girls through windows. There is also the
mysterious Enrique (Clovis Dave), who visits the school every
Wednesday to drop off wood for the furnace and to screw one of the
lucky girls, who take turns with him every week! There is also Irene
(Mary Maude; CRUCIBLE OF TERROR
- 1971), who is Madame Fourneau's underling (and student), who is
more than happy to do all her nasty, violent punishments (she gets
off sexually by whipping the girls, as you will see on her face). The
truth is it could be anyone, since most of the students come from
troubled, even violent, backgrounds (Teresa's mother, who has never
been married, is a dancer at a cabaret, both things, being a single
mother and a cabaret dancer, are looked down upon during this time in history).
When Luis' secret girlfriend, student Isabelle (Maribel Martin; THE
BLOOD SPATTERED BRIDE - 1972), is viciously stabbed in the
greenhouse while arriving for a secret rendezvous with Luis, Madame
Fourneau tells the other students that she flew the coop and orders
that all the locks on the doors of the school be changed, with only
her, Irene and second-in-command, Madame Desprez (Candida Losada; SUPERNATURAL
- 1981), to have copies of the keys. We also discover that Madame
Fourneau is so sexually oppressed, she will not let the students take
showers in the nude, watching them shower in their nightdresses! When
one student decides to strip off her clothes and showers in the nude,
we can see on Madame Fourneau's face that she is taken aback, but is
getting a sexual thrill from it. Luis, who uses the school's heating
ducts to spy on the girls, spots Teresa and it is love at first peep
and Teresa reciprocates, getting Irene in a ire and threatening to
tell Madame Fourneau unless she does her bidding. Teresa is brought
to the school's basement, where Irene's secret torture room is
located. Irene lets Teresa know that Madame Fourneau lets her read
everyone's file and she knows that Teresa's mother is a cabaret
dancer ("Only prostitutes work in cabarets. Is your mother a
prostitute?") and if she doesn't want all the other students to
know the truth, she will sing for her and the two other students in
the room, cohorts Ingrid (Maria Gustafsson: THE
FOURTH VICTIM - 1971) and Andrea (Teresa Hurtado), who all
belittle and degrade her relentlessly until Teresa cries (It is easy
to see that Irene really enjoys doing this and tells Teresa they will
do it again at the same place and time tomorrow). That night, Teresa
sneaks into Luis' room and tells him she is leaving. Luis doesn't
want her to leave, but when he realizes she is serious, he breaks
open his piggy bank and gives her all the money he has, telling her
the only way to escape the school is to climb the iron gate to the
entrance of the school because his mother ordered Brechard to cut
down all the "creepers" on the stone walls that surround
the school so no one could climb them to escape. All this is for
naught, for as Teresa tries to escape that night, someone sneaks up
behind her and cuts her throat. When Teresa comes up missing the next
morning, Madame Fourneau tells everyone that she's another escapee,
but Irene says that cannot be, she saw Teresa escape from her bedroom
window and she stood guard by the iron gate last night in the pouring
rain to make sure she didn't escape. Madame Fourneau tells Irene to
shut up, but when Irene threatens to tell people about her cruelty
and lawless tactics, Madame Fourneau takes away all of Irene's
powers, taking her keys and telling Irene she's just another student
now. Irene tries to escape the school in the middle of the night, but
she finds all the doors locked and hears Madame Fourneau approaching,
so she runs to the attic, where the film concludes, exposing the
killer's identity. Expect a truly twisted finale, one you will never
see coming, as we learn the real reason why the killer was murdering
young girls (the reason is exposed in this review).
I decided to view this film again after learning of the death of
director/screenwriter Narciso Ibáñez Serrador on June
07, 2019 at the age of 83 (Serrador is credited as screenwriter on
this film as "Luis Verña Peñafiel"). I had
forgotten how good this film was, on par with his WHO
CAN KILL A CHILD? (1975). Serrador worked mainly in Spanish
television (read my obituary),
where he was considered a major influence of many of Spain's future
directors. He may have only made two theatrical films), but both of
them were very memorable. (His third theatrical film, MASTER
OF HORROR [1965], was actually an edited version of episodes
of a late-'50s/early-'60s Spanish TV series titled "Obras
Maestras Del Terror" ["Masterpieces Of
Terror"], which starred Serrador's father, Narciso
Ibáñez Menta [NIGHT
OF THE WEREWOLF - 1980], a famous Spanish actor who was
fondly known as Spain's Lon Chaney, due to him changing his
appearance in nearly every film he was in, thanks to his trusty
makeup kit, which he always had with him). This one is a whipsmart
story (pun intended) of sexual oppression/repression and the violence
it causes, but
I was taken aback by the film's total lack of nudity and graphic
violence. There is plenty of female flesh on view, but I doubt anyone
would call it nudity in the purest sense. There is also some violence
on view, but, just like the nudity, director Serrador makes you
believe you saw more than there really was (Tobe Hooper would copy
this technique for THE
TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE - 1974). This is a masterwork of both
style and substance that fans of giallo and Gothic horror are bound
to enjoy, where scares lurk in every shadow, people say the most
hurtful things (both deliberately and unintentionally) and it is hard
to trust anyone. What we have here is a great mystery interspersed
among the Gothic horror, with a finale that will knock your socks
off. SPOILER ALERT!!! Do not read if you
haven't seen the film! The ending of this film was copied
nearly verbatim by the Spanish horror film PIECES
(1982), only director Juan Piquer Simon throws in a ton of nudity and
graphic violence, where nothing is left to the imagination. END
OF SPOILER!!!
Shot as LA RESIDENCIA
("The Residence"), this film received a slightly edited theatrical
release in the United States by American International Pictures
(A.I.P.) in 1971, which was rated GP (the late'60s/early-'70s version
of a PG Rating), yet I couldn't find a legitimate VHS release for the
film in the States. The first time this film appeared on disc was as
a double feature DVD
by Shout! Factory's
discontinued Elvira's Movie Macabre sub-label, with the film MANEATER
OF HYDRA (1966). Both films were fullscreen TV versions and
it compromises the atmospheric cinematography by Manuel Berenguer (THE
NIGHT OF THE DEVILS - 1972). Truth be told, the first time I
saw this film was on TV
in the mid-'70s and hardly anything had to be edited out (besides the
student showing her naked back in the shower), but it was still in
fullscreen. The first time a fully legitimate uncut widescreen print
would turn up on disc was in late-2016, when Scream
Factory released it on Blu-Ray
(Plenty of online gray market sites offered it on DVD-R
and some still do). Even though the disc is lacking in extras (just
very short interviews with John Moulder-Brown and Mary Maude, as well
as a theatrical trailer), it does offer the U.S. theatrical version
(running 94 minutes) in high definition (HD), as well as the
104-minute Extended version (in HD with SD inserts), making this
Blu-Ray the preferred way of viewing the film. It's also available
streaming on YouTube from user "Horror Movie Channel", but
it is a very grainy ultra-widescreen print. Also featuring Tomas
Blanco (THE FEAST OF SATAN
- 1971), Juana Azorin (VIOLENT
BLOOD BATH - 1973) and Frank Brana (PIECES
- 1982; there's that connection again!). The Blu-Ray is Not Rated,
but there's really nothing in the film that crosses into R-Rated territory.
HOWL
OF THE DEVIL (1988) - This
is probably the least seen, and talked about, horror film in director/co-screenwriter/star
Paul Naschy's career. According to Naschy's son, Sergio Molina, who
appears in this film in a fairly large role (and he's very good),
this was a very troubled production that put his father on the verge
of a heart attack several times, due to financial issues (it took
over a year to make thanks to budgetary problems) and his father
appearing in nearly every scene, as well as being the director. This
film is not only chock-full of female nudity and extreme gore, it is
also Naschy's most personal film, as he appears
in full makeup as several horror icons from the 1920s, '30s
& '40s, which is the sole reason Naschy became an actor in the
first place. Naschy also portrays two brothers, one dead and the
other jealous of his career, his jealousy leading him to do
horrendous things to the people around him.
The film opens with a prostitute trying to thumb a ride and not
being successful at it, so she steps in front of the next car, the
driver stopping and telling her to get in. She offers to perform oral
sex on the driver, Eric (Howard Vernon; FACELESS
- 1987), but he refuses, telling her he has a boss that will
pay her handsomely for her services. She agrees to it, so Eric drives
her to his boss' mansion. It is the home of failed (but rich) actor
Hector Doriani (Paul Naschy; CURSE
OF THE DEVIL - 1973), whose brother, Alex Doriani (Naschy
again; HUNCHBACK OF
THE MORGUE - 1973) was a world famous horror film star until
he committed suicide by putting a pistol to his head and pulling the
trigger, leaving behind a wife, Lorena (Isabel Prinz; SLUGS:
THE MOVIE - 1987), and a young son, Adrian (Sergio Molina,
using the pseudonym "Serg Mills"; the Naschy-directed THE
BEAST AND THE MAGIC SWORD - 1983). When Lorena was found
dead of a drug overdose a couple of years later, Hector was awarded
guardianship of nephew Adrian, along with his brother's vast fortune.
Hector abuses Adrian both mentally and physically and punishes him
often, because when he looks at him, he's reminded of his successful
brother. He won't allow Adrian to watch any of his father's horror
films, saying to him that they are "trash" (When he catches
Adrian watching one of his father's horror films, Hector puts his
beefy hand over Adrian's face and pushes him to the ground). He also
won't allow Adrian to have any friends, which troubles manservant
Eric and housekeeper/cook Carmen (Caroline Munro; DEMONS
6: DE PROFUNDIS - 1989), who both tell Hector a boy his age
needs friends to play with. Adrian has found a solution to that
problem; for when he is alone, which is often, he imagines his father
visiting him as one of the characters of his horror films, be it The
Frankenstein Monster,
Doctor Jekyll, Quasimodo
The Hunchback, The
Phantom Of The Opera and even Werewolf
Waldemar Daninsky, every one of them promising Adrian that they
will return one day soon to spend their life with him.
Now let's get back to the prostitute. After spending a long
time waiting for Hector to appear, she is about to leave when Eric
appears and escorts her to a room, telling her that when she enters
it, "time has no meaning" there, it is like "time
stands still." She enters the room and is greeted by Hector,
whom is dressed and made-up like Nostradamus
(she has no idea who that is!). It's obvious that Hector is not only
jealous of his brother's horror film characters, he is also into very
rough sex and has a low opinion of women. After he is done with her,
Hector tells Eric to give the "bitch" $400 and kick her out
of the house. Eric offers to drive her to wherever she needs to go
since it is 4:00 AM and the mansion is a long distance from the city,
but Hector says no, all women are sluts and don't deserve any type of
kindness, ordering Eric to kick her out and be quick about it. We
then see the prostitute walking in the forest, lost, when someone
dressed as a giallo villain (fedora, black gloves and a long
overcoat) slices her stomach open with a knife, killing her. This
unknown killer will strike often in this film and there are many
suspects, or should I say, red herrings. There is Eric, who despises
Hector, but he stays for Adrian, whom he loves (and vice versa). Eric
is also into the Black Arts, as we see him summoning the spirit of
Alex, who promises he will return, but it is too early for him to do
so (he tells Eric to stop summoning him because it is very painful).
There's also priest Father Damian (Fernando Hilbeck; DEMON
WITCH CHILD - 1974), who once had an illicit love affair
with Carmen and threatens to kill her if she doesn't return to him
(his hatred for women matches Hector's). Also a suspect is Zacarias
(Cris Huerta; RAGE
- 1984), a drunken bum Father Damian has hired to spy on Carmen, to
make sure she's not having sex with Hector or has any lovers visiting
her at the mansion. And, of course, there is Hector, who hates all
women except for the dead Lorena, whom he adores, having a photo of
her on a table that he orders Eric not to touch. Yet Hector keeps
hitting on Carmen, telling her that one day he will bed her and she
will be his. Carmen wants nothing to do with Hector, telling him the
only reason she stays is because of Adrian, whom she cares for just
as much (if not more) than Eric (and, just like Eric, Adrian loves
her, too).
As more women come to the mansion and have sex with Hector (who
dresses and is made-up like Richard III and FuManChu!),
they, too, are murdered by the unknown killer after Hector is done
with them. One is disemboweled, her innards falling on the forest
grounds. Another has her throat cut from ear-to-ear and still another
has a knife thrust
into the back of her head until the blade exits out of her mouth.
We even see the killer use a giant pair of tongs to rip off one of
his female victim's nipples (with nothing left to the imagination).
The mansion is also invaded by a male/female team of wanted
criminals and they threaten to kill everyone, including Adrian, but
when the police knock on the front door and tell Hector that they
will return in an hour to check-up on him, the criminals get spooked
and leave, only to get bloodily dispatched by the gloved killer. As
things get bloodier and bloodier, Eric is able to conjure-up Alex
from the other side, this time for good, but Eric has upsetted Satan
(also portrayed by Naschy) and Alex is nothing but a decaying
corpse (Alex says to Eric: "Your summoning forced me into a
condemned body. Unfortunately, I was murdered in the state of sin.
Therefore, I'm condemned forever. You weren't thinking. You have
unleashed Hell. You have brought Satan!" Try to figure that one
out!). Alex then rips out Eric's eyes for pissing off the Devil. We
then discover that it was Adrian who was killing everyone, as
flashbacks show us that Lorena and Hector were lovers, not knowing
that Adrian watched as Lorena put a pistol to Alex's head while he
was passed-out drunk on his bed, pulling the trigger and making it
look like Alex committed suicide, while Hector watches, smiling and
laughing. Adrian then much later murdered his mother (proving that
revenge is, indeed, a dish best served cold), making it look like an
accidental drug overdose. He killed all the women because he watched
Hector make love to them (spying on them though a hole in the eye of
one of the portraits hanging in Hector's makeout room) and imagined
them as his mother making love to Hector. Now it is Hector's turn to
die... painfully. Adrian now has his father back, not caring that he
is a rotting corpse. He longed for this day, his father telling him
that one day his reign will end and Adrian will rule...as the
Anti-Christ! WTF?!?
Some people may call this film misogynistic and they wouldn't be
wrong...to a degree. While most of the women here can be
considered "loose", there is a strong female presence in
Carmen, who continually refutes male chauvinist Hector's sexual
advances, even when he offers her expensive jewels to go to bed with
him. Yes, she did have a brief affair with Father Damian (Who meets a
fitting demise. When he sneaks into the mansion, he is met by Alex's
decaying corpse, who lifts the sinful priest up in the air by the
neck with one hand, crushing his throat) but she knew what she did
was wrong, as Father Damian was a woman-hating bastards who still
preached to his mostly female flock every Sunday, so she broke it
off. Zacarias (who gets an axe planted in his back) verbally and
physically abuses Carmen, blaming his alcoholism on a woman who
wronged him in the past and taking it out on Carmen, making nearly
every male character in this film a misogynist. Carmen knows it, but
still pays for it in the end when she agrees to go to bed with Hector
after nearly being raped by Father Damian (She only does it because
she knows Zacarias is watching and will tell the sin-filled priest,
pissing him off to no end). Both she and Hector are murdered by
Adrian when he impales them with a
metal spear while Hector is on top of Carmen, screwing her (He
imagines Carmen is his mother). Still, this is an interesting horror
film with a lot of symbolism if you know where to look (especially in
the room where Eric performs his black magic rites). Late in the
film, we learn some unsavory things Eric has done in his past (such
as having underage sex with male children) that makes his gory death
fitting (When he stumbles outside, eyeless, during a thunderstorm, he
is hit by a bolt of lightning and explodes!), even though we cared
for him until the revelation about his past. Paul Naschy does a solid
job with his direction (other films he directed include INQUISITION
- 1976; NIGHT OF
THE WEREWOLF - 1980 and PANIC
BEATS - 1983) and the screenplay, which he co-authored with
an uncredited Salvador Sáinz (a bit actor in Naschy's
previously mentioned PANIC BEATS
and THE BEAST AND THE
MAGIC SWORD), hits all the right notes, even if the story is
unsavory. Fans of full-frontal female nudity and graphic violence are
sure to have a ball with this film and no one can do unsufferable,
unfeeling men better than Naschy. Even though this was made in the
late-'80s, it has the look and feel of a '70s Spanish horror film,
thanks to Naschy's knowledge of the time period. And that's why it
comes recommended from yours truly. I love '70s horror films made in
Spain and, even though this isn't one of them, it sure has all the
ingredients that makes them so entertaining.
Shot as EL
AULLIDO DEL DIABLO (a literal translation of the review
title), this film received very little distribution around the world
due to its troubled production history, making its premiere on
Spanish television in 1989. No theatrical or home video release in
any format in the United States or in most of the rest of the world,
this film is screaming for an official Blu-Ray release with all
the bells and whistles. I know it will be a big seller because there
are many Paul Naschy fans out there. I caught it streaming on
YouTube, on channel "deedeekingisdead", in a very fuzzy
fullscreen print (it was impossible to read the opening red credits),
which shouldn't be too much of a surprise since it was a dupe of a
VHS tape from the defunct Video Search Of Miami (VSOM), a gray market
company who were known for their lousy-looking prints, but they had
some amazingly obscure films (especially back then) in their library,
many of them that they subtitled in English (like this film) for the
very first time. I admit that I used them a few times, even if they
made you join their "club" (costing you more money) before
you could order their expensive tapes. This film is still watchable,
but I would pay handsomely for a remastered print, as would many
other people. Are you listening Code Red, Blue Underground or Shout
Factory? Also featuring Joseph Garco, Roberta Kuhn, Carmen Plate and
Mariano Vidal Molina (A
DRAGONFLY FOR EACH CORPSE - 1975). Not Rated for all
the right reasons.
INFERNO
(1980) - Since I have been reviewing basically nothing but
Italian genre films for the past year, I decided it was time to turn
my attention to the master that jump-started the giallo genre in the
early-'70s, namely Dario Argento. Yes, there were many giallo flicks
being made in Italy and abroad before Argento came onto the scene,
but Argento's first two directorial efforts, THE
BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE (1970) and THE
CAT O' NINE TAILS (1971), were not just unqualified
successes in Italy, they were extremely popular across the world, so
there were a glut of giallo films being produced after that (the majority
of them reviewed on this site), most of them with a number or a
species of animal or insect in the title, hoping to catch a ride on
Argento's comet-like tail. A lot of excellent giallo films followed,
as well as many below-average or average ones, but they would have
never been made at all without Argento's input in this genre. While
this film isn't a giallo, it is Argento's middle film in his
"Three Mothers" trilogy, starting with SUSPIRIA
(1977; Mater Suspiriorum - "The Mother of Sighs") and
ending with MOTHER OF TEARS
(2007; Mater Lachrymarum). This film pertains to Mater Tenebrarum,
the "Mother of Darkness", and she's the most malevolent
Mother of them all, yet, for some reason, this film doesn't get the
recognition it so richly deserves and it could be because of the
stiff and lackluster performance of the main male actor, Leigh
McCloskey (THE BERMUDA DEPTHS
- 1978), who used his "talents" to become a soap opera star
in the States. But I had no problem overlooking his performance and
just went along for the ride. There is also something else you should
know about the film before watching it. Argento became severely ill
with a bout of hepatitis during filming and was bedridden. According
to various sources, Mario Bava (A
BAY OF BLOOD - 1971), who was the visual effects creator/second
unit director/camera operator on this film, filled in as director
when Argento was too ill to direct and he ended up directing much of
what you see in the film (following Argento's meticulous notes).
Mario Bava passed away a few weeks after this film premiered
theatrically in Italy, so this is Bava's true last film behind the
camera. With all of the trivia out of the way, lets get to the film itself.
We see Rose Elliot (Irene Miracle; THE
NIGHT TRAIN MURDERS - 1974) reading a book about the Three
Mothers, while an offscreen narrator reads this chapter: "Each
of the Three Mothers live in their own separate dwellings. One in
Rome, one in New York and one in Freiberg, Germany. The Three Mothers
rule the world, with sorrow, tears and darkness. Mater Suspiriorum,
the Mother of Sighs, and the oldest of the three, lives in Freiburg.
Mater Lachrymarum, the Mother of Tears and the most beautiful of the
sisters, holds rule in Rome. Mater Tenebrarum, the Mother of
Darkness, who is the youngest and cruelest of the three, controls New
York. Each dwelling contains the repository of all their filthy
secrets. Those so-called mothers are actually wicked stepmothers,
incapable of creating life. The land on which the three houses have
been constructed will eventually become deathly and plague-ridden, so
much so that the area around will reek horribly. And that is the
first key to the Mothers' secret. Truly, the primary key. The second
key to the poisonous secret of the Three Sisters is hidden in the
cellar under their houses. There you can find both the picture and
the name of the Sister living in that home. This is the location of
the second key. The third key can be found under the soles of your
shoes. There is the third key." Rose then writes a
letter to her brother Mark (Leigh McCloskey; CAMERON'S
CLOSET - 1987), who is studying music in Rome, but we are
not privy as to what is in the letter...yet.
Rose is living in a foreboding building in New York and walks
outside to put the letter in a mailbox, She then talks to Mr.
Kazanian (Sacha Pitoeff; PATRICK
STILL LIVES - 1980), a bookstore owner in the building next
door who sold her the book on the Three Mothers. She tells him that
there's an awful smell emanating in the area and he tells her to give
it time, she will get use to it. He also tells her that the only true
mystery is that "our lives are governed by dead people."
What could he possibly mean by that? We then discover that Rose is
looking for the second key, so she goes down to her building's cellar
(after a black cat crosses her path, uh oh!) and amongst the cobwebs
she discovers a leaky pipe that must have been leaking for quite some
time because the water has carved a path into the concrete floor. She
follows the flowing water and comes to a small pool. He necklace
falls into the pool and she discovers that the pool is rather deep,
so deep that Rose has to swim underwater to search for her heirloom.
She sees her necklace at the bottom but has to come up for some air.
She then swims to the bottom, picks up her necklace and is assaulted
by a rotting corpse. She tries to surface, but can't seem to find the
opening. Just when it looks like Rose is about to drown, she finds
the opening and runs out of the cellar, not noticing that she has
dropped her lighter. We then see a black-gloved hand picking up the
lighter and then the ceiling collapses in the cellar.
We then switch to Rome, where Mark is at a class on classical music
in a huge auditorium at a university. Mark is reading his sister's
letter, which begins with, "My dear brother Mark. As you know,
here in New York, I've been living in a rather old building for quite
some time..." As Mark is reading the letter, he sees a beautiful
young woman holding a white Persian cat talking to him, but no words
are coming out of her mouth. Mark puts the letter back in the
envelope, not reading the rest, and follows the woman out of the
auditorium, forgetting the letter on his desk. Fellow student Sara
(Eleonora Giorgi; BLACK
BELLY OF THE TARANTULA - 1971) picks up the letter and reads
it. It affects her in ways she cannot understand and asks a cab
driver to take her to a very old library, which she has never been to
before. As soon as she steps out of the taxi, she smells a very
strange odor (uh oh!) and goes inside, asking an elderly bookbinder
(Luigi Lodoli; RUSH
- 1983) where she can find the book on the Three Mothers. Sara finds
a diary written in Latin and from that moment on, her life will never
be the same, if she has any life left at all. When she tries to leave
the library, she gets the feeling she is being followed and gets
lost, entering a room that looks like an alchemist's laboratory. A
man grabs the diary out of Sara's hands and she runs for her life,
taking a taxi home and meeting friend Carlo (Gabriele Lavia;
Argento's SLEEPLESS - 2001)
in the elevator. Sara tells him she's scared and doesn't want to be
alone tonight, so Carlo accompanies Sara to her apartment. She then
calls Mark and tells him to come over, he has to read his sister's
letter immediately. The lights suddenly go out in Sara's apartment
and Carlo checks the fusebox. When Carlo re-enters the room, he has a
huge knife sticking in his neck, the blade protruding out the other
side. The black-gloved killer pulls the knife out of Carlo's neck and
stabs Sara in the back, killing her. Mark then arrives at the
apartment and discovers Sara's dead body. When the police arrive at
the apartment, Mark notices the beautiful catwoman in the back of a
taxicab, riding away from the scene of the crime and smiling at Mark.
He then phones Rose and she tells him to come to New York
immediately, then the phone goes dead.
We then watch as Rose is being stalked by the black-gloved killer.
For some reason I don't understand (Maybe to find her lighter?), Rose
goes back down to the cellar and notices a broken window that is
letting the pouring rain flood the floor. Suddenly, a pair of
grizzled, monstrous hands grab Rose's head, putting her head under a
sheet of glass (a Argento trademark), slamming the edge of the sheet
of glass repeatedly across her throat, nearly decapitating her, her
blood spurting on the walls. Mark arrives in New York and goes to
Rose's apartment, meeting a nurse (Veronica Lazar: Argento's THE
STENDHAL SYNDROME - 1996) and the elderly wheelchair-bound
Professor Arnold (Feodor Chaliapin; THE
CHURCH - 1989) in the elevator. Rose is nowhere to be found,
but Mark finds the word "MATER" carved into the top of her
desk. Mark then meets Rose's friend and neighbor, Elise (Daria
Nicolodi; Bava's SHOCK
- 1977), who shows Mark a small hole in the wall, telling him every
apartment has one and they are connected to a series of pipes. The
pipe in Rose's wall leads to Elise's apartment and they used it to
talk to each other late at night (This is important information, so
pay attention!). It seems that Elise is rather wealthy and she has a
butler named John (Leopoldo Mastelloni; TO
BE TWENTY - 1978) who dotes on her. Elise notices that she
has blood on the sole of her foot and could have only come from
Rose's apartment. Mark and Elise discover a trail of blood (which
neither of them first noticed because the carpet in the apartment is
blood red in color) leads to a service entrance, which Elise says is
never used. Mark follows the trail of blood alone (Elise is too
scared) down a metal spiral staircase and then passes out. Elise
finds a bloody handprint hidden in a curtain and runs to go tell
Mark, but she sees someone or something dragging Mark's body away.
Elise is then attacked by a pack of cats (look closely and you can
see the hands of a crew member throwing a cat at her!) and the killer
stabs her to death with a knife. We then find out that Mark may have
a heart condition and any sudden jolt could render him unconscious or
kill him (Mark denies having a heart condition, but is he telling the truth?).
Mark talks to Mr. Kazanian, whom he spots complaining to the
building's caretaker, Carol (Alida Valli; KILLER
NUN - 1978), about the proliferation of cats in his
bookstore, which he blames on her building. Mr. Kazanian tells Mark
nothing about his sister, but tells him there will be a rare lunar
eclipse tonight. We then see Kazanian killing a cat in his bookstore
(brutal) and then stuffing a bunch of cats in a burlap sack, which he
drowns in a nearby lake. Unfortunately for the crippled Kazanian, who
walks with the aide of crutches, he falls into the lake and is
devoured by rats! A butcher hears Kazanian's cries for help and runs
to him (watch closely as he walks, or rather runs, on water!), but
instead of helping, he cuts off Kazanian's head with a large knife!
What in the hell is going on here???
John, who is working in conjunction with Carol and the nurse, who
turns out to be Mater Tenebrarum, has his eyes ripped out of their
sockets (a great shock cut) by the Mater. Carol then bursts into
flames and falls out her apartment window, through a glass ceiling
below (Argento has a thing for breaking glass, as it is in most of
his films). Mark figures out where the third key is hidden when he
looks at a photo of the front of the building and figures out that
the decorative ornaments that adorn every floor are actually musical
notes, leading him to the location of the third key. Will Mark get to
the key in time to stop this madness or is all his effort for naught?
C'mon now, you didn't actually think I would tell you,
did you?
While this film fails to satisfy the logical mind, there is no
denying that it has an atmosphere of dread that just won't quit. I
actually like this film much more than SUSPIRIA
or MOTHER OF TEARS
because of its atmosphere and the well-crafted set-pieces, many of
them shocking and unexpected. What Mark finds when locating the third
key is so well done and surprising, you'll rewind it several times
just to take it all in (and this was done before CGI!). Argento
wanted to scrap this shot, but Mario Bava showed him that it could be
done realistically and cheaply. There is no doubt in my mind that
Argento is a master visual storyteller, because he can make even the
most disjointed of stories, such as the one in this film,
entertaining and ensuring that you not take your eyes off the screen.
I have always said that he gives David Lynch a run for his money,
maybe even surpassing him in sheer visual weirdness alone. The only
negative point is Leigh McCloskey's unemotional acting. His facial
expression never changes, whether terrified or running out of a
burning building. He would probably wear the same expression if he
were squeezing a hard turd out his asshole, but he really does
nothing to hurt this film because it is 90% atmosphere, 10% plot. The
music score, by the late Keith Emerson (Lucio Fulci's MURDER-ROCK:
DANCING DEATH - 1984) is appropriately haunting and
effective. They don't get much better than this, folks.
This film had an uneventful theatrical release in the United States
because Twentieth Century-Fox really had no idea on how to promote
this film properly, so it came and went fairly fast, even though the
film was not edited (a first for an Argento film). It then showed up
on fullscreen VHS from Key Video (owned by Twentieth Century-Fox)
with an incorrect running time of 84 minutes listed on the sleeve,
even though it was the full 106-minute edit. In 2000, Anchor Bay
Entertainment (who else?) released an uncut print in its OAR on VHS
and DVD. A few years
later, Blue Underground (who else?) released it on DVD and Blu-Ray.
All the discs have a very interesting interview with Argento and
Lamberto Bava, who was this film's first assistant director, working
alongside his father. Argento tells us that all the shots of the
killer's hands are his (as they are in all of his films) and Bava
tells us that this film made him hate cats because he had to wrangle
them here and he grew to hate the smell of their fur. He still can't
stand them up to this day. Also starring Paolo Paoloni (CANNIBAL
HOLOCAUST - 1980), Fulvio Mingozzi (EYEBALL
- 1975), Rudolfo Lodi (SABATA -
1969) and Ania Pieroni (HOUSE
BY THE CEMETERY - 1981). Rated R.
KILLING
AMERICAN STYLE (1988) - For
those of you (like myself) who like their action films that seem to
come from some alternate universe, where everyone knows martial arts,
the cops are about as helpful as a tick on a deer, guns never seem to
run out of bullets and the bad guys somehow multiply out of thin air,
then there is no one better at that than director/screenwriter Amir
Shervan. He previously gave us the WTF?!? action film HOLLYWOOD
COP (1986) and would just a mere year later after this film
deliver his cinematic masterpiece called SAMURAI
COP. Shervan (who passed away in 2006) was independently
wealthy and made films his own way (and it shows), but there seems to
be no gray area when it comes to his films. Either you love 'em or
hate 'em. Me? I love them with all my heart just because we get to
see one man make films his way and not by committee and he had a
stable of actors who would follow him to the ends of the Earth. They
knew they weren't making anything classic, but since each film took
about 30 days to shoot, these people had good-paying jobs with a
person who treated them and their ideas like gold. Everyone I have
heard speak about Amir Shervan speaks about him as a man who just
wanted to make films (at one time, he owned about 70% of all theaters
in Iran, before he moved to the U.S.) and was willing to take chances
with unknown actors and give well-established actors parts in his
films, too. True, the well-established actors were at the low-ebb of
their careers, but at least he gave them jobs. And he simply loved
the late Robert Z'Dar, who appearred in every film he made (there are
still two more Shervan films out there still waiting
to be seen: The elusive GYPSY
[1991) and YOUNG REBELS
[1992], which should be available on DVD a short time after you read
this). Yes, I know, Shervan was Iranian, but his heart was pure
American cheese, and we should all be happy about that and put our
prejudices aside and just go along for the weird trip. The film
starts out with scumbag crook Lynch (John Lynch)
"interviewing" five young female dancers for one opening he
has in his club. The first two fail, but the third one hits his zone
(he must be a tit man because she has the biggest ones) and he takes
her to a dressing room for her "interview". Head bad guy
Tony Stone (the late Robert Z'Dar; it still hurts my heart to say
"late") comes walking into Lynch's club and he knocks on
the dressing room door, saying, "I have a big job. Zip it
up!" Lynch tells his new dancer to "keep it warm" for
him (which she does by pinching her nipples!), as Tony, his brother
Jessie (G. Alexander Virdon, Virden or Verdan, depending what film he
was in), Lynch and Loony (Co-Procucer and Production Designer Jimmy
Williams), who is a little slow in his head, rob what looks like a
graveyard for old ice cream trucks with the help of a guard working
for them on the inside. Turns out today is the day all the employees
get paid and Tony and his mob rob the joint of a bagful of money
(employees get paid with cash?) after killing three guards and
leaving the premises. The head of the business (Will someone please
tell me what kind of business it is?) notices that the crooked guard
is shooting into the air rather than at Tony and his gang, so Tony
and Lynch get pinched by the police thanks to testimony from the
guard. We then see them all on a bus being driven to a maximum
security prison, when the bus driver notices what is obvious to the
viewer to be a staged accident and stops the bus. Loony (dressed as a
woman) and Jessie (playing a man pinned under a pickup truck) then
begin to kill all the guards and free Tony and Lynch, but Jessie gets
shot and seriously hurt in the process. Tony decides that they will
use the first house they find as a place to patch-up Jessie and not
leave until he is ready to be moved. It is then that the movie turns
into a perverse take on THE
DESPERATE HOURS (the 1955 Bogey version, since the 1990
Mickey Rourke version wasn't even made yet), but with the usual
Shervan twist. Tony just happens to pick the house of musclehead John
Morgan (Harold Diamond, who made three films with Shervan), a horse
farmer by trade who has a beautiful wife and sister-in-law and a son
who just wants to be like his father, so Dad takes him to martial
arts school. While Tony and his gang kill horse trainer Jose (Jessus
Quebus) and threaten the sunbathing bikini-clad sisters by the pool.
John and his son are at martial arts class, where a boy pushes around
John's son, but John reminds him of his training. It's when the kid's
father starts pushing around John that they take the battle to the
ring and John beats the snot out of him. Remember, do what Daddy
says, not what he does. John's wife Doris (Veronica Paul) tells John
that she is a nurse (what are the chances?) and she will do her best
to patch up Jessie as long as they promise to leave as soon as
possible. John and his son arrive home to all this mess (John gets a
little beat-down from Tony and Lynch). When Doris decides she doesn't
have enough training to fix Jessie, she calls Dr. Fuji (regular
Shervan player Joselito C Rescobar; also an Executive Producer; he's
about as Japanese as I'm Korean!) to have John drive over to pick him
up so he can take care of Jessie's wounds and to make sure he doesn't
tell anyone where he is heading. Tony then calls his stepmother
(Sandy Palms; also Production Manager) to go to a motel to pick up
his bag of money (Wait a second, how did it get hidden there? That
room must have been rented out plenty of times after Tony was
convicted! My head hurts!) Stepmom makes some kind on boneheaded
remark that it may not be best to give him all the money at once
(Greedy little bitch!). John and Dr. Fuji are chased by the police,
but John manages to lose them in a really bad car chase (I would have
stopped for a second, explained my situation to the officers and had
the cops surround the place, but that's just me.). Meanwhile, Lt.
Sunset (a bored-looking Jim Brown, but you could never tell when
Brown was bored or excited) starts his own investigation and ends up
at a whorehouse that Tony's stepmother worked at, but is told she
hasn't been there for days (Lt. Sunset thanks a whore for putting her
tongue in his ear before he leaves!). John takes a chance and tries
to kill Tony, but Lynch knocks him out and later rapes Doris
doggie-style in their own bedroom while she is taking a bath and John
is unconscious on the bed (Wait a second. A bedroom with it's own
bathtub? Has anyone ever seen that? Anyone have a Tylenol?). John's
son manages to steal a gun from a sleeping Loony and he tries to give
it to his still groggy father (some hero he is!), so he gives it to
his mother, but Tony and the gang get the gun back when they threaten
to blow the boy's head off. (Loony goes off on Tony by asking,
"Why do you keep calling me Loony? You know my name is
Charles!" We then find out that Loony is Tony's Uncle and he
nicknamed him "Loony" because he's not all there in the
head.). Not trusting his stepmother, Tony sends John to pick up the
bag of money at the motel, which Lt. Sunset and his squad already
have staked out. They are keeping a close eye on Tony's stepmother
when John enters the scene and all the cops become so confused, they
make the Three Stooges look like MENSA members. John collects the
money (along with a handgun) and, after kicking a couple of cops in
the butt, manages to get away. Lt. Sunset (probably named that
because that is where his career is headed) and his Keystone Kops
look through the area for John, when Lt. Sunset finally hits on a
good idea. Find the house closest to the bus disaster. When John gets
home, he sees that Jose is dead. John hides the money and throws the
gun on the roof. When he gets into the house, he tells Tony and his
gang that stepmom fucked them over and took off with all the money.
While the gang tries to figure out what to do next, John has his son
climb on the roof to get the gun and Lynch calls in for enforcements.
His son gives John the gun and Loony is the first to die (Doris now
has Loony's shotgun). Lynch is the next to die while he tries to
circle around and ambush John, but John is too smart for that and
puts a slug in his chest (Doris finishes him off with a shotgun blast
to the balls for raping her). Dr. Fuji calls the police (who still
couldn't find John's farm!) and gives them all the information, while
Tony and Jessie (who is such a bad actor, he makes Tara Reid look
like a pro. He has an interview on the DVD, so you can judge for
yourself) try to get away. John begins to kill all the backup Lynch
called for (usually by gunshot, but there is some bad hand-to-hand
combat in there, too, as well as a fire gag). Tony grabs the dead
Jose's young son Fernando (Played by Jessus Quebus Jr., the real-life
son of the actor who played Jose) and uses him as a hostage. He will
give John the kid if he gives him the keys to his car. Before this
can happen, the police sirens rapidly get louder and John shoots and
kills Jessie. Lt. Sunset finally arrives and Tony uses Fernando as a
human shield. For some reason only known to Shervan, Tony throws away
his gun and Fernando and decides he would rather go hand-to-hand with
John. After a short fight, it ends with John and Lt. Sunset shooting
and killing Tony. John gives the bag of money to Jose's widow and
kids. Forget murder and rape, money solves everything, especially
money that is not yours to give away! Yes, this is as goofy as
it sounds, but there is so much more dialogue I haven't written down
that will make your head spin. One example is when Tony points a gun
at Fuji's head and says, "Apologize to me gook or I'll blow your
head off!" or when one of Lt. Sunset's cops takes a look at John
and says, "Who's that bear?" While not nearly as bat-shit
crazy as Shervan's other two previously released films, it is still a
mess of a film that will have you in stitches. Nearly everyone either
wears suits or sleeveless shirts and parachute pants, which makes it
totally 80's and 100% insane (just take a look at the martial arts
fight in the ring). Just enjoy it for what it is. If you can tell me
exactly what it is, you are a better person than I am. In any case, I
would recommend that you make Amir Shervan's films a permanent part
of your film library. Also known as AMERICAN
MURDER. Also starring Bret Johnston, Lareine, Buck Striker,
Keith Rosary, Don Jean Brown, Terry Amos, Allen Perada, Sam Travino,
Raymond Soto and David Kinder. Released on DVD by Cinema
Epoch in one of the worst designed DVD covers of 2014 but
beggars can't be choosers since this is the first time it has ever
been on home video. Not Rated.
LASERBLAST
(1978) - An early film from producer Charles Band (MANSION
OF THE DOOMED - 1976; CRASH!
- 1976; TOURIST TRAP
- 1978) that mixes teen angst with alien gadgetry. The film opens
with an alien (portrayed by makeup effects artist Steve Neil), armed
with a laser weapon that fits over the hand and forearm, trying to
escape from a dinosaur-like alien duo (stop-motion effects by Dave
Allen), who
are chasing him through the Arizona desert. The laser-carrying alien
is killed, but before the dino-aliens can collect the laser weapon
and the crystal medallion that operates it, a plane flies overhead
and the two aliens beat a hasty retreat back to their spaceship
before they are spotted. We then switch over to teen Billy Duncan
(Kim Milford; CORVETTE SUMMER
- 1978; who was well into his late-twenties when he essayed this
role), a lonely guy who lives with his absentee divorced mother, who
is once again leaving him alone to go on another "business
trip" to Acapulco (in other words, Mom's a slut). Billy
drives his yellow and white van to girlfriend Kathy's (Cheryl Smith; CAGED
HEAT - 1974) house to commiserate, but he is blocked by her
senile grandfather, Colonel Farley (Keenan Wynn; PIRANHA
- 1977), who babbles-on about "Operation Sandust" and
people not being who they say they are. Billy finally gives up, gets
in his van and leaves. To make his day even worse, Billy is pulled
over by pot-smoking cops Deputy Pete Unger (Dennis Burkley; NIGHTMARE
HONEYMOON - 1973) and Deputy Jesse Jeep (Barry Cutler), who
ticket him once again for speeding (Unger also makes an uncalled-for
remark about Billy's mom). To add insult to injury, Billy is
challenged to a race by town bullies Chuck (Mike Bobenko) and Froggy
(Eddie Deezen, in his film debut and the only time I can remember him
ever portraying a bully!), but his van won't start. When he finally
does get it started, Billy takes a drive out to the desert, where he
finds the laser weapon and the crystal medallion (he's a smart lad
and quickly learns how to use the weapon, blowing up cacti and tree
stumps). From this moment on, Billy's life will never be the same and
neither wll those who pick on him. There's one deadly caveat in using
the weapon, though: Every time Billy wears the crystal medallion and
fires the weapon, he slowly begins to transform into an alien
creature and starts to lose his compassion and humanity. To make
matters worse, government agent Tony Craig (Gianni Russo; LEPKE
- 1975) and the two dino-aliens are looking to gain possession of the
weapon. When Chuck and Froggy try to rape Kathy at a pool party,
Billy dons the medallion and uses the weapon to blow-up Chuck's car,
nearly killing Chuck and Froggy. Billy begins growing a metallic lump
on his chest and, as it gets bigger and bigger, a worried Kathy makes
him go see Dr. Mellon (Roddy McDowall; THE
LEGEND OF HELL HOUSE - 1973) for a check-up. Dr. Mellon
removes the metallic fragment from Billy's chest and plans on driving
it to a lab out of town later that night to have it analyzed, but the
alien Billy uses the weapon to blow up Dr. Mellon in his car as he is
driving down the highway. Billy then uses the weapon to kill Deputy
Ungar (he blows him up in a gas station outhouse!) and Deputy Jeep
(incinerated point-bla
nk)
and then turns his attention towards Chuck and Froggy (after blowing
a government search plane out of the sky); killing them by blowing
them up in Chuck's new muscle car. The alien Billy then kills a
stoner and steals his van (blowing up a STAR
WARS billboard along the way, in a humorous bit), driving it
to town and using the weapon to lay waste to everything he can find,
including cars, telephone booths, a couple of newspaper stands and
the town's sheriff (Ron Masak). The dino-aliens put an end to the
madness by killing Billy with a death ray and take the weapon and the
medallion with them as they streak off in their spaceship. This
is a fun, if disjointed, little horror film, directed by Michael Rae
(his only directorial effort, although he was a Producer and Second
Unit Director on SINNER'S
BLOOD - 1970) and written by Franne Schacht (who appears as
the sheriff's secretary) and Frank Ray Perilli (ZOLTAN,
HOUND OF DRACULA - 1978), that contains a little bit of
everything, including action, aliens, explosions, stunts, minor gore
and even a small bit of topless nudity, all wrapped-up in a tight
little PG-rated package. Kim Milford, who tragically died in 1988 of
complication of heart surgery at the age of 37, is quite good as
Billy and his transformation into a soulless alien creature is quite
effective, but the film basically falls apart during the second half,
as it seems some scenes were never filmed (or were filmed and didn't
work) and the final twenty minutes are a disjointed, confusing mess
where the alien Billy just goes bonkers for no rhyme or reason.
Still, LASERBLAST contains
enough weirdness (Dennis Burkley and Barry Cutler are the unlikeliest
cop duo in screen history, smoking dope, eating each other's food and
ogling women with wild abandon) and inventiveness (the stop-motion
aliens and the weapon itself) to be recommended viewing. Also
starring Rick Walters, Simmy Bow, Joanna Lipari, Wendy Wernli and
Janet Dey. Producer Charles Band and director David DeCoteau (using
the pseudonym "Julian Breen") remade the film as ALIEN
ARSENAL in 1999, turning it into a typical watered-down
"nerds vs. bullies" high school action comedy. Originally
available on VHS by Media
Home Entertainment and later released on DVD by Cult Video/Koch
Vision. Rated PG.
LIBIDO
(1965) - Surprisingly adult Italian giallo film from the
mid-'60s, co-directed by Ernesto Gastaldi (THE
LONELY VIOLENT BEACH - 1971), who wrote some of the best
giallo films, including A...FOR
ASSASSIN (1966), THE
SWEET BODY OF DEBORAH (1968), THE
STRANGE VICE OF MRS. WARDH (1971), DEATH
WALKS AT MIDNIGHT (1972) and my favorite giallo of all time, TORSO
(1973). While basically a four-character play, this film will have
you hooked from the very first frame to the very last image.
As a young boy, Christian saw his father kill a young woman in a
bedroom whose walls are mirrors. Now an adult, Christian (an
impossibly young Giancarlo Giannini, here billed as "John
Charlie Johns"; THE
BLACK BELLY OF THE TARANTULA - 1971) is going to live in a
creepy house he inherited from his father, who died twenty years
earlier, the same house where he saw his father kill the woman.
Joining Christian on this trip are his fiancee Eileen (Dominique
Boschero; IGUANA
WITH THE TONGUE OF FIRE - 1971), Paul (Luciano Pigozzi, using
his pseudonym "Alan Collins"; THE
DEVIL WITH SEVEN FACES - 1971), Christian's ad-hoc guardian
since his father's death, and Paul's young wife Brigitte (Gastaldi's
wife Maraa Chianetta, using the name "Mara Maryl"; she was
one of the writers of THE
GREAT ALLIGATOR - 1979). Christian is to inherit the house
and his father's vast fortune in three months, when he turns 25, but
until then, Paul, who is executor of his father's estate, is in
charge, of the house and the fortune. Christian and Paul have a
volatile relationship, as we discover early in the film (Paul likes
to remind Christian that he is in charge until he turns 25 and
Christian has anger issues). Christian tells Eileen that he doesn't
feel right about coming to the house (He hasn't been here for over
two decades, ever since his father murdered the woman), but her
presence makes him feel better. Paul and Brigitte take the mirrored
room as their bedroom and, that night, Christian watches Brigitte
dance the can-can and then do a striptease in the mirrored room,
stopping to make love to Paul. While watching the show (Brigitte may
very well know he is watching), Christian gets an eerie feeling and
runs away, saying, "Not like my father! God, I'm not like my
father!" Also that night, Eileen notices someone jiggling the
door knob to her bedroom, but then it stops. Could it have been
Christian? (Since this is the '60s and they are not married,
Christian and Eileen have separate bedrooms.)
The next morning, everyone is outside enjoying the sunny weather. as
we discover that the house is located next to a cliff that overlooks
the ocean. Brigitte, who is wearing a skimpy bikini (With smiling
cats imprinted on it. I'm sure Freud would have a lot to say about
it!), asks Paul about Christian, Paul telling her that when Christian
was a boy, he had a nervous breakdown, Paul finding him passed-out
outside the mirrored bedroom. As a boy and a teenager, Christian
spent time in a mental institution, but he told no one what happened
on that fateful day. Brigitte asks Paul if Christian is dangerous and
Paul replies, "I hope not." Later in the day, Christian
hears music coming from his favorite childhood toy, a Jiminy Cricket
wind-up spinning ceramic figurine, and he goes to investigate. When
he opens the door, he discovers his father's rocking chair seemingly
rocking on its own and on a table next to it is his father's favorite
pipe, still smoking, as if someone was using it. We then discover
that Brigitte is a cocktease, coming on to Christian, but when he
asks her why she married such an "old fogey", she gets
defensive and walks away in a huff. During a thunderstorm that night,
Christian sees someone dressed as his father when he looks out a
window. He grabs Eileen, telling her what he saw, so they both go
outside, but find nothing. Christian wonders if Paul is trying to
drive him mad, but Eileen tells him to stop being ridiculous, Paul
has been a "father" to him ever since his real father
passed away. We then discover that something is going on between Paul
and Eileen, Paul telling her that they must "act quickly".
Just what is going on?
The next morning, Paul and Eileen go to town together in Paul's car.
Something Brigitte mentions to Christian in passing, makes him jump
in his car and try to follow them. He finds Paul's car parked next to
a hotel, waiting for hours in his car (a taking a pistol out of his
glove box) until Paul and Eileen exit the hotel. When hee sees Eileen
putting her arms around Paul and kissing him, Christian drives home
and begins to choke Brigitte with his bare hands as she lays on a bed
in the mirrored room. Paul enters and a fight ensues, Christian
pulling the pistol on him. He accuses Paul of trying to drive him
crazy so he will inherit his father's fortune. He even accuses Paul
of marrying Brigitte because she looks just like the woman his father
murdered. He then calls Eileen a "whore", telling her that
he saw her and Paul exiting the hotel. Eileen can't take it any more
and tells Christian that she and Paul went to the hotel to talk to
his psychiatrist, Dr. Berge. When Christian asks Eileen why they had
to talk to his doctor, she removes a scarf from her head revealing a
couple of deep gashes on her face, telling Christian that he did that
to her last night. Christian lowers the gun, telling Eileen that he
has no memory of doing it. She tells him that ever since he came to
this house, he would enter her bedroom at night with a wild look on
his face and he behaved "horribly", but he would have no
memory of it the next morning. She told Paul what was happening and
they thought it was best not to say anything until they talked to his
doctor, who is coming to the house tomorrow. Christian tries to shoot
himself in the head, but Paul grabs the gun in the nick of time,
Christian collapsing and passing out from exhaustion. The next
morning, Paul drives to the hotel to pick up Dr. Berge, but he's not
there. When Paul calls the doctor's office, he discovers something
that will change the course of everyone's lives. Think you know what
it is?
When Christian wakes up, he discovers Eileen's semi-nude body lying
on the floor, bloody and dead. Did he have one of his episodes and
kill Eileen? Or is there another explanation? Since this is a
four-character play and one of them is dead, you may think you know
the answer, but you'd be wrong! When Brigitte discovers what
Christian has done, she locks him in his bedroom, while Paul races
back to the house. Paul then discovers why the rocking chair
seemingly moves by itself (it's quite ingenious) and he starts
putting the pieces together. But will he survive the day? What are
the killer's motivations? Let me just say that nothing is as it seems
(it surprised me and I am not easily surprised) and money is a deadly
motivation. Oh, and the sins of the father can be repeated by the
son, but for different reasons (The ending it totally apt, in a
twisted sort of way).
You would think that a film with only four characters would have
some boring stretches, but you would be wrong. It is surprisingly
adult in its approach, something unusual for a film made in this time
period, especially a genre film. This is also Ernesto Gastaldi's
first film as a director, co-directing and co-writing it with Vittorio
Salerno (NO,
THE CASE IS HAPPILY RESOLVED - 1973), both taking the
singular directorial pseudonym "Julian Berry Storf"
(Gastaldi using "Julian Berry" and Salerno using
"Victor Storff" as screenwriters, based on a story from
Gastaldi's wife Mara). This is a quick moving film with excellent
performances all around (Much later, Giannini would spill his guts
[literally!] to Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lechter in HANNIBAL
- 2001) and a conclusion you will never see coming. It surprises me
that Gastaldi (who is still alive at the time of this review and has
been married to Mara since 1960) only directed five films during his
career, as he works wonders here with what has to be a very low
budget. Supposedly made in 18 days on a bet, it doesn't look it, as
the sequences shot in the house, especially in the mirrored room, are
shot with a visual flair not usually seen in low budget genre films.
The lush black and white photography, by Romolo Garroni (listed in
the credits as "Romy Garron"), also belies the low budget.
While there is no nudity or extreme violence here, some scenes are
daring for its time, especially Eileen's death and the nihilistic,
unexpected ending (once you see it, you'll know what I mean).
Recommended to me by a friend across the pond (Thanks, Steven!), I
enjoyed this slice of supreme retribution and if you're a fan of
obscure giallo flicks, you are certain to enjoy this one, which is as
rare as they come. Never available theatrically or on home video in
any format in the United States, the only way to see it is on YouTube
(Search "Libido1965"), who offer a serviceable widescreen
print in its original Italian with non-removable English subtitles.
Ever since I installed YouTube on my Roku 3, the site has been
getting quite a workout from me, because it is the only way to see
these obscure films. Believe me when I say that you can find nearly
anything there (Except for my Holy Grail, VOODOO
HEARTBEAT - 1972!). While I know that black and white films
are not in "fashion" (One of my friends refuses to watch
black and white film because, and I quote, "Real life is not in
black and white!". I really need to get better friends!), I wish
some daring company would license these rarely-seen films so those of
us who appreciate them can see them remastered. I can dream, can't I?
Gastaldi and Salerno would later join forces and co-direct the
rarely-seen SCREAMS
IN THE NIGHT (a.k.a. SOULS:
THE FORCE OF EVIL - 1981), which can also be found on
YouTube (look for a review soon). Sergio Martino, director of TORSO
(1973), MOUNTAIN OF
THE CANNIBAL GOD (1978) and SCREAMERS
(1980), was this film's Production Manager. He and Gastaldi would go
on to have a fruitful relationship in filmmaking, Gastaldi writing or
co-writing the majority of Martino's films. This film is Not Rated.
LOVE
ME DEADLY (1972) - Lurid and
surprisingly well-made film about a subject (considered taboo at the
time) that contains some excellent editorial touches and acting. The
film opens with a montage of a young Lindsay Finch and her father
having fun in a whole bunch of places, until one day, while her Daddy
is pushing her on a swing, she falls off and breaks her arm. She
still loves her Daddy, especially when he gives her a teddy bear as a
present. We then switch to the present, where a full grown Lindsay
(Mary Wilcox; BEAST
OF THE YELLOW NIGHT - 1970; BLACK
OAK CONSPIRACY - 1977) is attending the funeral of a man she
doesn't even know. When all the people have paid their respects to
the body of the man in an open casket and have left, Lindsay walks
up to the casket, is aroused sexually (you can see it in her face,
especially her eyes) and gives the bearded corpse (played by the
film's director, but more on him later) a lingering kiss on the lips
that doesn't go unnoticed by funeral director Fred McSweeney (Timothy
Scott; THE FARMER - 1977). We
next see Fred picking up street hustler Billy-Jo (I. William Quinn),
paying him twenty-five dollars for sex and then telling him that he
is married and will have to do the deed where he works (He tells
Billy-Jo that he is a veterinarian!). Billy-Jo strips naked
(surprisingly full frontal naked shots) and lays on a metal table,
where he complains that it is cold. Before he can do anything, Fred
straps Billy-Jo to the table, sticks a huge needle in his arm to
drain him of his blood, cuts his neck with a scalpel and embalms him
alive (This scene is very effective, as Billy-Jo pleads for his life
over-and-over as he slowly dies.). Fred belongs to a necrophilia cult
and plans to use Billy-Jo's embalmed body for their naked
sex-with-the-dead ritual. Fred also wants Lindsay to join in with
them, but that will have to wait a while. Lindsay throws a party at
her house, where we meet Wade Farrow (the late Christopher Stone; THE
HOWLING - 1981), a swinging guy (and Lindsay's long-time
friend) who would like nothing more than to make Lindsay his next
conquest. He traps Lindsay in her bedroom (where he finds her hugging
that teddy bear) and tries to make love to her, but she is so
turned-off by the thought of making love to a man with a pulse that
she scratches his face. He leaves and she goes back to the party. The
next time we see Lindsay, she looking at the funeral notices in the
local newspaper and finds a new corpse for her to visit. She waits
for everyone to leave and then tries to kiss the corpse, only to
discover that his nose has been reconstructed with putty, which makes
her scream and run away, directly into the arms of the deceased's
brother, art gallery owner Alex Martin (Lyle Waggoner, a Carol
Burnett Show regular and also co-star of TV's WONDER
WOMAN [1975-1979], who gives a surprisingly strong
performance here). Alex looks strikingly like Lindsay's dead father,
which stirs something inside her, enough for her to check him out
with binoculars at his brother's burial and peeping at him through
his art gallery front window before running away when he notices her.
When Lindsay goes to her next funeral, she is approached by Fred, who
tells her that he knows what she likes (He says, "It's called
necrophilia!") and he will be contacting her by letter when his
cult has their next ritual. Lindsay forgives Wade for his attempted
rape and asks him to accompany her to an opening at Alex's art
gallery. Before you know it, Lindsay ends up with Alex and Wade hooks
up with a female patron at the gallery and all four of them have
dinner together at a restaurant (this whole sequence is done without
dialogue, just a love ballad titled "You're Something
Special", sung by Kit Fuller [who also sings the title tune],
playing on the soundtrack). Alex discovers early on that Lindsay
doesn't like to be touched sexually, but he proposes marriage,
thinking she will change her mind once they are wed. She accepts and
they get married, but Alex soon finds out that she still can't stand
to be touched and ends up sleeping in a separate bedroom until she
changes her mind. Lindsay gets her first letter from Fred and decides
to go to the funeral home at midnight, but her car is seen by Wade,
who is on a pay phone trying to make a late night visit to another
girl (yet he still has feelings for Lindsay), and he follows her to
the funeral home. Fred sees that Lindsay is not ready for a communal
necroplilia session, so he offers her some one-on-one time with a
dead body. Wade enters the funeral home and begins searching for
Lindsay, only to run into one of Fred's fellow ritual colleagues
(Louis Joeffred), who stabs Wade through the stomach with a huge
embalming needle, killing him. Lindsay screams, but Fred and his
ritual cult use Wade's strung-up body for one of their naked
necrophilia parties (this entire sequence is so well done, it's
nightmareish). Meanwhile, Alex becomes more and more concerned by
Lindsay's lack of sexual feelings for him and when he intercepts one
of Fred's registered letters to Lindsay, he decides to act on it and
discover the truth. He gives Lindsay the letter (he never opens it)
and waits outside in his car to see what she is up to. He follows her
to the funeral home and discovers her making love to a naked corpse.
He is repulsed, but before he can do anything, Fred stabs him to
death and embalms him. He
transports Alex's embalmed corpse to Lindsay's house and puts him in
her bed. Now she can make love to Alex all she wants, as we learn the
truth on how Lindsay's father actually died. While the subject
matter may seem tasteless to most people, first and only time
director/writer Jacques LaCerte (from 1977 through 1981, he was a
Drama and English instructor at Inglewood High School in Inglewood,
CA. and passed away at age 60 in 1988) manages to make the film a lot
more classier than most films that would later deal with the subject
of necrophilia, especially director Jorg Buttgereit's highly
over-rated NEKROMANTIK
(1987). There is a sheen of professionalism on display here,
something highly unusual for a film from a first-time director. The
editing (by Leo Shreve; QUEEN OF BLOOD
- 1966) of some of the scenes is extremely effective, especially the
intercutting of a young Lindsay with her father and a grown Lindsay
with Alex. The entire sequence of Wade's death and the cult's use of
his naked body is also one of the film's editorial highlights (You'll
know what I mean once you see it with your own eyes). While there is
some gore and blood (the bright red kind used in most of the
early-70's horror films), the film doesn't revel in it and it doesn't
need to because of the subject matter. Mary Wilcox is absolutely
convincing here, especially the way her face looks when she sees a
dead body. The real surprise is Lyle Waggoner, who is as good as he
would ever get. One wonders if Carol Burnett ever saw this film or
even knows about it (If she did at the time, would he even be one of
her sidekicks of her highly popular TV series?). All-in-all, LOVE
ME DEADLY is one of my favorite films to deal with
necrophilia. Director Alfred Sole's X-rated porn comedy DEEP
SLEEP, made the same year as this (it's very hard to find in
its complete version today), and Straw Weisman's DEADMATE
(1988) are two other good films that deal with the same subject
matter. H.B. Halicki, the late director and star of such action films
as GONE IN 60 SECONDS
(1974), THE JUNKMAN (1982) and DEADLINE
AUTO THEFT (1983), was an Associate Producer and appears as
a race car driver. Also starring Dassa Cates, Terri Anne Duvalis (as
the young Lindsay), Bruce Adams, Barbara Fisher and Michael Pardue as
Lindsay's father. Originally released on VHS by Video
Gems in one of those big boxes (this version was slightly cut of
male nudity) and then released uncut on DVD by Shriek Show. It was
then released as a double
feature DVD by Code Red
with the PG-rated college hazing drama THE
CURIOUS CASE OF THE CAMPUS CORPSE (1977). The widescreen
print on both DVDs is so sharp and detailed, you can actually see a
cameraman in the back seat of Lindsay's car in one scene and in the
rearview mirror of Alex's car in another, something I did not notice
on the fullscreen VHS. Rated R.
MARK
OF THE DEVIL (1970) - I'm
going to travel back to my teen years, when this film left a lasting
impression on my young brain. Between NIGHT
OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968) and LAST
HOUSE ON THE LEFT (1972), this is the film that gave me
nightmares at night. Not because of the extreme violence, but because
of the way it portrayed people in power, who accused people of doing
things they couldn't have possibly done and how the public
unquestionably accepted the accusations, mainly due to mass hysteria.
It was the first time I actually understood the repercussions of
being falsly accused and the circumstances of the people doing the
accusing, all for political or personal
gain. It was the time of Watergate, when President Nixon became
power-hungry and used the FBI and the IRS as political weapons,
destroying many innocent people's lives. My young mind could not
understand what all the fuss was about (it was on the news every
night and I could not understand why), but this film opened my eyes
and mind of what it meant being the target of a power-mad official. I
doubt that was this film's intentions, but it did make me feel this
way. OK, enough about my pre-teen trauma. Let's get to the film.
15th Century Europe: We watch as Albino (Reggie Nalder; DRACULA'S
DOG - 1977; DRACULA SUCKS
- 1978) tells a group of village mercenaries that he will pay them
handsomely if they raid a caravan of nuns, telling them to bring back
the monk and a few nuns to him alive. They attack the caravan,
killing and raping nuns and doing what Albino asked of them. We then
see the monk and three nuns in the village square, being accused of
witchcraft and of consorting with the Devil (One villager yells to
the monk, "You don't look horny now!"). The monk has his
hand chopped off, stripped naked and then tar-and-feathered, while a
crowd of villagers laugh and applaud. He is forced to run through the
village while people chase him (and eventually kill him). The nuns
are burned alive at the stake, with one burning nun cursing the
village and everyone in it to a fate worse than death. The villagers
don't realize that they are already living that life, as anyone can
point at them and call them a witch and, just like the nuns, be
killed without even a fair trial. They are living in a time of mass
hysteria, where death is preferrable to the treatment they will
receive. An on-screen scrawl and narrator announces: "This
motion picture shows three cases taken from authentic documents from
the time when witch-hunting had reached its peak and can only
give a slight idea of the cruelties of one of the blackest pages in
the history of Man."
Barmaid Vanessa Benedikt (Olivera Vuco; ANN
AND EVE - 1970) was in the crowd and what she saw affected
her. Back at the bar, Vanessa catches the eye of Count Christian von
Meruh (Udo Kier; FALL
DOWN DEAD - 2007), who is sitting with Chief Executioner
Jeff Wilkens (Herbert Fux; LADY
FRANKENSTEIN - 1971).Christian tells Albine that Lord
Cumberland will be arriving in town soon and it is his job to
rid this village of all witches. Albino complains, saying he is this
village's Witchfinder General, but Christian has a document proving
otherwise (but Albino can't read!). Before he leaves the bar, Albino
makes a lewd remark about Vanessa (He saw her and Christian making
eye contact). Later on, Albino comes back to the bar and puts the
moves on Vanessa. The following conversation takes place: Vanessa:
"I don't sleep with pigs!" Albino: "I could
denounce you as a witch!" Vanessa: "It's the only
way you can get women!" Albino then forces himself on Vanessa,
but she runs out to the bar and screams that Albino is trying to rape
her. Albino appears and accuses Vanessa of being a witch, pulling out
his "witch detector" (A sharp needle with a handle,
resembling an icepick) and sticks it into a mole on her face and then
her back, saying Vanessa must be a witch because she doesn't scream,
but Vanessa is simply a strong woman. Christian accuses Albino of
lying and proves that Albino's advocate (Johannes Buzalski) made up
the charges on Albino's orders. he has Jeff whip Albino in the bar
for all to see. Big mistake. Christian and Vanessa soon become
lovers, but their happiness will be short-lived.
Lord Cumberland (Herbert Lom; THE
SECRET OF DORIAN GRAY - 1970; THE
SECT - 1991) arrives and we learn that Christian studied
under him for three years. Albino has his advocate write-up charges
on Vanessa for being a witch. Lord Cumberland holds court and it
looks like he is a reasonable man, as he releases one innocent woman
on charges of being a witch, but that changes rather quickly. He
sentences the next woman, Deidre von Bergenstein (Gaby Fuchs; WEREWOLF
SHADOW - 1970), to be stretched on the rack until she admits
that her baby is the Devil's (She was actually raped by a Bishop).
Then Vanessa is brought before Cumberland. Albino's advocate reads a
list of made-up charges against her and Cumberland sentences her to
prison, where she is to be tortured until she confesses. Christian
tells Lord Cumberland that she is innocent, but he replies,
"She's beautiful, I'll give you that, but she's a witch!"
Walter, a nobleman (Adrian Hoven; the director of CASTLE
OF THE CREEPING FLESH [1968] and THE
LONG SWIFT SWORD OF SIEGFRIED [1971]), is accused of being a
sorcerer and Cumberland tells him that if he turns his fortunes and
the deeds to his lands over to the Church, he will find him not
guilty. Walter's answer is spitting in Cumberland's face. We then see
Walter's wife (Ingeborg Schöner) being tortured, first with
thumbscrews and then on the rack, where she is stretched and has the
bottom of her feet branded with an iron poker. She will suffer much
more before she dies, as will her husband, who is slowly being
tortured with drops of water hitting his forehead
(drip...drip...drip...), slowly driving him mad (The film breaks
every so often to show how the water torture affects Walter. It's not
pretty.). Diedre says to Cumberland, "I have nothing to confess.
I thank you for your mercy. May God have mercy on your soul.",
but Cumberland does not want to put her to death yet because, "I
want confessions, not corpses!" The poor woman is then put
through the worse torture of them all. She has her tongue ripped out
(A scene that had many audience members leaving the theater I was at
[The Colonial Theater in Pompton Lakes, NJ, where I saw many horror
films during my childhood]). When Albino is walking down the street,
he sees a nude woman in her bedroom window. He then breaks into her
house and rapes her. It's the only way this ugly man can have a
woman. It's either be raped by him or be accused of being a witch.
Lord Cumberland relieves Albino of his duties and we he protests,
calling Cumberland "impotent", Cumberland strangles him
with his bare hands (A very effective scene, for what happens in the
background, as a brass plate rattles against the ground like a hubcap
and stops rattling when Albino dies.). Christian sees his teacher
kill Albino and is taken aback, finally realizing that all this witch
stuff is just a power play. How can a so-called religious man so
callously kill a man? Lord Cumberland steps up the violence, killing
Diedre by burning her alive (it's hard to scream when you have no
tongue). he also makes Walter sit on a chair of nails while a fire
burns beneath him. Things get really out of hand, especially when a
puppeteer is accused of consorting with the Devil by Albino's
advocate (You really have to hear his accusations towards the
puppets!). The puppeteer's wife stabs the advocate in the eye with
Albino's witch detector. Will this madness never end? Will Christian
and Vanessa live happily ever after? We have yet to see the
"Spanish Boot" (Google it) or other painful torture devices
being used, as well as a very nihilistic ending, where no one lives
happily ever after.
This was strong stuff back in the day and, quite frankly, it is
still strong today. Not for the violence and torture but, rather, for
how innocent people fall under the spell of absolute power over life
and death. This was also my first taste of Udo Kier, who is horribly
dubbed here, but I didn't know how Kier spoke until I saw him in ANDY
WARHOL'S FRANKENSTEIN & DRACULA
(both 1973). At least Herbert Lom dubbed his own voice, because in
1971 (when I saw this film) I already knew what he sounded like. He
is quite good here as a basically honest man who allows himself to
cross over to the dark side, where being devoutly religious meant
being a murderer. But the film clearly belongs to Reggie Nalder. I,
and countless others, wanted to know as much as possible about him
(his face was like a skull covered in tight, burned skin) but, since
this was before the internet, we had to make do with his other
performances, especially the TV films THE
DEAD DON'T DIE (1974) and SALEM'S
LOT (1979), where he excelled at being evil. This film is
quite relevant today, where one man's lies and deceitfulness are
accepted by
the masses, no questions asked. But just like most disappointed
masses, they strike at even the innocent when the quilty ones can't
be touched, just like in this film where the villagers kill Christian
when Lord Cumberland realizes that the villagers want blood and he
successfully escapes. They string up Christian by his hands and put a
nutcraker-like device around his waist, sending metal spikes into his
body. The sad music, by Michael Holm (HOBO
WITH A SHOTGUN - 2011), enhances the film's desperate tone,
as director/co-screenwriter Michael Armstrong (HORROR
HOUSE - 1969; SCREAMTIME
- 1983, using the pseudonym "Al Beresford"), with an
uncredited assist from producer/co-screenwriter/actor Adrian Hoven
(who directed the unrelated sequel, MARK
OF THE DEVIL PART II [1973], featuring many of the same
actors here, but in different roles), fills the film with ungodly
torture, both physical and mental (I am a firm believer that mental
torture is so much worse than physical torture. Physical pain goes
away. Mental torture is hard to get rid of.). Armstrong wanted to end
the film with a supernatural finale, where the dead rise from their
graves and surround Christian, but Hoven, who took over directing the
film, filmed the ending we have all seen, which I think works far
better (Supernatural themes have no place in this movie). Armstrong
actually filmed his ending, which Hoven reportedly burned. All that
exists of Armstrong's footage are photographs, some of which are
shown in the German lobbycards for the film.
This West Germany production, filmed as HEXEN
BIS AUFS BLUT GEQUALT ("Witches Tortured To
Death"), was released theatrically in the United States by Hallmark
Releasing, who also released DON'T
LOOK IN THE BASEMENT (1973) and DON'T
OPEN THE WINDOW (1974) on unsuspecting audiences. It was a
qualified hit, thanks to it being "The First Film To Be Rated
'V' For Violence" (A made-up rating, but try telling that to a
kid!) and handing out "stomach
distress bags" to theater audience members (I still have
mine!). I couldn't get into the theater on opening day, as the line
to get in stretched clear around the block, something quite unusual
for a movie theater in such a small town. This also had many VHS
releases, the first one by Vestron
Video and then followed by some unauthorized ones, all in
incomplete form. The DVD,
from Blue Underground,
is not perfect (The opening minutes are speckled with dirt, but it
soon clears), but it is better than all the VHS releases, as it is
uncut and in its proper OAR. It is also chock-full of extras,
including interviews with Udo Kier, Herbert Fux, Gaby Fuchs, &
Ingeborg Schöner, a feature length commentary by Michael
Armstrong, theatrical trailer, radio spots, and a poster & stills
gallery. A very nice package. Also available on Blu-Ray from Arrow
Video. Also starring Günter Clemens, Doris von Danwitz,
Dorothea Carrera, Marlies Petersen and Percy Hoven. Not Rated,
but if it were to be submitted to the MPAA today, it would probably
get an R-Rating.
MONSTER
MAN (2003) -
Who says they don't make good horror movies anymore? This
horror/comedy movie is an excellent example of how to make a good
film on a low budget. It's so good, it should have gotten a
theatrical release. Two friends, the
virginal Adam (Eric Jungmann) and loudmouthed Harley (Justin Urich),
are on a road trip in Adam's Chevy Vista Cruiser so he can tell Betty
Ann, his one true love, how he really feels about her before she gets
married to another man. Along the way they are shadowed by a black
hearse, get a flat, run out of gas (and steal gas from a parked
camper with a headless corpse in it, but not before Harley accidently
sucks out liquid from the camper's septic tank), pick up (or get
picked up by) a hitchhiker called Sarah (the beautiful Aimee Brooks),
have drinks in a bar where everyone but them is missing an appendage
and are attacked by the title creature (Michael Bailey Smith) who
drives a huge monster truck. This film is not only extremely funny
(including a STAR WARS sex
scene and a piece of black humor involving a corpse in Adam's back
seat) but also very bloody, as in the opening scene we witness a man
having his head squeezed in a vice until it explodes, later on we see
another man's legs and head run over by the monster truck and a final
20 minutes that has to be seen to be believed (which includes a major
plot twist). Director/writer Michael Davis, who usually makes
romantic comedies, is to be commended for making a film with
characters we care about. Adam may be anal retentive (and a Velcro
fanatic) and Harley may come off as a jerk some of the time, but we
feel their comraderie and friendship become stronger as the film
progresses. Also starring Joe Goodrich as Brother Fred (believe me
when I say you won't soon forget him) and a cameo appearance by Bobby
Ray Shafer (PSYCHO COP
- 1989) as a cop with a thing for comparing Adam and Harley's asses
to tires. This is one bloody good show (effects by Todd Masters) with
excellent Dolby 5.1 sound (listen to the "I'm gonna get you"
scene in the motel) that should be seen by all those interested in
this web site. A Lions Gate
Home Entertainment Release. Rated R, but believe me when I
tell you this is hard R territory.
MY
NAME IS BRUCE (2006) - Bruce
Campbell, who also directed, has fun lampooning his image in this
amiable horror comedy. The small mining town of Gold Lick (whose
population is either 333 or 339, depending on what sign you read) is
besieged by a Chinese demon called Guan-Di (James J. Peck), when
Bruce Campbell-loving teen Jeff (Taylor Sharpe) wakes it up from a
long-dormant sleep after removing a protective medallion from the
entrance of an old mining shaft where the demon was being held
captive. Jeff manages to escape, but his three teen friends don't
fare too well, as Guan-Di dismembers and beheads them with his trusty
staff sword. We are then introduced to Bruce Campbell the
(fictitious) actor, who is in the middle of starring in CAVE
ALIENS 2 and is considered an insufferable wanker by cast and
crew alike (So much so, that when he orders crewmember Tiny [Adam
Boyd] to fetch him a lemon water, he grabs an empty bottle out of the
garbage, pisses in it, hands it to Bruce, only to have Bruce complain
that it's too warm, but he drinks it anyway!). Bruce's boorish
behavior knows no bounds, whether it's handing one of his rabid fans
a stick of deodorant ("Here, you know how to use this?"),
pushing a paraplegic's wheelchair away with his foot or demanding
free a free lap dance in a strip club (he is flatly refused). Bruce's
personal and professional lives are a complete mess. He's recently
divorced from wife Cheryl (Ellen Sandweiss; Campbell's
co-star in THE EVIL DEAD -
1983), is an alcoholic (he drinks so much, even his dog is a drunk!),
drives a junker car and lives in a dilapidated trailer (Things are so
bad, he drinks the alcohol in his dog's dish when he discovers that
there is no booze left in the trailer. It's a laugh-out-loud scene.).
When Jeff shows up at his trailer door at 4:30 in the morning and
begs him to come to Gold Lick to help the citizens fight Guan-Di (who
we find out is the Chinese patron saint of bean curd!), Bruce thinks
Jeff is pitching an idea for a new film and slams the door in Jeff's
face. Jeff ends up knocking-out Bruce with a baseball bat, throwing
him in the trunk of his car and driving him to Gold Lick, where Bruce
is welcomed as a hero by the Mayor (Ben McCain, who along with
brother Butch McCain [as "The McCain Brothers"], interrupt
the film a few times to play guitar and sing the song "The
Legend Of Guan-Di", whose lyrics keep the audience up-to-date
with the proceedings) and the entire Gold Lick population, who are
dwindling in number and losing their heads to Guan-Di's sword. Bruce
thinks the whole situation is a low-budget film shoot; a birthday
present set-up by his agent Mills (Ted Raimi; SKINNER
- 1993), so he plays along, thinking everything that is happening is
nothing but an elaborate joke to bolster his fragile ego (Little does
he know that Mills is fucking his ex-wife!). Bruce begins falling for
local girl Kelly Graham (Grace Thorsen), Jeff's divorced mother,
still not realizing that his life is actually in mortal danger. As
the film progresses, Bruce begins to actually do some good (after a
particularly cowardly start) and slowly gains back his humility and
humanity. Only Kelly seems to realize that Bruce is not taking the
situation as seriously as he should, but she play along for the good
of the town and finds herself falling for Bruce's charms. The finale
finds Bruce, Kelly and Jeff facing Guan-Di alone, armed only with
bean curd, some Campbell movie memorabilia and a few sticks of
dynamite. This reverential comedy has some laugh-out-loud
moments and some spot-on dialogue (When the entire town interrupts
his first kiss with Kelly, Campbell screams out, "For the love
of God, I can smell her Chapstick!"), but a lot of it will go
over the heads of those who never heard or are not fans of Campbell.
It also makes some poignant statements about the state of celebrity
and fandom in the world today, but not at the expense of either the
celebrities or the fans. Bruce Campbell has a field day parodying his
image and Mark Verheiden's screenplay spares no Campbell film from
some very sharp barbs (When Campbell carjacks an old lady's car while
retreating Gold Lick in a cowardly moment, the old lady screams at
him, "You were the worst thing about MOONTRAP!").
There are some laugh-till-you-cry moments on view here, such as the
miniature angel and devil on Campbell's shoulders debating him
returning to Gold Lick (both angel and devil portrayed by Campbell in
the appropriate costumes) or the director of CAVE ALIENS 2
replacing an absent Campbell with a stunt dummy and no one notices!
Campbell does a grand job as actor and director (much better than he
did with THE MAN
WITH THE SCREAMING BRAIN - 2005), making MY
NAME IS BRUCE a rare treat: A horror comedy that actually
delivers the goods. It's funny, gory and moves at a brisk clip. Ted
Raimi plays three roles here: Mills the agent; Ted the sign painter
(who keeps changing the population number on Gold Lick's welcome sign
as Guan-Di dispatches the townspeople); and Wing, a Chinaman who
warns the town of their impending doom. Two of them have their heads
cut off. Be sure to stick around during the closing credits to see
The McCain Brothers get their long overdue comeuppance. Also starring
Tim Quill, Dan Hicks, Logan Martin, Ali Akay, Ariel Badenhop and
Jennifer Brown. An Image Entertainment
DVD Release. Rated R.
NIGHT
OF THE DEMON (1979) - You
know you're in for something very special when, right in the
beginning, we see a bigfoot rip off a camper's arm and his stump
bleeds into a bigfoot's footprint. Yes folks, this is the only
bigfoot gore film to see if your taste is
for bloody, atrociuosly-acted and badly-plotted flicks about a
sasquatch with a grudge. After discovering a newly discovered reel of
film which purportedly shows a bigfoot, Professor Nugent (Michael J.
Cutt) and five of his students go on a field trip to the area where
the film was found (the photographer was never found), in hopes of
finding proof that bigfoot does exist. They begin by asking the
townspeople for some info and learn about Crazy Wanda (Melanie
Graham), a woman who lives deep in the woods and may have some kind
of connection to the bigfoot. After learning some background info
about Crazy Wanda and a sect of inbred religious fanatics who live in
the forest, our stupid group of need-to-know-it-alls decide to trek
through the woods and look for them. Meanwhile, bigfoot is going on a
tear, savagely butchering a naked couple screwing in a van, killing a
camper in a sleeping bag by swinging him wildly overhead and impaling
him on a tree branch and, in the film's highlight, yanking the penis
off a biker when he stops to take a leak. Our thirsty for knowledge
sextet break up a ritual being performed by the fanatics and have
their boat stolen, which is their only way to return to civilization.
Instead of being worried like normal people would, they decide to
stick with their plan and try to locate Crazy Wanda. Professor
Nugent's wife, Susan (Lynn Eastman), is having terrible nightmares
back home, where she dreams of her husband having his throat torn out
by the bigfoot (this does not lead anywhere later on in the film).
After one of the student is mauled on the back by the bigfoot (he
survives), they find Crazy Wanda's house and notice that all her
windows have bars on them. Wanda lets them in (after the Professor
gives her a cinnamon stick), but all she does is sit in her rocking
chair and stare at a locked room. The Professor then tells his
students a couple more horror stories about the bigfoot: He kills a
guy chopping wood with his own axe by planting it in his shoulder and
he kills two knife-wielding Girl Scouts (!) by grabbing their arms
and making them stab each other. Why the Professor decides to tell
his students such horrific stories at this point only the
screenwriter (Mike Williams) can say. It is finally that time in the
movie for our six heroes to face the bigfoot and it turns out that it
may not be
a bigfoot after all (OK, it's half-bigfoot), just Crazy Wanda's son
who was born malformed years earlier after she was raped by a real
bigfoot and her preacher father made her drink poison to try to abort
the baby. It didn't work and, boy, is he one pissed-off individual.
In a finale that can best be described as surreal, bigfoot traps and
kills all the students in Wanda's house, each proceeding kill getting
gorier and gorier (it's also hilarious, as each student just stands
there waiting for their turn to be slaughtered) until only the
Professor is left (barely alive). Did I forget to mention that this
entire sequence is shot in super slo-mo? I just love NIGHT
OF THE DEMON, even though everything in it is just plain
wrong and politically incorrect, not to mention piss-poor technically
in every department. This film wallows in the gore and director James
C. Wasson (who, regrettably, never made anything else) linger on the
red stuff lovingly, some would say a little too long for comfort. The
crank-yanking scene and the finale are particularly juicy as a man is
beaten to death with his own intestines and the Professor has his
face forced down on a hot stove until his flesh stretches like string
cheese when pulled away. These aren't top-of-the-line special
effects, but they are rather unnerving. It's also filled with a lot
of "What The Fuck!?!?" moments, like the rocking chair cam,
the student who takes photos while he is being attacked and Girl
Scouts carrying big-ass knives (I'm sure the GS didn't OK this). The
acting is generally poor but, surprisingly, hardly hurts this film at
all, as you will probably sitting there slack-jawed at the frequent
bloody visuals on view (and I'm not exagerrating, this is one bloody
film). The only piece of "acting" that was noticable was
when one of the female students, seeing that their boat is missing,
says, "Oh my God, my God! What are we going to do?" like
she was reading it off of cue cards for the first time. This is one
of those films where everything should fail but, somehow, it all gels
together for a wildly outrageous experience which words (such as
these) cannot begin to describe. This gets my highest recommendation.
Also starring Joy Allen, Bob Collins, Jodi Lazarus, Richard Fields,
Michael Lang and stuntman Shane Dixon as the Bigfoot. NIGHT
OF THE DEMON was a very early VHS
release from VCII
and later was available on tape in a terrible EP-mode recording from Gemstone
Entertainment. The version I viewed was on DVD from a pirate
outfit called Miracle Pictures. The print was in pretty good shape
and is only marred by some static sound for a couple of seconds
throughout the film. Also available on legitimate DVD
from Code Red, but the
presentation is lacking and looks no better than the pirate DVD.
Not Rated.
NIGHT
OF THE LEPUS (1972) - Let
me preface this review by stating the following: This has to be the
silliest horror film ever financed by a major studio (MGM). Anyone
who thinks giant bunny rabbits are scary should have their heads
examined. That said, this film is one of my favorite guilty
pleasures, for all the wrong reasons, of course. When Rancher Cole
(Rory Calhoune) loses his best horse when it breaks it's leg in a
rabbit hole, that is the last straw, as the overabundance of wild
rabbits have destroyed most of Cole's grazing land for his cattle.
Fed up, Cole goes to the university to look up old friend Professor
Elgin Clark (DeForest Kelley) for some help in getting rid of the
rabbits. Elgin recommends Roy and Gerry Bennett (Stuart Whitman and
Janet Leigh), two ecologists who have solved similar problems with
wolves. The Bennetts
take back a dozen rabbits to their lab and treat half of them with
an experimental hormone, hoping to disrupt the rabbits' reproductive
cycle. The treated rabbits were never supposed to be released back to
the wild (the hormone is still untested), but that's just what
happens when the Bennett's young daughter Amanda (Melanie Fullerton)
switches an untreated rabbit with a treated one and accidentally sets
it free to join the other wild rabbits. Pretty soon after, giant
rabbits ("The size of wolves!") are killing the populace,
leaving mangled bodies in their wake. Roy, Gerry, Elgin and Cole find
the giant bunnies' hiding spot (in an abandoned mine) and blow it up
with dynamite. But, since rabbits are burrowing animals, they escape,
so our group has to come up with another way to destroy them. Maybe
electricity will work? Ah, good old electricity. A giant monster's
worst enemy. This film works best as an unintentional comedy.
The sight of normal size adorable bunnies running around in slow
motion on miniature sets should bring a smile to everyone's lips. But
the truly laugh-out-loud moments come from the attack scenes, as
hordes of confused rabbits run around with fake blood smeared on
their furry faces, the camera closing in on their buck-toothed mouths
while grunts and growls of what sound like dobermans wail on the
soundtrack. Let's not forget the awful full-size rabbit suits worn by
some hapless extras that are on view whenever a human is attacked.
Surprisingly, director William F. Claxton (who was mainly a director
of episodic TV until his death in 1996) plays everything super
seriously and it is very bloody for a PG rated film. There's
bloody shots of mutilated kids, adults and rabbits (who are
mercilessly hit with red paintballs whenever cast members fire
rifles, shotguns or machineguns at them) and the attacks on humans
are especially bloody. It's that bright red blood that was used in a
lot of early 70's horror films. It's not the least bit believable,
but it sure does look good on screen. I was surprised that the cast
of pros were able to keep a straight face throughout this entire
ridiculous film, but they do. Personally, I would have fired my
agent, but appearing in this didn't seem to do too much damage to
their careers. Besides, I wouldn't trade the sight of giant bunnies
running down a highway and jumping over the camera in slow-motion for
anything in the world. Am I glad this film was made? Hell, yes! Long
sought after by collectors and traded for years on the grey market in
terrible third generation dupes (usually with Dutch subtitles),
Warner Video finally relented in 2005 and released a beautiful
widescreen print of NIGHT OF THE LEPUS on
DVD. You can now throw away all your lousy dupes and see this insane
film as it was meant to be seen. Just a word of warning: If you have
stitches, be prepared to bust a few. Originally released to theaters
on a double bill with William Grefe's STANLEY
(1972). A Warner Video
Release. Rated PG. Do yourself a favor and watch the
overwrought trailer on the DVD after the film is over for one last laugh.
100
TEARS (2007) - You know that old
Gary Lewis & The Playboys song "Everybody Loves A
Clown"? Well, that's total bullshit. Take a clown out of his
element, be it a circus or a birthday party, and you have one of the
scariest motherfuckers in the world. How would you like to run into a
clown in a dark alley? Me? I would stain my shorts. Serial killer
John Wayne Gacy was a birthday party clown and "serial killer
groupies" (those sick bastards) treasure his paintings of clowns
more than a fine art connoisseur would treasure a Van Gogh or Monet.
And another thing: I believe actor/director Bobcat Goldthwait's
surrealist comedy SHAKES THE CLOWN
(1991) is closer to the truth of lives of clowns than most people
believe (I'm mostly kidding...mostly). Clowns have been portrayed as
villains since films began, but they didn't really come into
prominence until the Chiodo Brothers horror comedy KILLER
KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE (1988) and Tim Curry's
goosebump-inducing portrayal of Pennywise
The Clown on the TV mini-series STEPHEN
KING'S IT (1990), After that, clown killers were the
protagonists in a lot of horror films (even up to this day,
especially with Rob Zombie's 31
- 2016), but none are more terrifying than the one in the film I am
about to review. This clown will blow your mind (literally) with his
non-stop slaughtering and doing it without uttering a single word, so
there are no wisecracks like in other killer clown movies. Even
though this ultra-low-budget horror film was once harder to find than
a funny bit in a Carrot Top comedy routine, it is now available in an
"Extended Director's Cut", which adds a lot more gore and a
little more exposition to give the characters some extra backbone in
the extra 7 minutes. The film begins in a bleak-looking room, where
Gurdy The Clown (Jack Amos) is applying his makeup while the camera
pans around his room, showing us all types of creepy clown
paraphenalia and then a bloodied girl tied-up on a mattress on the
floor. Instead of Gurdy killing the girl, a shot rings out, blood
splatters on the camera lens and it looks like Gurdy committed
suicide (This scene is pivital to the entire film, which made me even
enjoy the film more after it was over). We then switch to a week
earlier, where tabloid reporters Jennifer Stevenson (Georgia Chris)
and Mark Webb (screenwriter & producer Joe Davison) decide to
change from exploitative fictional stories to something real and
focus on a serial killer case where the killer is known as "The
Teardrop Killer" and try to do research on what makes a serial
killer tick. Meanwhile, at a halfway house where Gurdy the Clown is a
resident, he suddenly turns extremely violent, as he slices up a
black resident's face over-and-over with a big-ass meat cleaver (his
weapon of choice) and then cleaves another resident's head in two
while he is watching TV (both deaths are gory beyond belief and are
more realistic than the deaths shown in big-budget films). Gurdy then
gets into a fight with the halfway house's cook (the blooper reel on
the DVD shows that the meat cleaver is not a prop, as it puts a huge
hole into a steel pot!) and, after a short fight, he cuts off the
cook's head with the cleaver (another extremely effective gory
death). When an intern hears the commotion, Gurdy slices open his
back with the cleaver, spurting blood all over a wall. Another intern
runs for her life, only for Gurdy to stomp her head to a bloody pulp
and then he turns his attention to a wheelchair-bound resident, who
can't escape because there are a large set of stairs blocking her
way. Gurdy decapitates her and then pushes her wheelchair and
headless body down the flight of stairs (Man, this is a great way to
start a horror film!). Jennifer does some research on the internet on
the Teardrop Killer and discovers that at every murder site there
were traces of greasepaint. Gurdy continues his killing spree at the
halfway house, trapping a woman in the bathroom and disemboweling
her, her intestines falling to the floor (his cleaver has many uses),
slicing another male resident by nearly cutting him in half from the
crotch-up (Ouch!) and then snapping the janitor's neck before
escaping the halfway house. Jennifer's FBI sister (who we never see),
sends her a text message on her phone telling her about the brutal
slayings at the halfway house, so she and Mark go there to see if
they can get inside (The New Mexico license plate on Mark's car reads
"ROUTE66"). Lucky for them that Detective Duncan (Rod
Grant; and yes his name is a reference to Dunkin Donuts) is at the
murder scene, as he has a crush on Jennifer and lets them inside to
videotape what is left of the carnage (the coroner has already taken
the bodies away but, according to Det. Duncan, two people are still
missing and unaccounted for), but Mark finds the cook's head in the
oven and as our investigating team are taking a tour of the halfway
house, they find a living little girl. They bring her outside to a
surprised Det. Duncan, where the little girl cries, "He was
killing everyone!" We then see that Gurdy has tied a young woman
to a wooden table, both of her legs missing below the knees (her
character's name is identified as "Legs McPhinney", played
by Alanna Baker), screaming to her boyfriend Jeff (actor unknown, but
his hands are tied behind his back and there's a noose around his
neck) that "my legs are cold!". Gurdy tortures Jeff for a
little while and then makes him watch as he suffocates his girlfriend
and then kills Jeff with the cleaver. Young woman Christine (Raine
Brown) is headed out for a night on the town with her girlfriends
(Her mother tells her she is "dressed like a clown" [Clue
alert!]) while Gurdy kills a mechanic with his own portable circular
saw, cutting open his stomach and playing with his intestines, which
he pulls out slowly and puts in a bucket. For good measure, he cuts
off the mechanic's head with the cleaver. Christine is actually alone
in a dive bar, then gets oral sex from some male patron in the alley
(she also like to cut herself with a straight-razor) and generally
acts like a degenerate. Jennifer and Mark deduce by the pattern of
the killings throughout the years that the Teardrop Killer, could be
a carny or possibly a clown in a traveling circus, but is the
Teardrop Killer actually Gurdy or someone else? All of what I
described has happened in the first 30 minutes of the film, so there
is so much more bloodshed ond plot developments on view for the next
67 minutes (such as the guy who was performing cunnilingus on
Christine is found sliced to death in the alley), that this review
could go on forever describing every kill and the fine points on what
makes Gurdy tick. Besides the very realistic gore effects (done by
the director and his crew), you will see such sights as Jennifer and
Mark getting into a footchase with a midget named Drago (Norberto
Santiago), who knows more than he is willing to say, learn much more
about the mysterious Christine and even why Gurdy spares Drago's
life. You will also see a man get his feet chopped off, another man
gets his arms chopped off and still another man being cut in half,
his innards spilling onto the sidewalk, as Jennifer and Mark get
closer and closer to the truth that it becomes fatal to one of them.
We also learn from Drago that Gurdy's real name is "Luther
Edward Baxter" (Why do most serial killers have three names,
even the real-life ones?) and he once worked at the same circus Drago
did. There are actually two serial killers on the loose, but are they
connected in any way? I won't tell, but I have given you enough clues
to draw your own conclusions. For such a low-budget film, it is
chock-full of wall-to-wall unrated gore, a really decent plot (where
the "suicide" at the beginning is explained in a very
satisfying way) and not the normal bad acting you usually see in
films with budgets like this.
Director
Marcus Koch (ROT
- 1999; FELL - 2010; HI-8
- 2013), who usually supplies gore effects for other people's films,
such as GHOST LAKE
(2004); CLOSET SPACE
(2008); SWEATSHOP
(2010); SINNERS AND SAINTS
(2010); as well as many others, makes this film a virtual thrill ride
from beginning to end, with nary a dull moment in between.
Producer/Star Joe Davison (who directed and wrote the films EXPERIMENT
7 [2009] and FROST BITE
[2011]) turns in a really good script full of funny one-liners (most
of which he reserves for his character), but don't mistaken this film
for a comedy in any way. Most of the funny stuff are throw-away lines
of dialogue which you have to pay attention to appreciate and there
is an actual story here between the frequent gore scenes (This film
has a prediliction for showing human intestines as, besides the kills
I have already described, there is another guy who gets impaled with
the curved end of a crowbar, his intestines being pulled out and then
being strangled with them! There are so many intestines on display, a
sausage factory would be jealous.). You will also see nearly every
human appendage being chopped off, watch as a human eyeball is bitten
out of the head of a living victim and watch in amazement as a living
human body is reduced to a pile of bloody mush as it is repeatedly
hit with the cleaver and a sledgehammer. Nearly every way you can see
a person killed (even with a gun, because one does come into play in
an important scene) is shown on-screen without hiding anything, which
will have gorehounds squealing with delight. I have seen my fair
share of gory films, but I have not seen a film start with so much
gore and keep it coming throughout 97 minutes than I have with this
film. What's also even more amazing is this is a gore film with
characters you actually care about, very rare for a film of this
type. Sometimes the film's low-budget roots show, such as in some
scenes where fake grain was added in-camera to give it a more
"grindhouse" look, but you won't mind because of all the
amazing kills on view and how the film wraps itself up nicely at the
end. There is some clunky, inappropriate music in some scenes, but
don't let that deter you from one of the bloodiest experiences you
are bound to have in a long, long time. I can't recommend this film
enough and the ending will bring a big, sadistic smile to your face.
Make sure you stay through the end credits (the last few lines are a
howl!), for a final stinger. Originally released on a limited edition
DVD in 2008, which sold out quickly and was next to impossible to
find anywhere, but the fine folks at Unearthed Films and MVD Visual
released a longer Director's Cut on DVD in 2014 (with a reversable
cover), which contains the same extras as on the original DVD. along
with new ones. I especially liked the funny outtake reel (I'm a
sucker for those!), where things go wrong and people act like idiots
(There's one outtake where Mark is pelted by debris as he is on his
back and suddenly a big round aluminum vent falls on him, something
that wasn't planned. Thankfully, he wasn't hurt and laughed about
it.). Ted Geoghegan, who was screenwriter on such gore films as BARRICADE
(2006) and DON'T WAKE
THE DEAD (2008), was an Associate Producer here. Filmed in
Tampa, Florida. Also starring Kibwe Dorsey, Jerry Allen, Jeff Dylan
Graham, Krystal Badia, Clayton Smith, Jeremy King, Chris Antilian,
Christopher Jacobsen and Jori Davison. An Unearthed
Films/MVD Visual DVD Release. Not
Rated, and for good reason.
PEACEMAKER
(1990) - This is not the 1997
George Clooney-Nicole Kidman starrer of the same name, but director
Kevin S. Tenney's
excellent action/sci-fi story concerning two aliens, one good,
Townshend (Lance Edwards), and one a serial killer, Yates (the always
excellent Robert Forster), battling it out on Earth. With the help of
coroner Dr. Dori Caisson (Hilary Shepard, who sees about 20 bullet
wounds disappear on Townshend after a fight with the police), the
good alien (who is a cop on his home planet) try to track down and
kill the bad alien and also retrieve the black keycard to his
spaceship, which he lost during the scuffle with the police. His ship
is in the ocean and he needs to get into it before the tide washes it
out the sea. The only problem is, is that the Yates is tracking him,
along with a detective (Robert Davi) who thinks that Dori is being
held captive. The aliens can take as many hits to the body as
possible and survive. It just takes some time to regenerate (as when
Yates rips his hand off to escape a pair of handcuffs). The only way
to kill them is to put a bullet in their brainpan, whereby they
disintegrate within 20 seconds. Filmed on a low budget, this is still
good old-fashioned nail-biting stuff as director Tenney films the
frequent chase and fight scenes with verve and a sense of urgency.
The film also has a good sense of humor as when Townshend learns
English overnight by watching TV and Dori's interrogation by the
detectives when she tries to explain that both men they saw were
aliens. (She also says to one of the detectives: "The only
difference between a brown-noser and a shithead is depth
perception.") When Yates kidnaps Dori to trap and kill
Townshend, the story takes a shocking turn. In a surprise twist, none
of the aliens turn out who you think they are as Yates tells Dori
that he is a Peacemaker, the real good guy and he has been on Earth
for 20 years, sent to this planet as a intergalatic relocation
program. He tells Dori that there are hundreds like him on Earth and
that Townshend was sent here to kill one of the relocators. As a
matter of fact, the rest of the film is full of twists and turns and
action-packed. Nobody turns out to be who they say they are. Director
Kevin S. Tenney has never done better. He has made some pretty good
films (WITCHBOARD - 1986; NIGHT
OF THE DEMONS - 1988), some decent ones (WITCHTRAP
- 1989; WITCHBOARD 2: THE DEVIL'S DOORWAY
- 1993; THE ARRIVAL II
- 1998) and some terrible ones (THE CELLAR
- 1990; PINOCCHIO'S REVENGE
- 1996), but none as good as this one. It deserves to be a cult hit
or at least a sleeper. Watch this and enjoy the wild ride. Also
starring the always reliable Bert Remsen (CURFEW
- 1989, he died in 1999), John Denos and Wally Taylor. A Fries Home
Video Release. Rated R. A special shout-out to William Wilson
for getting me to view this film again. I'd forgotten how good it was.
PHENOMENA
(1984) - I remember going to see this film in a theater under the
name CREEPERS,
knowing full well that it was a hacked-up version of director Dario
Argento's original version (Much in the same way Argento's previous
film, TENEBRE [1982],
was severely edited and shown theatrically as UNSANE)
and coming away totally disappointed, thinking Argento lost his
mojo. I didn't think much of the film, even after seeing the full
version some sixteen years later, when
Anchor Bay Entertainment released it "uncut" (it wasn't)
and in widescreen on VHS and DVD in 1999, still thinking that Argento
lost his patented "touch", beginning with this film and
continuing with all the other films he directed in the '80s &
'90s. He still had flashes of brilliance, but I found his later films
bitterly disappointing, like he was trying way too hard to impress
audiences and failing miserably. I purposely put Argento's films on
moratorium after watching this film again back in the beginning of
the New Millennium and held off reviewing any of his films on this
site, with the exception of MOTHER
OF TEARS (2007) and [TERROR
AT THE] OPERA (1987), both of which I found exceptional.
Since I have been doing nothing but reviewing Italian and European
genre films for the past year, I decided to re-watch some Argento
films for the first time in over two decades, beginning with this
film, but I don't know if my brain has changed or my criteria on what
makes a good film has differed, because I was somewhat impressed with
this film, only with some minor caveats. For one thing, Argento's
choice of music (by Iron Maiden, Motorhead, Andi Sex Gang and Franky
Goes To Hollywood) is off-putting and seems to go against the grain
of what he was trying to convey (contrasting Simon Boswell &
Goblin's eerie, evocative score). It's like Argento was playing to
the stoner teen crowd in order to put asses in the seats, but when I
went to see this film on opening day, the theater was nearly empty
and there was nary a stoned teen to be seen. Another caveat is that
people in the film do the most stupid things possible at the worst
possible times, merely to advance the plot. If you can put up with
loud head-banging music and stupid people, you should have a good
time with this film. After this long-winded introduction, let's get
to the film itself.
A Danish schoolgirl (Fausta Avelli; RINGS
OF FEAR - 1978) misses her tour bus after it stops for a
bathroom break and it leaves without her, leaving her stranded
somewhere in the outskirts of Switzerland. She walks for miles and
finds a seemingly abandoned house, only it isn't because someone or
something is chained to a wall and we see it break free. After having
her hand pinned to a wall with scissors, the Dutch girl screams and
runs away into a tunnel system near a steep waterfall (perfect for
one of Argento's patented "one take, no edits" Steadicam
sequences), where the killer stabs the girl in the stomach with the
scissors and pushes her head through a plate of glass (in super
slow-motion, an Argento trademark) and she falls to her death down
the waterfall.
Eight months pass and we see Police Inspector Rudolf Geiger (Patrick
Bauchau; THE RAPTURE
- 1991) and his assistant Kurt (future director Michele Soavi; THE
CHURCH - 1989) interviewing entomologist Professor John
McGregor (Donald Pleasence; WARRIOR
OF THE LOST WORLD - 1983), whose young assistant, Greta, was
murdered by a serial killer who has claimed many young female victims
in the past eight months and some of their bodies, including Greta's,
have not yet been found. The Professor was recently in a serious
automobile accident, confining him to a life in a wheelchair. He has
a really intelligent female chimpanzee named Inga, who acts like his
service dog, getting him anything he needs, even pushing his
wheelchair. It is obvious that Inga loves him and he feels the same
way about her (this is important, folks!).
Jennifer Corvino (Jennifer Connelly; DARK
CITY - 1998), the daughter of a world famous movie actor,
arrives in Switzerland to attend the Richard Wagner School For Girls,
an exclusive academy for the daughters of the elite. Jennifer is
different from all the other girls, as we see in her first scene,
where she is in a chauffeur-driven limousine with Frau Bruckner
(Daria Nicolodi; Argento's INFERNO
- 1980), who is her escort and chaperone. While on her way to the
school for the first day, a bee flies into the limo and Frau Bruckner
and the chauffeur go to kill it, but Jennifer stops them, the bee
flying into her open hand. Jennifer tells them the bee will not sting
her and it doesn't, as we see Jennifer stroking the bee with one of
her fingers, telling Frau Bruckner that she loves insects and they
love her back. Once at the school, Jennifer meets her new roommate
Sophie (Federica Mastroianni) and the very strict nameless
headmistress (Dalila Di Lazzaro; FRANKENSTEIN
'80 - 1972) takes away Jennifer's poster of her father,
saying such things aren't allowed in school, not even in her dorm
room. That night, Jennifer has a nightmare and sleepwalks out of her
dorm room and walks aimlessly outside, going in no particular
direction. She is then picked up by two German students, who try to
rape her in their car, but she manages to jump out of the moving car
and rolls down an embankment into the forest.
Jennifer then wakes up, but she has no idea where she is. Inga then
appears, takes Jennifer's hand and leads her to the Professor's
house. The Professor notices that Jennifer has a strange effect on
insects (all of his insects, which he keeps in glass cages, begin to
buzz and make other noises very loudly), especially when a
"spitting beetle" begins secreting a sweet smelling liquid
when Jennifer holds it, meaning that it wants to mate with her. Since
it is nowhere near the beetle's mating season, the Professor knows
that Jennifer is an exceptional girl and she confesses that she has
always been able to summon insects and they always come to her rescue
when she is in trouble. The Professor tells Jennifer that many
species of insects are able to use telepathy to communicate with
other insects vast distances away and Jennifer is special because she
also has that power. He asks her why she is out so late, but Jennifer
tells him she can't remember much because she was sleepwalking and
all she can recall is that two boys tried to sexually assault her,
but she couldn't wake herself up. The Professor tells her she is
always welcome to come to his house and gives her Greta's jacket to
keep her warm, telling her that the next time she sleepwalks, she
must say to herself, "I am sleepwalking. I must wake up."
She then leaves his home and walks back to the school, where the
headmistress is pissed, telling Jennifer that no one leaves her
school at night and makes her get an EEG of her brainwaves, calling
her an epileptic (!) and if she doesn't suffer from epilepsy, she
must be crazy! Jennifer has had enough of the headmistress' bullshit
and rips the electrodes off her head and storms out of the room,
making Sophie promise to watch her at night so she doesn't sleepwalk.
That night, instead of watching Jennifer, Sophie meets her boyfriend
on the school grounds. When her boyfriend leaves, Sophie is attacked
and murdered by the serial killer, who uses a long metal pole with a
sharp blade on one end to impale Sophie in the back of her skull, the
blade exiting out of her mouth. Jennifer hears Sophie's screams and
goes outside, where a single firefly leads her to a woolen glove
hanging from a tree branch. Jennifer then goes back to her room and
screams, waking up the rest of the school. The schoolgirls are
relentless in their mocking of Jennifer, especially when one girl
steals a letter Jennifer wrote to her father, explaining her power
over insects, which she reads to the headmistress (she calls Jennifer
"crazy" and a Devil worshipper, saying the name
"Beelzebub" is Latin for "Lord of the Flies",
referring to Jennifer as "Lady of the Flies"! This
headmistress is a piece of work.). The students taunt Jennifer
relentlessly, saying over and over, "Call to your insects! We
worship you!" Suddenly, all the windows in the school are coated
with winged insects, so thick that it turns the inside of the school
pitch black, scaring both students and teachers alike. Then they
just as suddenly disappear in a large swarm that blocks the sun in
the sky. Jennifer then gives the woolen glove to the Professor, the
only person she now trusts. The inside of the glove contains maggots
and larvae of the "Master Sarcophagous Fly", an insect that
only appears on dead flesh. Now fully understanding Jennifer's power
with insects, the Professor comes up with the idea of pairing
Jennifer with a Sarcophagous fly, the fly leading her to the location
where the serial killer lives, the Professor believing that the
killer keeps the rotting corpses of the victims close by (so he can
"play" with them), hence the appearance of the larvae
inside the glove. The Professor also believes that the killer lives
within a fifty-two kilometer area, since the first victim (the Danish
student) and every one after that were on the same route as the tour bus.
That night, while Inga is outside taking her nightly stroll, the
door to the Professor's house slams shut and locks, leaving Inga
outside with no way to get in. Knowing that the Professor's life is
in danger, Inga starts screaming and begins tearing away the wooden
slats covering one of the windows. The Professor hears the commotion
and, thinking that Inga has locked herself out, he puts himself and
his wheelchair on the electric stair climber and heads downstairs,
only when he gets to the bottom, the killer stabs him in the stomach
with the spear-like metal pole, killing him. Inga witnesses the whole
thing and lets out a heart-breaking yelp (For those that don't
believe man evolved from the apes, I suggest that you watch this
scene. It will change your mind.). Inga then aimlessly walks through
the forest and hunger forces her to forage through garbage cans,
where she finds a straight razor...
Jennifer,
who has left the school for good, vowing to never go back, hops on
the tour bus with a single Sarcophagous fly in a glass cage and
watches it closely as the bus travels its 52 kilometer route. The fly
starts buzzing loudly at one location and she makes the driver stop
the bus so she can get off, not noticing that the bus was being
followed by a car as soon as Jennifer stepped on the bus and became a
passenger. Jennifer lets the fly out of the cage and follows it, the
car silently following Jennifer. The fly leads Jennifer to the house
the Dutch girl found in the beginning of the film. Jennifer find the
room where the killer was chained-up, but before she can discover
anything else, a real estate broker comes into the house and wants to
know why she is there because no one has live in the house for eight
months. Jennifer leaves the house and we then discover that the car
following her was being driven by Police Inspector Geiger, who
questions the broker, wanting to know who lived in the house
previously (information the audience is not privy to). Jennifer, who
has no money and no place to stay, phones her father's agent, Morris
Shapiro (Mario Donatone; THE
CROSS OF SEVEN JEWELS - 1987), and begs him to wire her some
money. He tells her what bank to go to to pick up the money and she
goes there, the bank teller saying that no transfer in her name has
arrived yet. Jennifer waits for hours for the money to arrive, only
to have Frau Bruckner show up, saying that Morris Shapiro phoned her
saying that there's a plane ticket for Jennifer that will take her
back to the United States, but it doesn't leave until tomorrow
morning. Until then she should stay with Frau Bruckner at her house.
Jennifer agrees and Frau Bruckner drives Jennifer to her home, which
surprises Jennifer because her house is so huge. She asks Frau
Bruckner how long she has lived in the house and she replies eight
months (uh, oh!). Once in the house, Jennifer notices that all of the
mirrors are covered with sheets, Frau Bruckner telling her that her
nameless son suffers from Patau Syndrome (a real malady that causes
severe deformation of the face) and he can't stand looking at
himself. Jennifer uses the bathroom to wash up and discovers that the
soap and towels are covered in Sarcophagous fly larvae and quickly
puts two and two together. She tries to phone the police, but Frau
Bruckner hits Jennifer on the back of her head with a blunt object,
rips the phone cord out of the wall and places the phone in the next
room. When Frau Bruckner sees the Inspector's car pull into the
driveway, she knocks out Jennifer to stop her from yelling for help,
flicks a switch on the wall which drops heavy sheets of metal on all
the windows, making the room inescapable and locks the door behind
her. Jennifer wakes up when she hears an ear-piercing scream and
tries to escape the room, but fails. Knowing that the phone is in an
adjoining room, Jennifer crawls through a window above the door,
plugs the phone in and makes a call to the police, but another scream
causes her to drop the phone, which falls through a hole in the floor
(that is covered in Sarcophagous fly larvae). Rather than pulling the
phone up by the cord, Jennifer crawls into the hole (I told you that
people do stupid things in this film, didn't I?) to retrieve the
phone, but she ends up falling into a pit filled with the remains of
decaying bodies, which can best be described as a pool of putrefied
flesh stew (which will give your gag reflex a good workout!). Next to
the pit is Inspector Geiger, who is chained to a wall. As Jennifer
escapes the pit of rotting body parts, Frau Bruckner appears and
tries to kill her, but Inspector Geiger (who we saw break his thumb
to escape his shackles) grabs Frau Bruckner. Jennifer escapes and
runs into a room where a young boy is sitting in a corner, telling
Jennifer to go away, as she doesn't belong here. Jennifer tries to
comfort the boy (once again doing something very stupid), but when he
turns around, she discovers he has the face of a monster. Yes, it is
Frau Bruckner's son and he tries to kill Jennifer, but she escapes
into a tunnel that leads outside to a dock by a lake. Jennifer
quickly hops in a motorboat, but she is not quick enough, because the
monstrous boy jumps into the boat with his spear-like weapon and
tries to kill Jennifer with it but misses, piercing a plastic
container of gasoline. Suddenly, a swarm of insects cover the boy,
eating away the flesh on his grotesque face and he falls into the
lake (Don't fuck with a girl who can summon insects!). Jennifer
starts the boat's motor, only for it to ignite the gasoline, turning
the boat and the water around it into a fiery inferno. Jennifer jumps
into the lake and holds her breath, swimming away from the
gasoline-soaked water, only the boy is not quite dead yet. He grabs
Jennifer and a struggle ensues, where the boy surfaces and burns to
death. Jennifer swims to shore and believes her ordeal is over.
Morris Shapiro appears, telling Jennifer that he flew to Switzerland
to personally accompany her home, but he doesn't get the chance. A
piece of sheet metal, swung by Frau Bruckner, decapitates Morris
(Quite shocking, one of the best jump scares I have ever seen on
film). Frau Bruckner then holds the piece of sheet metal to
Jennifer's throat, telling her that she killed Sophie and the
Professor to "protect" her son, also telling Jennifer that
she is about to die, so she should call her insect friends one last
time, only they will not be able to protect her, they will see her
die. Inga then appears, slashing Frau Bruckner about her face and
throat with the straight razor, killing her in retribution for
murdering her beloved Professor. The nightmare is finally over.
If you can look past people doing the most insane things at the most
inopportune times (such as Jennifer crawling into a maggot-infested
hole to retrieve the phone, when all she had to do is pull the phone
up by the cord) and the headache-inducing heavy metal music playing
during scenes that run contrary to the music being played (Hey, I
have nothing against heavy metal, but it is only in this film to
attract a certain audience, not to
advance the plot or set a mood, you may find yourself enjoying this
film. Be aware that the 82-minute version, titled CREEPERS
(released by New Line Cinema to theaters
and on VHS from Media
Home Entertainment), is an abomination, missing over 30 minutes
of footage, and excises some important exposition that is needed to
make sense of the story. It also edits some of the more graphic
violence so we don't see the "money shot" on any of the
murders. Even the Anchor Bay DVD,
which runs 110 minutes, is missing a few key scenes, including the
Danish girl being impaled in the hand with scissors, Sophie being
stabbed in the back of her head with the blade exiting out of her
mouth and Inspector Geiger breaking his thumb to escape his
handcuffs. Thankfully, the Synapse Films Blu-Ray
and the streaming version on Amazon Prime (free to Prime members)
offer the full 116-minute version, which is the way this film should
be viewed (Arrow Films also issued a four-disc "Limited
Edition" Blu-Ray
of this title, but it is way too expensive for the likes of me.).
This is purportedly Dario Argento's favorite film of his oeuvre,
since it contains many aspects from his own personal history,
especially the story Jennifer tells Sophie about her mother (missing
from most prints), which actually happened to Argento. This film also
contains many of Argento's patented flourishes, including the
aforementioned single-take Steadicam tracking footage, death by glass
and other strange sights, done with a sense of imagination and
professionalism as only Argento can deliver. I am really glad I
decided to revisit this film, because it gave me the impetus to
explore Argento's other films, from the beginning of his directorial
career (THE BIRD WITH
THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE - 1970), right up to his most recent
film, DRACULA 3D (2012; at
the time of this review). I will sporadically be posting reviews of
most of his films, as I am finding myself discovering something new
every time I re-watch them. Argento is one of the few directors from
the Golden Age of Italian genre Cinema still working today. There's a
reason for that, as even his most recent films, while not
masterpieces, show a certain brilliance missing from most films
today. Luigi Cozzi (director of THE
KILLER MUST KILL AGAIN - 1975; STARCRASH
- 1978; and the gory CONTAMINATION
- 1980) handled the insect swarming visual effects and Michele Soavi
was First Assistant Director. Also featuring Fulvio Mingozzi
(Argento's DEEP RED - 1975),
Fiorenza Tessari, Fiore Argento (Argento's THE
CARD PLAYER - 2004), Alberto Cracco and David Marotta (DEMONS
2 - 1986) as Frau Bruckner's deformed son. The edited
theatrical cut was Rated R, while the uncut version is Not Rated.
SAMURAI
COP
(1989/1991) -
Oh...my...God! If you thought Iranian director/scripter Amir
Shervan's HOLLYWOOD COP
(1986) and KILLING AMERICAN STYLE
(1988, but not released until 2014!) were brain-damaged
entertainment, wait until you get a gander at this, an even more
mentally-challenged actioner that contains plentiful nudity,
violence, gore and, most of all, some of the most anemically-staged
action sequences ever committed to celluloid. Toss in one of the most
unbelievable, pretty-boy leading men in film history and what you
have is a total package of ineptitude. Matt Hannon (real name: Mathew
Karedas) stars as Detective Joe Marshall, a cop in L.A. (on loan from
San Diego) who speaks fluent Japanese (although we never hear him
speak a single word of it) and was
somehow trained in the way of the Samurai (as a matter of fact,
"Samurai" is his nickname). Joe (who has hair down to his
shoulders, is irresistible to most women and has the emotional range
of a cucumber, like some mutant Fabio) teams up with L.A. detective
Frank (Mark Frazer) to bring down Japanese drug kingpin Fujiyama
(Joselito Rescober; and, yes, you read that correctly, a Spanish
actor playing a Japanese!). After catching one of Fujiyama's men
after a memorable car chase (where Joe repeatedly says to Frank,
"Shoot! Shoot him!") and putting him in the hospital with
burns over 90% of his body (his van simply taps the side of a hill
and explodes!), Joe and Frank hope to get him to talk (!), but
Fujiyama sends his #1 muscle, Yamashita (Robert Z'Dar; yeah, you read
that correctly, too!) to cut the burned guy's head off so he can
"place it on his piano". Yamashita does just that, sneaking
into the hospital room while hiding in a garbage can and cutting the
guy's head off with a Katana while he lies in bed, all bloodied and
bandaged. When Police Captain Roma (Jimmy Williams) finds out, he
nearly bursts a blood vessel (He says, "I feel like somebody
stuck a big club up my ass...and it hurts! I've gotta figure out a
way to get it outta there!"), but he gives Joe and Frank one
more chance to bring Fujiyama down. That "one more chance"
includes numerous fights, by sword (where one guy gets his arm sliced
off), gun and fist; a hilarious encounter with a gay Costa Rican
waiter; an invasion on henchman's Okamura's (Gerald Okamura) house,
where Joe and Okamura have one of the most badly choreographed
martial arts fights in memory (not to mention the constantly changing
location photography); and a visit from some New York hitmen. After
various attempts on Joe and Frank's lives, they kill Fujiyama, Joe
and Yamashita have a sword and fist duel (where Yamashita commits
hari-kari for losing face) and Joe falls in love with Fujiyama's new
girlfriend, Jenny (Janis Farley). Is that a tear in your eye? Here,
let me get you a tissue. I can't begin to explain how bad this
gem truly is. I don't think there's a second in this film where one
thing goes right, whether it the acting, editing, music, action
sequences or some of the poorest post-sync dubbing and sound effects
this side of a Doris Wishman film. Matt Hannon (who was once a
bodyguard for Sylvester Stallone) is so stiff and wooden as the
long-haired American Samurai, I was waiting for my TV set to start
spitting out splinters. Mark Frazer, as his black partner Frank, must
have studied acting from the Steppin Fetchit school of emoting, as
all he does is stare
bug-eyed
into the camera in a series of reaction shots or talk about his
"black ass" or how big his dick is. He sets back the cause
of African American acting (not to mention Civil Rights) by at least
fifty years. Robert Z'Dar (MANIAC COP
- 1988; EVIL ALTAR -
1989) covers-up his extraordinary big chin with a beard and proves
how mean he is by pouring a frying pan-full of bacon grease onto the
legs of nymphomaniac cop Peggy (Melissa Moore of VAMPIRE
COP [1990]) to get her to talk. Otherwise, his expression
never changes throughout the entire film. Director Shervan (who, at
one time, owned the majority of movie theaters in Iran) manages to
throw in as much nudity as possible (always a good thing), but the
entire film looks like it was shot and edited by someone with a
severe case of ADD, as it jumps from one scene to the next with no
establishing shots or connecting structure and contains gunfights
where it's plain to see that the weapons are nothing more than cap
pistols (in some scenes, you can actually hear the clicks of the
pistols where they forgot to overdub the sounds of actual gunfire)
and some of the most unbelievable dialogue I have ever heard. The
Police Captain gets the best lines, including where he incredulously
tells Joe and Frank to "kill everyone" and "make sure
it's a bloodbath" in the film's finale or the scene where he
tells Fujiyama's lawyer (who simply says to him, "I'll see you
in court!"), "You motherfucker! I'll see you in Hell! Leave
me alone! Get a job!" Wow. Who knew being a lawyer wasn't a job?
There's also a surreal scene between Joe and a hospital nurse that
must be heard and seen to be believed. I can't recommend this film
highly enough for all badfilm lovers. It's the best anti-action
action film you will ever see. Filmed in Los Angeles in 1989, but not
released until 1991. Joe Bob Briggs does his usual hilarious, biting
commentary on this film's DVD release from Media Blasters. The DVD
also contains a funny interview with co-star Robert Z'Dar (If his jaw
gets any bigger, it will have it's own gravitational orbit!), who
reminisces about this film, his life and his real-life romance with co-star
Krista Lane (here billed simply as "Cameron"), who he
swears ignorance to her porn star credits at the time, even though
his first filmed scene with her was a nude lovemaking bit in a bed
(which had to be reshot, after a bottle of wine, because she was too
"stiff"!). Great stuff. Unbelievably, followed by a sequel
in 2015, SAMURAI
COP 2: DEADLY VEANGENCE, starring Mathew Kareda, Mark Frazer
and Melissa Moore in their original roles. Amir Shervan passed away
in 2006, so it was directed by Gregory Hatanaka. A Media
Blasters/Guilty Pleasures Release. Now available separately on DVD
& Blu-Ray from Cinema Epoch.
Not Rated.
SATAN'S
SLAVE (1976) - For years, this
Crown International film has been floating around on stand-alone VHS
& DVD compilations in a cut 86-minute R-Rated version, even in
U.S. theaters. I was never keen on the film because it seemed like
something was missing and I never really could pinpoint one character
in the film (turns out it was two characters; I'll explain in the
review) and why he did the things he did. Now, thanks to Walter Olsen
and Scorpion Releasing, we have a completely uncut version of the
film on widescreen anamorphic DVD with three minutes of excised
footage restored and it makes it seem like a different film. A better
film. Not only does the three minutes restore some nasty bits,
full-frontal female nudity (and lots of it!) and extend the gore
briefly shown shown in the R-Rated version and give us a previously
unseen death of a character, almost from the beginning it shows some
exposition about the character I was talking about. It gives us the
motivations of a sociopath. And since Norman J. Warren was the
director and David McGillivray the screenwriter (they worked together
again on the so-so TERROR
- 1978), you know the film will be interesting in this incarnation
(McGillvray is better known for writing the screenplays to the films
of director Pete Walker, such as FRIGHTMARE
- 1974; HOUSE OF WHIPCORD
- 1974; THE CONFESSIONAL
- 1975; and SCHIZO - 1976, which
were nearly all nasty indictments of the Catholic Church or the
British penal system disguised as horror films). The film begins with
a robed and goat mask-wearing Alexander Yorke (the unmistakenable
voice of Michael Gough; HORROR HOSPITAL
- 1973) and his group of hooded followers performing a Satanic mass,
where Alexander leads a young woman (which we later find out was his
wife) on to an altar and strips her naked (full-frontal nudity within
the first three minutes; whats not to love?). He calls her a
"vessel of reversal", as the naked woman writhes in
pleasure and pain, with Alexander hoping some female spirit named
Camilla will enter his body because she was once a powerful witch. He
hopes this female sacrifice will be enough to entice her to enter his
body, so he will have all her powers, including immortality. The
woman sits up and screams and we are suddenly at a dinner with
Stephen Yorke (Martin Potter; GOODBYE
GEMINI - 1970) and some unnamed young woman (played by Paula
Patterson). The young lady gets sleepy (Could Stephen have drugged
the wine?) and uses Stephen's bed to lay down, only to find Stephen
standing over her and putting a pillow over her face, knocking her
out. He then gags her, ties her hands behind her back and begins to
rape her, when he notices scissors on the night table. He picks them
up, cuts off her clothes and runs the scissors over her completely
naked body (there is a long scene of female pubic hair in this
scene), stopping the scissors at certain parts of her body (Will her
cut off one of her nipples? Will he shove the scissors up her
vagina?), before she breaks loose, running out of the room and
calling Stephen an "animal". Stephen just lays on the bed
and laughs. The young woman tries to find a way to leave the mansion,
but Stephen slams a door against her head a few times, forcing blood
to come out of her ears and mouth. He finishes her off by stabbing
her repeatedly in the torso with a large knife and begins dragging
her body away on a rug, when a woman comes through the front door and
sees what he is doing (Only a fragment of this sequence exists on the
R-Rated version, the scissors sequence is completely missing and it
gives us a much better psychological profile of Stephen in the uncut
version.). We then switch to Catherine Yorke (Candace Glendenning; TOWER
OF EVIL [a.k.a. HORROR
ON SNAPE ISLAND; BEYOND
THE FOG - 1972]) and her boyfriend John (Michael Craze; MADHOUSE
- 1974) in bed. Catherine is rapidly approaching her 20th birthday
and she is going to spend it with her parents at her Uncle
Alexander's mansion for a week. She is also prone to premonitions and
feels that she needs to do this for some reason she cannot explain.
Before she leaves, John gives her an expensive silver bracelet that
once belonged to his mother as an early birthday present, since he
was not invited to go on the journey with her (it's family only).
Catherine and her parents make the 60-mile trip to Alexander's
mansion out somewhere in a secluded part of the country. As
Catherine's father is driving down the long driveway that leads to
Alexander's mansion, he hears a god-awful noise which makes him slam
the car against a tree. Catherine's mother is knocked unconscious, so
her father says he will stay with her while Catherine runs to the
mansion to call for an ambulance. Suddenly, for seemingly no reason,
the car bursts into flames and explodes, killing Catherine's parents.
As you can guess, Catherine is an emotional mess, but we know that
Uncle Alexander and Stephen have her just where they want her.
Alexander's secretary, Frances (Barbara Kellerman; THE
MONSTER CLUB - 1980), who loves Stephen even though she
knows he is a sociopath (she was the woman that walked through the
door when Stephen was moving his first victim away), puts Catherine
to bed (after Alexander gives her some "sleeping pills")
and takes care of her needs. She wakes up the next morning and
Stephen takes her on the tour of the grounds and Catherine learns
that Stephen lost his mother when she was just 29 years-old. She also
notices that her parents' car is missing ("The police took
it." is Stephen's reply). Stephen says that he and his father
talked a lot about Catherine when they lived in Africa (if Africa has
any meaning in this film, it is lost on me). Catherine has a
premonition (it's actually a premonition flashback and flashforward)
where three Puritans tie a totally naked Camilla Yorke to a tree,
brand her a couple of times with a cross, whip her back until it is
bloody and raw and then Catherine sees herself being burned alive
like a witch (much of this scene is missing from the R-Rated cut).
When she comes out of her state, Stephen is nowhere to be found.
Catherine gets back to the mansion and sees Stephen reading on a
couch. When she asks him where he went, all he tells her are lies.
Catherine tells Uncle Alexander that she doesn't trust Stephen at all
and Alexander says Catherine is a wise young woman. He has been
cleaning Stephen's messes up since he was a child. Alexander insists
that Catherine's parents be buried at a small gathering at the family
cemetery on the mansion's grounds (In an ironic in-joke, David
McGillivray cameos as a priest). When everyone leaves, Catherine is
drawn to a headstone buried in the thicket with the name "Camilla
Yorke" chiseled on it. While Catherine is asleep that night,
someone dressed in black, including black gloves, sneaks into her
bedroom (giving this sequence a giallo feel) and steals the silver
bracelet that John gave her as an early 20th birthday present.
Frances can't stand that Stephen has pushed her aside for Catherine,
so she sneaks into Alexander's study and unlocks a drawer to his
desk, stealing some important papers which we don't know what they
contain. Yet. John has not heard from Catherine in a few days and her
birthday is tomorrow, so he leaves his apartment and gets into the
elevator (probably to drive to Alexander's mansion), when he hears
that god-awful noise that Catherine's father heard before he crashed
the car (We can hear the name "Asmodeus" mentioned among
the noise. Asmodeus is constantly associated as being the Devil, but
it is actually one of the Seven Princes of Hell. He is the Prince of
Lust.). John non-chalantly takes the elevator to the roof of the
building and walks off it, the results being John's body torn to a
bloody pulp when he hits the pavement (This is the second character I
was talking about. In the R-Rated cut, we see John in the beginning
and then he just disappears. His death is certainly a gory shocker in
the Uncut version and is the first time in the U.S. that we see him
die.). Alexander keeps on giving Catherine "sleeping pills"
and this time she has a dream of laying on an altar completely naked,
while another woman draws a pentagram on her chest using a dagger and
human blood. Stephen kisses her naked body, she has blood and snakes
thrown on her body (Miss Clendenning insisted on a body double with
the snake scene, but the rest of the sequence is all her) while a
group of hooded Satanists watch the action. She awakens from the
nightmare
(or was it a premonition?) before she can be killed on the altar.
But what could all of this mean? I believe I have given you all the
clues you need to figure it out (there's also a betrayal by someone
very close to Catherine). Why are there no police questioning
Catherine? What are in the papers that Frances took and what happens
to her when Stephen finds out? Does Catherine escape or is she
sacrificed since it is her 20th birthday today? Since this comes from
the 70's, it could go either way. The extra three minutes add
greatly to the enjoyment of the film. I never liked the R-Rated
version, but this Unrated version gives us characterization, gore
(some of it really nasty, especially Stephen's extended eye-gouging
demise and John's death) and plenty of full-frontal nudity (I haven't
seen so much bush except in a porn film, some of it shot in extreme
close-up, especially in Stephen's scissor scene) not only makes the
film highly watchable, but is also integral in enjoying the film as
pure horror with plenty of surprises. The film now seems whole,
rather than leaving you asking questions where you get no answers.
Speaking of the scissors scene in the beginning of the film: It
finally shows us what type of psychopath Stephen really is, rather
than just implying it throughout the rest of the film in the R-Rated
cut. We also find out what happens to John, which was also a nagging
question. The amount of female nudity in this cut is staggering and
no body part is missing by the camera's lens. Director Norman J.
Warren could run hot (ALIEN PREY
- 1978; HORROR PLANET
[a.k.a. INSEMINOID - 1980]; BLOODY
NEW YEAR - 1986) and cold (SPACED
OUT - 1979) and this film use to be in my cold pile, but in
this new Uncut version, it will definitely get repeat viewings from
me. It's amazing what a little restored footage can do to vastly
improve a film. Let me just say that I now consider this one of
Norman J. Warren's best films. It was available on VHS in it's
R-Rated edition by various bootleg companies (I can't find one
legitimate VHS release in the United States), but there are many DVD
incarnations, including a double
feature DVD (with the previously mentioned TERROR)
by the defunct Deimos Entertainment (the line was taken over by Code
Red before CR went out on their own) and DVD compilations such
as Rhino Video's HORRIBLE
HORRORS COLLECTION VOLUME 1 and the GOREHOUSE
GREATS 12 movie compilation from Mill Creek Entertainment,
both of which were all films released by Crown International Pictures
to movie theaters. If you want to see the Uncut version, though, you
can only see it on this DVD, which comes with a plethora of extras,
including deleted scenes, old and new featurettes and FRAGMENTS
(1965), the first short film directed by Warren. Also known as EVIL
HERITAGE (the name of the shooting script), but changed to the
more exploitative title. Apparently, it was released somewhere under
the shooting title, but I'll be damned if I could find any material
backing it up. Also starring James Bree, Gloria Walker, Celia Hewitt,
Moira Young as Alexander's wife (also an Associate Producer), Monika
Ringwald as Camilla Yorke, and Robert Conway, Nick Maley &
Richard Crafter (one of this film's Producers) as the three Puritans.
A Scorpion Releasing
DVD Release. Not Rated. UPDATE:
The uncut version is now available on Blu-Ray
from Vinegar Syndrome.
A
SAVAGE HUNGER
(1984) -
An (offscreen) plane crash leaves a diverse group of people stranded
in the desert. They are your typical cast of stereotypes: Young,
naive Matt (Chris Makepeace; MEATBALLS
- 1979), who has just lost his father in the crash; spoiled rich
bitch Jennifer (Suzanne Snyder; RETURN
OF THE LIVING DEAD PART II - 1987), who is not used to doing
anything on her own; fitness and health food fanatics Anna (Anne
Lockhart; TROLL - 1986) and Alex
(Rick Podell; WORLD GONE WILD
- 1988), who won't even eat caviar found in the wreck because it
contains "fish byproducts"; photographer Paul (Richard Cox; ZOMBIE
HIGH - 1987), whose camera is an extension of his arm;
co-pilot Eric (Mark Metcalf; ANIMAL
HOUSE - 1978), who has suffered brain injuries; regular joe
Louis (Ben Slack; SOCIETY
- 1989), a nice guy in an awful situation; brave middle-aged New
Yorker Jill (Dori Brenner; ALTERED
STATES - 1980); and physician Jake (Scott Hylands; DEATH
HUNT - 1981), who becomes the unofficial leader of the
group. After realizing that no one in the outside world knows where
they are and with food and water getting scarce, Jake, Alex, Matt,
Paul and Jill leave the rest of the group back at the wreckage and
head-off in search of civilization and rescue, not aware that the
directions given them by Eric are completely wrong. When Anna
discovers that Eric is a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic, she
and the remainder of the group head out to catch up with Jake and his
gang and put them in the right direction. They do catch up, but a
lack of water puts them all in a weakened state. Louis is the first
to fall victim. Too weak to walk, the
group are forced to leave him behind as they move forward (Paul takes
one last picture of him, but a disgusted Jill breaks his camera).
Eric takes his life the next day by swallowing a handful of sand,
imagining it to be water. The remaining seven survivors trek on
through the blazing sun and hot sand, all of them moments away from
dying of dehydration and heat stroke (Alex gets so thirsty, he drinks
his own urine). Anna and Alex steal the last bit of water and
break-off from the rest of the group, selfishly heading out on their
own. Too bad for them, because the rest of the group find a man-made
mini oasis, complete with a well full of water. They have two major
problems, though. The first one is that though they have plenty of
water, they have nothing to carry it in, forcing them to stay at the
oasis and hoping someone finds them. The second problem is food.
Besides a couple of lizards, there is no nourishment to be had. They
are in quite the conundrum, which is further complicated by a wound
on Jill's foot that is turning gangreinous and Jake going looney from
hunger. He wants to kill Jill and cannibalize her body, but Paul
protects her until she dies and he then buries her in a secret
location. Jake goes quite mad and murders Paul while Matt and
Jennifer (who are now lovers) watch and do nothing. Jakes slices-up
Paul's body (it's a pretty graphic scene) and cooks his flesh over an
open fire. Matt refuses to eat it, but Jennifer gobbles it down and
becomes Jake's bitch. Will Matt finally cave-in and eat human flesh
or will he fight the craving and realize that when the Paul buffet
runs dry, he will be next on the menu? Man, I get the feeling that
things are going to get hot at the oasis. I remember watching
this film (also known as THE OASIS) on the CBS Late Movie in
the mid-80's, but finally seeing it on home video is like watching a
whole different film, since the sanitized TV edit deleted all the
nudity, violence and the entire cannibal subplot! Director Sparky
Greene (sadly, this is his only feature film credit) holds off on
most of the graphic violence and nudity until the final third of the
film, so when it does come, it's shocking and totally unexpected. The
scene where Jake cuts into a dead Paul's arm with a jagged piece of
metal is about as graphic as a film can get. Until then, Greene was
more interested in showing us the plight of the survivors as they
traverse the barren desert (filmed in Death Valley, California) in
search of food and shelter. Watching their suffering is an emotional
ordeal and I dare you not to reach for something to drink while
viewing this. The script (by Tom Klassen) has minimal dialogue, but
the words are chosen carefully and some lines resonate, thanks to a
cast of veteran actors. Just listen to what Louis asks of the group
before they walk off, leaving him in the hot sun to die: "Every
once in a while, just think of me, okay?" You can
actually see the pain and anguish on the other people's faces when he
gasps that out. Not a typical line of dialogue for a film like this.
I especially liked the downbeat ending, where Jennifer knocks-out
Jake when he is choking Matt. When Matt and Jennifer leave the oasis
with a full jug of water (Matt finds the jug next to the corpses of
Anna and Alex, who have been picked-clean by vultures), Matt asks
Jennifer why she picked him over Jake. When she answers, "There
was more of him!", it leaves little doubt what is in the
backpack Matt is carrying. They then spot a road and think they are
saved, throwing the water and backpack to the ground and running
towards the road, but as the camera pans overhead, it reveals that
nothing but miles of barren, empty terrain lies ahead of them. That's
just mean but, boy, does it ever pack a punch. If you can find the
VHS tape of this film from Vestron
Video, grab it, because it's not yet available on DVD and it's
worth your time. It would make a good companion piece with Rene
Cardona's SURVIVE! (1976),
which was remade as the less-exploitative ALIVE
(1993). Not Rated.
THE
SCORPION WITH TWO TAILS (1982) -
Many think this is a minor film from director Sergio Martino (THE
STRANGE VICE OF MRS. WARDH - 1971; ALL
THE COLORS OF THE DARK - 1972; TORSO
- 1973), who takes the moniker "Christian Plummer" here,
but I have to disagree. It's weird, I'll give it that, but this film
is important for several reasons, the main one being that this is his
last giallo/horror film of his illustrious career (at the time of
this review, as he is still involved in Italian genre cinema). After
this film, Martino mainly focused on action films, including the
sci-fi tinged HANDS
OF STEEL (1986),
UPPERCUT MAN (1988), CASABLANCA
EXPRESS (1989), AMERICAN
RICKSHAW
(1989) and CODE CONDOR
(1990). This film has a lot to recommend, including a large cast of
actors well versed in Italian genre cinema, some great location work
and a plot that could be politely called "out there." So
why is this film largely ignored in the United States? That's simple.
Besides one VHS release by a short-lived company and a DVD release by
a company of questionable repute, that's all we got in the States and
both of those releases are long OOP. Thanks to YouTube, I was able to
watch this film streaming on my Roku and write this review, so let's
get to it.
We watch an ancient Etruscan mass human sacrifice in a large grotto
containing a deep pit that is spewing out unknown fumes. We watch
young couples walking into the pit as priest talks Etruscan and
someone grabs their heads and turns them 180° (ouch!). It turns
out this is part of a nightmare Joan Barnard (Elvire Audray; VAMPIRE
IN VENICE - 1988) is having in her apartment in New York
City. But is it a nightmare or a vision? The next morning, she tells
scientist co-worker Mike Grant (Paolo Malco; THE
NEW YORK RIPPER - 1982) that she had another dream where
someone spoke Etruscan to her and Mike jokingly says he could think
of better things to do with her at night. Joan reminds him that she
is married to archaeologist Arthur Barnard (John Saxon; TENEBRE
- 1982) and Mike replies that she hasn't seen him in months and every
time she talks to him on the phone they get into an argument. Mike
continues to say that when Etruscan women had disagreements with
their spouses, they would get revenge by jumping in bed with the
first man they see. We then find out that Arthur has been away from
home for ten months researching Etruscan ruins in Italy, financed by
Joan's rich father, Mulligan (Van Johnson; KILLER
CROCODILE - 1989), and his foundation. Joan tells Mike that
she has been having these nightmares for quite some time and she
believes they will end when Arthur comes home. Joan then notices some
photos of ruins on Mike's desk and he tells her Arthur sent them for
him to analyze. When Joan picks up one of the photos, she sees
maggots crawling on it (thousands on 'em!). She starts screaming,
calling out Arthur's name, but when Mike touches her, the maggots
disappear. What is going on here?
We then see Arthur by a river somewhere in Italy. He sees an old man
playing a flute (Luigi Rossi), making a deadly snake retreat from
Arthur's feet. Arthur thanks the old man and discovers he is well
versed in Etruscan lore. The old man tells Arthur he has something to
show him and they walk away. At the same time, Joan is taking an
afternoon nap and has another nightmare, only this time she sees an
Etruscan woman (who could be Joan's double [as a matter of fact,
Elvire Audray portrays her]) twist Arthur's head the way no head
should ever be twisted. The phone then rings and it's Arthur, who
tells Joan he won't be home any time soon because he has made an
important discovery. He tells Joan that he is shipping some crates
back to the foundation and to tell her father that before the crates
can be shipped, he needs to send a telex (an 80's version of a fax or
email). Joan is pissed, telling Arthur she isn't doing anything until
he tells her why he isn't coming home. Arthur tells her he found an
ancient Etruscan tomb hidden in a cave in an enormous grotto and this
may be the greatest discovery in archaeological history. It's the
richest Etruscan tomb ever discovered. Joan tells Arthur that there's
a pit in the grotto that is spewing out noxious fumes and Arthur is
stunned, asking her how she knew that. "I dreamt it" says
Joan, describing the location in more detail. While she is talking on
the phone, someone sneaks up behind Arthur, grabs his head and twists
it 180°, killing him (Hey, better he's dead, because re-learning
how to take a piss will be messy!). As Joan screams out Arthur's
name, she hears someone speaking Etruscan on the other end of the
phone and then passes out. We then see Arthur dead on the floor. If
he could lift his head, he would see his ass!
A few days later, Joan is sitting in her father's office, Mulligan
telling her that either a lunatic or a burglar murdered Arthur, even
the Italian police believe that. Joan wants to go to Italy to
investigate Arthur's death herself, but her father starts
bad-mouthing Arthur, telling Joan the only reason Arthur married her
was for his foundation and money. He seems more interested in the
crates than Arthur's murder, telling Joan that he put Heather Hull
(Wandisa Guida; LIGHTNING BOLT
- 1966) in charge of the operation and she will makes sure the crates
are shipped to him. The biggest questions becomes this: Why is
Mulligan so interested in the crates and what's in them? Joan reminds
her father about the telex and he blows it off, telling his daughter
that Arthur demanded $100,000 for some tomb he found (He says this
about Arthur: "You can be a great archaeologist and still be a
fink."). He tells Joan that Heather will be back at the end of
the week and she will tell her anything she wants to know, but until
then she should go to the ranch and relax. Joan says she will do just
that...when she gets back from Italy. She's sure Heather's "field
report" will tell her nothing.
Joan flies to Italy with Mike, who insists on going with her. She
then talks to the Police Commissioner (Gianfranco Barra; Martino's THE
SUSPICIOUS DEATH OF A MINOR - 1975), who takes Joan and Mike
to the home of Contessa Maria Volumna (Marilu Tolo; CONFESSIONS
OF A POLICE CAPTAIN - 1971), who says Arthur was a guest in
her home. It's obvious that she is lying to Joan, telling her that
Arthur stayed with her for a week, he wanted to look at her library
of old and ancient books for some research. Heather then arrives and
Joan asks her for the location of the Etruscan tomb Arthur found, but
Heather says she doesn't know what Joan is talking about. When Joan
goes through Arthur's personal belongings, she finds a slip of paper
and written on it is, "There is twelve!!" (Apparently,
Arthur failed English sentence structure in school!) There is also a
receipt from a local jeweler and when she goes to the shop, the
jeweler shows her an ancient gold amulet in the shape of a scorpion
with two tails, telling her that Arthur brought it in to his shop to
turn it into a necklace (A scorpion with two tails is a symbol of
divinity in ancient Etruscan culture). The jeweler gives Joan the
necklace, telling her that Arthur said he was giving it to
"someone special" and believes it was for her. Is she
the special one?
Heather takes Joan and Mike, along with bodyguard Nick Forte
(Jacques Stany; FOUR
FLIES ON GREY VELVET - 1971), to the ruins Arthur was
supposedly examining and a stone statue of an old man playing the
flute gets Joan's undivided attention. It's obvious that these ruins
are nothing but a tourist trap, but Joan walks off on her own, as if
she were in a trance, interrupting a photographer, Gianni Andrucci
(Franco Garofalo; THE
POSSESSOR - 1975), who is taking photos of two models in
swimsuits. Joan starts seeing people from her nightmares and millions
of maggots flow out of the eyes of one ancient stone statue until
Mike, once again, snaps her out of it. Nick Forte is then found dead,
his neck snapped and his head twisted 180°. Joan tells Mike that
she saw Nick die and she is sure her "visions" are
prophecies of things to come. That night, Joan walks among the ruins
by herself and meets the old man with the flute. She asks him if he
knows who killed Arthur and he replies, "It is not easy to
understand the designs of the gods. Tomorrow you will see the
light." Why does everyone have to talk in riddles in films like
this? Why don't they just come out and tell it like it is? (That's a
rhetorical question and I already know the answer!)
Eleven crates arrive at the foundation and Mulligan is excited to
open one particular crate, which is marked. A couple of goons
(obviously bad men because they wear sunglasses at night!) open the
crate and it is full of cheap vases, not what Mulligan was expecting.
Thinking that he opened the wrong crate, Mulligan orders the goons to
open all the crates, but mob boss Masaccio (Maurizio Mattioli; A
SPECIAL COP IN ACTION - 1976) tells the goons to stop, they
were hoodwinked, giving Mulligan two weeks to make good, otherwise
he's a dead man. Since the mob is involved, it's not difficult to
figure out what was supposed to be in that crate: drugs, heroin to be
precise. Three hundred pounds of it, with a street value of seven
million dollars. When Masaccio and the goons leave, Mulligan opens
all the crates by himself, finding nothing but cheap vases with the
image of a man playing the flute on them in all the crates. How's
that for irony?
The next day, the old man takes Joan to the cave with the enormous
grotto. Joan recognizes it from her nightmares and knows where she
has to go without being told (The old man hands her an oil lamp and
says, "The light is yours!"). She finds the crate full of
heroin and figures out what "There is twelve!!" means
(there were eleven crates shipped to the foundation and this was the
twelfth one). Joan is then kidnapped by the two goons and thrown into
the back of their car. Mulligan arrives in Italy looking for the
missing crate and when Heather and Mike tell him that Joan is
missing, he doesn't seem worried and he drives to the Contessa's
house. She lies to Mulligan, telling him she was lucky to find Joan
walking alone on a dark street and hands her over to her father. Joan
calls her father a drug dealer and he doesn't deny it, telling her
sure, he has drugs shipped to his foundation in New York City, but
he's just a "link in a chain", saying if she doesn't want
to see him dead, she will show him where the twelfth crate is. Joan,
Mulligan, the Contessa and her driver go to the cave, but when they
get out of the car, someone takes a shot at them, forcing them to get
in the car and drive away. They go back to the cave at night, where
they find both Heather and the old man dead, their necks snapped the
same way as everyone else. While the pit is spewing toxic fumes, Joan
goes into one of her trances and she, her father, the Contessa and
the driver are shot by Masaccio's goons, Joan being the only
survivor. She is operated on in a hospital, where a surgeon removes a
bullet from her heart, telling Mike it is a miracle she survived.
Joan's recovery is quick and she tells the Police Commissioner that
she is not leaving Italy until she discovers the truth of what
happened to her husband and father. Another archaeologist, Paolo
Domelli (Claudio Cassinelli; Martino's SCREAMERS
- 1980) appears and tells Joan she bears a striking resemblance to a
painting in an Etruscan tomb he has discovered. When Joan goes to the
tomb and sees the painting, she knows that she is the reincarnation
of a female Etruscan goddess, who was said to be immortal. Together
with Paolo and photographer Gianni, who may have taken a photo of the
killer during his shoot at the tourist trap, Joan begins to unravel
the mystery to solve who killed her husband and everyone else. When
Mike is found dead in the twelfth crate, his head given the old 180
and the drugs missing, Joan begins to lose control, as if someone is
taking over her body and soul. What happens next is pure WTF?!?
cinema, best seen than explained, but I will tell you this: One of
the murder victims is not dead at all and another person close to
Joan is the killer. Will Joan begin to walk and see what's behind her
at the same time or will she survive this Etruscan nightmare? And
just who is snapping all of these necks and why?
If this film seems highly fragmented and lacking any bloody graphic
violence or female nudity (although a French
lobbycard shows there was some nudity in this film), it was
because this was originally filmed as a three hour TV miniseries
titled IL MISTERIO DEGLI ETRUSCHI ("The Mystery Of The
Etruscans"), but it was scrapped and never aired. It was edited
down to 97 minutes, which explains some of the jumps in narrative
logic (such as Joan's extremely quick recovery in the hospital) and
why John Saxon is in it for no longer than five minutes (his role was
much larger in the TV version). That's not to say that this version
is a waste of time, because it's not. Sergio Martino's long-time
cinematographer, Giancarlo Ferrando (Martino's YOUR
VICE IS A LOCKED ROOM AND ONLY I HAVE THE KEY - 1972 and THE
VIOLENT PROFESSIONALS - 1973), does a great job giving the
grotto and pit a sense of dread and the many neck snappings are still
hard to watch, even though they are bloodless (although, I must say,
one such victim of a neck snapping walking on both feet during the
finale of the film did bring a smile to my face). Since Martino is
the director, you know you can count on him delivering a film full of
atmospheric sequences, especially Joan's nightmares, which are
brimming with otherworldly charm and multiple neck snappings. Van
Johnson, a great actor from the "Hollywood System" of the
'40s & '50s, adds a touch of class in his role as a rich
drug-running father, making me understand why he was used numerous
times in Italian genre films from the '60s to the '90s (THE
PRICE OF POWER - 1969; THE
EYE OF THE SPIDER - 1971; FROM
CORLEONE TO BROOKLYN - 1978; CONCORDE
AFFAIR '79 - 1979; FLIGHT
FROM PARADISE - 1990; DELTA
FORCE COMMANDO 2 - 1990) until his death in 2008. It helps
offset Elvire Audray's role as Joan, who is simply terrible here,
appearing like she is reading her lines off cue cards or looking like
a deer in the headlights when she is supposed to be frightened or
displaying any emotion. She does bring the film down a peg or two. If
parts of Fabio Frizzi's music
score sounds familiar, it's because some of it was
"borrowed" from his scores to Lucio Fulci's CITY
OF THE LIVING
DEAD (1980) and THE BEYOND
(1981). The screenplay, written by longtime Martino stalwart Ernesto
Gastaldi (Martino's GAMBLING
CITY - 1975; THE
GREAT ALLIGATOR - 1979; and AFTER
THE FALL OF NEW YORK - 1983), with an assist from French
producer Jacques Leitienne (RATS:
NIGHT OF TERROR - 1983) and Gastaldi's wife, Mara Maryl (LIBIDO
- 1965), with a story by Gastaldi and Dardano Sacchetti (THE
CAT O' NINE TAILS - 1970; THE
PSYCHIC - 1977), helps explain all the giallo elements in
this film, even though it plays like a horror film. While this isn't
prime Martino, it is still and enjoyable and offbeat way to spend 97
minutes of your time. The final 30 minutes are especially memorable.
It's like living in a waking fever dream, where up is down, black is
white and God is the Devil. Maybe its nightmarish feel is because of
the condensed narrative, but whatever it is, it works. The film ends
with a skyline view of New York City, where the Twin Towers are
framed in the center, a reminder that they are no longer there and
that this was a simpler time in our history.
Also known as ASSASSINIO
AL CIMITERO ETRUSCO ("Murder In An Etruscan
Cemetery"), this film got a limited
VHS release in the United States in 1988 by short-lived company
Palisades Entertainment, followed by a widescreen
DVD in 2009 by Mya Communications, a company of questionable
reputation (both are long OOP and command big bucks in collectors
circles). The DVD also contains about twenty minutes of scenes
from the TV version as an extra, which helps expand on some of the
film's head-scratching scenes, fleshing out John Saxon's character
and expanding on Heather Hull's, explaining why she went into the
cave in motorcycle gear and called out Masaccio's name before she had
her neck snapped. There have been no upgrades to the DVD in the U.S.
since then, but I caught it streaming on YouTube from user
"Dannyaines", who offers a nice looking anamorphic
widescreen print dubbed in English (Van Johnson, Marilu Tolo and
Claudio Cassinelli dub their own voices on the English track. The
rest are dubbed by legends such as Nick Alexander, Carolyn DeFonesca
and others). I hope Arrow Video or some other enterprising company
decides to release the complete miniseries on Blu-Ray, if it is even
exists. I would gladly buy it in a second. Also featuring Nazzareno
Cardinali (MIAMI HORROR
- 1985), Antonio Maimone (TERROR
EXPRESS - 1979), Fulvio Mingozzi (INFERNO
- 1980), Mario Novelli (SYNDICATE
SADISTS - 1975), Mario Cecchi (PHENOMENAL
AND THE TREASURE OF TUTANKAMEN - 1968) and Angela Doria (ESCAPE
FROM WOMEN'S PRISON - 1978). NOTE:
Giovanni Lombardo Radice (a.k.a. "John Morghen"; HOUSE
ON THE EDGE OF THE PARK - 1979; CANNIBAL
FERROX - 1981) had a rather large role in the scrapped TV
version, but doesn't appear in this version, even though the Italian
"fotobustas" (colorful rectangular posters that show photos
from the film) proudly display
his image. Not Rated. I do have one question: Why does
Gianni Andrucci have a Confederate flag in his home? Is it a status
symbol or does it have some other meaning? I only ask because I have
seen the flag in quite a few Italian genre films.
THE
SECRET OF DORIAN GRAY (1970) -
This was the first R-Rated film I saw in a theater as a pre-teen,
thanks to the Colonial Theater in Pompton Lakes, NJ. It was walking
distance from my house and I saw every film they showed during the
late-'60s - early-'70s because I became good friends with the
manager. No matter the rating (I saw the X-Rated versions of ANDY
WARHOL'S FRANKENSTEIN & DRACULA
[both 1973] there), he would let me in. It was great being able to
walk to a movie
theater, pay fifty cents to get in and see all kinds of movies, not
just horror. Wiping all nostalgia aside and not realizing at such a
young age that I was watching a heavily edited version of the film (a
common practice by American International Pictures [A.I.P.], who
distributed this film in the United States), let's get on with the
review of the uncensored version.
Based on Oscar Wilde's novel "The Picture Of Dorian Gray",
the film opens with Dorian Gray (Helmut Berger; THE
BLOODSTAINED BUTTERFLY - 1971) complaining to some unseen
elderly man that the "portrait" is the cause of all his
troubles. We then see him washing blood off his hands and then
covering up a painting in his attic (in an effective unedited
sequence where he walks through his home). Dorian is a troubled young
man who stares into his fireplace while stroking his black cat. We
then travel back in time to discover why he is so troubled. It starts
in 1920s London, where Dorian is the audience of a nightclub with
friends Basil (Richard Todd; ASYLUM
- 1972) and Alan (Renato Romano; FRANKENSTEIN
'80 - 1972), watching a transvestite dance on stage. Dorian
is looking for an act to perform at his rich Aunt's newly renovated
retirement home. He and his friends agree that this isn't the act and
leave. They part ways after leaving the nightclub and Dorian drives
home worrying about finding an act worthy enough to please his Aunt.
He sees a theater where "Romeo And Juliet" is being
rehearsed and stops the car, goes inside and watches Sybil Vane
(Marie Liljedahl; ANN AND EVE
- 1970) rehearsing the role of Juliet. When their eyes meet, it's
love at first sight (for the both of them). They have a wonderful and
loving relationship. While making love, Dorian is surprised to
discover that Sybil is a virgin and he is happy that she gave up her
virginity to him.
Dorian tells Basil about Sybil and he tells Dorian that she must be
someone special, as he paints Dorian's portrait. Basil's paintings
are admired by the wealthy Henry Wotton (Herbert Lom; THE
SECT - 1991) and his sister Gwendolyn (Margaret Lee; SLAUGHTER
HOTEL - 1971), especially Dorian's portrait. While Gwendolyn
lustfully watches Dorian taking a shower outside, Basil tells Henry
that Dorian's portrait is not for sale as it is not yet finished.
Basil introduces them to Dorian and mentions that he is about to get
married (Henry says, "What is vice anyway? Simply pleasure
without shame."). This doesn't phase Gwendolyn, who we can see
has the hots for Dorian. Sybil lives with her brother James (Stewart
Black) and their mother and James doesn't have a high opinion of
Dorian, who picks her up and drives her to his parents dilapidated
country cottage. He shows her the bed and Sybil accuses him of
bringing other girls to the cottage and runs away. Dorian denies it
and runs after her and they then make love under a beautiful tree.
Dorian is than at his rich Aunt's retirement home with friend Alan,
when Henry shows up and quizzes him about Sybil and then says one day
he will be old and wrinkled, beautiful no more (Henry says,
"Beauty lasts a very, very short time."). Basil finishes
Dorian's portrait, where Dorian asks, "Why should I get old,
while this stays young? Why can't it be the other way around?"
Henry hears Dorian say he would give up his soul to make that happen
and buys the portrait as a present for Dorian. From that point on,
Dorian is a different person and it is not for the better. A man with
no soul can never be a real man.
Dorian becomes obsessed with his portrait and Sybil becomes jealous,
asking Dorian if he would leave her when she becomes old. The old
Dorian would have said no, by the soulless Dorian, who is obsessed
with youth, has a totally different answer. Dorian cheats on Sybil
with Gwendolyn at a party the very next day. He then goes to the
theater with rich (and horny) old lady Mrs. Ruxton (Isa Miranda; A
BAY OF BLOOD - 1971) to watch Sybil in the play, only to
discover she is a lousy actress, seemingly blowing her lines on
purpose as a way to make Dorian mad. Sybil then commits suicide after
losing Dorian and it doesn't bother him one bit. As the years pass
away, Dorian remains young while his portrait bears the wrinkles of
time, getting uglier as the passage of time progresses. Dorian begins
to live the life of a rich, spoiled playboy, who uses sex as a way to
climb the ladder of success. But at what price? We are also let in on
who Dorian was talking to in the beginning of the film and why he had
to wash blood off his hands. The film ends with a final quotation
from Oscar Wilde's novel, telling us that immortality is not as great
as you hope it will be.
Filmed many times, including a silent version made in 1910 and the
best known one in 1945 (as THE
PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY, starring Hurd Hatfield as Dorian),
it is this version that is the most faithful to Oscar Wilde's (who
was openly gay) novel. It is also the most sexually charged version,
which leaves little to the imagination. Director/co-screenwriter
Massimo Dallamano (WHAT
HAVE YOU DONE TO SOLANGE? - 1972; THE
NIGHT CHILD - 1975) has crafted an exquisite portrait
(pardon the pun) of a man obsessed with age and how he uses his never-ending
youth and beauty to his advantage until it consumes him. While his
friends and family grow old and die around him (Dorian even resorts
to murder), Dorian is determined to understand how to live without a
soul. When Sybil commits suicide, Dorian becomes angry rather than feeling
remorse and he finally accepts living without a soul, but it's harder
than you may think. But how long can a person live before becoming
disillusioned with life (or as Dorian says, "Even youth becomes
boring")? Dallamano and Helmut Berger (who is excellent) show us
down to the tiniest detail what it is like to live a soulless life.
An elongated life full of sex (including homosexuality) and
debauchery takes its toll on Dorian as the decades pass until there
is only one thing left to do and that is accept death. Only he and
Henry don't age, which brings up the question: Is Henry the Devil or
is he a Devil's disciple? He very well may be one of those, as he
haunts Dorian through the decades, making him do things that he
really doesn't want to do. But how do you cheat the Devil? This
is a wonderfully mounted film, as the screenplay by Dallamano,
Marcello Coscia (YETI: GIANT OF THE 20TH CENTURY
- 1977) & Günter Ebert (SADOMANIA
- 1981) shows us how the sexual mores have changed over the decades,
leading us into the mod, anything goes contemporary London of the
late-'60s. We watch an aging Alan, who is newly married, having sex
with a black model named Adrienne (Beryl Cunningham; WEEKEND
MURDERS - 1970), while Dorian seduces Alan's new wife Alice
(Maria Rohm; NIGHT
OF THE BLOOD MONSTER - 1970), appearing nude in her bathroom
doorway and then screwing her. There is no boundary Dorian won't
cross. The music, by Peppino De Luca (THE
MAN WITH ICY EYES - 1971), changes through the decades and
adds to the film's effectiveness. This is a great discovery for me
as, I have previously mentioned, this was my first R-Rated film, but
this film goes beyond an R Rating and crosses over the line, not in
violence, mind you, but in depictions of sex.
This Italian/West German/United Kingdom co-production was released
theatrically in the U.S. by A.I.P., with the same edited version
showing up on VHS from NTA Home Entertainment. The widescreen, uncut
DVD from Raro Video (my
review is based on this DVD) is an absolute revelation, as the print
is flawless, looking like it was shot yesterday. The extras on the
disc are sparse, just a filmography of Massimo Dallamano and an
interview with assistant director Maurizio Tanfani, who has lots of
great stories to tell (Franco Nero was considered for the role of
Dorian; Dallamano got turned on by the sex scenes!; Herbert Lom's
nose was so crooked, they had to use putty on it every day to
straighten it out), not all about this film (he had a great career
and worked with some of the genre greats). A nice presentation at a
fairly cheap price. No Blu-Ray at the time of this review, but I
believe that will be rectified soon. Also starring Eleonora
Rossi Drago (IN THE
FOLDS OF THE FLESH - 1970), Renzo Marignano (SEVEN
MURDERS FOR SCOTLAND YARD - 1971) and Francesco Tensi (UNCLE
WAS A VAMPIRE - 1959). Harry Alan Towers (who was producer
here) also produced PACT
WITH THE DEVIL (2002) a better-than-average take on the
Dorian Gray story. Not Rated.
SHADOW
OF ILLUSION (1970) - Mario
Caiano was a pretty prolific and quite good writer/director of
Italian Genre films (he passed away in 2015), giving us such quality
films as NIGHTMARE CASTLE
(1965), EYE IN THE LABYRINTH
(1972), THE MANIAC RESPONSIBLE
(1975) and WEAPONS
OF DEATH (1977), among many others. This is one of his
lesser-known films, a strange supernatural horror film steeped in
Egyptian history and mystery, especially when it comes to the
country's ancient deities and what they represent. This fish out of
water tale, about a woman who travels to Egypt on business, only to
be pursued
by a hippie cult, for reason made clear as the film progresses, is
chock-full of female nudity and a smattering of blood. It goes into
directions you will never see coming, making it a film that gets my
recommendation for fans of supernatural horror films. So let's get to
the film.
Gail Bland (Daniela Giordano; YOUR
VICE IS A LOCKED ROOM AND ONLY I HAVE THE KEY - 1972), an
advertising executive, is sent to Cairo, Egypt to talk to the people
who run Isis Cosmetics, but when she gets to the Cairo airport, no
one from Isis is there to meet her. To make matters worse, a man at
the airport bumps into Gail and steals an important letter she needs
to do business. As she takes a taxi to her hotel, it is blocked by a
crowd of people dancing wildly in the streets, all of them noticing
Gail's red hair. A witch-looking woman sticks her head into the taxi
and tries to sell Gail a ring, but she shows the woman that she is
already wearing a ring that looks exactly like it, so the woman
laughs and leaves. A man then gives Gail a pack of Egyptian
cigarettes, telling her she really needs them, but when she says she
doesn't want them, the man disappears like a ghost. Once Gail gets to
her hotel, the man at the desk seemingly knows her, but he says
someone told him she was arriving, mentioning Gail's red hair.
Apparently, no woman in Egypt has red hair, except for Gail. When
Gail asks him who told him she was coming, he tells her he doesn't
know, also mentioning to her that there were two phone calls for her,
but they didn't leave a message. Gail thinks it was her agency
calling to make sure she arrived safely or someone from Isis
Cosmetics explaining why they didn't meet her at the airport. She is
then given the key to Room 3, a beautiful apartment overlooking the
hotel's garden. As Gail unpacks her bags and takes a shower (Nudity
alert!), she gets a phone call from the front desk telling her that
someone is on the line wanting to talk to her, but when they connect
her, no one is on the other end of the line. Gail notices a
strange-looking small cloth doll in one of the plants in the room and
when she picks it up it pricks her finger. She then looks out her
window and sees a dark-haired woman looking directly at her (played
by Carol Lobravico in her only film role. Her tragic death will be
explained at the end of this review.), but she quickly walks away
when she realizes Gail has seen her. Exactly what is going on here?
At the hotel's bar, Gail meets a strange man (William Berger; THE
MURDER CLINIC - 1966) who says to her, "She is
the mistress of my soul, the one who wears the ring of Isis",
referring to the ring Gail wears on her finger. She tells him she has
been wearing the ring for a year, but she had no idea it had any
meaning. The man asks her how she got it and Gail replies from her
mother, it's always been in her family. The man knows Gail's name and
when she asks how, he replies, "This is a country of mystery,
where no one can keep a secret." Gail then tells the man that
Isis Cosmetics insisted she come alone to Egypt to discuss a new
perfume they are launching, called "Isis", but they failed
to meet her at the airport or call her at the hotel, referring to
them as "the ghosts who brought her here." Little does she
know that she is not far off her assessment of them. No one knows
anything about Isis Cosmetics; they're not even in the phone
directory, but Gail does have the address they gave her and that is
her next step in unraveling the mystery. The man looks at the address
and tells her it is a small street in the "old town" and
the bartender says it's directly behind the Mosque of Omar, only it
is not an area where a woman should go alone. When Gail asks the man
his name, he tells her to call him Caleb and he offers to accompany
Gail to the address tomorrow at 10:00 am and she accepts. She also
accepts Caleb's offer to be her tour guide for the night. When she is
on the dance floor of a disco, Gail meets the brother and sister team
of Seth (Antonio Cantafora; BARON BLOOD
- 1972) and Nephthys (Krista Nell; THE
SLASHER...IS THE SEX MANIAC! - 1972), Seth calling her
"the girl with the flaming red hair" and how they were
waiting for her because "It was pre-destined that we meet."
When Gail asks how they know her, Seth says, "It's better if you
don't ask too many questions. It could be dangerous, as a fact."
Gail smokes some of the Egyptian cigarettes the man left for her in
the taxi and it's plain to see that they were laced with some
acid-like drug, as she dances the night away with Seth and his sister
(who doesn't speak), but she does notice that Caleb is no longer
there. Gail stumbles into her hotel room and when she tries to go to
sleep, all she can see are close-ups of strange people's faces and
they are all laughing at her (The visuals, including a naked Nephthys
walking towards an equally naked Gail, are filmed like she is
tripping on LSD). When Nephthys begins making Sapphic love to Gail,
she sees that everyone are watching them, as if they belonged to some
type of coven. "Cult" would be a more appropriate term.
At 10:00 am, Caleb meets Gail at her hotel and they go to the
address written on a piece of paper. They ring the doorbell and no
one answers, so Caleb finds another way into the building and lets
Gail in. He and Gail go exploring, but the building seems to be
empty. When Caleb goes upstairs to see if anyone is there, Gail meets
a young girl who is singing "Three Blind Mice", who tells
Gail she doesn't belong here because "the walls have arms like
tentacles" and to leave immediately because it's a trap. When
the young girl sees Caleb approaching, she quickly runs away and
Caleb wants to know what she said to Gail. She tells Caleb she
doesn't know and wants to leave the building as quickly as possible.
Gail now believes Isis Cosmetics doesn't exist and wants to call her
agency back in New York, but Caleb tells her to calm down and not to
let a little girl frighten her; telling Gail she is safe with him.
But is she? When Gail gets back to her hotel, she tries to call New
York, only to be told that it is impossible because there was a
breakdown in the line overseas and they don't know when it will be
fixed. Why does Caleb give a sly smile when he hears this? Caleb
tells Gail to quit worrying about her job and pretend she is on
vacation until the phone lines are fixed. Caleb tells her he will
take her places where she can breathe the air of the pharaohs, who
have been sleeping for thousands of years, encased in their tombs!
Unlike me, Gail is not creeped-out by this at all and when Caleb asks
her if he can call her by her first name, we can see a romance is
developing, but is this wise?
Caleb takes Gail to all the tourist attractions, including the
pyramids and the Sphinx, riding on camels and falling in love. Caleb
knows his Egyptian history, taking Gail to the Cairo Museum and
showing her statues of Horus, the son of Osiris and Isis. He then
shows her the statue of Seth, the "Prince of Evil" and the
jealous brother of Osiris. Osiris is the "Lord of the
Shadows" and the symbol of resurrection. Isis is the
"Goddess of Fertility." Caleb makes a remark that Isis
resembles Gail (Isis wore the same ring Gail wears and it is said
that she also had red hair) and Gail says that Osiris resembles Caleb
(But Caleb asks Gail how she knows that since Osiris always wears a
mask. Caleb wears a different kind of mask; one you cannot see.).
They both are right, but what does this have to do with anything?
Actually, quite a bit, but be patient, we'll get there eventually.
Legend has it that Seth and his sister Nephthys were jealous of
Osiris and plotted to kill him. They divided his body into little
pieces and scattered them throughout Egypt so no one could ever put
them back together again. Seth desired Isis for his wife, but she
missed her loving husband, wandering throughout the land in search of
the pieces of his body. Ra, the Sun God, took pity on Isis when she
found all the pieces and restored Osiris back to life. Gail then
says, "And they lived happily ever after", but Caleb says
no, they didn't. Isis later disappeared and since then Osiris has
been searching the land for her, to take her back with him to the
Kingdom of the Dead. "One day, Isis will return, with a magic
symbol on her finger and her flaming red hair", Caleb concludes.
Is anyone making a connection yet? Allow me to continue to clarify
some things.
"Every legend is born of the truth":
Caleb tells Gail that the people she met at the disco are part of a
hippie cult that are gathered in Egypt to "resume an ancient
cult", telling Gail to stay away from them because they are
dangerous. They are trying to invoke Osiris to put his power at their
disposal, but Caleb says they are not prepared for what comes next.
It will be fatal for them, saying to Gail, "Everything is
superstition, but once proved, it becomes science." As an
example, he asks Gail if she believes in love and she says yes. He
then asks if she has ever seen love and Gail answers no. "In
that case love is a superstition to you, isn't it?" asks Caleb.
Gail just smiles and they walk out of the museum, holding hands. Gail
tells Caleb that she wants to walk around town on her own ("I'll
confess, your charm is beginning to scare me!") and they part
ways, Caleb telling her if she needs or wants him, he is just a phone
call away. A towel-headed Egyptian man walks up to Gail and offers to
show her some genuine Egyptian souvenirs. Gail agrees, but tells him
to be quick about it. He takes her to a nearby bazaar and when she
begins looking at a red scarf, Seth and his sister suddenly appear,
Seth telling Gail she should buy the blue scarf because it goes with
her red hair. It turns out the entire hippy cult is also at the
bazaar and a fight breaks out between the hippies and the merchants.
Seth leads Gail away from the fray, telling her it is much too
dangerous for her to be there, so he drives Gail and his sister to an
unknown location and stops the car. Gail knows the fight was nothing
but a set-up so Seth could get her alone (Seth doesn't deny it), but
she asks him why he is so interested in her. Seth tells Gail,
"There is a little oasis in the desert about ten miles out of
town, where you'll find the ruins of a temple dedicated to Osiris.
There, once every month when the moon rises to the sky to her full
splendor and the shadows of night turn into day, all of the true
believers gather to celebrate the victory over the Prince in Black.
It's really a sight not to be missed." Seth tells Gail the
celebration is tomorrow night and wants to know if Gail will come.
Something tells me she will have no choice in the matter, since Seth
forgot to mention that the ritual needs a human sacrifice and since
Gail looks so much like Isis, the sacrifice will be her. That's the
story, but what happens next, I'll let you discover. I will tell you
this: Gail arrives at the celebration, is stripped completely naked
and tied spread-eagle to a stone altar, where the hippie cult offer
her as a sacrifice to Osiris in exchange for his power over death.
Before that happens, Gail receives a box of chocolates from the
dark-haired woman. The chocolates are drugged with an LSD-like
substance, leaving Gail unable to defend herself when she arrives at
the oasis. More trippy visuals follow as the cult dance around Gail
naked in a ritualistic dance that must be seen to be appreciated.
Will Gail escape the ritual or will the hippies succeed? And how is
Caleb involved? It not far off the mark to imagine that Gail is the
reincarnation of Isis and Caleb is actually the reincarnation of
Osiris, but is that enough to save Gail? You'll have to watch the
film to find out.
This Gothic supernatural horror film succeeds thanks to the
on-location Egyptian visuals, including getting to film at the feet
of the Sphinx, which is a rarity, since it has been off limits to
people for quite some time (Legend has it that Napoleon's soldiers
destroyed the Sphinx's nose, but that is a fallacy; the Sphinx is
made primarily of limestone and Egypt's wicked weather eroded the
nose). To see the Sphinx up-close, such as in this film, is a real
treat for viewers, especially those who are archaeology nuts, such as
myself. Both Daniela Giordano and Krista Nell spend a good part of
their screen time completely naked (When is Nell not naked on film?),
making this film easy on the eyes (There is also some bloody '70s
gore, but it is very sparse). As for your ears, Carlo Savina (NAKED
YOU DIE - 1968; ...AND
GOD SAID TO CAIN - 1970) offers an excellent music score,
full of Egyptian instruments during the ritualistic sacrifice
dancing, some trippy acid rock during the disco scenes and guitar
ballads when the hippies gather together in a circle and sing around
a campfire. There's also a strange rape scene late in the film when
the hippie cult discover a man and a woman spying on them. The men
gang rape the female, while the dark-haired woman whips the man
viciously with a cat 'o nine tails. It really doesn't make much sense
since they let them go once they are done with them. Director Mario
Caiano (ULYSSES
AGAINST THE SON OF HERCULES - 1962; ERIK
THE VIKING - 1965; THE
FIGHTING FIST OF SHANGHAI JOE - 1973; THE
CRIMINALS ATTACK. THE POLICE RESPOND. - 1977), working with
a screenplay from the film's producer, Fabio Piccioni (BLACK
LEMONS - 1970; QUEEN
KONG - 1977; MURDER
OBSESSION - 1981), disowned this film and never watched it
because of bad memories he had about the film's main investor pulling
out at the last minute, leaving him with little money to make the
film. Luckily, Frank Agrama, an Egypt native and director of
previously mentioned QUEEN KONG
and DAWN OF THE MUMMY
(1981) was able to get Caiano to film in Egypt for very little
money and William Berger offered to star in the film at a very
reduced pay scale, so Caiano was able to make the film, but he still
couldn't erase the bad memories. He really has nothing to be ashamed
of here, because this film is just unusual and colorful enough to
make it an enjoyable ride, even though the film stretches credibility
to the breaking point, but what horror film doesn't? The true
tragedy to this film is what happened to actress Carol Lobravico
after she acted in it. Carol was the wife of actor William Berger and
she agreed to act in this film for little or no money to help Caiano
out, but after finishing this film she died in what best can be
described as a preventable tragedy. According to IMDb: "On
the night of August 5th, 1970, she and her husband were in their
villa with seven friends when the police raided the villa and found
0.9 grams of hashish.
Since possession of hash
was a major crime in Italy at the time, everyone was arrested and put
in prison, except for Carol, who was put in a psychiatric hospital.
Everyone was acquitted except for Carol, who was suffering from
hepatitis. She was locked up in the psychiatric hospital and denied
treatment for her hepatitis, even going as far as tying her to her
bed. On October 14th, 1970, Carol Lobravico died of acute
peritonitis, her screams of pain going ignored. In 1974, William
Berger wrote a book titled 'House Of The Angels: Love Notes From The
Asylum', which described his deceased wife's suffering at the hands
of unfeeling asylum doctors." All because of 0.9
grams of cannabis, something that would barely get you a ticket
today. Italy in the '70s was a pretty brutal place to live and this
is but one story to prove it.
Filmed as OMBRE ROVENTI
("Burning Shadows"), this film never had a legitimate
release in the United States, neither a theatrical or home video
release in any format. Gray market seller Midnight Video (who went
legit, first under the name Midnight Legacy and then changing their
name to One7Movies) released this film on DVD-R, taken from a
fullscreen (open matte) Japanese VHS tape. It's dubbed in English,
but has non-removable Japanese subtitles. This print can be found
streaming on YouTube, courtesy of user "Unscarred1985". As
of right now, this is your only way of viewing this film in the U.S.,
but don't wait too long because YouTube is going on a deletion spree,
so watch it while there's still time. Also featuring Mirella Pamphili (KILL,
BABY...KILL! - 1966), Enzo Maggio (THE
PIRATE AND THE SLAVE GIRL - 1959) and Giancarlo Bastianoni (THE
TROJAN HORSE - 1961). Not Rated, but it would
probably get an R-Rating by the MPAA if submitted due to the nudity
and violence.
SHRIEK
OF THE MUTILATED (1974) - This
classic low-budget gem finally is available on DVD. For the
uninitiated, the story goes as follows: Dr. Ernst Prell (Alan Brock)
brings four of his students to the private Boot Island to search for
a Yeti. Seven years earlier, the good doctor also brought four
students to the island in search of the same Yeti with disasterous
results. Three of the students didn't come
back
alive, their bodies mutilated. On the island, the four students meet
Ernst's associate, Dr. Karl Werner (Tawm Ellis), and his mute Indian
servant, Laughing Crow (Ivan Agar), who serves them some unknown meat
which they all dislike except Keith Henshaw (Michael Harris), Ernst's
favorite student. Tom (Jack Neubeck) is the first student to be
attacked and killed by the Yeti (all that's left of him is a severed
leg). Lynn (Darcy Brown, who is a dead-ringer for Velma in the SCOOBY-DOO
cartoons) is the next student to be offed by the white-haired demon.
Ernst uses Tom's severed leg as bait and is attacked by the Yeti but
survives. Karen (Jennifer Stock), another student, finds the rest of
Tom's body hidden in a greenhouse but can't get Keith or Ernst to
believe her. Ernst and Keith use Lynn's body to snare the Yeti in an
elaborate trap. The Yeti gets away and Keith follows it, only to
discover that this whole trip was just a ruse. They have been set up
by Ernst and Karl, as their bodies are to be served for breakfast for
Ernst's cannabalistic associates, who are staying in a motel a few
miles away. It seems the best-tasting human meat is that of someone
who is frightened to death (or as they say, "Untouched by the
blade."), which they do to Karen using the Yeti (actually Karl
in a costume). Keith is given a choice: Join the cult or end up as
Karen (this is after they all attack Keith with forks!). The film
ends with Keith drooling over the body of Karen as Laughing Crow,
electric knife in hand, asks, "Mr. Henshaw... white meat or
dark?" For long a favorite of mine, SHRIEK
OF THE MUTILATED is presented on DVD in a tattered,
hacked-up print that, though better looking than any VHS version
available, seems to be missing pieces of gore that appear in the
cassette versions. The biggest omission here is the song
"Popcorn" by the group Hot Butter during the party scene at
the beginning of the film. It has been replaced by some public domain
music track and it sticks out like a sore thumb since it's the only
true stereo dub track in the entire film! The song's omission really
doesn't hurt the film, though (although it would have been nice if
Retromedia Entertainment owner Fred Olen Ray would have opened his
creaking wallet and paid the music licensing fees, instead of blaming
"audio imperfections" on the original negative, which is
absolutely ridiculous and easily fixed.). Directed by the late
Michael (listed here as "Mike") Findlay and photographed by
wife Roberta Findlay, both responsible for many classic
exploitation films of the 60's & 70's, including TAKE
ME NAKED (1966), THE
TOUCH OF HER FLESH (1967), THE
KISS OF HER FLESH (1968) and the infamous SNUFF
(1976). The wickedly clever screenplay is by Ed Adlum (co-written
with Ed Kelleher of VOODOO
DOLLS - 1990 and MADONNA:
A CASE OF BLOOD AMBITION - 1990 infamy), who also wrote and
directed another minor gem, INVASION
OF THE BLOOD FARMERS (1972; also co-written with Kelleher). SHRIEK
OF THE MUTILATED is not overly bloody, but the subject
matter and the distasteful final denouement make it seem sleazier
than it actually is. The scene early on of a wife getting even with
her crazy husband with the help of a plugged-in toaster in a bathtub
is a classic of trash cinema. The cast of non-professional actors
acquit themselves rather nicely and on the whole deliver a sense of
realism to their roles which also helps the film leap ever-so-gently
over the edge. You could do a whole lot worse than purchasing this
DVD since it will probably be the only chance to view it in this
format in the near future (according to Fred Olen Ray, who has been
known, how should I say?, for stretching the truth). I just wish it
was in better shape and more complete. This is the best fake Yeti
film that you are ever going to see. A Retromedia
Entertainment DVD Release. Also available on Public Domain DVD
from Alpha Video, which is also
missing the Hot Butter tune. If you want to hear the tune, Amazon
Prime offers the film streaming in its most complete version,
including the Hot Butter instrumental tune. Rated R.
SILENT
NIGHT, BLOODY NIGHT (1972) -
After watching this film dozens of times (starting out with the Paragon
Video VHS and then many stand-alone and compilation DVDs
(including one from the now-defunct Diamond Entertainment, the VAULT
OF HORROR 10 MOVIES compilation and the CHILLING
CLASSICS 50 MOVIE PACK), all in the fullscreen format (the
usual way films that have fallen into the Public Domain are shown),
imagine my surprise when I discovered that Code
Red had released the film in 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen format
(on a double
feature DVD with a 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen version of INVASION
OF THE BLOOD FARMERS - 1972). Film Chest released their own
widescreen version of this film and I can't say anything about it
because I haven't seen it, but I did see their "Digitally
Remastered" version of DON'T
LOOK IN THE BASEMENT (1973) and it left a lot to be desired.
Besides some bad emulsion scratches
in the beginning two minutes (which seems to be the standard for
films of this vintage) and some emulsion scratches at reel changes,
the film looks really good and if you liked it before in its
fullscreen version, you're going to love the widescreen version. For
reasons that escape me, I never saw this film theatrically, not even
under its alternate title DEATHOUSE,
(it was filmed under the title THE NIGHT OF THE DARK FULL MOON)
so seeing it in widescreen on a 60" plasma TV screen was really
an eye-opener. And a word of warning: This is a film that demands
100% of your attention, so if you are thinking of putting this film
on while you do chores or work on your computer, pick another film.
This is a literal film where you have to actually use your brain to
figure things out, because not everything is spelled out in black and
white. There are some surprising scenes of brutal violence that hold
much more of an impact if you watch the film with all your attention
and the extended flashback tinted goldenrod (or a color close to it)
during the finale of the film is full of familiar faces if you were
ever into any of Andy Warhol's "Factory" work. Quite
frankly, if you don't give this film your full attention, you have no
right to watch it. The film is narrated by Diane Adams (genre
vet Mary Woronov, who was married to this film's director from 1970
to 1973). She talks about the history of the Butler House, and it's a
pretty sad story. On Christmas Eve, 1950, Wilfred Butler comes
running out of his house totally on fire and dies in the snow of his
burns. Wilfred Butler was a stranger to his hometown due to something
that happened in the house 15 years earlier and he hardly ever lived
in that house since then, which was why his death at the house was a
surprise to the residents. The town coroner officially announces that
Wilfred's death was an accident (actor Philip Bruns; RETURN
OF THE LIVING DEAD PART II [1987] plays Wilfred in all the
photos, but we never meet him in person), but Mary was one of the
only one to think the opposite (she just has a feeling) and while
Wilfred is being buried (NO ONE showed up for his funeral; his
headstone reads: "Who Bears The Cross Shall Wear The Crown")
and we see a strange person playing the organ at the Butler House
the same time Wilfred is being buried and he is very interested in
the Butler family photos that fill the house (Stay with me, this will
all make sense). Diane grew up in this town (as a matter of fact, her
father is the Mayor) and she hears that Jeffrey Butler (James
Patterson; who died of cancer shortly after this film was finished
[it was filmed between 1970 to 1972] and his voice had to be looped
by someone else) is selling the beautiful house for $50,000 and she
wants to take one more look at it before the town buys it and tears
it down. You see, back in 1950, Wilfred Butler left the house and
everything else he owned to his only living relative, Jeffrey, with
just one codicil in the will: Jeffrey has to leave the house as
Wilfred left it "to remind the world of its inhumanity and
cruelty" (Believe me, all these obtuse clues really do lead
somewhere). News of the sale of the house reaches across State lines
and one crazy inmate (whom we cannot see) escapes using a pipe wrench
as a weapon and stealing a car, heading for the Butler House. The
lawyer that Jeffrey hired to sell the house, the married John Carter
(Patrick O'Neal; CHAMBER OF HORRORS
- 1966), brings along is mistress "secretary" Ingrid
(Astrid Hereen; THE THOMAS
CROWN AFFAIR - 1968) for a little nookie action between
business. John goes to talk to the Mayor (Walter Abel), Mary's
father, about selling the house, but he is ambushed by the Sheriff
(Walter Klavun), "Communications Director" Tess (Fran
Stevens), who is nothing but the switchboard operator, and the hard
of hearing and talking head of the local newspaper, Charlie (John
Carradine), who rings a bell (the kind you find at the desk of a
motel) everytime he disagrees with something, who are also in the
room. John offers the house for $50,000, but the Mayor says he will
have to travel to the next town tomorrow to take out a loan at the
bank, so John and Ingrid decide to stay in the Butler House, even
though everyone else warns him against it. He should have listened to
them. Ingrid gets a phone call from Tess, just to make sure the phone
is working. While they are in bed (after eating a meal, which they
bought at a local deli!), the killer brutally slaughters John and
Ingrid with an axe (it's really bloody) and the killer reads a
passage from the Bible and leaves a crucifix in John's bloody hand.
The Sheriff then gets a phone call from the killer and thinks it is
Jeffrey Butler. The killer tells him he is sick and needs the Sheriff
to come ro the Butler House immediately, which he does. Busy-body
Tess overhears the conversation and the killer knows she is
listening-in, so he tells her he knows what happeded to Wilfred
Butler's 15 year-old daughter Marianne (Donelda Dunne) and all those
responsible, including Tess, will pay with their lives. (The fact
that most of the people in this town are old should start to be
setting off alarms with some better film detectives). Tess becomes
unhinged, because no matter who she calls, no one answers. Jeffrey
Butler steals John's car (he wouldn't answer the door, so why not
take his car on a cold night?) and drives to Diane's house, where
Diane holds a gun on him until she finds out who he is. It seems
Jeffrey gave his only key to the house to John and since he is not
answering the locked door, he wonders if Diane knows of anyone else
who would have a key. She tells him the Sheriff's Deputy probably has
a key and Jeffrey departs on good terms with Diane. Meanwhile, the
Sheriff notices an old oil lamp lit up on Wilfred Butler's grave and
discovers Wilfred's diary on the ground. Before he can read it, the
killer murders him with a shovel (he was burying John and Ingrid).
Jeffrey returns to Diane's house because he couldn't locate the
Sheriff's Deputy. When Diane mentions that she keeps on getting phone
calls from a woman looking for her father, saying she is staying at
the Butler House in the Reception Room, both Jeffrey and Diane head
to the Butler House in John's stolen car (They have a funny back and
forth about the stolen car earlier before she mentioned the woman).
They find the Sheriff's car (with the lights flashing) at the
gravesight of Jeffrey's grandfather, so they think with both the
lawyer and Shefiff missing, it may not be a good idea to go to the
Butler House (It's refreshing to see two people act level-headed).
They head to town to try and find some help, but when they cannot
find the Deputy, they head to Charlie's newspaper office, who writes
down that Tess went to the Butler House. While Diane stays behind to
do some research, Jeffrey and Charlie head to Tess' house to see if
they can stop her before she leaves, but they are too late (the house
is full of chirping birds, which is a sly clue to the whole story).
The killer drives the Sheriff's car to the Butler House and leaves
the flashing lights on. Diane gets another call from
"Marianne", who tells her to mention Christmas Eve, 1935 to
her father. Tess arrives at the Butler House and the killer tells her
to take his hand, except he takes hers by chopping it off. Diane digs
through Charlie's newspaper archives and comes up with some
disturbing facts, which even affects her. In 1930, Wilfred's beloved
wife died of tuberculosis. A short time later, his daughter Marianne
was raped (possibly by Wilfred himself) and she had a baby, which
turned out to be Jeffrey. Even more disturning is that Wlfred Butler
allowed his house to be used as a mental institution, but the doctors
and psychiatrists were more interested in living the good life than
curing their patients. Wilfred made a big mistake a couple of years
earlier by having Marianne committed to the asylum (Jeffrey has
always believed his mother died at childbirth. He didn't even know
his mother was Marianne.). The rest of the story is purposely missing
from Charlie's archives and we soon find out why. Diane and Jeffrey
find Charlie's car burning and his dead body nearby (his hands were
cut off). Diane blames all the deaths of Jeffrey (Wouldn't you?), but
the truth finally comes out thanks to the long flashback sequence at
the end if the film. It seens on Christmas Eve, 1935, all the doctors
were getting drunk at the big hall table in the Butler House. Wilfred
thinks this is the perfect time to save his daughter and
release all the other patients, who have been
mistreated by their doctors (see if you can count the many Andy
Warhol Factory stars playing inmates and doctors. There is Candy
Darling, Ondine, Tally Brown, Lewis Love, Jack Smith and Susan
Rothenberg. Hell, even Mary Woronov got her start appearing in
Warhol's Factory films). Unfortunately, the inmates not only kill
their doctors, they mistake Marianne for one of the staff and kill
her, too. Wilfred is only able to escape with Jeffrey. Yes, you
guessed it, since 1935, the entire town has been occupied by crazy
people, who have procreated and filled the town with their equally
crazy offspring (Diane included). The inmates have taken over the
town. But over time, they have begun to live normal lives and
assimilate themselves into society. So just who exactly is the
killer? When Mayor Adams enters the Butler House, he and Jeffrey
shoot each other at the same time, both ending up dead. But neither
of them are the killers. The killer is none other than an 80 year-old
Wilfred Brown, who has been hiding himself in loony bins until the
day his house would be destroyed. He wanted the house to remain
standing forever to remind everyone from town exactly what they had
done. He faked his death in 1950 to see if Jeffrey was a man of his
word, and for 20 years he was, but he nows needs money and decided to
sell the house at a really reduced price (it is actually worth five
times more). It's too late for him. Since Jeffrey and everyone else
involved in Marianne's murder is dead, he goes after Diane, but she
kills him by shooting him with a revolver belonging to Jeffrey. A
year passes and we watch as bulldozers approach to destroy the Butler
House, but nothing will destroy Diane's memories. This is the first
time that I remember an octogenarian serial killer (even the
institution he lived in didn't know his name but, in the film's
biggest mistake, they could have mentioned his age) and director/co-screenwriter
Theodore Gershuny (SUGAR COOKIES
- 1973) keeps you guessing even though he gives you little clues to
keep your investigation alive (he passed away in 2007 after writing
and directing episodes of TV series, like MONSTERS
[1988 - 1990]). Co-Screenwriter (and Co-Producer) Jeffrey Konvitz
went on to write the novel and Produce the eerie horror film THE
SENTINEL (1977; which used real freaks in the freaky
conclusion) and Executive Produced CYBORG
2: GLASS SHADOW (1993; an early film for Angelina Jolie).
Co-Screenwriter Ira Teller did absolutely nothing else in the
filmmaking business besides conduct the final interview with Brandon
Lee, on the set of THE CROW
(1994). I would consider that a curse rather than an achievement.
Producer Ami Artzi was very involved in Cannon Films Productions
(this movie was an early Cannon Film), even Executive Producing
director Menahem Golan's HIT
THE DUTCHMAN (1992). One of the Associate Producers on this
film was Lloyd Kaufman, who formed Troma Films in 1974 with
co-founder Michael Herz (I have met them both and they are really
nice guys. On the other hand, I wouldn't offer them a chance to
distribute my first film, because you'll never see a penny in profit.
They call it "creative bookkeeping".). All in all, if
you want to see SILENT
NIGHT, BLOODY NIGHT done right, you can do no better than
the Code Red DVD. There were two
sequels made, in 2013 & 2015, but I won't even mention their
titles because they are skidmarks on the underwear of life. Rated R.
SQUIRM
(1976) - I remember when I originally viewed this film in a
theater in 1976 that people walked out during the attack scenes
because it just freaked them out. There were a lot of "Ews!"
and "Yucks" being gasped in the audience and rightfully
so. This was a really effective little "nature gone amuck"
horror film about the unlikeliest of killers: Earthworms, or rather,
bloodworms, a breed of worm that can actually bite with pincers
attached to their mouths. That it was based on an actual incident
(but with a lot of liberties taken), just makes it all the more
effective. The opening on-screen crawl explains it all: "Late
in the evening of September 29, 1975, a sudden electrical storm
struck around a rural sea coast area of Georgia. Power lines, felled
by high winds, sent hundreds of thousands of volts surging into the
muddy ground, cutting off all electricity to the small, secluded town
of Fly Creek. During the period that followed the storm, the citizens
of Fly Creek experienced what scientists believe to be one of the
most bizarre freaks of nature ever recorded. This is the story...."
We then view the opening credits, where a young girl on the
soundtrack sings an eerie song with lyrics such as "I can hear
the dark coming up the stairs" as we watch the storm knock down
an electrical tower, sending a live electrical wire to touch the
over-soaked ground with over 300,000 volts of electricity (we will
see that live wire several times in the film), turning normal,
everyday bloodworms into murderous little killers We hear the worms
scream (actually electronically altered sounds of pigs squealing in a
slaughterhouse) and see them in extreme close-up thanks to excellent
macrophotography (which is very creepy and effective). The day after
the storm, we watch Geri Sanders (Patricia Pearcy; THE
HOUSE WHERE DEATH LIVES - 1981) taking a shower, while
worm farm co-owner Roger (R.A. Dow; a stage actor, this being his
only film) cleans up debris on the front lawn of the Sanders'
farmhouse (reportedly in real life to be the most haunted house in
Georgia!) and gets an eyefull of Geri after she steps out of the
shower (he has an extreme crush on her). Geri's mother, Naomi (Jean
Sullivan, in her final film), who just lost her husband (and Geri's
father) a few months ago, is not too pleased that Northerner Mick
(Don Scardino; HE KNOWS
YOU'RE ALONE - 1980) is coming to visit Geri for five days.
Geri asks Roger if she can borrow his truck (which is full of 100,000
earthworms in the back) so she can pick up Mick, because the family
station wagon was not built to travel the rough back roads. He
reluctantly allows her, but Mick's bus is unable to get past a downed
tree five miles from Fly Creek, so the wise-assed bus driver tells
Mick to take a shortcut through the woods if he wants to get to Fly
Creek quicker. After nearly having a large tree branch fall on him
while taking a pee in the woods and falling into a water-filled hole,
he meets Geri on the road and they drive to town, where she has to
pick up a block of ice for home because the electricity is out. While
Geri is getting the ice, Mick stops in to get an eggcream from the
local eating establishment (he has to explain to the girl behind the
counter how to make it), only to discover one of the killer worms in
his drink. The counter girl blames Mick for playing a unfunny
practical joke (because he is a Northerner) and the Sheriff (Peter
MacLean; FORCE: FIVE -
1981) tells Mick to get out of the diner and wants to know what
business he has in town. Mick replies, "No business, just
pleasure." and walks out. When Geri returns the truck, all of
the worms are missing, which pisses-off Roger's father, Willie (Carl
Dagenhart), who says, "Cost me over $300, sonny boy!' to Mick,
but he blames Roger for the lost worms and chews him out in front of
Geri and Mick, which makes Roger hate Mick even more. Geri and Mick
take the station wagon to go antique shopping and stop at the home of
antique dealer Mr. Beardsley, but all they find is a skeleton in the
front yard that looks like it was picked clean. They bring the
Sheriff back, only to discover that the skeleton is gone (we find out
later Roger stole it and hid it in a shed). The Sheriff is not to
pleased with Mick and tells him to get out of town and then chastises
Geri and says, "I have no time to book this little city weasel.
I have a town to put back together." He then turns to Mick and
says, "If I see you one more time, you won't be able to call a
city lawyer...because all the phones are dead." Now that we have
the setup to the film out of the way, including introducing Geri's
younger smart-assed, pot-smoking sister Alma (Fran Higgins, in her
only film appearance), who comes on to Mick and relentlessly makes
fun of Roger (asking him earlier in the film, "Where did you get
that shirt, Roger? Out robbing corpses again?") and their mother
Naomi acting a little psychotic over the loss of her husband, we get
down to the nitty-gritty: the bloodworm attacks. Mick, Geri &
Roger take a boat to go fishing, but one of the worms bites Mick and
tries to burrow into his arm, so he goes to shore to treat it,
leaving Geri and Roger alone on the boat. Geri accidentally knocks
over the box of worms and when Roger tries to sexually attack her,
she knocks Roger to the floor of the boat, where the flesh-hungry
worms burrow into his face (once you see this scene, you will never
forget it). Roger and Geri go overboard, where Roger runs to shore,
screaming bloody murder. Mick discovers the missing skeleton in the
shed, so he and Alma break into the doctor's office and find x-rays
of Mr. Beardsley and discover that the skull is missing the same
three teeth as the x-ray. While Mick and Alma are doing this, Geri
goes home to take a shower, where worms start to slither out of the
showerhead, but they retract when Geri looks up. Geri meets Mick and
Alma, where they all share their stories about what just happened, so
Geri and Mick go to the worm farm, where Mick discovers the corpse of
Willie, his entire torso eaten away and full of hungry worms. They
hop in the car and go to see the Sheriff, but interrupt his spaghetti
dinner (symbolism alert!) with a floozy date. The Sheriff blows them
off because he's more interested in his dinner and scoring with his
floozy. While Mick, Geri, Alma and a weirded-out Naomi are eating
dinner, a tree crashes through the roof (the tree's roots eaten away
by the worms) but, thankfully, no one was injured, but the dining
room is destroyed (this all the more realistic because an actual tree
was dropped by a crane onto the set with the actors not using stunt
people! The fear on their faces is real.). Mick figures out that
light is the worms' kryptonite, so he heads out to get some plywood
to repair the damage before night falls. As he is returning back to
the house, he is attacked and knocked-out by a crazed, worm-riddled
Roger, who tells Mick he spoiled everything for him (He yells out,
"You gonna be spoiled. You gonna be the wormface!").
Nighttime arrives and the worms attack the Sanders home and the town,
first making a meal out of the Sheriff and his floozy as they are
making love in a jail cell (!) and then attacking the town's bar,
Quigleys, killing all the patrons. Mick wakes up and makes a torch
out of his shirt to keep the worms at bay and heads back to save
Geri. Mick arrives to discover Naomi's corpse covered in worms and
must fight a deranged Roger, who has Geri tied-up in the attic. Mick
manages to throw Roger into the sea of worms covering the house's
first floor. but Roger's worm-infested body slithers upstairs and
nearly kills both Geri and Mick as they climb out a second floor window
and hide in a tree. Morning arrives and Geri and Mick are woken up by
a power company employee, who tells them the electricity has been
restored (therefore ending the murderous worm problem). Alma is also
discovered alive, as she was hiding from the worms in the house in a
cedar chest. Fall Creek can now go back to normal, minus a Sheriff
and a bunch of local drunks. This was the debut feature film by
director/writer Jeff Lieberman (BLUE
SUNSHINE - 1977; JUST
BEFORE DAWN - 1980; REMOTE
CONTROL - 1987 and SATAN'S
LITTLE HELPER - 2004), who has been woefully underused in
his career as a director because most of his films are unusual gems,
including this one (Lieberman previously worked as an Associate
Producer on WHO KILLED
MARY WHATS'ERNAME [1971] and was co-writer of the police
thriller BLADE
[1972]). This one has many memorable scenes and still is able to
creep you out. Making worms scary is not an easy feat, but Lieberman
pulls it off in excellent fashion, using the macrophotography of the
screaming worms to jolt you and some very good special makeup effects
(by Bill Milling and multi-Academy Award®-winner Rick Baker, who,
at the time of the writing of this review, officially announced his
retirement) to gross you out. The scene of Roger pulling worms out of
his face was censored from all TV prints and when theatrical
distributor American International cut the film by a minute for a
PG-Rated re-release, this scene was also deleted (along with a couple
of scenes of female topless nudity). This 92-minute version was
offered on VHS first by Vestron
Video and then by MGM/UA
Home Video, but MGM released the uncut 93-minute version on DVD.
The Blu-Ray, released by Shout!
Factory tentpole Scream
Factory, is also the uncut version and is the preferred way of
watching this film. While there are a few speckles of dirt onscreen
here and there, the print is a revelation of details you may not have
noticed in previous versions. What makes the film even more special
is that only a handful of the actors on view were actually actors.
Most of them were locals from Port Wentworth, Georgia, where the film
was made, and it adds realism to the proceedings. Star Don Scardino
would have a healthy career as an actor, but reached far greater
success as a TV series director, which he continues to do today (he
also directed the theatrical film THE
INCREDIBLE BURT WONDERSTONE - 2013). If you want to see a
nature gone amuck film done right, you could do a whole lot worse
than this film. Also starring William Newman, Barbara Quinn, Angel
Sande, Carol Jean Owens and Kim Iocouvozzi. The Blu-Ray also has a
wealth of new extras (as well as Lieberman's commentary from the MGM
DVD), something that Scream Factory is well-known for, as well as
applying little or no DNR to the film prints, so they look like they
did in theaters. A Scream Factory Blu-Ray Release. Unrated.
STANLEY
(1972) - Remember the good old 70's when horror movies rated PG
showed plenty of violence, skin and allowed enough forbidden behavior
to please even the most jaded fan? Today, any horror movie rated PG
would barely pass muster with kids. That's why you never see any.
Even the PG-13 rated ones released today don't hold a candle to the
PG ones of the 70's. Which brings us to STANLEY.
Originally released on a double-bill (remember them?) with NIGHT
OF THE LEPUS
(1972), STANLEY tells the
semi-sweet story of recently returned home (to
everglades Florida) Vietnam veteran Tim (Chris Robinson, the
Director/star of the previously-thought lost horror film THE
INTRUDER [1975} which only-known print was found in an
abandoned storage facility on the outskirts of the Mohave Desert in
2012 and restored for Blu-Ray in 2017!), a Native American who
catches poisonous snakes for their venom, which he sells to local Dr.
Everett (played by screenwriter Gary Crutcher) for research. Since
Tim never hurts the snakes he catches, he builds up a friendship with
them, especially a rattlesnake he calls Stanley. Tim butts heads with
local businessman Mr. Thomkins (the sleazy Alex Rocco), who wants Tim
to help him trap and kill snakes for their skins. Tim refuses
Thomkins' offer, partly because he was responsible for Tim's father's
death (he was shotgunned down, mistaken for an alligator!), partly
because because Thomkins is a raving racist (he calls Tim a
"redstick" ) and mostly because Tim likes snakes better
than people. Tim also supplies snakes to exotic dancer Gloria (Marcia
Knight), who uses them harmlessly in her act at a club run by her
money-grubbing husband Sidney (Rey Baumel). Tim also has to deal with
Thomkins' two right-hand men, Crail (singer Steve Alaimo) and Bob
(Mark Harris), who travel around the swamps capturing snakes for
skins. Tim gets into a fight with Crail and Bob (after catching them
with a truckload of snakes) and Bob gets bit in the ass by Stanley.
Tim reaches the breaking point after getting hit on all sides with
troubles that have to do with his snakes. Thomkins hires a loose
cannon called Psycho Simpson (Paul Avery) to help Crail and Bob with
their snake hunting. When Crail and Bob get caught in some quicksand
and Tim just watches them sink to the bottom, Psycho breaks into
Tim's house and kills Stanley's mate Hazel and their three offspring.
Psycho threatens Tim with an outboard motor but Stanley bites him on
the neck and kills him. Gloria is talked into biting the heads off
snakes in her act by her husband in hopes it will increase business
for his failing club. It does, but when Tim sees the act in the
packed club, he later kills both Gloria and Sid by throwing a bag of
snakes in their bed (in slow-motion, an effective scene) while they
plead for their lives. Tim then kidnaps Thomkins' daughter Susie
(Susan Carroll), who we see earlier is being hit on by her own father
with an incestuous leer, after she sees Tim kill her father by
filling his swimming pool with snakes. It is at this time the
audience is allowed to see that Tim is not the sympathetic hero we
thought him to be. He is actually quite psychopathic and the snakes
revolt when they see he has no respect for anyone but himself.
Director William Grefe is no stranger to horror fans. This lifelong
Florida resident also directed STING
OF DEATH (1966), DEATH
CURSE OF TARTU (1966), MAKO:
THE JAWS OF DEATH (1976) and the classic William Shatner
flick IMPULSE (1974). As a
film, STANLEY is not without
it's charms. One funny scene shows Tim telling the nightclub stage
manager (Butterball Smith) about the death of Hazel and her kids. He
thinks Tim is talking about people that he knows and looks very
concerned. When he realized that Tim is talking about snakes, his
look is absolutely hilarious. There are also copious amounts of
carnage, as we see snakes bite people, snakes themselves being killed
by shotgun, machete and having their heads bitten off. Add in the
incest angle and Tim's character at first portrayed as sympathetic
and eventually as psychotic and you get one strange film that would
not get a PG rating today, especially the scenes in the finale of Tim
killing live snakes by flinging them against the floor and walls
(it's clear they're not fakes). Hell, a film like this couldn't get
made today! In case you didn't know: I like this film a lot. I never
said I had good taste. WARNING: The only uncut version of this film
available in the U.S. is the VHS version released by VidAmerica in
1988 (the box art is above). It runs 106 minutes (not 96 minutes, as
it states on the back of the VHS sleeve). All other U.S. releases of
this title are the edited TV version which runs about 92 minutes and
missing most of the violence and the incest scene. This includes the
print Rhino released on DVD
as part of their HORRIBLE
HORRORS COLLECTION
VOLUME 2.
A VidAmerica
VHS Release. UPDATE: Available on
uncut widescreen DVD from Code
Red. Rated PG.
SUPER
SOUL BROTHER (1978) - I
really feel sorry for people who didn't live through the 70's. It was
a decade when CB radios pre-dated cell phones, going to a disco in
your best polyester suit while cranked on coke or high on pot pre-dated
going to a rave with a bottle of water while sweating-off the
effects of X, and you were able to go to a movie theater and watch a
film with the word "nigger" in the title without Tyler
Perry or Al Sharpton putting a posse together and boycotting your
ass. Only in the 70's, people, only in the 70's. SUPER SOUL BROTHER
was originally released to theaters as THE
SIX THOUSAND DOLLAR NIGGER (and THE
SIX THOUSAND DOLLAR SUPER-BROTHER in less "urban"
areas) and is an ultra-low-budget blaxploitation take-off of TV's THE
SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN (1974 - 1978), directed and
co-written by the man responsible for THE
GUY FROM HARLEM (1976), so you know you're in for some brain
damaged fun. Party comic and Rudy Ray Moore buddy Wildman Steve (real
name: Steve Gallon; PETEY WHEATSTRAW
- 1977) stars as Steve, a "nigger off the streets" who is
kidnapped by crooks Bob (Benny Latimore) and Jim (Lee Cross) and
brought to the laboratory of dwarf mad scientist Dr. Dippy (Peter
Conrad, who can't speak a single line without tripping over his
tongue), who injects Steve with a new serum that gives him
supernormal powers, but unless he gets a neutralizer shot within one
week's time, he will die, There's one caveat: The neutralizer shot
has not been invented yet, but that means very little to Bob and Jim,
who want to use the superhuman Steve to pull-off a multi-million
dollar diamond heist and then let him die (this way, they don't have
to pay him his "cut"). Before any of that happens, we are
subjected to some of the most cheaply filmed dialogue and exposition
scenes that take up nearly three-quarters of the film's running time.
Steve is nothing but a wino (the first time we meet him, he's getting
the shit kicked out of him by three homeless guys for stealing a
newspaper!), but Dr. Dippy's beautiful black assistant, Peggy
(Joycelyn Norris), who is (naturally) a virgin, falls in love with
him and he deflowers her in a swanky apartment (I'm being kind here)
loaned to him by Jim (Peggy: "Steve, don't hurt me with
that ring on your finger!" Steve: "Peggy, that's no
ring. It's the watch on my wrist!"). After getting a shot of the
serum, Bob and Jim convince Steve to pull a "practical joke"
on their friend, which turns out stealing a (Styrofoam) safe from a
jewelry store while Dr. Dippy and his girlfriend, the big-breasted
Monica (the obviously pseudonymous "Wild Savage"), keep the
saleswomen occupied by arguing over the price of a diamond engagement
ring (I never laughed so hard in my life!). When Bob tries to kill
Steve by shooting him in the face and the bullets just bounce-off
("Goddamn, this nigger is bulletproof!"), Steve knocks-out
Bob, hides the diamonds under a huge (Styrofoam) boulder and heads to
Peggy's house, where he himself creates the neutralizer by putting
the ingredients in a flower vase and drinking it! Bob, Jim and Dr.
Dippy force Pe
ggy
and Steve at gunpoint to retrieve the diamonds, but the trio end up
shot dead ($100 to the first person who can tell me who shot Dr.
Dippy!) and Steve and Peggy live happily ever after with an on-screen
scrawl that promises "This Nigger Is Coming Back" (he
didn't). It's hard to describe how utterly cheap and ridiculous
this film really is. Director Rene Martinez (who also gave us ROAD
OF DEATH [1973], as well as the aforementioned THE GUY
FROM HARLEM) makes any Rudy Ray Moore film look polished and
professional in comparison. The acting is worse than amateurish
(especially Wildman Steve [who passed away in 2004] and Peter Conrad,
who smokes a cigar that is almost bigger than he is!) and the sets,
sound recording, editing, music and camerawork are all sub-level 70's
porn quality. What makes this film so watchable are the quotable
pieces of crazy (and racist) dialogue and silly sight gags
(screenplay written by Martinez and Laura S. Diaz). Wildman Steve
mainly does his dirty nightclub comedy act ("A white woman once
offered me fifty dollars to 'knock her out'. I fucked her three times
and then hit her over the head with a brick!"), but he says some
other crazy things like telling Jim's maid (Addie Williams),
"Wash my butt, not my back!" and "Come in this water
and let's have a fuck!" when he is taking a shower. My favorite
line is when he describes why marijuana is illegal, but homosexuality
is not, by saying, "If you get caught with a joint in your
mouth, it better be connected to two balls!" The fact that it
takes nearly two-thirds of the film's running time for Steve to do
anything slightly superhuman shows the cheapness of the production,
but when he proves his super-strength by bending an iron bar, lifting
and obvious Styrofoam safe (which supposedly weighs 2000 pounds!),
beating up (and killing) two of the three bums who picked on him when
he lived on the streets (in some of the worst fight choreography I've
ever seen) and then stealing the safe (it's the same safe that was in
Dr. Dippy's lab!) from the jewelry store (When he puts the safe in
the trunk of Bob's Cadillac, the shocks don't even move! Now that's
one well-built car!), you'll either laugh yourself silly or turn the
damn film off. There is no middle ground with this film. Either
you'll love it for its awful cheapness or you'll hate it for its
awful cheapness. Also starring John A. Jacobs, Larry Hannah, Eric
Gregory Gallon and Herbert Murray. A Xenon
Home Video VHS Release. Available on DVD
from Vinegar Syndrome. Rated
R.
SUSPIRIA
(1977) - This is the first film in director Dario Argento's
"Three Mothers" trilogy and probably the most-watched of
the three, which continued with INFERNO
(1980) and ended with MOTHER
OF TEARS (2007), Since this film was recently remade
(it is actually very good!) and showing in theaters (at the time of
this review), I thought it was about time to give the original a
proper review.
Susy Bannion (Jessica Harper; THE
EVICTORS - 1979) arrives from New York to attend a
prestigious dance academy in Freiberg, Germany. She gets a taste of
what the locals think of foreigners as soon as she steps out of the
airport in the
pouring rain, as no taxi will stop to pick her up until she steps in
front of one (the taxi driver, played by Argento regular Fulvio
Mingozzi [TENEBRE -
1982], refuses to get out of the cab to help her with her bags). Once
in the taxi, Suzy give the driver the address where she needs to go
and he takes her to the dance academy, an imposing old red building
(red is the primary color of this film) with a huge front double
door. As Suzy walks towards the door, student Pat Hingle (Eva Axen)
comes out of the door muttering something, but all Suzy can hear are
the words "secrets" and "irises". Suzy rings the
doorbell and a female voice on the intercom tells her to go away,
even when Suzy gives her name, so she has no other choice but to get
back in the taxi and go to a hotel (the front door is locked). We
then follow Pat as she is running nervously in the rain, always
looking behind her. She arrives at friend Caroline's (Renata Zamengo; THE
PERFUME OF THE LADY IN BLACK - 1974) apartment building and
Caroline tells her she is welcome to stay as long as she wants, as
long as she doesn't mind sleeping on the couch. All Pat will tell her
is that she was kicked out of school, not telling her why, but it is
obvious she is frightened of something or someone. When Pat uses the
bathroom, a gust of wind blows the window open, scaring the crap out
of Pat, but Caroline closes the window and tells her to relax. When
Caroline leaves the bathroom, the door slams shut and locks. Pat is
grabbed by an arm that bursts through the window, as Caroline tries
to get in, hearing Pat's screams fade, seemingly moving to the roof
of the apartment building, which leads Caroline to the lobby.
Suddenly, Pat's bloody body comes crashing through the lobby's
stained glass ceiling (an Argento trademark) and an electrical cord
wraps around her neck, hanging her, as she swings back and forth. We
then see Caroline lying dead on the lobby floor, her body impaled by
the falling stained glass.
The next morning, Suzy returns to the dance academy, where she meets
headmistress Madame Blanc (Joan Bennett; HOUSE
OF DARK SHADOWS - 1970; in her final big screen appearance),
who introduces her to Miss Tanner (Alida Valli; KILLER
NUN - 1978), the strict woman who controls the classes and
the day-to-day activities. The police are also there investigating
Pat's death, so Suzy interjects, telling the police what she saw last
night. Madame Blanc tells Suzy that her room is not ready, so she is
having her stay with one of the students in town. Miss Tanner takes
Suzy to the locker room and introduces her to the other students. The
only two students of importance are Olga (Barbara Magnolfi; THE
SISTER OF URSULA - 1978), a snotty girl whom Suzy is about
to share an apartment with and Sara (Stefania Casini; ANDY
WARHOL'S BAD - 1977), another American student who is going
to be Suzy's best friend. Also at the academy are male student Mark
(popular Spanish singer Miguel Bose; STAR
KNIGHT - 1986), who takes an instant shine to Suzy; and the
blind Daniel (Flavio Bucci; TEX
AND THE LORD OF THE DEEP - 1985), who walks around with the
aide of a guide dog and plays piano during dance classes. Oh, and
there's also someone else: a hulking silent servant named Pavlo
(Giuseppe Transocchi; BLACK JESUS
- 1968), whom Miss Tanner tells Suzy had all his teeth pulled out so
he could be fitted with false teeth, which is why he smiles so much
(his dentist must have been a quack because his dentures are ill-fitting!).
This is when the strange shit begins to happen. As Suzy walks out of
the recital room, she sees an ugly maid polishing silverware and one
item lights up and engulfs Suzy. The next day, Suzy goes to her first
dance class and passes out, waking up in a bed and being attended to
by Professor Verdegast (Renato Scarpa (DON'T
LOOK NOW - 1973), who puts Suzy on a restricted diet and
tells her to drink a glass of wine when she first gets up and when
she retires for the night. Madame Blanc tells Suzy not to worry, her
room is now ready and Pavlo will make sure she eats right and have
her wine ready for her. Suzy never wanted to live in a dorm room, but
it is quite clear that she is being influenced by some unknown force
and that everything that happens to her happens for a reason.
One night, while Suzy is brushing her hair, she finds maggots on her
brush, looks up and notices that a mass of maggots are falling from
the ceiling. As a matter of fact, all the female students come
screaming out of their dorm rooms, as maggots are falling on them,
too. Miss Tanner and Mark go to the attic and find a wooden crate
crawling with thousands of maggots. Miss Tanner tells the students
that the maggots came from a crate of food they ordered from a new
vendor, but no one bothers to ask why a crate of food is being stored
in the attic (That would be my first question!). Madame Blanc tells
them that everyone will be sleeping together on cots in the recital
hall, even the teachers, until an exterminator comes tomorrow to get
rid of the maggots. What happens next is pure WTF?!? cinema of the bizarre.
In the recital hall, the students are sleeping on one side of the
room while the teachers sleep on the other side, sheets hanging on
ropes separating them, Sara is awoken by a strange snoring noise and
Suzy says it is probably Madame Blanc, but Sara says it couldn't be,
all the teachers in the school live in town; they leave the school
precisely when dinner is over. So who's snoring on the other side of
the sheet? A couple of days later, Sara discovers that none of the
teachers live in town, so they must be staying somewhere in the
school, but where? Sara aims to find out, so when night comes and
everyone is asleep, she searches the school, only the school
apparently doesn't like it, leading Sara to a room full of razor
wire, which she becomes trapped in. The more she struggles, the more
painful it becomes for her (and the viewer), leading to her death.
The next morning, Miss Tanner tells Suzy that Sara suddenly left the
school earlier in the morning, but Suzy doesn't believe her because
Sara would have least have said goodbye to her. Suzy calls Sara's
guardian, Dr. Frank Mandel (a dubbed Udo Kier; MARK
OF THE DEVIL - 1970), who tells Suzy that Sara said nothing
to him about leaving school and he thinks Suzy should know the
history of the school she is attending.
In 1895, a witch by the name of Helena Markos moved into the
building before it became a dance academy. She wrote several books on
witchcraft under the name "The Black Queen", but she was
constantly persecuted by people in town. In 1905, Helena burned to
death when the building mysteriously caught fire and burned to the
ground. It was rebuilt and turned into a dance academy, but it was
plagued with unexplainable deaths and other supernatural occurrences,
some people believing that Helena never died in the fire and she is
now looking for a successor, which she has not found...yet. After
hearing that story and finding it hard to swallow, Suzy decides to
search the school herself, but she is not going to like what she
finds. Is history about to repeat itself?
While the film doesn't make much sense (screenplay by Argento and
Daria Nicolodi, who has a quick cameo as a woman at the airport), there's
no denying that it has a style unlike any film that came before or
after it. Many films tried to copy it, but failed and there can only
be one reason why. Only Dario Argento can deliver an Argento film.
The first thing you'll notice is Argento's use of primary colors,
which permeate this film. There's a reason why red is the primary
color most used and I don't think I have to explain why (Only Mario
Bava, who directed such films as BLACK
SABBATH [1963], BLOOD
AND BLACK LACE [1964] and KILL,
BABY...KILL [1966] could trump Argento when it came to the
use of color). The killings are also shocking, including Daniel
getting his throat ripped out by his guide dog, Pat and Caroline's
deaths and especially Sara's death by razor wire, all of them painful
to watch. What more can I say about this film that hasn't been said
before? This film forever changed the way we look at supernatural
horror films and its influence is felt, even today. This was also the
first film that the "Goblins" scored musically and it is
really intense and effective at eliciting an atmosphere of terror and
dread (Argento played the score during filming to get the proper
responses from his actors, as the film was lensed MOS [without sound]
and would be dubbed later in post-production). Be aware that though
this film is about "Mater Suspiriorum" (The "Mother of
Sighs"), her name is never uttered here and is first mentioned
at the beginning of INFERNO
(1980). Here she is only mentioned by her earthly name, Helena
Markos. The actress portraying Helena, Lela Svasta, was, according to
Jessica Harper, a 90-year old ex-prostitute that Argento found on the
street. Now I don't know if that is true, but there's no denying that
her visage packs a visceral punch.
Originally released theatrically in the United States by
International Classics, Inc. (a subsidiary of 20th Century Fox) and
then released on VHS by Magnum
Entertainment, who offered it "uncut" (it wasn't
really, as many scenes are missing frames and bits of dialogue) and
in widescreen before widescreen was something we knew we wanted and
needed. In 2001, Anchor Bay Entertainment released a truly uncut
print on DVD (as a
stand-alone disc or as a 2-disc "Collector's Edition"),
which Blue Underground
eventually released on DVD.
Then Synapse Films gained
the rights and released it on DVD and Blu-Ray
with a ton of extras. This is the Blu-Ray you want, that is if you
can find it (it went OOP fairly quickly). Also starring Susanna
Javiocoli (BODY PUZZLE
- 1992), Rudolf Schundler (THE EXORCIST
- 1973), Jacopo Mariani (Argento's DEEP RED
- 1975), Franca Scagnetti (THE
SUSPICIOUS DEATH OF A MINOR - 1975) and Margherita Horowitz
(Argento's THE CAT O'
NINE TAILS - 1971). The theatrical version is Rated R,
while all the disc versions are Not Rated.
TERROR
FIRMER (1999) - Director/star
Lloyd Kaufman proves once again that sometimes having a "kitchen
sink" mentality can really work in your favor. Before Kaufman's POULTRYGEIST:
NIGHT OF THE CHICKEN DEAD (2006) came along, this was Troma
Films' premiere horror comedy, edging out Kaufman's THE
TOXIC AVENGER (1984) and TROMA'S
WAR (1988) for sheer idiotic brilliance and wall-to-wall
gore. This film is quite complex in its simplicity: Blind director
Larry Benjamin (Kaufman) is trying to make his gore masterpiece, but
a female serial killer begins murdering cast and crew members in
increasingly bloodier and gorier ways (The film opens with her
tearing-off a chauvinistic guy's leg and beating him to death with it
and then ripping a sunbathing pregnant woman's baby out of her womb
and running away with it!). Larry not only has to deal with the rash
of killings, but also the difficult cast and crew of the film,
including diva star Christine (Debbie Rochon; CHAINSAW
CHEERLEADERS - 2008); her white trash boyfriend D.J. (Mario
Diaz); extremely strong boom mike handler Casey (Will Keenan);
special effects technician Jerry (Trent Haaga; THE
GHOULS - 2003); shy gofer Jennifer (Alyce LaTourelle) and
other assorted nitwits,
halfwits and twits who make creating a movie look like a fraternity
toga party gone out of control (and, yes, there's a toga party in
this film!). When soundman The Toddster (Gary Hrbeck) walks off the
film, he is later murdered by the mysterious female killer when she
stabs him repeatedly about his head and chest with a broken bong
(this is after she shoves a funnel up his ass and gives him a bong
water and cocaine enema!) and then ripping out his brains with her
bare hands (and doing a "This is your brain on drugs" PSA
parody). Larry also has a young daughter named Audrey (Lloyd's
real-life daughter Charlotte Kaufman) who was struck dumb when she
witnessed her mother being killed during a stampede at a taping of
The Jerry Springer Show (her mother's head is trampled over and over
until it is just bloody mush). While Larry is trying to finish the
film, whose script gets changed daily, he's also trying to teach
Audrey how to speak again. There's also a competition between Casey
and Jerry for Jennifer's affection, which Casey wins due to his
unusual strength (he keeps beating-up and humiliating Jerry) and his
unusual love of pickles. As the murders continue, including the
killing of the film's financial backer, Jacob Gelman (portly Troma
regular Joel Fleishaker), who is graphically torn apart by an
escalator (!), it becomes clear that Jennifer has a deadly sexual
secret she is hiding from the crew (her sex scene with Jerry is one
for the books). But is she the killer or could it be another
crewmember that has a much more serious problem? Maybe the jar of
pickled red herring is a clue? The entire crew bands together to
defeat the killer in the film's blood-soaked (and painful) finale,
which ends with an impassioned speech about independent filmmaking
that is both inspiring and hilarious. In TERROR
FIRMER, there is no joke so juvenile or sight gag so low
that Lloyd Kaufman won't use it on screen. You want people shitting
their pants in graphic detail? It's in the movie. You want to see a
guy throwing up and then immediately kissing his girlfriend? It's
here. How about jokes about A.I.D.S., shameless self-promotion of
other Troma films, a cameo by Lemmy of Motorhead (C'mon, Lemmy, a
doctor could probably remove that fucking mole! But then he wouldn't
really be Lemmy, would he?), fart, pissing, puking and shitting sight
gags, ventriloquist dummy crucifixion, penis stretching, references
to SEINFELD, JAWS
and too many other TV shows and blockbuster films to take-in in one
viewing? All here. The funny thing is, a lot of this stuff is
actually funny and sometimes side-splittingly so. There is also
plenty of full-frontal nudity on view, both male and female (and
transgendered) and some of it approaches porn level, but it is done
so over-the-top, you can't possibly be offended by it. Yet for all of TERROR
FIRMER's excesses (and there are plenty), Patrick Cassidy,
Douglas Buck and Kaufman's screenplay (inspired by Kaufman and James
Gunn's book, "All I Need To Know About Filmmaking I Learned
From The Toxic Avenger") is still a biting satire on
ultra-low-budget independent filmmaking, including the camaraderie,
in-fighting and unexpected setbacks, and it still finds time to have
a cohesive murder mystery plot. And, surprise, it's not really that
easy to solve; and the rest of the story is linear and resolves most
of the major plot points (including Audrey's speech problem). If it's
a tad overlong at two hours (slightly over two hours if you play the
film with all the excised bits, a special DVD feature), there is so
much going on both in the forefront and the background, time will fly
right by. The gore is plentiful (and very well done), the women are
beautiful and the jokes non-stop. What more could you ask for? Also
starring Yaniv Sharon, Sheri Wenden, Mo Fischer, Lyle Derek, Roy
David, Brigida Costa, and funny cameos by Ron Jeremy, Joe Franklin,
Eli Roth, Tiffany Shepis, Trey Parker and Matt Stone. A Troma
Entertainment DVD Release. Unrated.
TERRORVISION
(1986) - Cult horror comedy from Executive Producer Charles Band
and his late, lamented Empire Pictures production outfit (Band would
form Full Moon Pictures after Empire went belly-up). When the planet
Pluton's Creature Disposal Unit accidentally beams an alien criminal
off the planet, the transmission is picked-up by a newly installed
satellite TV dish ("The Do It Yourself 100") belonging to
the wacky Putterman family, which included dad Stanley (Gerrit
Graham; PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE
- 1974); mom Raquel (Mary Woronov; EATING
RAOUL - 1982); punk rock groupie daughter Suzy (Diane
Franklin; AMITYVILLE
II: THE POSSESSION - 1982); young son Sherman (Chad Allen; DO
YOU WANNA KNOW A SECRET? - 2001); and crazy Grampa (Bert
Remsen; LIES - 1983). When
everyone else is out of the house (Mom and Dad are at a swinger's
party and Suzy is on a date with her punker boyfriend), Grampa and
Sherman watch an all-night monster movie marathon hosted by Medusa
(Jennifer Richards, who wears a wig made of plastic snakes), only to
have a real monster come out of the TV and kill Grampa (by liquefying
him) in front of Sherman's eyes. Sherman calls the police, but they
think it's a crank call and when his
parents come home with another swinging couple (played by Alejandro
Ray and Randi Brooks), Mom locks Sherman in Grampa's fallout shelter
to shut him up (Terrific parenting, Mom!). It's not long before the
monster makes quick meals out of Mom and Dad and the other swinging
couple (Rey's character turns out to be bisexual, but leaning more to
gay!), so Sherman makes another call to the cops and one to Medusa
and when they both blow him off, he blows the door on the fallout
shelter using Grampa's WWII explosives, just as Suzy returns home
with her punk rocker boyfriend O.D. (Jonathan Gries; FRIGHT
NIGHT PART 2 - 1988). The monster attacks, but stops in it's
tracks when it sees O.D.'s studded armband (a flashback shows that it
reminds the monster of it's kind owner back on the planet Pluton), so
Sherman and Suzy don studded armbands, too, and attempt to
domesticate the monster. The trio plan on making a million bucks off
the monster, so Sherman calls Medusa again and Suzy talks her into
coming to the Putterman home to look at the monster. Things go
horribly wrong when Officer Nutky (Ian Patrick Williams) shows up to
arrest Sherman for making crank calls and the monster eats both O.D.
and Nutky. Pluthar (William Paulson), a friendly alien from the
planet Pluthon, beams through the TV screen to save Sherman and Suzy,
but Medusa sees him as competition and kills him, which leads to the
film's bitterly funny conclusion. Let's just say that when Medusa
hosts her next horror marathon, the monsters in the films she will be
showing will pale in comparison to the hostess. This is one of
the better horror comedies to come out of the mid-80's, thanks to
director Ted Nicolaou's (SUBSPECIES
- 1991; BAD CHANNELS -
1992; VAMPIRE JOURNALS
- 1997) funny screenplay, which mocks everything from BOB
& CAROL & TED & ALICE (1969; a funny scene
involving the kids finding the talking severed heads of their parents
and the swinging couple in the bedroom) to E.T.
THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982; What do you feed a starving
monster? Everything!) and our never ending obsession with TV. John
Carl Buechler's life-size creature is a ridiculous concoction of
sharp teeth, big eyes, a huge crab claw and plenty of latex and
slime, but it totally works in the framework of this wacky universe.
Besides a quick shot of the planet Pluton in the beginning of the
film (look closely and you'll see the wrecked remains of STAR
TREK's USS Enterprise in a junkyard), the entire film is set
within the confines of the colorful Putterman home, which includes
one of the biggest indoor hot tubs I have ever seen (It plays an
important part in the death of Alejandro Ray and Randi Brooks). The
sets are a masterwork of primary colors (filmed on stages in Rome,
Italy) and offer every excess the coke-fueled 80's had to offer.
While some of the effects are disgusting, you will notice the total
lack of blood here. When people are killed, they simply dissolve into
a puddle of ooze. Sure, some of the humor seems forced and dated, but
everyone plays it so broadly, it's hard not to fall for it's many
charms (Grampa, who sells lizard tails on the sidewalk, expounds the
eating of the tails by saying, "You cut it off, eat it and it
grows back. And you can eat that one, too!" He may have
something there.). This actually got a theatrical release through
Band's Empire Pictures distribution arm and shortly thereafter
obtained a VHS release from Lightning
Video. (Remember when Band was capable of making entertaining
films and not shit like THE
GINGERDEAD MAN [2005]?). Although TERRORVISION
has yet to receive a DVD release, a nice widescreen print has been
shown on pay cable stations Showtime and Turner Classic Movies
bearing the MGM logo (the print I viewed), so a DVD release in the
near future is not out of the question. Finally available on a
beautiful double-feature Blu-Ray/DVD
Combo Pack (with the extremely weird THE
VIDEO DEAD - 1987) from Scream
Factory. Rated R.
THE
TORTURE CHAMBER OF DR. SADISM
(1967) - This German film quickly became one of my favorite
gothic horror films when I first saw it on TV in the early-'70s.
Thanks to an online friend, I now have ther opportunity to watch it
uncut and in widescreen. I like it more now than I did back then.
This is one of the most atmospheric Eurohorror films ever made in the
'60s and, once you see it, you will notice the influence this film
had on MARK OF THE DEVIL (1970)
in terms of torture, death and, yes, sadism.
Count Frederic Regula (Christopher Lee; HORROR
CASTLE - 1963) is drawn and quartered for sacrificing twelve
young female virgins (He is fitted with a spiked mask [the spikes are
on the inside!] so he suffers before he dies), but before he
loses all four of his limbs, he curses Roger von Marienberg (Lex
Barker; THE INVISIBLE DR. MABUSE
- 1962) and all his descendants for sentencing him to such a gruesome death.
Thirty-five years pass and stranger Roger Mont Elise (Barker again)
arrives in a village and gets the attention of a one-legged man, who
was at Count Regula's drawn-and-quartering and is giving the
villagers a history of Count Regula (he performs in a traveling
show). He delivers a personal written invitation to Robert from
"Graf von Andomai", to meet him at his castle on Friday.
The message also goes on to state that von Andomai will tell him
about his family line. Roger is intrigued because, even though he is
rich, he doesn't have an idea who he is, as he never met his mother
or father and knows nothing about his family line. Robert tells his
coachman (Dieter Eppler) to head to the castle. They arrive in the
village square where Count Regula was killed, but they are lost.
Robert asks several villagers for directions to the castle and all of
them turn away scared, not saying a word. Roger then meets priest
Father Fabian (Vladimir Medar; CASTLE
OF THE CREEPING FLESH - 1968), who offers Robert directions
if he can come along for the ride, because he has a baptism to
perform on a young boy along the way. Robert agrees and they go on
their way, but not before they witness a strange ritual to ward off
evil, where an old man walks through the village dragging a huge
wooden crucifix (much in the same way Christ did before he was
crucified). While making the long trip, Roger and Father Fabian meet
Baroness Lilian von Brabant (Karin
Dor; ASSIGNMENT
TERROR - 1969) and her charge Babette (Christiane
Rücker). Lillian (who likes to be called Lily, so I will, too)
has also received a written invitation to the castle from the
one-legged man, only her message states that Graf von Andomai will
tell her about the inheritance she is about to recieve, since her
parents recently passed away under mysterious circumstances. What
happens next cements this film as one of the most atmospheric horror
flicks of all time. As night approaches, the Coachman sees the
strangest forest in film history. Every tree has human body parts
protruding from it, as if the trees swallowed people whole, growing
around them (Once seen, never forgotten).
The Coachman tells Roger that he wants to turn around, but he orders
him to proceed forward. The Coachman then has a heart attack and
dies, falling off the carriage, frightened to death from what he has
just seen. Lily and Babette are then kidnapped by the castle's butler
Anatol (Carl Lange; CREATURE
WITH THE BLUE HAND - 1967) and when Robert and Father Fabian
get to the castle, they find Lily in a trance and Babette hanging
over a pit, where the bottom is full of spikes. Father Fabian frees
Babette and Anatol tells Robert that he saved the women from highway
robbers (not even trying to explain Babette's predicament!). Anatol
tells Robert that Count Regula will see him tonight (Robert:
"The Count has been dead for thirty-five years!" Anatol:
"He will rise from the dead to talk to you!"). We then find
out that Father Fabian is not a priest at all, he is a thief that was
looking to rob the castle, but he will have to put that on hold for
the moment, since everyone's lives are in deadly danger. Anatol, who
proves to Father Fabian that he is one of the living dead (Father
Fabian puts a bullet in his chest and we see the bullet hole heal by
itself, thanks to some nifty stop-motion animation), shows everyone
the drawn and quartered corpse of Count Regula in a glass coffin,
telling them that the Count will rise from the dead on Good Friday,
which is today. The Count then rises from the dead and everyone
watches his dismembered limbs reattach themselves to his body (more
stop-motion animation). Count Regula tells Lily and Roger that he
needed the blood of thirteen virgins to become immortal, but he was
killed before he could kill his thirteenth virgin. Since he drank the
blood of the twelve virgins he killed before he was drawn and
quartered, he only needs one more and that person is...Lily. The
Count tells Lily that she is related to Roger and at midnight he will
drink her blood. Roger tries to intervene, but he is gassed, waking
up tied to the floor while the sharp blade of a huge pendulum inches
closer to his torso on every swing (the opening credits say the film
is based on Edgar Allan Poe's 'The Pit And The Pendulum", but
only this sequence bears any similarity). Will Roger escape this
deadly trap and save Lily, who is trying to save him, but is caught
in another trap, where the floor is disappearing under her, a pit of
snakes beneath her? Will Count Regula get his vengeance on Roger and
Lily's family and become immortal?
What shocks me the most in watching this film for the first time in
widescreen is how much visual information was lost on the fullscreen
versions, especially the memorable trip through the haunted forest.
Director Harald Reinl (he was married to Karin Dor when this film was
made), who is best known for the series of German Edgar Wallace films
he directed during the early-to-mid-'60s (THE
CARPET OF HORROR - 1962; THE
STRANGLER OF BLACKMOOR CASTLE - 1963, just to name a
couple), many of them featuring Karin Dor and/or Lex Barker, before
hitting paydirt in the U.S. with the pseudo-documentary CHARIOTS
OF THE GODS (1970) and the "family" Jack London
adventure CRY OF THE
BLACK WOLVES (1972; if your idea of "family"
entertainment is a young boy who is about to be hanged!), hits this
film out of the park, hardly ever delivering a false note. While not
particularly bloody (pay attention to how Reinl handles the Count
being drawn and quartered), this film still has many grotesque
sights, including the trek through the forest and Robert discovering
the one-legged man's dead body in the castle's barn. There's also no
nudity (this was 1967, after all), but it comes damn close, showing
the naked, dead bodies of the twelve virgins, all their breasts (and
other private parts) hidden by objects or by the way their bodies are
posed (I froze the DVD on this scene to see if Reinl tried to sneak
in some nudity but, no, all of their naked bodies were placed in
strategic positions. It must have taken a lot of planning to film
this sequence, because the camera is always moving.). It's the little
things like this, that most people wouldn't notice, that makes this
film so special to me (and makes people believe they saw more than
there really was to see!). Lex Barker (who passed away in 1973) is
his normal stiff self, but he makes a serviceable action hero (he
once played Tarzan in a series of films during the late-'40s &
early-'50s). One thing about this film did bother me, though: If Lily
is related to Roger, why does he give her a long passionate kiss in
the finale? It's definitely not a kiss an uncle would give his niece!
I guess that is a subject for another film (such as BYLETH:
THE DEMON OF INCEST - 1972).
Originally shot as DIE
SCHLANGENGRUBE UND DAS PENDEL ("The Snakepit And The
Pendulum"), this received a U.S. theatrical release (from
Hemisphere Pictures) under the name BLOOD
DEMON, as part of a double feature with the Filipino horror
film THE MAD DOCTOR
OF BLOOD ISLAND (1968). It had many VHS releases (by labels
such as Regal Video,
Magnum Entertainment,
Sun Video and Interglobal
Home Video) under a variety of titles, including the review
title, BLOOD
OF THE VIRGINS and CASTLE
OF THE WALKING DEAD, most of them being the edited TV cut
(But I swear, the first time I saw it on WOR-TV's [Channel 9 in
N.Y.C.] "Fright Night", it was unedited, but further
showings were hacked to pieces, missing much of the forest scene,
stripping the film of what it is famous for). This film has yet to
get a legal disc release in the States, which surprises me, because
it is bound to be a best seller (are you listening Code Red?). Johnny
Legend once tried to release a widescreeen version on DVD, but he
quickly had to pull it for legal reasons (even though it was in
widescreen, it was the edited version). Until that day comes, I wish
to thank my friend (You know who you are. The only reason I am not
naming you is because I don't want you getting emails asking for a
copy!) for sending me the German DVD (from label e-m-s), which is
available English dubbed (but not English subtitled). Not Rated.
TROPIC
OF CANCER (1972) - This is
a real strange one, folks. Part giallo mystery, part horror flick and
part mondo travelogue, this Haiti-lensed film offers a lot of good
stuff for fans of Italian genre movies; namely, plenty of
full-frontal nudity (By both men and woman. The only time I have seen
more penises is when I mistakenly rented a gay porn film!), plenty of
bloody, gory deaths (there is one murder that is so graphic, you will
not forget it as long as you live) and, unfortunately, real life
animal slaughter disguised as a way of life for Haiti's voodoo
community. There's also a major character in this film that is quite
unlike any
other in Italian genre films. He's another aspect of this film that
makes it unforgettable. It's really hard to explain what is
going on here, but I will do my best to describe it to you.
Fred Wright (Gabriele Tinti; DEATH
OCCURRED LAST NIGHT - 1970) and his beautiful wife Grace
(Anita Strindberg; WHO SAW HER DIE?
- 1972) land in Port Au Prince, Haiti under the guise of going on
vacation and working on their troubled marriage. It's obvious Fred is
there for another reason, but I'll get to that later. Fred is a real
hothead, a man who gets angry at the drop of a hat, even over little
things such as blocks of ice falling off a truck as he and his wife
arrive at their hotel, the El Rancho (Okay, I guess that is not a
little thing, but he yells to the driver of the truck, "You
should be shot for your stupidity!"). While Fred is yelling at
the driver, Grace looks at him with lust in her eyes (She has a thing
for black men, which will be revealed in an eye-opening sequence
later in the film). Also at the hotel is Garner (Stelio Candelli; THE
KILLER WORE GLOVES - 1974), who is in Haiti for the same
reason as Fred, but neither one of them knows it.
We are then introduced to Dr. Williams (Anthony Steffen; THE
NIGHT EVELYN CAME OUT OF THE GRAVE - 1971), a brilliant
scientist who invented a new hallucinogenic aphrodisiac that will
make millions for anyone who owns the formula, but there is a major
problem. Two of Dr. Williams' assistants stole the formula four weeks
ago and disappeared. Without the formula, Williams cannot create any
more of the drug, but he doesn't seem too worried, because he is
content being a doctor at a local hospital who takes care of his
patients. The locals love him, as do the police. He is going to need
that love because someone wearing black gloves is killing everyone
Dr. Williams knows and he may very well be next. We first see
Williams in his office at home, when he gets a phone call from one of
his missing assistants, Douglas, who sounds overwrought, begging
Williams to meet him immediately, even offering to give the formula
back. When Williams leaves his home to meet Douglas, we can see he
was not alone in his house; also inside is the black-gloved killer,
who rifles through Dr Williams' office looking for something and not
finding it. Care to guess what that is? (Dr. Williams' office is full
of dead spiders, which are kept pinned behind glass-encased frames
like someone's bug collection.) When Williams arrives at the location
to meet Douglas, he seems not to be there, not answering Williams'
call for him. Williams searches the place and finds Douglas dead, his
skin as white as snow.
We are then introduced to the obese white-haired Mr. Peacock (Gordon
Felio; DO YOU LIKE WOMEN?
- 1964; a cannibal comedy written by Roman Polanski!), an obviously
gay man who is sitting by the edge of the hotel's pool, while his
personal "assistant", Jean-Paul (Pierre Richard Merceron)
rubs suntan lotion on his back (Once you see Peacock, you will never
forget him, I was going to describe him as looking like a Cabbage
Patch Doll until my friend Steve mentioned that he is a dead
ringer for the kid in BAD SANTA
[2003] if he were all grown up. Truer words were never spoken!). Mr.
Peacock then jumps in the pool with some naked cabana boys and an
equally naked Jean-Paul, telling them to join him before the water
gets too warm (The blocks of ice we saw earlier in the film are put
in the pool to cool down the water in Haiti's sweltering heat!).
Later in his office, Mr. Peacock talks to Garner, telling him that
his proposition is "delightful", but it won't be easy to
convince Williams because he's a very strange man. "His idealism
is like an affliction", says Peacock. He tells Garner that
Williams is very kind and quite committed to his work as a doctor; he
once cured one of his "beauties" (Peacock lives up to his
name because his "beauties" are his collection of living
peacocks he keeps as pets. One is by his side as he talks to
Garner!), so he sent Williams a stuffed peacock out of gratitude.
"He saves birds, animals and children", says Peacock.
Garner says he will put the pressure on Williams; "My clients
will be happy to let us handle this in our own way." His clients
want their hands on the "merchandise" as soon as possible,
telling Peacock that they may get anxious if it takes too long.
Peacock says he understands, "But a matter of this magnitude
needs both time and tact." Garner is worried that someone else
may be after the formula and stealing it away from his clients.
Peacock assures him not to worry, he understands this country and
knows how to handle Williams. Garner says a hallucinogen with those
potentials is money in the bank; the market is ready and waiting. He
promises Peacock that his take will be more than enough, so he is
counting on him to deliver the formula.
Dr. Williams is in the crowd at a cockfight, when he notices a drug
dealer named Oca (Fred Ade) in the audience staring at him intensely.
When they lock eyes. Oca leaves the cockfight quickly, with Williams
chasing him close behind. Oca runs in to a disco, grabs a woman
and dances with her, his face buried in her shoulder. Williams then
grabs him, punches him in the face and demands to know where his
second missing assistant, Crotz (Richard Osborne), is. After a few
more punches to his face, Oca runs away and hides in a cabana where a
naked couple is making love. When Williams opens the door, Oca tries
to stab him with a switchblade, but Williams disarms him and once
again asks where Crotz is. Oca tells him where he can find Crotz and
also says that Crotz is meeting someone tonight, but he doesn't know who.
Fred and Grace are driving down a busy Port Au prince road when Fred
mentions that he wants to visit his old friend, Dr. Williams, telling
Grace that he is a doctor, biologist and a philosopher "but he's
kind of a has-been." Williams let fantastic opportunities slip
out of his hands and he's happy having nothing (That's not a
has-been, that's a content man!). Fred and Grace drive to
Williams' house only to discover his home is huge and foreboding,
like a haunted house (Grace says, "It looks like something out
of Charles Addams!"). When Fred rings the doorbell and no one
answers, they go on their way. Grace has no idea that her husband is
also after the formula and he is willing to do anything, even
sacrifice her well being to get it. When their car is rear-ended by
another car, Fred goes into one of his fits, but Dr. Williams
suddenly appears to calm him down. Grace invites him to have dinner
with them tonight and he agrees. As they drive away, the Police
Inspector (Bob Lemoine) pulls up to Williams in his car and tells him
that they found Douglas, dead. Williams plays stupid, even when the
Inspector tells him that there was something strange about the
condition of Douglas' corpse. It's as if the body contained water
rather than blood. Williams wryly says, "We call that an anemic
condition" and the Inspector smiles, telling him if he hears
anything from Crotz to give him a call, then he drives away.
Williams, Fred and Grace are about to have drinks at the pool, when
Garner, who is at the pool, yells out that he was just bitten by a
spider (It's apparent Garner did deep background on Williams and
knows about his years studying spiders, even being ballsy enough to
purposely getting bitten by a very poisonous spider just to get close
to Williams!). Williams runs up to him, sees the spider that bit him
and pulls out a syringe out of his medical bag, while the hotel's
manager, Mr. Philips (Umberto Raho; THE
FLOWER WITH THE DEADLY STING - 1973), captures the spider.
Williams inserts the syringe into the spider's mouth and sucks out
the venom (shown in extreme close-up), which he then injects into
Garner. Within a few moments Garner is feeling better and to show his
(fake) gratitude, he invites Williams, Fred and Grace to join him and
Mr. Peacock for dinner, which they gladly accept. At the dinner table
in the hotel's restaurant, Williams explains how he studied spiders
for many years, but quit when it became "too dangerous for my
line of work." A friend of Garner's, Mr. Pratt (Alfio Nicolosi),
stops by the table to invite everyone over to his table after dinner
for champagne. As he walks back to his table, Williams give Mr. Pratt
a long, angry stare. Grace then mentions that she is fascinated by
voodoo, so Williams gives everyone at the table a history lesson on
the subject, likening voodoo to Catholicism (or, rather,
anti-Catholicism). Williams then sees a man sitting alone at a table
and excuses himself, walking to the front desk an telling them to
page a person (We can't hear the person's name because someone at the
front desk is stepping on his dialogue; and, as we will find out
later, this was done purposely). Williams then walks outside and
waits for the man to appear, but when he doesn't, Williams walks back
inside and finds the man's dead body hidden behind some plants. Also
on the body is a strange-looking small wooden object (it looks like
an eye), so Williams pockets it and walks back to the table, telling
no one about the dead body. Grace begs Williams to take her to a
voodoo ritual, so everyone gets up from the table to join Grace while
Williams takes them all to a genuine voodoo ritual.
Once at the ritual, they see a bunch of topless native women dancing
in a circle around the sacrifice - a bull. When the (quite sexual)
dance is over (It is obvious by they way their breasts flop around
that none of their titties are fake or augmented!), the voodoo priest
stabs the bull in the back of its neck with a sharp dagger. When the
bull falls to the ground, the priest then slits the bull's throat and
collects the gushing blood in a bowl, which everyone will take a
drink of. The priest then cuts off the bull's penis and throws it on
the bull's dead body, as the women fight over it, taking bites and
eating it! (If you get queasy by real-life animal deaths, I
recommend you don't watch this sequence, as it is pretty graphic).
The women then go into a frenzy, falling to the ground and twitching
wildly, as if they were having a grand mal seizure. Then all the men
dance in a circle around the dead bull, but one of the men happens to
be Oca, who then falls to the ground, dead. Williams tells Fred to
get a knife and Williams then cuts Oca's leg open, telling Fred that
there's not any blood coming out of the wound, just a water-like
substance. Fred asks how that could be and Williams says, "Who
knows the answer? Whenever a man tries to go beyond the accepted
limits, the spirits punish him." Williams is obviously lying,
because he realizes that Oca was using his new wonder drug, just like
Douglas was. Both of their bodies lack blood, but where did Oca get
the drug? When Williams goes home, he is attacked by Mr. Pratt's
"assistant", Murdock (actor unknown). Sitting on a chair is
Mr. Pratt, who says, "I'm sorry I had to hurt you Doctor. I
never use these methods because I'm a businessman." When
Williams tells him they have no business to talk about, Murdock gives
him a couple of kick to his ribs and then beats the crap out of him.
When Williams still refuses to do business with him, Mr. Pratt gives
him 48 hours to change his mind or else he is a dead man. While
Williams is doing rounds in the hospital, Mr. Peacock tells him that
a friend of his, a representative from an important chemical firm,
has come all the way from Boston to talk to him. Williams tells
Peacock that he is not interested, because "at the present I'm
only interested in being a doctor." Peacock says he sees no
wrong in profiting from the fruits of his labors and Williams is
steadfast (That's what I like about him!), telling Peacock once again
that he's not interested, even when Peacock makes a veiled threat to
expose the condition of Douglas' body. The biggest problem I have is
this: Why is everyone after this new miracle drug when it's apparent
it has very deadly side effects? It's a fair question, one I hope is
answered before the film concludes.
Peacock goes back to his opulent home and tells a waiting Garner
that Williams won't cooperate. Peacock has the feeling that Williams
wants to protect someone, even himself. Garner believes it a bluff
and that someone else has gotten to Williams. Garner believes that
whoever finds Crotz will get the formula (he's not as stupid as he
looks). Garner tells Peacock to find Crotz and he will deal with
Williams. Garner's way of "dealing" with Williams is to try
to run him over with his car (!), but Williams eludes him and Garner
chases him down the dirt roads of Port Au Prince until he gets to a
busy marketplace, forcing him to get out of the car and chase
Williams on foot, but Williams is too fast and gets away. Fred and
Grace are at another busy marketplace, when Fred disappears. Williams
suddenly appears (he has a nasty knack for doing that!) and Grace
tells him that Fred has been acting strange lately, so Williams goes
looking for him with no luck. Grace wants Williams to take her back
to her hotel, but he has to make one stop first, a slaughterhouse,
where he has to inspect the meat to certify it is safe to eat
(Williams is a man of many talents). He leaves Grace alone to do his
inspection, while a worker gives her a tour of the slaughterhouse,
where she sees live steer being slaughtered (suddenly the voodoo
sacrifice doesn't seem inhumane after all!). Grace watches the slabs
of meat passing her by on hooks when she sees the dead body of
Murdock hanging on one of the meat hooks and screams. When Mr. Pratt
is talking to the Inspector at the police station, we learn that
Murdock was strangled before he was hung on the hook. Mr. Pratt
orders the Inspector to find out who killed his beloved
'secretary" (Wait a minute. I thought Murdock was his
"assistant"?). The Inspector tells Mr. Pratt that he knows
Murdock was his bodyguard, not his secretary, telling him to watch
his step while he's in this country, otherwise he will be arrested.
When Mr. Pratt is in his hotel room packing, the black-gloved sneaks
into his room and strangles him with a garrote.
Robin (Kathryn Witt; THE
DEMON OF PARADISE - 1987), the girl behind the front desk of
the hotel, walks into the office of her boss, Mr. Philips, and
overhears a conversation he is having with the Inspector over the
phone. The Inspector wants Philips to do a private investigation of
the guests at his hotel and Philips refuses, telling the Inspector he
owns a lot of businesses on this island and investigating his guests
or employees is bad for business, so he tells it inspector no, he
won't do it. We then discover that Robin is having an affair with Mr.
Philips. She is also sleeping with the Inspector!
Grace is in her room about to take a shower (full-frontal nudity
alert!) when a bellboy delivers her a bouquet of flowers. She smells
the flowers, not knowing that they have been laced with a
hallucinogen. Williams catches Fred rummaging through his office and
floors him with a punch to the face. Fred tells him he has a
proposition, but Williams says no deal, telling him to get the hell
out of the country, he's already in serious trouble. When Fred
leaves, Williams gets a phone call from Grace, telling him to come to
her room immediately. Grace is on an acid trip and what happens next
is the definition of "trippy". She sees a bunch of spiders
crawling on her bed and then she's in a never-ending red corridor,
where naked Haitian men are motioning for her (I've never seen so
many "franks 'n beans" in an Italian genre film. Even
Gabriele Tinti has a full-frontal scene! This sequence alone would
garner it an X or NC-17 Rating from the MPAA.) The scene ends with
her in the arms of the naked ice truck driver and they make love,
while Mr. Peacock (who is, thankfully, not naked) laughs at them. A
tripping Grace leaves her room and gets into her car, but Williams
stops her before she can drive away.
Garner accuses Peacock of pulling a double-cross and threatens his
life. Fred accuses Grace of screwing Williams. Grace accuses Fred of
only thinking about himself. As we can see, everyone's lives are
falling apart, but that's the least of their worries. At least they
have their lives...for now. There's still a killer on the loose.
Peacock gets a phone call from a man saying he is Crotz, who tells
him he wants to meet. Crotz tells him he has the formula and he will
give it to him for $70,000. Peacock agrees and goes to the arranged
meeting place with the money, but Crotz doesn't show up. The
black-gloved killer does and shoots a speargun bolt into Peacock's
chest and finishes him off by stepping on his head while he lies in a
mud puddle, drowning him in a few inches of water. But it's the next
murder you will never forget, just for its sheer brutality. Garner is
in a rum factory, when someone sprays him in the face with some
caustic substance, the skin on this face and hands melting and
falling to the ground. As Garner screams in pain, the killer throws
him on a conveyor belt, where he is dropped into an industrial sugar
cane grinder. As Garner tries to get out of the machine, the killer
uses a metal pipe to beat Garner's acid-scarred hands (It is almost
too brutal to watch!), before turning on the machine and grinding
Garner into a fine bloody mist.
Williams takes Grace to the rum factory for a tour and we find out
it is one of the many business that Mr. Philips owns. Grace and
William tour the factory on their own when something catches
Williams' eye. An old wood carving on one of the machines is
missing a piece (an eye), the same object he found on the dead body
in the restaurant. He puts the missing piece where it belongs and
someone tries to kill him by dropping a barrel of rum on him from the
second floor. Williams runs upstairs hoping to catch the person, but
he gets away. Then Williams does the unthinkable; he takes Grace back
to his place and makes love to her, not knowing that Fred is watching
them through a window. Remember the stuffed peacock that Mr. Peacock
gave to Williams? Well. Fred sees that Williams uses it as a secret
hiding place, watching as he places a small black journal into a
hidden drawer. Could it be that Williams had the formula the
entire time? I'm not going to tell you. You are going to have to
watch this film to get the answers to the many questions you now
have, but I won't be giving too much away by telling you that the
dead body Williams found in the restaurant was actually Crotz. Think
about that for a minute and read the review again. Think you know who
the killer is? All I will tell you is the name of the killer is in
this review, so good luck!
This wild film was directed and co-written by two people.
"Edward G. Muller" is actually Edoardo Mulargia, ho also
gave us the Spaghetti Westerns DON'T
WAIT DJANGO...SHOOT!
(1967), PRAY TO
GOD AND DIG YOUR GRAVE (1968) and VIVA!
DJANGO (1971), as well as the women-in-prison (WIP) flicks ESCAPE
FROM HELL (1980) and HOTEL
PARADISE (1980), which were edited together by Charles Band
and released (with new footage containing Linda Blair) in 1985 as SAVAGE
ISLAND. The other director/co-screenwriter was Giam Paolo
Lomi, who had a very small film credits list, the only film that
would interest readers of this site is FAREWELL
UNCLE TOM (1971), on which he was an Assistant Director and
Production Manager. Helping with the screenplay was star Antonio
Steffen, who is credited by his real name, Antonio de Teffe. Steffen
also wrote or co-wrote the screenplays to other films he starred in,
such as THE
STRANGER'S GUNDOWN (1969), SHANGO
(1970; also directed by Mulargia) and THE
KILLER WITH A THOUSAND EYES
(1973), all using his given name. This film is helped immensely by
the on-location Haiti photography. You can almost feel the sweltering
heat that seems to infect every frame, especially when it comes to
the obese Mr. Peacock, who sweats everywhere, even in air-conditioned
rooms. Mr. Peacock actor Gordon Felio is so unlike any actor you have
ever seen,
your eyes will be glued to the screen in every scene he is in. Let's
not forget the lovely Anita Strindberg. She is a beautiful woman in
or out of her clothes, but she spends equal time doing both. This is
a highly sexual film, full of nudity and the male nudity surprisingly
takes up more screen time than the female nudity, something very
unusual for an Italian genre film, but it does give the film an
eerie, sexually-charged glow, especially the lone black man who
stares at Grace at the beginning and end of the film, book-casing
Grace's love of men of color. Even when she is tripping, her
hallucinations put her in the arms of black men. It is never
explained, but it really doesn't need an explanation. It's just
entertaining, erotic and highly watchable. Also helping the film is
Piero Umiliani's effective music score, full of heavy drumbeats
during the voodoo rituals and some orchestral tunes during the
killer's stalking and striking. He also supplied the scores to Lucio
Fulci's OH! THOSE
MOST SECRET AGENTS! (1964), as well as ARGOMAN
THE FANTASTIC SUPERMAN (1967), Mario Bava's FIVE
DOLLS FOR AN AUGUST MOON (1970) and BLACK
COBRA WOMAN (1976). The finale of the film takes place
during a voodoo wedding ceremony, where the bride and groom are tied
nude to the ground facing the dirt while people throw water on their
naked asses. When the killer interrupts the ceremony, the villagers
kill him in a way that can best be described as fiery. I had trouble
keeping up with the finale and had to watch it three time to make
sense of it, but people smarter than me should have no problem with
it. There are double and triple-crosses, a chase through a field of
harvested sugar cane and a few unexpected deaths, making this film a
delight for giallo and mystery fans alike. So what are you waiting
for? One other thing: It is never explained why anyone would want
this new drug, as it seems to kill anyone who uses it!
Filmed as AL
TROPICO DEL CANCRO (a literal translation of the review
title), subtitled (PEACOCK'S
PLACE), and also known as DEATH
IN HAITI, this film never had a theatrical or home video
release in the United States in any format. It is available streaming
on YouTube from user "Giallo Realm", in a nice widescreen,
English dubbed print, but I would advise you to watch it as soon as
possible because this user always ends up in "YouTube Jail"
for showing licensed films without permission. I love this user
because he has so many great and unusual films to offer fans of
Italian genre cinema, but the last time he spent over three months in
"jail" and I fear the next time it happens, he won't be
allowed to come back. Such is the life on YouTube. This film is Not
Rated for many obvious reasons.
THE
VENGEANCE OF LADY MORGAN (1965) -
In Scotland, Lady Susan Blackhouse (Barbara Nelli; BLOODY
PIT OF HORROR - 1965) is madly in love with architect Pierre
Brissac (Michel Forain), but he is not in the same social class as
Susan. She doesn't care and tells Pierre she loves only him, even
though Sir Harald Morgan (Paul Muller; NIGHTMARE
CASTLE - 1965) has loved her since childhood and expects to
take her hand in marriage. When Pierre gets a message that he is
needed in Paris, Susan tells him that she is going to tell her uncle,
Sir Neville Blackhouse (Carlo Kechler; THE
GHOST - 1963), that she loves only him and wants to marry
him. With Harald sitting between them, Susan tells her Uncle that
she's madly in love with Pierre and wants to be his wife,
apologizing to Harald, telling him she loves him like a sister loves
a brother (Ouch!). When Pierre takes a boat to Paris, someone sneaks
up behind him, knocks him out and tosses him overboard. Pierre is
reported missing and presumed dead, the police believing he
accidently fell overboard and drowned. Heartbroken, Susan agrees to
marry Sir Harald Morgan (She and Sir Neville are the only Blackhouses
alive and Sir Neville would like Susan to produce some children to
keep the bloodline alive), but only if she can leave with her Uncle
directly after the marriage ceremony to spend three months alone to
collect her thoughts and grieve internally, Susan promising Harald
that when she returns, she will be an obedient wife. Harald agrees
and they get married, Susan leaving with Sir Neville for three
months, not knowing that Pierre is actually alive in a hospital. He
was rescued by a passing boat, but the hit he took in the back of his
head caused him a severe case of amnesia, unable to even tell the
doctor his own name.
When the three months are up, Susan returns to Castle Blackhouse,
only to discover that Harald has dismissed all her longtime servants,
except for one, Terry (Edith MacGoven), and replaced them with scary
butler Roger (Gordon Mitchell; THE
SKIN UNDER THE CLAWS - 1975) and creepy housekeeper Lillian
(Erika Blanc; THE THIRD EYE
- 1966). It's apparent from the start that Harald, with the help of
Roger, Lillian and a reticent Terry, are trying to drive Susan insane
to inherit her fortune and take over the castle. Lillian hypnotizes
Susan at night when she goes to sleep, making her do and see things
that scare the crap out of her (such as placing a snake in Susan's
bed and then showing her it's nothing but a canopy bed cord). Roger
does his best to make Susan believe she is seeing things, such as
when he fakes pouring wine in her glass a dinner time and telling her
she drank it when she sees that her glass is empty (Good help is hard
to find!). After a few instances of making Susan display erratic
behavior, Harald has a Doctor (Luciano Catenacci; KILL,
BABY...KILL! - 1966) examine Susan, the Doctor telling
Harald he has no idea what is wrong with Susan. Harald tells the
Doctor that he was expecting a more "precise" diagnosis,
the Doctor saying to him, "I'm a doctor, not a magician."
Harald apologizes, saying it's his wife's condition that makes him
forget his manners (Harald puts on a good show feigning that he cares
for Susan, I'll give him that). The Doctor says that Susan's symptoms
are very strange and contradictory. Susan's state is abnormal, her
mind is lost, her pupils dilated and she has an absent gaze. He
doesn't know what is wrong with her; he's never seen it before. He
tells Harald that Susan was hallucinating and hearing voices. She
thinks she is insane. Harald asks the Doctor if he thinks his wife is
insane and he says, "As long as she is able to say she's insane,
she isn't." Harald then says, "But could she be?" and
the Doctor replies, "Let's hope not." The Doctor says he
will return in a few days when Susan's symptoms will either have
worsened or disappeared. Harald asks if he can see Susan and the
Doctor says no, she's in a state of shock, but he's sure she will
recover soon enough. Harald says he will take his advice, but he
would like to be near her as much as possible (I bet he would!). As
the Doctor is walking out the castle's (very small) front door
(everyone has to duck their head when they walk through it!), he asks
Harald where Sir Neville Blackhouse is. When Harald asks why, the
Doctor says Susan wants to see him. Susan gave him a letter to give
to Sir Neville. When Harald asks to see the letter, the Doctor says
no, that will be unethical, but he'll make sure Sir Neville gets the letter.
That night, Susan looks out her bedroom window and sees Sir
Neville's carriage pulling up to the castle. Excited, Susan runs
outside in the pouring rain to greet him, but the carriage is no
longer there. Lillian pulls Susan inside and Harald tells her that
Sir Neville is not here, she's seeing things. When Roger walks in
from the pouring rain, Harald tells him to contact the Doctor, Susan
is now insane. While sitting alone in a room with Harald, Susan hears
a man's scream coming from outside, Harald nervously telling her it
is just the wind from an approaching storm. When Lillian puts Susan
to bed, Susan tells her that she was sure it was a man's scream, but
Lillian tells her Sir Harald was right, it was nothing but the wind.
We then discover that Lillian and Sir Harald are lovers and have been
for some time. Susan is awoken by the screams and sneaks outside,
following the screams past the castle's cemetery and into the
castle's dungeon, where Susan discovers Roger mercilessly whipping
Sir Neville, who is chained to a wall, Roger laughing like a maniac.
Sir Neville begs Roger, "What have you done to my little
Susan?", Roger replying, "Lady Susan is subject to our most
devoted attention!" Sir Neville screams out,
"Murderers!" and Roger begins whipping and kicking him some
more. Susan passes out after witnessing the brutality and we then
watch Harald and Lillian in bed, Harald telling her that in a few
days, perhaps in a few hours, she will be one of the masters of this
castle. Roger then enters the room, surprised and angry to see
Lillian in bed with Harald. He tells Harald that Susan saw him
whipping Sir Neville and now she knows everything, but she fainted
and he carried her back to her bedroom. A furious Harald (Who says to
Roger, "Since when do you enter a room without knocking?")
says he will take care of Susan, leaving the room, telling Roger to
"take care" of Sir Neville.
When Susan wakes up, Harald is sitting on the bed, staring at her.
She tells him that she saw Roger whipping and hitting her Uncle, so
Harald tells her to take him where she saw it happen, but, of course,
Sir Neville is no longer there (We see Roger with his hand over Sir
Neville's mouth, hiding in another room in the dungeon). Harald takes
Susan back to her bedroom, where later that night, Lillian hypnotizes
her, just as the Doctor arrives, Harald telling him that his wife had
a relapse and she's getting worse every day. Lillian leads Susan to
the castle's roof, orders her to stand on a ledge and tells her she
can't move a muscle. Lillian then runs downstairs and tells the
Doctor that Susan is on the roof, threatening to jump. They all hurry
to the roof, where Harald yells out Susan's name, breaking the trance
and making Susan lose her balance, plummeting off the roof to her
death on the rock below. Susan's final word is "Pierre" and
Pierre actually hears her from his hospital bed, calling out Susan's
name. Like all good Gothic horror films, revenge is a dish best
served when you're a ghost hellbent on revenge to those who have
wronged you.
Susan calling out his name has made Pierre regain his memory,
telling his doctor his name and that he must go to Scotland because
Susan Blackhouse is probably worried about him. When Pierre arrives
at Castle Blackhouse, he finds it deserted and in a state of
disarray, sheets covering all the furniture. Suddenly, Susan appears
and tells Pierre that she was expecting him to come and that
"coldness surrounded me" waiting for his arrival. After
they make love, Susan tells Pierre she is dead, but he has a hard
time believing her, that is until she tells him the entire story
about how she got even with Harald's deadly treachery (Cue the
long flashback!). Life is not so rosy for Harald, Lillian, Roger
or Terry, as they discover that Pierre is alive and could spoil their
plans. Harald turns out to be a lying prick, reneging on his deal to
make Roger a master of the castle. It turns out Roger and Lillian are
lovers and plan to kill Harald when the time is right. Harald doesn't
trust Terry, believing she will talk to police, so he threatens her,
saying if she doesn't keep her mouth shut, she will end up like Susan
(This comes right after Roger nearly rapes Terry!). Strange things
begin happening at the castle, like candles blowing out when all the
windows are closed and relighting by themselves, furniture moving on
its own, a vase exploding and acid being pit in Roger's bottle of
bourbon, forcing Roger to go off the deep end and stabbing Terry to
death when he thinks she is Susan's ghost. Susan also turns Harald
against Lillian, putting Roger's boots at the foot of her bed, so
Harald strangles Lillian with his bare hands. He and Roger bury
Lillian's body in the cemetery after Harald agrees to make Roger a
master of the castle, but they still don't trust each other. Harald
tries to poison Roger's drink, but Roger catches on and chases Harald
outside and inside the castle, where they meet on the castle roof,
Roger putting Harald in a spinning fireman's carry and tossing him
off the roof (even though it's not meant to be humorous, I must admit
that I laughed out loud when I saw an obvious dummy being thrown off
the roof). Immediately as Roger walks outside, Susan appears on a
horse and the horse stomps and kicks Roger in the head over and over
until his face is nothing but hamburger (if you freeze the film at a
certain frame, you can see Roger's right eye is hanging out of its
socket!). Now everyone in the castle is dead (End of long flashback!).
Pierre still has a hard time believing Susan is a ghost until she
tells him to hug her and his arms go right through her. "Do you
believe me now?", asks Susan, disappearing and re-appearing on
the bed, telling Pierre that he can touch her now. "Kiss me,
kisse me for the last time", says Susan and Pierre does. Pierre
says he wants to be with Susan forever, but Susan says, "Go,
Pierre, they're drinking blood. So you will be in danger. They appear
every night, human blood nourishes them. That's why they kept Uncle
Neville alive." Pierre realizes Sir Neville is still alive and
rushes to the dungeon to save him, ignoring Susan's objections. We
then see the ghosts of Harald, Lillian, Roger and Terry walking up to
a chained Sir Neville, who is close to death, each of them taking
turns sucking the blood out of his body. When Terry takes her turn
(she's last, of course), Sir Neville dies and Harald says it is over
for them, they have no more blood to drink. Pierre appears in the
dungeon and the four ghosts realize
that his body can give them the blood they need to survive, so they
try to subdue him by caving the roof of the dungeon in, but Susan
saves him. The evil ghosts don't give up, cornering Pierre in the
castle, but Susan cuts Pierre's hand and his blood drips on the
floor. The ghosts scurry to the floor and begin lapping it up! Susan
collects some of Pierre's blood in a champagne glass and offers it to
the ghostly foursome, but they fight over it and it spills on the
floor, where they once again lap it up like dogs! Susan tells Pierre
to go outside, he'll be safe there, but Terry appears at the front
door, begging for his blood. Pierre runs to the roof and the ghosts
follow, but Susan saves him once again and Pierre runs outside. Think
Pierre is safe? Think again, as the quartet of ghosts drop a chimney
on Pierre, killing him! Now Pierre can spend an eternity with Susan,
his one great love. Isn't love grand?
I love Italian Gothic horror films and this little-seen black &
white film, directed by "Max Hunter", who is actually
Massimo Pupillo, the man who gave us the Gothic horror flicks TERROR-CREATURES
FROM THE GRAVE (1965) and BLOODY
PIT OF HORROR (1965), and written by "Jean
Grimaud", better known as Giovanni Grimaldi, who also wrote or
co-wrote the Gothic chillers THE
BLANCHEVILLE MONSTER (1963) and CASTLE
OF BLOOD (1964), is a good bet for those who like their
scares in a dark-natured, shadowy vein. The reveal that the ghosts
need blood to survive comes out of left field, but it is strangely
weird and satisfying, as is the music
score by "Peter O'Milian" (Piero Umiliani; FIVE
DOLLS FOR AN AUGUST MOON - 1970; TROPIC
OF CANCER - 1972). Gordon Mitchell portrays Roger with a
wide-eyed intensity, which is why I love him here. Erika Blanc is
pure evil incarnate and Paul Muller is an excellent deceiver who can
make anyone believe his lies. The only person wasted here is Edith
MacGoven as Terry, as her role is underwritten until the bonkers
finale. All in all, this is a film worth seeing and it is one of my
final '60s Gothic horror reviews, which makes me sad because I love
the genre so much, but I have pretty much reviewed the major and
minor ones worth mentioning.
Shot as LA
VENDETTA DI LADY MORGAN (a literal translation of the review
title) and also known as LADY MORGAN'S VENGEANCE, this film
received no legitimate release in the United States, no theatrical,
VHS or disc release in any format, but gray market company Sinister
Cinema offers it on DVD-R in the original Italian language with
English subtitles (it was never dubbed in English). You can also
watch it streaming on YouTube from user "Nathan Conant",
who offers a crisp-looking anamorphic widescreen print (which is how
I viewed it). Not Rated, but there is some grisly stuff on view.
WINTERBEAST
(1986) - Here it is, folks: the badfilm to end all badfilms! It's
got incoherent editing, terrible sound, grade school stop-motion
effects, a grating music score that gets under your skin like a staph
infection, amateur makeup and gore effects, a cast that couldn't act
their way out of a paper bag (including a lead actor whose moustache
changes from scene-to-scene) and, above all, a storyline that could
confuse a Mensa member, yet the film is such a train wreck, you would
have to be dead not to enjoy it (I can't speak for the dead, though.
Maybe they'd like it, too!). The film opens with Sergeant Bill
Whitman (Tim R. Morgan, the man of many moustaches) having a very
violent nightmare and then being called into a Ranger's station to
interview Ranger Sally Bradford (Lissa Breer), who was rescued in the
woods by a weird character named Dick Sargent (Bill McLeod, who looks
nothing like the late BEWITCHED
star). While Ranger Stillman (Mike Magri) and Dick trade homosexual
barbs, Bill questions Sally about the disappearance of Ranger Tello
(David Mica) at an abandoned hunting lodge deep in the woods. Sally
doesn't have much to say except, "I don't like that place. It's
so quiet, it's...so dead!", so Bill asks Dick to take Stillman
to the abandoned lodge the following morning to look for clues into
Tello's disappearance. Before that happens (this is where the
disjointed editing comes into play), Bill and Stillman
(who is obsessed with nudie magazines and drinking beer) take a trip
to the Wild Goose Lodge, the area's only operational tourist lodge,
to talk to owner Dave Sheldon (a lisping Bob Harlow) to see if he
knows anything about Tello's whereabouts. Meanwhile, a wooden Indian
totem comes to (stop-motion) life and pulls a topless female extra
through the window of her home, tossing her (obvious rag doll) body
against the outside of the house, killing her (If you aren't laughing
out loud at this sequence, you have no sense of humor!). After Bill
questions Dave and comes up with nothing (somebody should have
questioned Bill about the wild fluctuation of the bushiness of his
moustache in this sequence) and Stillman manages to win the lodge's
toaster raffle (it's a fucking used toaster, for Christ's sake!),
Dick finally takes Stillman up the mountain to where he found Sally
(and to confuse the viewer even more, Bill and Sally suddenly appear
on the mountain with a fellow named Charlie Perkins [Charles Majka]
and Dick is nowhere to be seen!). They all spot a gruesome sight
where human skeletons are posed with Indian totems just like in
Bill's nightmares. Bill wants to shut down the Wild Goose Lodge until
all the murders and rumors of Indian legends are laid to rest, but
Dave refuses since this is prime tourist season. Or does he have a
more sinister reason? As more creatures begin killing hikers (and
Sally), Bill and Charlie (who is an expert on Indian legends) uncover
the truth and destroy the source of the Indian curse, or so they
think. In the finale, Stillman has his head bitten off by a
dinosaur-like creature, Charlie is chased though town by a giant
chicken creature (complete with loud cackling sounds!) and Bill must
face the Winterbeast (Chris Lenge), an ancient Indian creature who
likes to strip humans of their flesh. I couldn't make this stuff up
if I tried! Not since EQUINOX (1967/1970)
have I been so enthralled by what is basically a film made with no
money and pure imagination. Like EQUINOX, this film is filled
with stop-motion creatures but, unlike EQUINOX, the creatures
here elicit laughter rather than awe (not necessarily a bad thing).
I'm sure that's not what one-and-only-time director/screenwriter
Christopher Thies and producer/editor Mark Frizzell were aiming for,
but, by golly, this is one of the funniest, most incoherent films I
have witnessed in quite some time. WINTERBEAST
is entertaining as hell and the humor, whether intentional or not
(for an example of the former, pay close attention as Charlie stands
next to a statue of a cigar store Indian), drives the film to
delirious heights that you will not see anywhere else. Just as it
takes special talent to make a classic film, it also take that same
kind of talent (only on another plane of existence) to make a film
like this, where all of it's deficiencies add-up to pure
entertainment. I guarantee you will never see stop-motion creatures
as unusual and cheap as you'll see here, whether it's living totem
poles, a furry creature that bursts out of the ground and drags away
two female hikers or (my favorite) a four-armed drooling creature
that attacks a guy rappelling down a cliff and rips off his head. The
only non-stop-motion creature is the Winterbeast itself and it's a
rather creative and effective full-body make-up job. But, by far, my
favorite creature is Bob Harlow as the dastardly Dave Sheldon, whose
lisp makes him seem gayer than Paul Lynde going as Rock Hudson's date
to a Liberace concert. When he dons a 20's-style harlequin mask,
lip-synchs to some old tune on a 78 rpm record and begins fondling
human corpses he keeps in a secret room at his lodge, it's the film's
creepiest moment and worth the price of admission alone. So what are
you waiting for? This film can be purchased on DVD for a mere $7.99
directly from the filmmakers at www.winterbeast.com.
It's full of special features, including deleted scenes and outtakes
and is worth every penny. I can't recommend this enough. Also
starring Dori May Kelly as Barbara, Charlie's girlfriend/assistant.
Originally filmed in 1986, but not released on home video until 1992
(via VHS from Tempe Video).
Support the filmmakers and buy the DVD. Not Rated.
THE
WITCHMAKER (1969)
- This
is one of those fever dream films that has haunted me as a teenager
in the 70's due to its' many showings on TV
(albeit in edited form). The great news here is that Code
Red has released an uncut 2.35:1 widescreen print that lets you
view the film as it was actually seen in the theatres in the late
60's. The plot is rather simple: A group of parapsychologists, led by
Dr. Hayes (Alvy Moore, also the Associate Producer and better known
as the crazy "Hank Kimball" on the GREEN
ACRES TV show [1965 - 1971]) go to the Louisiana swamps
to investigate a series of murders of women who were strung up
upside down from trees with their throats slit and all the blood
drained from their bodies. One of the group, Tasha (Thordis Brandt),
is a "sensitive" whose grandmother was a witch and quickly
catches the eye of Luther the Berserk (John Lodge, who left acting
shortly after this film to become Governor of Connecticut!), a
Warlock who has been committing the murders to keep his love Jessie
(Warrene Ott), a witch, young forever. Luther wants to bring Tasha in
as the 13th member of his coven and begins knocking off the rest of
Dr. Hayes' team sometimes using Tasha as his instrument of death. A
lone reporter on the trip, Vic (the prolific Anthony Eisley of THE
MIGHTY GORGA - 1969; THE TORMENTERS
- 1971 and many other genre films) begins to unravel the mystery with
Dr. Hayes as they begin to find the members of their party hanging
upside down drained of all their blood. Dr. Hayes puts Tasha under
hypnosis and finds out the truth: Tasha will take part in a Blood
Sabbath tomorrow and become the 13th member of Luther's coven. Luther
attacks the cabin and uses the body of one of the dead researchers,
Owen (Tony Benson), to attack the group. Vic and Dr. Hayes decide to
find Luther and Jessie and shoot them both in the head. They come up
with a plan to defeat the coven (which includes becoming invisible
wearing a necklace of wild garlic!), using the remaining female
researcher (Robyn Millan) as bait. They manage to subdue Luther and
tie him up as Vic (who is wearing the garlic neclace) invades the
coven and replaces the human blood for the sacrifice with pig's
blood. Luther breaks free of his bonds and knocks out Dr. Hayes and
the girl and tries to race back to the coven to stop them from
drinking the pig's blood. Alas, Luther is too late and his entire
coven is
killed. Tasha becomes herself again and Luther chases her and Vic
through the swamps, where Vic puts the garlic necklace on Luther and
pushes him into quicksand. Vic meets the same fate as Tasha knocks
him into the quicksand. I guess she didn't become herself again after
all. Director William O. Brown (whose only other known film is ONE
WAY WAHINI [1965], also starring Eisley) has crafted an
atmospheric chiller with good visuals (filmed in Marksville,
Louisiana), especially the shot of Brandt running through the woods
in slow motion holding her bare breasts in her hands. Rumors abound
that this film was shot with much nudity, but that's simply not true.
Even though this film was rated "M" when originally
released, THE WITCHMAKER is
practical when showing nudity, using branches and other objects to
cover breasts and showing nudity from the back instead of the front.
Actor L.Q. Jones (ROUTE 666
- 2001) was Executive Producer of this and next went on to Produce THE
BROTHERHOOD OF SATAN (1970) and then Direct/Produce/Write A
BOY AND HIS DOG
(1975). He and Alvy Moore had earlier worked as Director/Associate
Producer respectively on THE
DEVIL'S BEDROOM (1964). Most of the people appearing in this
film have, sorry to say, passed away. Anthony Eisley passed away in
January 2003. Alvy Moore croaked in May of 1997. John Lodge took a
dirt nap in October 1985. Warrene Ott hit the concrete condo in
January 1995. This is a good witchcraft film which should be viewed
by everyone interested in horror films. Also known as THE
LEGEND OF WITCH HOLLOW and was re-released in 1975 under the
title THE NAKED WITCH
containing footage not in the original film and Rated R. Many people
remember the Interglobal
Video version of this film that was released in the 80's. It's
the TV version missing some of the more erotic footage and blood. My
suggestion: Buy the Code Red DVD
version and watch the film the way it's supposed to be seen. Rated M
(a late-60's version of an R-rating). It was also available on a
somewhat scratchy widescreen print by the now-defunct gray market
label Midnight Video. Isn't it
amazing that all the films we remember seeing time after time on TV
in the late 60's and early 70's are now considered rare and sometimes
downright impossible to find? It boggles the mind.
ZEDER
(1983) - Slow-moving, but never boring, supernatural tale that
asks this important question: What if death was never an option? A
question like that has far-reaching implications and this film tries
to answer it for you.
The film opens in Chartres, France in 1956. We see Dr. Meyer (Cesare
Barbetti; ZORRO, RIDER OF VENGEANCE
- 1971) and Police Inspector Bouffet (Andrea Montuschi; THE
MERCILESS MAN - 1976) arrive at a children's camp, excited
about what is about to happen. They go to the room of young Gabriella
(Veronica Moriconi) and watch as the floor begins to buckle,
as if someone or something wants to get to her. Dr. Meyer grabs
Gabriella and says, "It's time, Gabriella. C'mon sweetheart,
it's all up to us now!" and begins running down to the basement,
Gabriella in his arms kicking and screaming. Inspector Bouffant says.
"If you think it's wise, we could hold off on this thing!",
trying to hand Dr. Meyer a pistol, but Meyer refuses, telling him a
flashlight would be more handy. As he carries a screaming Gabrielle
down to the basement, we see the stairs shake and rattle, while we
hear very heavy breathing on the soundtrack. "Show me where your
hiding place is", says Dr. Meyer to the young girl, "Where
are you? You're in here, aren't you?" Gabriella falls to the
dirt floor, digging with her bare hands and Dr. Meyer becomes
excited, asking, "Is this where you are? Is this where you are
hiding?", Gabriella shaking her head yes. "We found him!
C'mon down here!" screams Dr. Meyer, running upstairs and
leaving Gabriella alone in the basement, only she is not alone at
all, as we hear her let out an ear-piercing scream. We then see an
ambulance taking Gabrielle to a hospital, her right leg horribly
mangled. The Inspector's men begin digging at the spot Gabriella
pointed out and they find a wooden crate containing a skeleton. They
are able to identify the skeleton as that of Paolo Zeder, thanks to a
wallet found in the crate. Dr. Meyer yells out, "We found Paolo
Zeder! He stumbled across a K Zone!" What is very unusual is
that as soon as Dr. Meyer opens the sealed crate, he finds a slipper
belonging to Gabriella inside, the slipper to her mangled right foot.
How could it be in there when they just dug it up? That question, and
many others, will be answered in this extremely atmospheric and
frightening tale about immortality and the consequences that go along
with it.
We are then in Bologna, Italy in 1983. Budding author Stefano
(Gabriele Lavia; INFERNO - 1980)
and his wife Alessandra (Anne Canovas) are celebrating their one-year
wedding anniversary. Stefano bought his wife a nice bracelet and she
purchased a used electric typewriter for him at a pawnshop. He
is so delighted with the gift, that after making love to his wife, he
runs out of the bedroom to try it out (Alessandra tells him that the
only thing wrong with the typewriter is that it was missing the
electric cord, so she had an electrician make a new one). While
Stefano is trying out his new toy, the used ribbon comes loose and he
becomes extremely interested in what the previous owner wrote,
staying up all night transcribing it. What he discovers will haunt
him for the rest of his life, if he has that long to live, that is.
He goes to his university teacher, Professor Chesi (John Stacy; YETI,
GIANT OF THE 20TH CENTURY - 1977), to try and make sense of
it, but by the look on the Professor's face, it's obvious he thinks
no good will come from it. He reads from the paper Stefano hands him:
"The barriers of death shall at last be destroyed thanks to our
work and my return to life will signal the return of all. The place I
have discovered is the place the hierophant (i.e. any interpreter
of sacred mysteries or esoteric principles) was looking for."
The Professor wants to know where he discovered his, because only a
scholar, an expert on religious history, can explain what it means.
He wants to know from whom precisely he got this from. Stefano shows
him the ribbon from the typewriter and the Professor tells him to
look on the ribbon for any mention of "K Zones". Stefano
unspools the ribbon and finds this: "Found a K Zone completely
free and above suspicion. Ideal place...", but before Stefano
can finish, the Professor says an old colleague of his, Dr. Meyer,
wrote a thesis on K Zones, so he pulls out some binders and looks for
the thesis, but it is missing. He tells Stefano that the idea of K
Zones came from a man named Paolo Zeder, who one day just up and
disappeared. "He sustained that all the places of antiquity
where contact was made with the beyond, places like Delphi, Epheris
and Dordunne all contained common properties, which he called
alchemical, but what we call geological similarities. Now these
sites, which he called K Zones, were supposed to be different, that
is they defied all natural laws and they existed in a state of
suspension, on time, on season, on growth and on death.
Idealistically zero time and it will allow a return from the dead and
beyond." (In layman's terms, K Zones are pet semataries).
Stefano begins his search for the name of the man who previously
owned the typewriter, asking his policeman friend, Guido (Alessandro
Partextano; SWORD OF
THE BARBARIANS - 1982), if he could get the owner's name from
the pawnshop, which he does. The name of the man is a priest, Don
Luigi Costa, so he goes to his church to question him. Don Luigi
(Ferdinando Orlandi; MACABRE
- 1980) chews out Stefano, telling him he never owned a typewriter
(even though there's an empty typewriter stand in his office) and to
never come back to this church again, so Stefano leaves. After taking
a swim at a health spa with Guido, Stefano notices that the
typewriter ribbon and the letters he created from them are missing
from his locker, so he goes back to the church, thinking that he left
them there. He discovers from another priest that Don Luigi
hasn't been a member of this church for years. The man who told
Stefano he was Don Luigi was a fake, an imposter. Priest Don Mario
(Aldo Sassi) tells Stefano Don Luigi's sordid history. He was a
wonderful priest who took children to camp every summer, but then he
started losing his faith in God and deserted the church. He tells
Stefano that Don Luigi has a sister, Anna, in Remini, so Stefano and
Alessandra drive there. While Alessandra suns herself on the beach
(she has no interest in her husband's quest for the truth), Stefano
goes to Anna's (Maria Teresa Tofano; THE
NIGHT EVELYN CAME OUT OF THE GRAVE - 1971) address and
discovers she is blind as a bat and renting a room in the house, so
Stefano makes up a lie and tells Anna that he was good friends with
Don Luigi and she lets him see the room, which was Don Luigi's. In
the room, Stefano discovers a badge that his wife gave to Guido, so
he calls his friend, only to discover that he has been transferred.
Both Stefano and Alessandra find that strange, since Guido never told
them that he was being transferred (And how did the badge get in the room?).
As Stefano and Alessandra are about to leave Remini, Stefano sees
the fake Don Luigi putting Anna in a car, so they follow it, ending
up in a cemetery, where the fake priest takes Anna every week to pay
respect to her brother's grave, only she doesn't know it isn't her
brother's grave at all, but some stranger's grave! Stefano learns
that the real Don Luigi died in a Remini hospital and talks to Dr.
Melis (Marcello Tusco; DJANGO
SHOOTS FIRST - 1966), an old family friend of Alessandra. He
tells them that when Don Luigi died, he didn't want to be buried in
Remini and gives them the address of the crypt where he was laid to
rest. Stefano discovers that Don Luigi's crypt is empty. We then
discover that Dr. Melis is working for Mr. Big (Bob Tonelli; BALSALMUS,
MAN OF SATAN - 1970), a rich businessman who is financing
experiments pertaining to K Zones, where an elderly Dr. Meyer and an
adult Gabrielle (Paula Tanziani) are performing experiments on Don
Luigi's dead body to see if he comes back to life. They have buried
Don Luigi in a K Zone, the same location where Gabriella nearly lost
her leg as a child (she now walks with a limp), a "holiday
summer camp" for children, which has been long deserted. Stefano
makes his way to that location, too, and what he discovers may end up
costing him and his wife their lives.
Make no mistake, this film is a slow burn supernatural tale that
requires patience from the viewer, but like a fine aged wine, the
patience pays
off, transporting the viewer into territory that is downright
frightening and nightmare inducing. Director/co-screenwriter
Pupi Avati (THE
HOUSE WITH
LAUGHING WINDOWS - 1976) is considered an Italian national
treasure and is still making films up to this day. He takes his time
showing us how K Zones work, but once he does, showing us a toothless
Don Luigi rising from the dead and slowly chasing Stefano while
laughing creepily, it's an image you will not soon forget. I've been
reading reviews of this film where people accuse Stephen King of
ripping off this film for his book PET
SEMATARY (made into a film in 1989), but that is just being
ignorant, as the plot of this film is hardly original, but Avati does
put a nice atmospheric spin on it to get your mind off the fact that
the story has its roots in ancient folklore, yet he makes it seem
totally original. While lacking any nudity and very little blood or
graphic violence, this film doesn't need it, because it is not that
kind of film. When the violence does come, it is totally shocking and
surprising (especially a close-up of young Gabriella's mangled leg).
I wish someone would have told me this when I first went to a movie
theater to see this film in 1984. Motion Picture Marketing (MPM)
released this film to theaters under the title REVENGE
OF THE DEAD (they also released it under the review title),
using a phony advertising campaign that made you believe you were
going to see a film in the vein of Lucio Fulci's ZOMBIE
(1979), even releasing it Unrated, bypassing the MPAA! When I was
watching it onscreen, many people walked out of the theater
disgusted, feeling deceived and rightfully so, thinking they were
going to see a gore film and getting something completely different.
Even though I was angry for being fooled, the film won me over. I
have seen the film many times since then and it keeps getting better
on each viewing, as I pick up things that I didn't notice before.
This is a film that demands 100% of your time when watching it, as it
is cerebral as well as entertaining. If you can't give this film your
full attention, I recommend you not watch it until you can. I love
films that play with your perceptions of love and death and this film
fits the bill nicely. I'm going to review some of Pupi Avati's
films in the near future, but most of them are harder to find than
tits on a rock, although I did find a couple of them (Thanks, Rogue
Video!).
Shot as ZEDER,
this film had a U.S. theatrical release by the aforementioned Motion
Picture Marketing in 1984, with a fullscreen
VHS release by Lightning
Video a few months later. An uncut, widescreen DVD from Image
Entertainment arrived in 1999, with a Blu-Ray
from Code Red following in 2018. If you want to save money, YouTube
offers a nice anamorphic widescreen print dubbed in English (Although
it is obvious nearly everyone is speaking English). Also featuring
Enea Ferrario (Avati's HOUSE
OF PLEASURE FOR WOMEN - 1976), Adolfo Belletti (THE
HEROIN BUSTERS - 1977) and Pina Borione as Helena, the first
victim of Zeder. Not Rated, but there is nothing in the film
that goes beyond an R-Rating, just some honest-to-goodness scares and chills.